How to Teach Safety to Special Needs Child

Updated on August 13, 2013
M.G. asks from Fairfield, CA
6 answers

Let me preface this by stating that we all are very lucky to have our children and I am beyond words grateful for what happened in an otherwise horrible situation.

My son is autistic and has no fear. He does not understand the idea that streets and cars can be dangerous. I was inside with my son while my daughter and child I care for were out front playing. I opened the front door to tell them something and right as I'm closing hear hear my daughter exclaim my son's name. Next thing I know I have a kid(young teen?)bring me my son stating that he ran into traffic on our street and he was able to grab him so he wasn't hit. Yes, I am beyond words grateful and thankful for this person. I profusely thanked him, offered him money, which he not only declined but said "it's what you're supposed to do to help people."

Well after all this and now that I'm calmer than I was I have to ask: How do you teach safety to a kid who doesn't understand the basic idea that a car is NOT going to stop for him and it is dangerous? I've been able to teach him not to touch a hot stove but as I think about that is one of the only safety things he seems to fully grasp. My child is a runner. It is more than obvious to me that I've failed and am failing to teach my child about safety in this regard especially. So, how do you do it?

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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

Visit autismspeaks.org - they have toolkits and one of them may be safety related. You can also contact them and they may have ways to help.

You need to remember that YOU ARE NOT FAILING. Autism is a neurological wiring issue. His brain just works differently - trying to figure out how it works and how to work with it to help him function in the world is the big challenge. You're not failing at it, you're trying your best to make it work.

My son is also autistic and I can see that he thinks differently. Very logic based, very literal. Rules work for him, especially when they make sense. I don't know if your guy is rule based, but if you can figure out what works for him re. behavior, try to use that in other areas.

There's a blog that I discovered - adiaryofamom.wordpress.com - it's a mom with a neuro-typical daugher and an autistic daughter, and her experience form diagnosis to the present. You may find some helpful stuff in there in general.

3 moms found this helpful
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C..

answers from Columbia on

I don't know that you can teach him something if his brain is wired differently and it's something that he can't learn. Instead, you supervise him or make sure he is supervised by someone who can keep him safe when he can't make decisions that are in his best interest. At. All. Times.

2 moms found this helpful
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J.A.

answers from Portland on

My daughter is also on the autistic spectrum, though not as severe as your son. We didn't try to teach her safety, per say. We taught her a routine and a response. We exagerated looking both ways, getting down on her level and pointing until she began to look herself, and then we exagerated jumping back when we saw a car in the road. We did it over and over again until she did it automatically. She still has trouble spotting cars, but when she does see them, she clears the road right away.

2 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Grand Forks on

I know a few autistic children who have specially trained service dogs for companionship, safety and independence. These dogs are trained to help prevent dangerous behaviours as well as to alert parents to dangerous behaviours.

1 mom found this helpful
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E.B.

answers from Beaumont on

My son is also special needs. It is TOUGH to teach them this. You didn't mention your son's age but ours is 11 and just now is starting to "get it". I just had to take precautions as though he was a toddler, no matter how big he got, I had to keep him near me for that very reason. Ours was only allowed in the fenced yard without supervision. Good luck and don't be so hard on yourself. It is hard...

1 mom found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

They are so rules based it is scary! Have you ever had him tug you or get your attention to point out that someone has got in front of you in a restaurant line? Sorry always have to explain to Andy that people go to the bathroom so chill, it isn't the cafeteria line at school!

You make rules.

My son is 14 now and latch keyed all last school year. He can rattle off every rule including the rule that if a situation isn't covered by a rule call mom for clarification. You have a better chance of sneaking into a bank vault than our house!

So make a rule, no running into a street, heck no running away. Show him throughout the day how other kids are staying near their parents, tell him they are following the rules. Show him how his sister follows the rules. Explain that once you know he understands that rule you can teach him new rules for approaching a street, walking in the store.

Every kid I know, and he has a fair few friends, are also rule driven. Not to say your son is but dang, a lot of these kids are.

1 mom found this helpful
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