Is Mothers Day the Same or Did I Raise Kids Who Dont Care

I usually set up the family togetherness on mother's day, for myself, my mother and my mother-in-law. We either do a lunch or a dinner all together, some years it is the men cooking out at so-and-so's house or we go out to eat.

If a group gift is gotten for my mom I organize all of us kids on price and what we will get, then I go get it... this year I told everyone they are on their own because I was super busy with work (but said flowers are a good idea). Thankfully my sister-in-law is super organized and always has something in mind so mother-in-law gift is usually taken care of by her.

I planned out my Mother's Day - went shopping bymyself (got a new outfit), had some togetherness, then dinner with the family (all the moms & their families), had some alone time to relax, read a book and take a bath and kissed everyone good night. It is what I wanted so I just told everyone and that is what we did :)

Oh and I would just tell the the kids that this is my day so we are hanging out together as a family, no hanging out with friends today. You could also say from such and such time to this time is JUST family time, you can hang out with friends before or after.

Hi R.-

I'm so sorry you had a disappointing Mother's Day. Kids in their tween and teen years are not the most sensitive bunch! I wouldn't be too concerned with their lack of effort on this one day, but would look more at how they behave and treat you throughout the year. If your kids are generally respectful, helpful and appreciative of you (within reason of course, they are kids) then I don't think them neglecting to do something special on Mother's Day means too much. I know it doesn't help lessen your disappointment, but I'd rather them be good throughout the year and "forget" mother's day then to have them be awful to me all year and then suddenly transform themselves for one day.

Good luck,
K.

sorry you had a crappy mother's day :( read my posts, mine stunk too! i think the secret in our family is that someone (be it an aunt, sibling, whatever) always calls everyone and says, "okay i am having a thing for mom for mother's day, come on over at such-and-such time". maybe since your kids are younger (young adults i mean) that tradition just hasn't started yet. if anyone asks what you want (did they?) just say, i just want us all to be together for mother's day. see if that helps! or if all else fails, come right out and say it. my mom does. it doesn't mean less because you asked for it. better luck next year...

One thing my parents always stressed as we grew up, was that it was nice to have mother's day and father's day, but they never wanted gifts. They felt that we shouldn't just be good and nice on one day, but throughout the year. So we all grew up knowing that in a way everyday were those days, and just tried to make things easier where we could

I would let the family know how hurtful it was to not have anything done or said to you,

My boys are still very young....I get the cute crafts from school and the hugs and kisses. I will learn from your experience today and be sure to stress the importance of our special day. If I were in your shoes I would call a family meeting and express your feelings. Explain to them that it's not the glorification of "MOTHER" that you're expecting, it's more the value of togetherness. I'm sure they would appreciate your honesty and expectation...sometimes kids are so wrapped up in their "life" that they don't realize the little things...like Mother's Day. We need to give them a little nudge.

Happy Belated Mother's Day!!

Welcome to the ME generation...the generation of entitlement. Probably not just you this is happening to. Happy Belated Mother's Day!!!!!!

You have to out and out say. "Hey Mothers day is coming up, so you guys (meaning husband, kids) need to start planning for my day." "Here is the date, and here is what I want." Give them a list of options.. "I want 3 of the things off of this list to happen and want you all to smile about it too", hee, heee..

I know it does not sound like it is from the heart, but since you are the mom and probably plan everything else in their lives, they are not used to thinking and doing for themselves, much less anyone else..

Tell them the one thing you really want is to spend time as a family on that day.

Happy Belated Mothers Day!

Neither of my sisters bothered to pick-up the phone to wish me a Happy Mother's Day despite both being mothers themselves. We love 600 miles away, and you'd think that would be a good excuse to reach out. I did - I left both messages early in the morning, neither returned the call. One sent an e-mail last night, the other forwarded an e-mail this morning.

Thank God for my husband and children making it a day that revolved around my wishes.

I hate to say that we need to let our families know what our wishes are, but you'd like to think you wouldn't have to. My mom was always really clear about what she wanted to do (which usually involved a long drive somewhere), but it was her day, so that's what we did.

I hope next year is the opposite of this year for you!

Boys need a push. Ask the older ones to remind and help the younger ones before the day. Let them know your feelings were a little hurt this year, but don't make a huge deal out of it. Also keep your expectations down. They aren't little anymore. It was good then because you had control and you were the center of their universe then. They still love you but between adolescence and busy lives.......be happy with a card or phone call. When they do that make a big deal and thank them for making you happy and remembering.

I have 4 kids... 12, 9. 3, and 8 mos. My older kids did not even acknowledge that it was MD... AND I cooked dinner to boot! They couldn't even try and not bicker with each other.

My older kids dad (my ex husband) was much the same way. He never remembered, nor went out of his way for MD, bithdays, or anniversaries. I always make a big deal out of special days and thought I taught my kids to do the same, but I guess his 'I don't care' genes were more dominant than my 'always give 110%' genes. It hurts. I can sympathize...

Happy Mother's Day!!!