I Need Help with New Seperation Issues.

Hi D., I was on vacation with our 2 1/2 year old last week as well and found M & T the hardest days to transition back to "school". Luckily I have changed jobs so have the flexibility to hang out with her at daycare until she is comfortable going to one of the teachers...I hope that each day it gets a little easier for Gianna, (great name) and you too....is your husband trying to get involved as well....it is easy for us as Mom's to feel it has to be all us but it is so nice to see our daughter completely engaged with her Daddy..he's upstairs putting our sweetie to bed now...again...I really think that each day it will get a little easier..it sounds like you are very sensitive to her and are helping her ease though this..this too shall pass...All the best in Mommyhood, N.

Hi D.,
Just want to tell you that you are not alone. My 2 1/2 year old has suddenly started this separation anxiety the last few weeks as well. She has never had an issue with me leaving but lately it's been horrible! I would venture to say it's a phase.....let's hope it's a quick phase!! :-)

hi D.,

My son is about the same age, born 2/07. The past month or so, my son has been waking up 2-4 times a night, crying for me. If my husband goes to him, my son gets more hysterical until he is with me. And he wants me to stay with him until he is completely asleep (sometimes I think he is fully asleep, but wakes as soon as I start to leave..).
Both my son and my 15 mo old daughter have also been in daycare 4 days a week, since 3 months. Just as you describe... love the teachers and classmates, run in at dropoff, want to stay and play at pickup time. The past couple of months my son has had slight separation issues in the am, mostly with my husband (I drop off 1 day, he drops off the other 3). He cries when entering the room, but within 5 minutes of our leaving he is happy and playing with everyone. (the teachers tell me this, and I have stuck around to peek in a couple of times)
I don't have any answers, but just wanted to let you know we are going through the same thing at night with the same age child. Hopefully it is a phase. We are also going on a family vacation next week for 10 days. Will see if we have similar issues as yours upon our return, with increased separation issues.
I can sympathize with the heartbreak, best of luck,
Kim

I am having similar problems with my son born 4/07. I had read that sometimes new separation issues crop up around 2 1/2, so I am expecting this to just be a phase. At day care, he clings, but can then be distracted by one of the caregivers pulling him into an activity. I plan a couple extra minutes to sit with him in the morning at day care before he transitions over. At home he is clingier than ever, and I just try to stay nearby. It's strange because he has always been one to run down the sidewalk without looking back. I am assuming that he will grow out of this in a few months.

Hi D., That sounds really difficult. I'm sorry... Maybe something bad/traumatizing happened to her while you were gone?

That is so sad for her. I am so sorry for you. I would be so heart-broken as well. My kids have always slept with us. It has never been a problem because we have two double beds pushed together and a loud fan for white noise. I have always noticed that the more you try to push children away the more they cling, and the more you try to hold them close the more they push away on their own. I would definitely suggest keeping her as close to you as possible rather than trying to push her away more. Don's be away from her any more than you absolutely have to right now. And let her have the pacifier if it is making her calmer. My kids nursed for longer than two years. She will only be a baby once and what you do to her now will definitely have a lasting effect though many people will tell you that it won't (I have a 14 year old).

I have a 3 year old son and a 5 year old Daughtor. They started Daycare for the first time ever this month. I thought i was going to have to quit my job the first week they cried so much when i left- Screaming and pulling my legs back into the room. I was thinking of ways to make it fun for them, so i started letting them pick out there own outfits in the morning or night before and let them pick out the breakfast they anted to brign to school with them. On the way to school i told them how i would pick them up after school and they have really adjusted well. My opinion is to provide her with something ot look foward to before bed and like picking an outfit from a few you set out (so she Matches LOL) and letting her know how fun it will be in the morning to get dressed pretty together- that way she will go to bed with the thought that you and she will be doing something together in the morning. And the breakfast thing allows lets her know that she will pick out her breakfst every morning, with her mother and that she will not be alone. This will pass it will get better and she will allow you vacation time again- just sooth her fellings now with good fun girl things - like getting pretty every morning together.