Hi G.! At 10 months, your DD does not need to eat every 3-4 hours at night any more (but God bless you for going so long without a good night's sleep!). I'd start by trying to eliminate the night feedings, since these are just for comfort, not for nourishment, at this stage (not that comfort isn't important, but it doesn't need to include your boob!). I found the book "Secrets of the baby whisperer" very helpful on this. Work on teaching your daughter other soothing techniques besides nursing.
Next, if your DD is 10 months, I wouldn't bother with a bottle--I'd just go straight to a sippy. I assume she's eating more-or-less regular meals in her highchair by now, and is maybe drinking water or juice in a sippy along with them? If she's not drinking a sippy with her meals, introduce one then, as part of the normal eating routine. Your goal is to get her used to yet one more way of getting nutrition (since she's already both eating a variety of foods, and nursing). Just put some formula in a sippy and hand it to her at lunch!
Finally, if you can manage it, try to take it slowly in reducing feedings one by one. I finished weaning my DD at 10 1/2 months (she's now 15 months), but I took 2 months to do it. I gradually dropped one feeding at a time, which luckily for me went quite easily since my DD LOVES food and, by the end, would rather eat a meal than nurse, anyway.
One more suggestion--can your husband take over bedtime, if he hasn't already? You should disappear to another part of the house (take a few minutes to yourself to relax!), and let him put on her pj's, give her a bottle, rock her, whatever your routine is. Establish a routine that you're not involved in, and she'll be less defiant about not being nursed. It will take a few days to get her used to it, but be consistent and DO NOT let your husband call you in if she fusses too much. If she knows there's no other option, she'll take the bottle. AND you'll start a nice dad-daughter bonding tradition, AND you'll get a few minutes to yourself every evening. My DD's long weaned, and I still head to the couch to lie down at bedtime every night, since I'm off duty!
Good luck, and congrats on nursing so long!