Kindergarten, to Go or Not to Go.

all i know is if you wait and let him be the 'older' one in the group, he'll be excited to get his driver's license before the rest. And hence, the rest of his school years may be a bit more advanced as well, so you don't have to worry about him lagging behind and struggling - up to you mom :) good luck

SEND HIM!!!! It's very normal for boys to have a hard time sitting still. As long as he knows the basics, that's the important thing. If you hold him back, he's going to be so much older than his peers and if he ends up playing sports, he won't be able to play with the kids in his class because he'll be too old. Depending on what city you live in, certain club sports have age requirements and his age is going to force him to play with the kids in the next grade up. May not seem like a big deal now, but TRUST me it will.

He already has 2 yrs experience? Let him go to school. You have all summer to get him used to it. Train and teach.

He sounds ready.. Most kindergartners do not know how to write much. They may scratch out their names but it is not always perfect.

We forgot to work on fine motor skills with our daughter so we worked on it a few weeks once school started and she was fine..

Have him roll little balls out of playdo. Have him connect a box of paper clips to make a chain. Have him use clothes pins to pick up things. Have him separate colored buttons, coins etc.. When you are folding clothes have him button up all of the shirts.. He should work on puzzles,

Have him draw with regular sized crayons and pencils. Teach him how to trace. He can use his finger or the colors or the pencil.

Have him eat blueberries using a toothpick (if you trust him to do this). Have him eat popcorn one kernel at a time. Have him string cereal into necklaces.

For the sitting 10 minutes or longer, begin attending story times at bookstores or libraries. Explain to him he will need to sit and let the person read. If they ask questions and he wants to answer, he should raise his hand ad wait to be called upon.

Send him. There is no reason to hold him back.

I don't think I saw this in another response so if I'm repeating someone else, I apologize. Texas school districts are now beginning to enforce the age requirements. Since K is not required here, you do have the option of holding him out but the district could make the decision to enroll him in 1st grade because of his age when you do enroll him in school. I'm not sure what district you are in but I do know that Plano ISD is doing this for the coming school year (2010/2011). And from what I understand, most (if not all) school districts will make this move sooner or later.

Aside from all the legal stuff, I think he is a fine place to go to K this fall. My son is also delayed in fine motor and when I had him evaluated with the district they informed me that he would get all the practice he would need in K . . . that's part of what they do there.

Good luck with whatever decision you make!!

You REALLY need to send him! It will probably help him immeasurably! It will be awful for him to turn 7 in kindergarten. Plus, in school if they think he has any learning or motor skill issues, they will speak to you and evaluate him with your permission.

In preK, my son's teachers pointed out that they felt he had fine motor issues. OT helped him a lot--he still hates to cut, color, etc, but he CAN much better than he was.
I wouldn't hold him back for fine motor issues...lots of kids have it and with work and time it definitely improves.
Can he get OT? Even O. hour a week will help. It certainly helped my son. The frustrating part was waiting for the eval, which you have already done. His OT was completely covered 100% by our insurance. I had to wait all summer for the eval, so I paid a family friend, who is a special ed teacher to come once per week & do fine motor activities with my son. I was amazed at what he would do and how hard he would try for her! I know I couldn't have made that same progress myself.
Also, in K last year, the kids were reading by Christmastime. I'd send him. Good luck!

7 is "old" for Kindergarten... and if he is bigger than all the other kids... and subsequent grade levels, because he is 1 year older... then this alone can affect a child's emotions and "fitting in" kind of thing. Or with older kids, they may think he "flunked" a grade.

Kindergarten is 5-6 year olds. 7 years old is first grade.

I would send him.
Just practice with him at home...

There are ALL kinds of maturity levels in Kinder... its okay. They will not be perfect.

all the best,
Susan

S.,
If I was you I would send him. In public school they would be able to give him the therapy and help he needs. At least he would already be there getting used to the ambiance. He will learn together with the other children, maybe at his pace, but he will be able to see and copy others his age. Children mature at an unbelievable speed. So don't wait, let him go and let him get soak with a new experience. Again, if he is not ready the teacher will let you know. They will test him and provide him with the help he needs.
Blessings

7 sounds old to still be in kinder. Usually by 7 they are in 2nd grade. I'd send him.

Send him. The kids in Kindergarten are of all levels and skills. Many haven't received any PreK education. Your son will be well within the curve.

you should check your state laws on this first as to whether or not you really have a choice to send him to kindergarten or not. at kindergarten registration, they typically test the kids to see where they fall in the range of skills because there is a wide range since some kids have been to preschool and some haven't. the teacher will tell you then if there is anything to be concerned about. most likely your son is fine and will develop the skills you are concerned about in kindergarten. i suggest calling the school with these questions too.

I think holding him back would be a mistake. School is meant to be a place of learning. Kids have a wide range of abilities, especially in the younger years. Since your child has already been to preschool I think he'll be ready for kindergarten. As for his fine motor skills, those will come with time.

Personally, I think holding children back when they are "age" ready doesn't make sense. Of course we want our children to excel and want to "help" them to do so. However, I think that holding a child back limits them in other areas.

As a prior post mentioned, IF your child needs therapy, the school should be prepared to handle that. Just keep an eye on him, watch his development and stay involved with his teacher. IF he needs therapy, you may need to request additional evaluations from the school for them to determine his needs and get him started in the right programs. (I've read other posts that say the schools aren't always "on top" of getting kids the therapy or evals they need.)

Best of luck

Keep in mind that kids grow and develop fast. A lot of changes can (and will) happen between now and September. From your description, your child sounds kindergarten ready.

I'm in agreement with everyone else, ya gotta send him. Some people debate this when their child is near the cut-off point, but your son isn't. He is clearly at the age to go to kinder next fall. In fact, he'll probably be one of the older kids in the class as it is. If you hold him up another year, he'll probably have social issues because he'd be significantly older than the other kids. You do not want to do this!

If it turns out that he does have issues above and beyond typical five-year-old boy behaviors, either the teacher will talk with you about it, or you can share your concerns with the teacher. But it really seems like he should be attending next fall!

C.
www.littlebitquirky.blogspot.com

Not sure where people are getting their info. In CA public school I sent my daughter when she was 4, turned 5 in October after kinder year started. She's in sixth grade now and doing great in all respects. I know every kid is different but I have to say it seems a lot of people hold their kids back to the point of excess because they think they'll be ahead of the game and the top of the class. Not True! There is such a wide range of ages in my little ones second grade class it's crazy and other than size you cannot tell maturity wise whose older or younger. My second baby is a July girl and still very young for the class but one of the most mature and best students in class. As long as he meets the basic criteria for being ready and he's got some social skills (two years of preschool gave him that I'm sure) I'd send him. Can you really imagine him in another year of preschool?

Send your son to school these will be developed you can help him at home Play Doh~ scissors~tearing paper or tissue paper making different things out of them by using glue~stringing beads on string the plastic kind~open and closing containers~coloring~painting~Print practice the ABC's.My son is 6 he turned 5 in Sep.we had to wait to send him here in KS you have to be 5 when the 1st school day starts so since he was just a few wks off we had to wait.He went to preschool for 2 yrs he is tall and looked older than all the other kids.Next school yr he will be 5 then he'll be 6 shortly after some say the older the boy is to start school the better he will learn I don't know how ture that is my kids are eager to learn.

I would send him.

Learning better writing, sitting and listening skills is all part of Kindergarten. If there is a problem with him being disruptive, then the school can determine that and offer additional support and services.

If you hold him back, on your own accord, then there are possible legal issues wherein the law states that every child age X needs to be registered for school, and when he does get there he'll be almost 2yrs older than his classmates.

M.

if he does not go to Kindergartin would he ramain in preschool? I would send him to Kindergartin if he is old enough to go. This is just my opinion though. My son is also 5 years old (attends Kinder.) and his handwriting is not that great. However, It has improved over the months with practice. When my son 1st started preschool, I could not get him to color or do anything with a pencil. He just does not like to write. our first accomplishment was getting him to try to write/scribble for at least 3 to 5 minutes and day.
I think because it is somewhat required in Kindergartin and he sees the other kids doing it he will be more willing to work at it.
Also, I think most 5 year old boys don't want to set and listen for more than 10 minutes but a good teacher could work with him on that.

SEND HIM!

You have two extremely good reasons with plenty of data behind them to support this choice.

#1 The window of opportuniy to learn reading and writing skills closes by age 9. ALL intervention services provided to children in public schools are provided based on GRADE, NEVER AGE. Therefore, if he is an older 7 year old 1st grader and shows signs of reading failure that are obviously in need of targeted intervention, he will not get this until he is BELOW his current intructional grade level. So, lets say he starts this as an older 8 year old 2nd grader (which he will be) you have LESS than one year for him to have targeted intervention while intervention is hands down the most effective. Having a developmental issue is a huge red flag and it will be much, much more likely that reading will also be an issues, so if you hold him back, he losses a lot more than a year.

#2 The data is VERY clear on this. Teens who are older than their grade level peers in the upper high school years are statistically more likely to use drugs, drop out of school and have contact with the juvinile justice system. Speaks for itself.

Think on this, from the expeirience of a Mom with developmentally delayed kids and an advocate for a lot more kids like them...another year of typical services for a child with special needs will not help them on little bit. If they were going to mature and learn what their peers did from the kind of environment that they have already been in (preschool) then another year of what did not work already is not going to help them either.

Put him in Kindergarten and beging the process of determining how much help he needs and learn how to get it for him. As it is, he will be one of the older kids in his class, and this IS NOT a matter of "maturity" it is an issue that will respond to intervention if you get it before it is too late. Don't wait. I cannot tell you how many 16 year old kids I have helped whose parents were told to hold them back to "mature" and these kids can neither read, nor write at anything like a grade or functional level. It is a HUGE struggle after age 9. You have a little over 3 and a half years left, make them count and don't hold him back!

M.

My personal opinion is that this "redshirting" that has been going on lately is ridiculous! It is getting out of control. Pretty soon you will be seeing 8 year olds in Kindergarten. Send him, he is old enough for Kindergarten. If he needs extra services, he should have an IEP, and he should be provided occupational therapy for fine motor skills.

Kindergarten is not required in Texas. You can skip it all together. But since he has already been in preschool for 2 years, send him. He'll be fine. If he can't sit still for more than 10 minutes, he is a perfectly normal boy.

Updated

Kindergarten is not required in Texas. You can skip it all together. But since he has already been in preschool for 2 years, send him. He'll be fine. If he can't sit still for more than 10 minutes, he is a perfectly normal boy.

Go with your gut feeling - sounds like this means hold him back. I would hold him back or you might be regretting your decision during his entire school years. Another year, in a different preschool sounds like it would be the right decision for him. From my experience, it might make all the difference in how he views school.

My daughter will be starting kindergarten at age 6 yrs 4 months, there is no Law out there that states they have to be in if they turn 5 before school starts. Our daughter will turn 7 a few weeks before school finishes but she really needs to be in later for many reasons, her 4k teacher even recommended it. Have you check with your school to see if they have a ready for kindergarten class. Usually runs from june-july it is like summer school. If so I would register him for that and they can give you an idea if he is ready. Also it is better to register now to get in and then if you don't feel he is ready when school starts to take him out of the running in sept. Best of luck with your decision it is hard. But don't listen to those who say he has to go because he doesn't.

The only thing you can do is give it a try. We always want to make sure we give our children the best possible educational start. The key is to encourage a love of learning. If it does not work for him and you have to take him back out don't beat yourself up about it. The only thing you can really encourage is his natural abilities. Please do not let the age thing bother you if he does turn 7~ He will be fine...On the other hand..he may just surprise you~~

I am going to be out of the ordinary here and say, You are his mom and You know best! I wouldnt just look at his skill level, but how you think he will handle being in a class setting all day. Talking with his prek teachers should give you some really good insight. They have been with him in that setting, I would really listen to what they have to say.

I have had 3 different friends hold their sons back a year for kinder and they have not had any struggles in regards to that.

In the end, do what you think is best, dont just take the most given advice.

Good Luck!

Send him. He will adjust as the year goes on. Kinder is the best place to start this process. Plus kids are always different in school than at home.

I suggest you send him to kindergarten. The motor skills will devolpe as he practices them in school and at home. My daughter was developmently behind when she started school and during that year I noticed great improvement in her writing, listening, and attention. If when you register him you let the school now of his problem they will work with him to overcome.

I think and I could be wrong - by law you have to put him in K now and you can not wait until he is 6 or almost 7 because of his birthday.

If your little one turns 5 after August - then they will have to start K the following year, but if your child is already 5 when school starts in August then they have to be in K.

Call the Elem. School that is zoned for your neighborhood and they can tell you more.

Good luck.

My son went through the same problem. You know your child best and that is how I made my decision. Tutoring for fine motor and a great kinder teacher is the key. Fun activities (fine motor) throughout the Summer also helps. I opted to put my son in "transitional kindergarten" and it made all the difference so, he started after he turned 6. Just remember it is about what is best for him...not what is best for the rest of the children. Good luck.

I would for sure send him this year. The schools have GREAT programs to help kids. My son gets a ton of help with his writing, reading, etc. He is in 1st grade now. My youngest is starting Kinder in the Fall and although he is great with numbers, shapes, etc., his writing is pretty bad. He also can't read at all, although quite a few kids in his Pre-K class can. I know that the teachers and specialists will help him if necessary though.

Good luck!

I feel like you should enroll him. He may surprise you. My son was a little behind and had some serious anger management / temperament issues. I was prepared to spend lots of time in the principals office with him but he actually loved school and learned to just do what the others did and has since found his niche in mathematics and music and does amazingly well at school. Had I held him back he would likely not be this way because he would be so far ahead of his class mentally and emotionally, when actually he is the youngest in his class, because of a summer birthday.

He sounds like a typical Kinder student. Go in a K class and not one child can sit still and a lot of kids that age have fine motor skill issues. Everything works itself out throughout the year. If you are concerned speak with the local schools councelor and your child's pediatrician. My little girl is a very young Kinder student (late August b-day), but I spoke with many professionals and decided she was ready. Overall parents do know best, use your best judgement but make the decision based on facts.

I would send him to kindergarten now. At 7 it would seem a little bit too old to be in Kindergarten.

As a former 2nd grade teacher, I say send him. WORK WITH HIM AT HOME, reinforcing academics, as well as listening skills. Children mature so quickly in their early childhood, he could be completely different at the end of the summer. An additional option would be to keep him at a private Kindergarten next year. If he struggles and needs to repeat, he could always go into public Kinder at that time, lessening the stigma of doing Kinder twice at the same school. Just a thought, but given his age, I think it's a bit premature to keep him back right now.

My daughter was born in October and was not ready for kindergarden at 5. I would suggest that you talk to whoever did the evaluation and ask what 'extra help and maturity' means and what you can do to help him. Check with the school and talk to the kindergarten teacher as well. There might be things you can do over the summer to help prepare him.

.

Hey -
I say send him for the same reasons that everyone else is saying send him (those are the main reasons). But, also, there is a boy in my son's class (1st grade) that turned 8 this year. He towers over the rest of the kids and he seems to be "angry" all the time. I don't know what all of his issues are, but I can't help but wonder if he is frustrated because the other kids are younger and smaller than he is?

-L.

I know it's really tough to decide what's right, but based on what you have said, I would send him to Kindergarten. Schools usually have handwriting specialists that can help him do extra work to build that skill. Communicate with his teacher and make sure to track his progress with her throughout the year. If he is not ready to continue on to first grade he can always repeat kindergarten but I would be surprised if that were necessary. In my opinion, going to kindergarten could be just what he needs. Best of luck to you!

Hi,
I emailed a friend of mine who is a Kinder/1st gr teacher and here was her response...
"My personal opinion is to send him to kindergarten. The kids are expected to have these types of difficulties as kinder is their first time of being in actual "school". Kinder teachers are the best at helping children get used to being able to focus and work on fine motor skills. If the teacher feels that his learning is not progressing, there will be additional help and interventions that aren't available at preschool. Often just being in that actual "school" environment is all the child needs to break that patten of not being able to sit still."
I am a first grade teacher and completly agree with her.
Hope this helps.
Have a blessed day!!

I agree with the comment about Montessori school. Both of my kids are in a Fort Worth ISD Montessori program that is free. My 6 yr old (in K) is not the sit down and follow orders type of kids and this way of learning has been the best thing for him. He is already learning to wirte and spell and pick out alot of words to read. My 10 yr old is in 5th and has excelled also. She has been in Montessori since 1st grade.

Holding him back will make him quite old for K and the kids will pick up on it and will be teased.

If you have any questions about the Montessori program please do not hesitate to email me. I do not have internet at home, but do at work.

My daughter turned 5 in September and I also couldnt decide. She has been in preschool this last year and I am also worried about her sitting still, but after much research I resgistered her. They are already going to be of the oldest as it is.

Look at it this way, if he is having a problem with Kindergarten, you can always unenroll him and let him repeat it next year.

I have several friend that teach and they said we would be surprised at how well and fast these kids get adjusted to kindergarten.

You know your child - do in your heart what you think is best. Don't worry about being 7 in kindergarten. In later grades he'll probably actually have an edge. My daughter's preschool teachers have said since 3 year old class that by kindergarten the teachers expect them to be able to sit and listen for 20 minute periods. Definately try some OT it can help a lot - I highly recommend Baylor - Our Children's House for OT.

My daughter has similar issues. She is 5, a January birthday. We had her tested to get into Catholic school - she currently goes to Catholic preshcool for the last 2 years. They called us in and told us her test scores were incredibly low and she was nowhere near ready for kindergarten. A tough pill to swallow, but we set out to find the right program for our daugter. Currently she is in a 4 year old class that meets M/W/F 9:30-2:30. We didn't want to repeat the same thing again, but we wanted to keep her in private school, preferably Catholic. We did consider Montessori, and I do think that is an excellent route to take. We found a PreK program at a different Catholic School that is meant to be between 4 yr old class and Kindergaten. It is everyday, all day class, so it gets them ready for kindergaten more. They work on writing and such more. I think it will be a great fit. There are other kids in the class that are there for the same reason. I have talked to many Moms keeping thier kids back a year before kindergarten, so if this is what you decide don't feel bad about it and don't feel like you are alone or an outcast. That''s kind of how I felt reading some of these posts! Geez! Some kids just aren't ready yet! Better to keep them back early rather than later.

I would seriously consider a Montessori school. I know it would be expensive but if you can afford it, it really sounds like your son is a tactile/kinestetic learner. If this is the case, most public school classrooms will be harder for him to learn in because most (not all, but most for sure!) are not set up to learn this way. I would NOT hold him back because of his age but I would look at different options and really research the public school he would be going to (go talk to the K teachers to see how they accomodate kinestetic and tactile learners). If they are like "no, students are expected to sit and listen, etc" I would then research other options (with Montessori being top choice). Even if you could just afford to send him there for 1-2 years it could really help him make the transition to public more easily. Good luck! It's SOOOOOO hard to make school decisions, I really hate that part of parenting!

Ed. to add that I would also research learning styles and figure out which one his is for sure and then really try to teach him using that method at home when possible, especially if you have to send him to public and he doesn't get it at school at all. You could also try to find a tutor who specializes in different learning styles if you don't feel comfortable doing it yourself, that might really help him adjust too.

As a first grade teacher, I say send him. What better way to work on sitting still than to be put in a situation with other kids who are expected to do that? All kids are special and have individual needs in some way. Once your child starts school, communicate with the teacher and be your child's advocate.

Kindergarten is not mandatory in the State of Texas. You could "homeschool" him or keep him in preschool for another year and then send him in first grade if you think he is ready. You could also do two years of kindergarten if the first year doesn't go well for him. You could also do private kindergarten and then public school 1st grade or if he isn't ready, public school kindergarten so they are two different things for him.

He definitely needs to go! They will teach him those things there. Plus, by law, he has to be in kindergarten.

Don't wait he will catch on as they go through the year. Keeping him out a year will not help. I have 4 kids and 2 were slow to catch on to things and had to do 2 years in kindergarten but I recommend you send him.

I have one suggestion. Have your son examined by a qualified Optometrist who specializes in Vision Therapy. My daughter's problems were caused by her eyes not working together. After a few weeks, she was a different child. Since then, two of my grandchildren have had similar problems. My daughter took them to an optometrist who gave them vision therapy and they are having no more difficulties. The younger the child, the better since they've not learned to compensate. Google Vision Therapy to find one. I know of only two, one in Plano and one in Longview, but there are others. Good luck.

My brother was held back and he resented not being able to attend school with his friends. When it came time for his son to attend school, he was not held back. Now that my nephew was in college, my brother said he wished they had held my nephew back. For boys, especially, being held back seems to work very well. It gives them time to mature. Boys develop differently than girls and the extra time seems to be very beneficial. Good Luck.
V.

Go ahead and send him to kindergarten. then if after a year of that he is still behind, you can always repeat kindergarten.

Do send him! I know these decisions seem really worrisome but really, your son will do just fine. Kinder teachers are all pretty much really loving and caring and nurturing. I'm sure he'll get any extra attention if he needs it.

As an older mom of a now 24,23, & soon to be 18 yrs old girls. My now 23 year old (middle child) went to kindergarden & was considered immature (she could not pay attention for very long as she wanted to play all the time) at the tail end of the year the teacher recommended that she be placed in pre-first & then first for the next year. We went ahead & had her go through pre-first and then to first. She excelled in all of her studies and held honor classes, which was great for her self esteem, I would recommend this if pre-first is still an option. No child like to feel like a failure or overwhelmed. Remember though what ever decision YOU make will be the right decision as it sounds like you will be there for him no matter what you decide.

Not knowing your child I cannot tell you what specifically to do but here is what I learned while trying to decide if I should send my son who has a late summer bday to kindergarten the year he turned 5. I came across several people who had wished they had not pushed forward and sent their child when their age dictated they could enter kindergarten but I never came across someone who was disappointed that they waited another year. I've heard it called the year of the gift. Good luck with your decision! You know your son best and only you can make the decision for him.

If your family has the time and financial ability to do lots of traveling, keep your son out of school and take advantage of this last opportunity. Once he is enrolled in the school system, you will have to follow rules of attendance. It's a shame, because travel is one of the best ways to learn and school days off are generally too busy. If you have older children in school or cannot travel alot, then put your son in school to give him the opportunity to participate in academic challenges and develop social skills.
You can always have your son test into first grade with same age peers if you work on his reading independently, (or with tutors). Homeschooling might be an option until your son can make an easy transition. Definitely, make learning a part of his day, everyday, all year.
Have a blessed day.