How to Teach 1-Year Old That Hitting Is Bad

Mine went through this phase. I would just not show any attention. I'd put them down and say NO firmly. Then I would busy myself with something else. They want a reaction - that's why mine at least did it.

Talking and explanation doesn't help in this situation. She hits and thinks it's funny.

In this case, I would suggest that the thing she desires is your attention. So, take it away. Anytime she hits, a firm but calm "no" and walk away from her. If she tends to follow you, put her in a safe, contained place, like a pack and play or her crib. Let me get ahead of some complaints about this...no, it won't traumatize her or make her think her crib is a punishment, it's a safe place and this isn't a punishment, it's a natural consequence-- if you hit people, they don't want to be with you.

This is exactly what I did when my son bit me while I was nursing him... put him down, walked away, and directed my attention elsewhere. No yelling (even though it hurt), Just "No", removed him from my lap, and stood up and walked away. The gentle guidance (telling her 'gentle', ect) will be more useful when she is cognitively more aware... right now she thinks it's a fun game, so the important step in the process is to break the 'fun' aspect of it.
(I agree that they don't understand the word "no", but it is human impulse to say something. You can also look stern and say "Ow!" firmly as you put her down.)

I don't believe in telling them that they've hurt you or you don't like it - kids this young (and even those 4-5-6 years old) don't yet have empathy and don't yet care if you are hurt It's not that there's something wrong with them - they just aren't there yet. It's like potty training or first molars - you don't teach it, you wait for it.

What they DO care about is being deprived of your attention. So being set down with a brief "No hitting" and isolation from you is the best technique. Don't engage, don't lecture, don't explain. Once you do it 20 times, you'll see a change in behavior.

You hold their hands and say 'hands are for clapping' while gently clapping her hands together.
They don't really understand 'no' at that age.
Just model the behavior you want to see and praise her when she does it.

You can teach them simple tricks.
Our family always like asking "How big is Suzie?" and when the baby raises their hands over their heads the grown ups raise up their hands too and say "So big!".
Everyone enjoys the game!

Really - it takes awhile for parents to learn how to re-direct.
You never tell anyone not to think about a purple elephant - because then everyone thinks about a purple elephant.
You give them something positive to do that takes their minds away from purple elephants.
If they are using their hands for something you don't want them to do - hand them some play dough or something age appropriate that they can mess around with.
Clapping hands together is not hitting anything or anyone else.

A stern "No hitting" and a one min time out.

I will clarify that at this age, a time out for my kids was simple - immediate removal of attention. So if you are holding her, set her down. If she's sitting on your lap, set her on the floor and stand up so she can't get back up.

I kept my pack n play set up in my living area. I would usually put mine into it for safety during the time out But again, not more than 1 min at age 1.

I would just say "no hitting" and then set her down and not give her attention. Or direct her attention to something else. She likes the reaction she gets and it will be a while before she is old enough to really understand. She will understand as she gets older...it just takes time.

I would gently but immediately show her you are hurt and put her down. I would say something like "Janie hurt Mommy," and then put her safely down. Make sure everyone follows through with this. No and caressing is a game to her so I would definitely stop using that when she hits. Try the caress when she is being a good girl in your arms and praise her like crazy when she does it to you.

Has she been watching Three Stooges videos?

Try gently grabbing her wrists and moving her away when she swings at you.

And I hate to say "smacking you in the face is just a phase for her", but, I think it is! She will stop eventually, one way or another.

She's going to continue doing this until she has a reason not to. And the reason won't be because you tell her not to, or show her "gentle". Her brain hasn't developed enough to process it.

What WILL work is if you hold her hands in yours enough for her to not be able to continue hitting you. You can tell her "We don't hit" but the only thing that will register with her is being away from you. Put her in a pack-n-play immediately and walk away from her. What will teach her to stop doing this is the association of not getting to be with the person she is hitting.

It's not the same as time-out, because time-out is something you do with older children who know that they are expected to sit still and wait. She can't do that yet.

Don't use her bedroom crib for this. You don't want her to stop liking her crib. Have the pack-n-play wherever you are in the house - living room, kitchen, etc. Move it around. She'll soon start to understand that hitting means she goes in the pack-n-play. Be consistent.

I agree that if you're holding her, you need to tell her no and immediately put her down. Using gentle hands is good I think, and can maybe be done during times when she's not hitting. If you're not holding her then put her in the crib and walk away, or just turn and walk away. It's hard, they don't get it. She will eventually move on! :)

I said to mine "hands are for hugging not hitting" or "hitting hurts". I also taught/used sign language. It helped my daughter tremendously. She was able to communicate before she started talking.

I agree this young, a simple stern no hitting and putting her down is a great way of getting the point across. She will get it if you're consistent in your response to her.

It is not uncommon for a 1 year old to do cause and effect (hitting or dropping something from the highchair).

I always like the idea of saying what you DO want, such as saying 'gentle' while acting gentle, instead of saying "Don't hit."

Not sure if time-outs work for this age, but I would still put her in the pack-play (or similar) so you are given a break from being hit.

Ignore it. You don't need to put her in time out or put her down or tell her "no." Once she stops getting a reaction (ANY kind of reaction -- negative or positive) and attention, she'll stop. This will work even when she's older so it's a helpful thing to learn to do.