I'm in Need of a Decent Nights Sleep

my question is does she go back to sleep after you check on her and does she sleep for a long period of time when you bring her to bed with you?
looking into what does she want in the night may help...
and sorry, I think that if you and your husband would like some sleep, you'll have to endure the challenge of letting her cry through her want or have her sleep with you to start a family bed.
something else you could try if it's difficult listening to her cry, have a timer around your bed and when she wakes, set the timer for one minute and after one minute go check on her, continue this for a few days then move on to two minutes before you check on her, continuing for a few days then move it to three minutes and so on.
maybe you could also start letting her cry on a Friday if your husband has off on the weekend, then it wouldn't conflict too much. If you look at the big picture, one week isn't too bad, yet i believe by checking on her so much, you are sending her the message that it's okay to wake up in the night.
However you decide to handle this situation, be patient, it will take some time to change.

I don't really have any advice for you but I do feel your pain. My girls were sleeping through the night by about 3 months but every once in a while there's a few days that for some reason one will cry during the night and it lasts for a few days. This is one of those weeks. Last night, for example, one of them cried 3 or 4 times during the night and I too would just rather let her cry sometimes but she shares a room with her twin sister and I don't want her to wake up too and also my husband gets up early so he needs his sleep as well. I'll end up taking her into our bed and put her back but then I have to do it a couple of hrs later. In the past though, usually after a few days she'll stop doing it and go back to sleeping through the night so I hope that will happen for you as well.

Good morning M.,
This is a habit you can break before you creat it as a routine for her. Babies as well as children need schedule so badly and its up to us to it as mothers to set that schedule for them. Start by getting her into a schedule 1st pick a time. Then keep her getting to bed at this time you have choosen for her. you now work around her schedule. Then wheh she wakes up in the night, Change her 1st. 2nd feed her. 3rd put her back to sleep- IN HER BED. NEVER NEVER in YOUR BED. Babies are so much smarter than we give them credit. This will take a few nights but by the end of the week you WILL have your sleep back. So many mothers let thier children take over thier beds and what they dont realize is that children if comfortable anywhere it should be thier own bed. Starting from day 1 write down how long she cry's for may be 15 minutes next 10 and so on. If you really stick to this it WILL work for you, but then do your best to keep her in her own bed, if you need to lay down with her do it in her bed or her room. This will take a couple of days but stick to it & you will soon gedt some sleep. I am a mother to twin 8 year olds. The best advice anyone ever gave me was schedule schedule schedule!! Til this day our daughters go to bed at 7PM people ask how we do it & I say thats all theyve ever known. I really hope you try this and stick with it, you will get your sleep back.

Hi M.,
Teething may be the cause since she is at that stage. Do you give her a binky? Try that. We used a binky for my son, put the nipple on an icecube and let the cold nipple help numb her pain. Motrin with the right dosage from your doctor can also help alleviate this discomfort. If you feel inside her gumline and feel hard edges, or sharp ones, she's teething alright. :-)
We usually visited family out of state so when we got home it was hard for us to put our son back into his own bed since one of us slept with him at families houses. At one year, we ended up putting him in bed with us. Finally at four years old, we were strong enough to put him in his own toddler bed, and with encouragement, it only took us three days to get him comfortable enough to be in his own bed. So, even if you do allow your daughter to sleep with you for your own need of sleep...I'm with you there! Many people kept telling us negative things about us having our son in bed with us. They about nagged us to death. We basically told them that it was OUR decision and when we felt we were ready, and our son was ready, we then will make the transfer. And we had to tell people to stop butting into that part of our parenting. We did it our way, and it worked out great!!! Not every child is the same and needs the same parenting techniques.
I really feel for you staying in such a confined home like a motor home. You do what is best for you and your family and your current situation.
I hope this helps. And I hope all of you get a good nights rest soon! :-)
G.

Take her to bed with you, there is nothing wrong with her sleeping with you and it will save you alot of stress, if that is where you both will end up, it best to start there,for now. Until your circumstances change, then sleeping arrangements can change but for the better of the household sounds to me starting out where you will end any ways it the best way to handle it for now and deal with any other bridges that come up later ie. moving her to her own room and bed ect. good luck

I've recently been going through this with my 9 mos old. My ped gave me some really good ideas that worked. It is sort of a graduated crying it out. I let her cry for 15 or so min, and then I go in and check her diaper and I feed her half as much as I used to and hold her half as much.

Then I put her down and she either screams her head off and I just put on earplugs and let her work it out, or she gets the idea and she falls asleep. Then a few hours later we do that process again (if she awakenes). This lasted two really hard nights, and miraculously on the third night, she slept for 10 hours.

Basically, you just gradually do less of whatever you've been doing in the middle of the night. (less feeding, holding, rocking, etc). So it's not just cutting it all out cold turkey. Maybe give her tylenol too in case it is teething. But waking in the night just gets to be a habit for them, and habits are tough to break.

I too didn't think I could let her cry it out, but this approach seemed more gentle to me.

You've gotten a lot of good advice. Go through and figure what's best for you and your daughter.

I would just add to look into her nap schedule. Could she take an earlier nap and get more tired for bedtime?

Good luck. I know how important a good night's sleep is...for my sanity, my health, and my temper.

Let the baby sleep with you!!! You will all get a better night's sleep. Read the book Good Nights and you will feel better!

My daughter had several ear infections that contributed to some of her lack of sleep. It was a rough go for a while. I empathize with you for your lack of sleep since I have been in your shoes before just like most of the mothers in this site. If you can afford to take her to the doc to have her ears checked out, it is worth a try. Ears seem to bother babies more at night time because of the way they lay. I don't think it is bad for you to bring your baby in bed with you either. Why not. After all she is a baby and she needs you. Also, do you have any family members around that are willing to take the baby off your hands for the night? All moms need a break. Even though you have only 2 kids, that doesn't mean you can take everything on yourself. If you think about it, back in biblical and all the way through to the 1900s people had servants and maids and helpers in their homes helping them out with chores and child raising. People lived closer with their families so their was more help from them too. Most other countries, even the poor ones have helpers come into their home too and help them out. It is no wonder why we Americans need sleeping pills and depression medications and anti-anxiety pills. We need help and we need to be willing to accept it too. I know your husband is going to be taking on a new job soon, it wouldn't hurt to ask him to sit in the living room all night with the baby so you can get some sleep. Promise him a big surprise the next day if he does *wink wink*
I hope you can get a good nights sleep soon. My husband and mother in law have been saviors to me in the sleep department. I would have gone crazy if it weren't for their help. Oh and one word of advice. When you get your sleep, don't over do it. Sleep until you wake up and feel refreshed and don't go back to sleep because you can, otherwise you will feel worse. I am talking 8 hours max. You don't want to get up feeling more tired than you already feel. Good luck

First, I'll ask this:

Is she taking a long nap during the day or multiple naps? If so...cut them down to one nap that is no more than an hour and a half long. If she is not napping a lot then I am sorry to tell you that there isn't anything you CAN do but let her cry. She needs to learn to soothe herself in order to fall back to sleep when she wakes up. Right now she is conditioned to fall asleep when she is lying on you, which is warm and comforting. She needs to cry it out. Husband can get earplugs at Walgreens if it is THAT intolerable for him.

We were living in a trailer with a 2 year old at the time that my then 10 month old was killing me with his need to nurse in order to sleep. I was dying from lack of sleep -- literally, but I was so afraid of my baby waking up my toddler and then having to deal with TWO crying babies, I gave in and brought him to bed with me so he could nurse all night long. As a result, I was so exhausted I felt like I would just stop working. I had zero energy, zero tolerance, zero fun being a mommy and I felt so guilty! It was a vicious circle!! A good friend advised me to read "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Richard Ferber and it changed our lives. It's a type of "cry it out" method, but you go in and check on baby at different intervals and give them love and reassurance while they are in their crib. If your husband has issues with being woken up, get him some earplugs, assure him that this will only take a couple of nights (it took us 2 nights and by the 3rd night my son could be put in his crib wide awake, go to sleep on his own without one tear, and then sleep 10 hours through the night)and give it a shot. You and your baby BOTH deserve a good night's sleep. I highly recommend getting the book and doing this. It was hard the first night, but not so bad on the second night...the rest is history. Good luck. I seriously cannot express just how much I feel for you right now. Hang in there.

A.
(SAHM of 4 boys - 10,8,5,and 5 months -- all good sleepers thanks to Dr. Ferber!)

Elena,

She is most likely teething. In the book "What to Expect the Toddler Years", there are references to night waking at 12, 24 & 36 months due to teething. Try giving her at recommended dosage of Motrin at bedtime and see if that helps. Motrin is better for teething then Tylenol, but with any of them you have to follow the weight/age and only give it for a few nights.
Keep in mind that there is usually a reason why they are waking at night, and unless you want to have them sleeping in your bed long term, don't put them in your bed. I learned that the hard way, after my DH put our youngest in our bed a few nights in a row. It took me 10 days to get her back in her own bed.
You may go through this several times with teething and potting training and bad dreams, but eventually they do sleep through the night. Of course by then they are teenagers and they are sleeping all day...just kidding.

It is possible that you have trained your baby to wake up because she has learned that eventually she will end up with you in your bed, and ultimately that is most likely where she wants to be. My son was waking up in the middle of the night, and I started to wake him up myself at around 10 or 11 when I went to bed, and feed him. He now can make it til 6 from 10. Which is great! If I don't wake him, he is still up in the middle of the night. Babies are easily disturbed from routine though. When we had to wake him in the middle of the night for his antibiotic, he would then still do it when we were done with the 10 days. We then had to retrain him to sleep longer.
The other thing is they need to learn to fall asleep on their own at this point. That way when they wake up in the middle of the night, they can go back to sleep with out your help. I loved the book "good night sleep tight", she has great ideas. But one of the key things is to not put your baby down fully asleep, make her fall asleep on her own. We have started a routine with our 11 month old, so he knows what is coming. We brush his teeth, read a book, put his music on and his humidifier and then say good night. He cries some nights, but usually no longer than 5 to 10 minutes. If he cries longer than this, I offer a bottle, then put him back down. At this point, he usually rolls over and goes to sleep...
Good luck!
K.

A bed by yours or have her with you, though the first option might be better if your husband is a light sleeper. It's easier to work with a problem then against it. CIO isn't the greatest option anyway because children sleep through the night when they are ready, and even kids who CIO have periods of regression in their sleep habits as they grow developmentally.

Honestly, if she sleeps better near you, it just might be she needs to be near you...she's still very little. It dosn't last forever, she won't be 17 and still sleeping there either.

Young Living Essential Oils makes a scrumptious blend called Peace and Calming which works wonders..Lavender oil is also a good choice. You may dilute with almond oil when applying and don't forget to use it on yourself as well ;-)
just a few drops rubbed on the soles of the feet....
good luck,
B. Gettel OTR/L CHT CCH
Eclectic Body Work
Tuscon, Az.

My daughter is also 13-months old, and she goes through something like this when her schedule has been disrupted by travel/house guests or when she is teething. When the problem is because of a disrupted routine, she does indeed usually need to cry it out (takes 20 minutes to an hour). When the problem is teething, the only solution I've discovered is a dose of infant Tylenol (this was recommended by her doctor and works beautifully). Also, generally good naps mean a good night's sleep for us. Good luck!