How to handle kindergarten graduation with committee who disagree

Updated on May 14, 2007
B.V. asks from Chicago, IL
12 answers

I'm on the gruduation committee for my kindergartener and I feel that the other people in the committee really do not give a hoot about the graduation. It's more like they want to give them their diploma, donut and water and get out. There is going to be a little reception afterwords in the gym, but they are just going to be serving donut holes and water. I think it should me more memorable than just a donut hole and water. But when I mentioned otherwise, I was made fun of. I suggested a cake, maybe cookies and juice instead of water. For this school to be in a good area, they sure are cheap. They are not even having a cap and gown but they are sure thinking of buying somewhat expensive gifts for the teachers out of the money we will collect. Is it me or is this how it is? Comments? Suggestions? I feel like just donating the reception goodies out of my pocket but then I feel like then they just have more money to spend on the teacher gifts.

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Summary

Most parent think It is a kindergarten graduation, caps and gowns and all are a bit much. However, if you want to make a big deal of it to make your child feel special, there's nothing wrong with that. Take your child for ice cream afterward, or make his/her favorite dinner that night. Whatever suits your comfort level.

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S.

answers from Chicago on

I think that people take the whole graduation thing to an extreme. It is Kindergarden not high school. We had an eighth grade graduation, a high school graduation and a college graduation. Kids do not need a graduation from kindergarden.

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R.

answers from Chicago on

Kindergarten is not even legally mandatory in Illinois, so it's therefore really not the first year of school. Sure, all kids pretty much go, but they really don't have to.

That said, I feel that some level of celebration for those who attend should be given--balloons, decorations, some refreshments. Someone mentioned fruit trays and juice which is nice, but honestly donut holes and water is fine too. It's just kindergarten!! And, caps and gowns is a little unecessary. Donuts, water, juice is fine!!!

I'm sure it will be a lovely day regardless of what is served in the gym.

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E.W.

answers from Chicago on

Hi Brenda,
If it is important to you and your child, then it is not a minute thing. If you can't reach an agreement with the committee, maybe plan something special with your family after the ceremony. It seems like the parents on the committee aren't really all that in to it. Kids don't stay little very long, and I see no problem with celebrating whatever milestones you want to. Have FUN! Hope things work out...
E.

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A.P.

answers from Chicago on

I have been reading the other posts...and yes it is just kindergarten, but if the school is going to do something for the kids (like a graduation) then they should do it nicely. Donut holes and water?! Why even bother. As for caps and gowns? Not sure. My daughter's pre-k class will be having a grad. ceremony, with caps and gowns. Yes it will be cute, but I find myself wondering if it is just a bit over the top. I can understand being ticked off at cheap refreshments while trying to decide on extravegant presents for the teachers. I would probably want to bring in cookies or cupcakes/cake and juice myself also. I guess if no one else wants to go that route, I would just do it anyway, otherwise it will look like a sorry attempt for a party. If they can justify having a committee for kindergarten graduation, then they should definately follow through with a good plan. Otherwise I would be thinking why even have a ceremony at all? Let's just scrap it.

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J.

answers from Chicago on

My kids' kindergarten didn't have a graduation (but the whole school has a fun end-of-year picnic, which was fine with me.)

But really, if you're going to have a graduation, it should be a celebration and it should be about the whole community of kids and their parents and teachers. That means good food! If it's donut holes and water, why bother with food at all. I think the rest of the graduation committee is lacking in imagination. If it's a money thing can you suggest a potluck - have every family bring some cupcakes or cookies? (On the other hand, you can get a big sheet cake from costco or jewel for under $40 - it seems like they should be able to scrape that together.)

Caps and gowns, on the other hand? Cute, but not really essential.

If the committee is dead-set against the cake/juice/coffee thing, you could try finding out what other schools in your area are doing. Also, if you can get a couple of other parents interested and involved maybe that will influence the others on the committee. (can you also find out what the school has done in previous years?)

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E.

answers from Chicago on

Hey Brenda;

I am on your side. There are very few firsts in the world. I am in my 30's and I remember my preschool graduation. I think you are right in wanting all the children to feel a bit special for an important accomplishment. It is only Kindergarten, but to them. This was the year they learned everything that will get them through life. How to be independent from their parents, how to share, get a long with others. Other posters on this page should consider reading, "All I really need to know I learned in Kindergarten". I don't think you are asking for too much. What is the big deal about some Juice, Cookies and paper caps (which the kids could make in the class). In my preschool graduation we had tassles on our hats, and the teacher gave out awards to every student. Best Smile, Bravist, Sweetest, Stongest, and had a nice short thing to say about each student. I am sorry, that so many Mom's feel that any achievement their child makes should be overlooked or minimized. As parents we should be proud of what our child acheives, so they know not only when we dissapprove or are disappointed in them, but when they make us proud and happy.

You stand your ground and do the best you can to make the day as special for the kids (with in reason of course).

E.

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S.A.

answers from Raleigh on

My son is graduating Kindergarten also, but I don't know what they are doing for it (though, I think I am going to contact his teacher and find out!)

Kindergarten IS a big deal - it's the first year of school - and not all kids go to pre-k first. I still remember my Kindergarten teacher and the impact her class made on the rest of my years in school (my kindergarten teacher loved kids and loved teaching - made it fun, so I liked school and learning in the years following).

I don't understand the extravagant gifts for the teachers - this is their work, that they do every year. A nice thank you card and maybe a small gift, or gift certificate ($5-10 to starbucks or maybe $20 to a local teacher supply store) would be enough, I would think (depending on what funds are available). I think the focus should be on the children - it's their only Kindergarten graduation, they wont have another one (teachers will have another one next year!). The majority of the funds should be spent on making the reception nice - some decorations and decent food service. Donut holes and water? Ick. Some people can't eat donuts (too much sugar) or dont like them - and then they have no options. A fruit & veggie tray, and maybe some appetizers (why cant the members of the committee purchase or prepare finger foods), juice, water, coffee would be a better spread than donuts holes and water.

Stand firm in your beliefs - and if the committee still wants to blow the money to give the teachers extravagant gifts (which is really just saying "look how wonderful we are, we gave you nice gifts. kids? what kids?") then do something with your child privately, after the ceremony. Maybe go out to dinner and let your child pick the restaurant, or take a trip to his/her favorite museum, or look into doing something you wouldnt normally do - a boat ride off of navy pier or something along those lines.

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J.L.

answers from Chicago on

Hi Brenda,

Being a Mom myself every milestone is important and you want to capture the moment...I agree with most of the postings that have something for your child outside of the event if the committee doesn't want to work for you. Personally, until a child GRADUATES HIGH SCHOOL, these celebrations should be kept to family. I personally find kindergarten and 8th grade graduations and yearly birthday parties for kids a little obnoxious and opportunistic for having to gift give.

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L.

answers from Chicago on

I personally am probably in the minority but I think all of these pre-school plus kindergarten graduation are ridiculous. A person graduates from high school or college not from their first introduction to organized school. I just believe graduation should be saved for true graduation.

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J.C.

answers from Chicago on

If you feel that it should be more special for your child then maybe you could plan a small graduation dinner with grandparents as well or take your child to a favorite dinner place.

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D.S.

answers from Chicago on

I agree and disagree with the other responses you've received.

It is a kindergarten graduation, so I think caps and gowns and all are a bit much.

However, if you want to make a big deal of it to make your child feel special, there's nothing wrong with that. Take your child for ice cream afterward, or make his/her favorite dinner that night. Whatever suits your comfort level.

As far as donut holes and water, I would personally take it upon myself to bring cookies or cupcakes and a fruit tray and lemonade or juice boxes or something. The last thing I would eat or would ever allow my son to eat is a donut hole. Donut holes just seem thoughtless and pointless to me. There should be a nice food service, or none at all.

I hope the event works out for you, and I do commend you for wanting to make your child feel special on a special day.

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K.

answers from Chicago on

My daughter is having a preschool graduation. They are not wearing cap and gowns but to be dressed nice. Afterwards they are having a party at the school. There will be food and refreshments,and decorations. They are not having anything extreme but fun and memorable for the kids. If you having a kindergarten graduation then it should be more than water and donut holes. We will go to dinner with family and my daughter will pick where we go.

1 mom found this helpful
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