Ok, so I am a lot like my mother: a worrier. We worry about everything, especially our health. Now, I am usually really good at knowing when something is wrong with my body, but then there are numerous examples of when I freaked out over nothing.
Currently I am 24 weeks pregnant. I had a miscarriage with our 1st pregnancy, my 2nd pregnancy resulted in a beautiful princess, and this 3rd pregnancy is progressing well according to all of my appointments, ultrasounds, tests, etc. BUT....I cannot shake this feeling that something is wrong or will be wrong. I don't really have any basis, just this feeling.
I've been attempting to sort through why I have this feeling and I think it has to do with the left over emotions from the miscarriage, the fact that I have a child and KNOW full well what I'd be missing if something happened AND I teach Special Needs children, some of whom were born prematurely. I didn't teach Special Needs before my daughter and really wasn't exposed to many children with severe, intensive needs until my current teaching position.
Am I the only one who freaks out about the "what ifs?" I just need to hear that I am not crazy and that everything is really okay like the doctors are reporting. My husband thinks I am nuts, but I just can't shake this feeling.
Please know that I do not "obsess" over it, but the thought enters my mind every so often and then I have to reassure myself that everything is fine. I'm having one of those moments right now......
Thanks! What set it off was that last week someone mentioned to me that their baby was born at 24 weeks and that thought popped into my mind and I couldn't shake the feeling that came along with it. I'm okay now. I had a chat with my on-call pregnancy coaching nurse and went over all the latest stats and I feel much better! She calls and checks in from time to time and tonight was one of those times.
I am encouraged by all of your support and I wish for each of you your own journey of finding peace as I find mine. Many of you mentioned never being the same after a miscarriage and I completely agree. It is a difficult and painful process to go through and it does make us more cautious and apprehensive after because it becomes a very real possibility. I know that my daughter would not be here if I would have had my first baby and I look at her am so glad that God blessed me with her. I'm going to lean on my faith in Him and trust that he has provided me with this opportunity and that no matter what comes, everything will be alright.
Again- Thank you for giving me the boost I needed to get through my little "spell". :) Take care and blessings to all.
I think this is common after suffering a loss. When I was 13, my younger brother died. Since then, I am in constant fear that I will lose someone else. The anxiety has become much worse since becoming a mom.
I think most of us with a history of miscarriage felt like that through the "typical" pregnancy(ies) too.
It always helps me to remember that the things we worry about are NEVER the things that actually happen. More common are the blindsides in life! So why waste your energy worrying? :) You'll be OK. Best to you!
I am just like you. I had a miscarriage, then a healthy baby boy and am now pregnant and it took me about 24 weeks to believe that I was carrying a viable pregnancy even though all my blood work was great and I saw a healthy baby on ultrasound.
I also used to work with special needs kids and was so scared that my baby would have some issue.
I even started worrying that my baby would be born ugly...I know crazy, no mom is going to think their baby is ugly but these are the things that kept me up at night.
I'm now full term and waiting for my baby girl to come any day and all these crazy thoughts have passed. I'm sure they will pass for you too.
Good Luck :)
Im from a long line of worriers but we are obsessers too! I used to have a medical dictionary and came down with something different weekly until my mom took it away! Its normal to be nervous because you just never really know. But what's the fun. In life without taking chances? Just pray and enjoy every moment you get!
I am like this, too. Just like you, my mom was a worrier and now so am I, either through her influence or genetics (probably from both). Just breathe, relax, realize that all you can do is take care of yourself and trust the doctors that you have, and (if you are religious) pray that everything will be okay. I know that if I ever had a miscarriage, I would probably be the exact same way (especially since pregnancy hormones make us a little crazy anyway). Take care of yourself, try to do something like yoga that helps to calm your worries, and remember that your daughter is fine, so there's no reason why your new baby won't be fine as well. Good luck with your pregnancy, and congratulations!
I come from a long line of worriers! Grandma, Mom, aunts, etc. Drives my husband crazy. I am doing better but still have my moments. I have the Serenity prayer on my fridge and when I feel myself getting really panicky about things beyond my control, I say it to myself.
I'm sure everything is fine. Congratulations!
I think ur totally normal. Hearing and seeing what CAN happen makes alot of pregnant moms paranoid.
Just try to relax, and realize something my OB told me once, you are more likely to have a completely normal and healthy child then to not. Good luck, and try to enjoy :)
You aren't crazy. I was told that I'd never be able to have children and then I had a late miscarriage in my mid-20's and another very early miscarriage in my early 30's before I had my daughter this past Feb. Everything about my pregnancy was perfectly normal but the entire time I couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to happen and we'd lose the baby. Thankfully everthing worked out fine for us. Our daughter is perfect and we are happier than we've ever been.
I coped through my anxiety by calling someone I trusted (in this case, my MIL) to help talk me off the ledge. It was tremendously helpful.......I hope you have someone you can talk to that helps you when you feel a bit overwhelmed.
I feel just like you. I lost my second baby at 19 weeks. I found out about that loss on the day we were supposed to find out the gender of the baby (boy).
Though my third pregnancy went completely fine, I stressed the entire time. In addition, the day we found out the gender (girl), my son was diagnosed with autism. I have been a high school test coordinator and have been administering standardized tests to autistic children for several year, and I missed my own son's situation because it was so mild.
Now my daughter is four months old. I have already had Early Intervention assess her and I constantly look at all kinds of developmental charts. Early Intervention said that she is completely normal as far as they can tell at four months, but I just can't be sure. Sometimes her eye contact is not great, so I'm always checking in with other babies her age to find out their level of eye contact.
Anyway, yes, I stress constantly. Even when I think my daughter is neurotypical, I then constantly worry about SIDS. I don't know how to stop worrying. I do hope you are able to find some peace. I'm sorry I don't have any helpful advice.
You are not the only one. Having a miscarriage will mess with your mind. My second pregnancy ended in an early miscarriage. I got pregnant again right away but was crazy the entire pregnancy. I saw counselor the whole time but was still worried. I had my beautiful little girl. I then lost my next pregnancy at 11 weeks. I am now 15 weeks pregnancy and while I worry some, it's like I reached worry overload and just can't worry that much anymore. I have accepted that I can't control any of it. The result is that I haven't really connected with this pregnancy. I kind of just want to get through it.
We can't help but be affected by the traumatic events in our lives and it is perfectly normal to worry when we are in similar situations.
the problem is that you might jinx yourself. Think about a healthy baby brother or sister for your little princess. Think about how you deserve to be happy and how grateful you are for the opportunity to be pregnant. The miscarriage was with the first pregnancy which means the second 'princess' jump started your body. You will be fine, go to your appts and relax...don't jinx it! Congrats.
You're not crazy.....unless we both are ;)
I think I know what you mean- Soon after my 2nd baby was born, I started getting this feeling that something was going to happen to him (like SIDS). I didn't get that feeling after my 1st son was born, so I guess that made me worry that maybe it was a premonition. I remember crying, and when DH asked what was wrong, I told him that I had a feeling DS wasn't going to be with us long- of course, DH thought I was crazy. I'm guessing it was a combination of my PPD and how frail my son looked compared to his brother. His brother was 8lbs 5oz when he was born, and my 2nd was only 6lbs 5 oz. I know plenty of healthy babies are born weighing less, but it was soooo tiny to me. Even though he was given a clean bill of health by the docs before we left the hospital, it took me a couple of weeks to shake that feeling.
Anyway, I think your theory about why you are worrying seems very logical.
I'm sure everything will turn out fine. Blessings :)
I have one child, he's 8, he's my eveything. I have never lost a child during pregnancy so I couldnt begin to comment on anything as far as that goes, and I am so very sorry that all of you moms who have had this awful experience. I think, and I'm saying think because again, Idk what it's like, but I think that you are sooo Not crazy. Sometimes if we didnt worry, we wouldnt be prepared to handle things, if that makes sense. You worry about the what ifs so if the what ifs happen, you kinda already have a plan, ya know?! Too much worrying can make you feel and sometimes seem crazy to others, but doesnt mean you're crazy, just means you want the best sometimes. I hope everything works out for you, pray for the best, and I've already said a prayer for you..good luck!
I do it way too much too. I don't like this about myself and sometimes I think I really am crazy.
Not crazy, totally normal. My first, third, fifth and sixth pregnancies ended in miscarriages. My second and fourth went to term with healthy babies. Although I would LOVE to have a third child, I know I couldn't endure the stress of being pregnant again, even a healthy pregnancy would probably put me over the edge just waiting for the ball to drop.
I was worried throughout both of my healthy pregnancies that it wouldn't turn out well, but they did. Then after they were born I worried some more! HA
I lost a baby in between my 2 girls. My 3rd prgnancy, I kept thinking, if only I could make it to 3 months I would feel like this one will stay, then it was, if I can make it to 6 months, then If i haveher early she will make it. And know she is 2 years old. I always say payers for both of my girls because I know God will keep them safe. So to answer your question, no you are not crazy!!!
I wouldn't reassure myself that everything is fine. Well, what if it isn't fine? Why not tell yourself that you are going to be prepared and love the child no matter the outcome.
Oh no your not the only one. My first pregnancy went really well and I gave birth to a healthy baby boy, but with number two, all my quad screens came back positive for Down's and I had an amnio done and found out my baby girl would not have Down's. But I still worried that something would be wrong with her. If she stopped moving, I thought she died in utero. It was a very bad pregnancy always being worried about something being wrong with her. She was born healthy but then took a turn for the worse and was diagnosed with a rare disease but she will be able to live a normal life. Just try to take it easy and not stress like I did. talk to your doctor, maybe they can give you some tips on calming down.
I'm the same way. I'm always waiting for something bad to happen.
