My 3 1/2 year old daughter has been on an emotional roller coster since we have had her little sister 3 months ago. We both work out of the house, hectic hours, but we do take turns spending one on one time with her throughout the day. We have done nothing different in her time with us since the baby has been here and she has been crying, yelling, swinging her arms, stomping, punching things like the couch or floor, talking back, not listening, giving us absolute grief when it comes to bedtime now. We feel exhausted, and sad to see her acting out like this. Any helpful advise please send it, we are not sure what to do at this point.
hello A. i would try sitting her down and talking to her and asking her if there is something worng that making her so mad and what can you do to help her get over what she fealing as far as the bed time goes maybe go out and buy her a new blanket or something just for her to have at bedtime well that all i got
A.
Hi A.. Did you prepare your girl about the baby coming? I too have a 3 1/2 year old and a 3 month old. It's tough working making the toddler feel secure in her new place. My girl acted out the first month we were home with the baby, hitting, screaming, tantrums, talking back. Bedtimes are still hard because the baby is up when she is supposed to be sleeping. I try to take 'special time' with just her during the day, dad does too. We each take turns letting her pick something to do; read, play games, or cuddle...whatever SHE wants to do. Sometimes she even picks going to get an icecream. It has really helped so far. I also include her on the babies things. She helps to wipe the baby, helps hold his head while I'm nursing, gets diapers-burp cloths-clothes-etc.. I've made sure to take her place as only and youngest child to that of the big sister. She even has a shirt that I found at babies r us that says "I'm the big sister". We also enrolled her in preschool with kids her own age. Just to get her out and let her be her own person. I wish you the best of luck, please let us know what you find that helps you.
This may not even be a jealousy issue...I know my son didn't go through terrible two's at all...He's going through it now at 3 1/2!
If you are giving them equal attention, even alone with *mom*, there is honestly nothing you can do. This time will pass. She just needs to get used to another child being there. Encourage her to play and be involved with the new baby at All cost!! Every new step the baby makes, choking hazards, etc. let her be part of it all! She will be right there to protect her little sister. I don't blame you for your concern, I would be right there with you, if things were reversed, but I think You need to consume your thoughts with ways your four year old can contribute to your new baby's life! Your four year old used to be the baby, you know?
Good luck!
C.
My best suggestion is to make the baby 'her responsablity'. By that I mean have her help you with the baby. Right now, she see the baby as something that take your attention away from her and focuses it on the baby. Have her help with making the bottles (if you use them), have her get the diapers when it's time to change them, have her help pick out the cloths, etc. In doing this, you will now make the baby something you do together instead of something that leaves her out. You also need to remember that for a toddler, any change is a big change. It takes them time to reorganize their thoughts and figure out how the change effects the rules. I had some of the same problems with my middle child that you are having with yours. Give it time and be patient.
