How to Get My Son to Use Formula

when i breastfed i also decided to suplment after about 4 weeks. she took it fine the only problem i had was she wouldn't take a bottle from me. my advice is to let someone else give him the formula. i wish i could offer you more advice.

Best of Luck
S.

'M' below hit the nail on the head...
My best advice to you is GET A NEW DR!
Check out www.kellymom.com or www.mothering.com for some great 'tricks' for nurslings who wake often at night...

Edited to add:

Here is a good site too!
http://www.kellymom.com/nutrition/solids/solids-sleep.html

I just want to put my 2 cents in, because I am a rare breed who does not agree with "crying it out." What are they really learning from that? I agree with the person that said to try cereal instead, and/or you could pump your milk and give him that in a bottle instead of formula (have you ever tasted that stuff? Yuck!)
Doctors are NOT TRAINED in these things!!!!!! I can't emphasize that enough, because people automatically trust their pediatrician and they really do not have the answers, just their own opinions like anyone else. Granted, they see a lot of children and so it's a informed opinion--but on the other hand, mothers don't always tell the doctor when they ignore his/her advice so they assume that what they are telling their patients is working. For example, my pediatrician told me my 4 mo breastfeeding baby should be going 3 hours between feedings--now, EVERY SINGLE breastfeeding mother I spoke to (and that was many because I went to groups) said their baby did not go that long! So, who's right? When I questioned the doctor why no one I knew agreed with that, he admitted that he just told Moms that because it's what they wanted to hear, "they wanted the "permission" to go longer between nursings because they were tired!" And I quote!
Anyway, just follow your own instincts--they are just as valid, if not more so, than your doctor's advice!
Blessings,
Lynn

I do not mean to be disrepectful, but please know that after what you have told me about your doctor I would never take my child there again for an illness or advice! Trust your instincts - you wouldn't be asking us for advice if you were sure what your doctor said was ok. Since when it is ok to make a 9 month old so terribly upset and frantic with crying that they're reflexes force them to vomit!?!? That is not ok. Please do not do that to your child. A 9 month old has no way of understanding what you are trying to achieve by not answering his cries - he can't talk - crying is he way of saying "I need you."

The advice your doctor is giving you is outdated by about 20 years or so - I hope his methods for treating illnesses are more up to date (but I worry they are not)! I have friends who have recently finished med. school and residencies - one in family medicine - and she has flat out said that they spend virtually no time at all in med. school learning about breastfeeding and other parenting things - they are way too busy learning about illness and treating them. Unfortunately, what most doctors tell parents (there are a few good ones out there, you just have to find them) about breastfeeding and parenting is something they've picked up along the way.....not medical knowledge.

You are breastfeeding your child into his 9th month because of all the benefits he gains from breastmilk. Why introduce all the negatives of formula? I don't blame him for not liking the taste of formula - have you tasted it? It tastes just awful!

You can get great breastfeeding and parenting advice (including advice on infant sleeping) at the following websites:

www.askdrsears.com (he also has a bunch of books in bookstores that I highly recommend)

www.lalecheleague.org (if you haven't found a La Leche League chapter near you (breastfeeding support group led by moms) you can look up a chapter on their website as well as find great breastfeeding information. Ask the local LLL leader if she can recommend a pediatrician who is breastfeeding friendly (meaning they understand the proven benefits of breastfeeding and negatives of formula) - chances are that pediatrician will not give you such out-dated advice.

www.breastfeeding.com

http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/ --- Elizabeth Pantley has written several great parenting books, among them "The No-Cry Sleep Solution." Check it out.

I wish you lots of luck. My first breastfeeding child slept 10 hours at night by 6 months. My second breastfeeding child woke like yours until about 14 months. I have never found advice from pediatricians on sleeping habits to be useful (that's not what they went to school for!). Listen to other breastfeeding moms and take pride in your ability to nurish your baby and trust your parenting instincts.

Best Wishes!
J.

I agree with a couple of the other moms...Get a NEW doctor. That's just insane advice!

There is absolutely NO need to introduce formula if breastfeeding is going well. All that will do is slow your production.

Also, the "cry it out" method has no scientific backing and, in my opinion, teaches children that they can't trust their parents to come to their aid. At 9 months old, your baby still needs you when he cries. And to suggest that it's OK even if he throws up...that's just bizarre.

Even if your baby wakes up a few times throughout the night, although it stinks for you, it's perfectly normal for a 9 month old to be doing that.

A book I found useful when sleep-training my daughter is called Healthy Sleep Habits- Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth. You might want to check it out.

You do what YOU feel is best for your baby. If you aren't comfortable with his advice- Don't take it.

Sometimes you need to do things for your kids that really suck but it's totally in their best interest. Letting them cry themselves to sleep is one of those things. I did that with both of my kids and though now I miss rocking them to sleep, they both fall asleep on their own...in their own bed...with as little as a kiss goodnite. I have an 18 month old and 4 month old and they are BOTH in bed by 7:30pm and sleep until about 7:30am. I realize all kids are different, but both of mine stick to our schedule pretty well.

In order to get them to be good sleepers, you HAVE to let them cry themselves to sleep. What it does is teach them how to soothe themselves and so they don't have to rely on you to soothe them to sleep. When my 1st son was about that age my doctor told me the same thing about crying to sleep except he was on formula already. What would happen is he would wake up in the middle of the nite and we would just feed him because we thought that's what he needed. What was happening was that we were teaching him to use the bottle to put him to sleep everytime, even if he wasn't particularly hungry. Right now, unfortunately for your sleep cycle, your son associates being safe and secure with your breast. If he can associate that feeling with something that he can do like sucking his thumb or rubbing a blankie or something else, than he'll sleep 10x's better because then he can know that things are going to be okay even if you're not there.

I know it's tough...but it's just one of those things that they have to learn to do. If you stick to it, it should only be about 3-4 days before you have peaceful nites with the hubby again;)

My son is a year old now, and has never slept through the night. He's breastfed, too. Co-sleeping is sort of a touchy topic, so I'll only say that we do it and that we all get more sleep that way. The thing about breastmilk is that it digests more quickly than formula. So the breastfed babe is going to be hungry more often. One thing that really helped to get a longer stretch of sleep for us was to tank him up right before I went to bed. I have to recommend checking out kellymom.com, it has a ton of great, scientifically-supported info on breastfeeding and bf'ing issues.

Also, I'd say to check out kellymom's info on nighttime parenting. http://www.kellymom.com/parenting/sleep/index.html

Sleeping thru the night is defined as a five or six hour stretch. My son sleeps usually from about 9 pm to 3 am. and then wakes and nurses until six am. (i don't know if he's on the whole time because i go back to sleep.)

If you absolutely can not stand to have him wake, you can check out a book called 'The No-Cry Sleep solution.'

Your babe cries because they are trying to tell you something. They dont have words, all they can do is cry. There is nothing wrong with nursing your little one to sleep. It's absolutely normal for even two-year olds to wake a few times a night. Your doc shoul have no say in your parenting style, unless it is making your child ill. your babe is not sick, its normal.

ETA: advice from another pediatrician: www.askdrsears.com the sears family practices a more gentle style.

Aleisha, your pediatrician is giving out *horrible* and UNPROVEN advice... why on earth would he recommend formula if you've been successfully breastfeeding all this time?!?! I just don't get that at all. If you really want to give him a bottle before bed instead of nursing him down (completely complicating things, but even so), simply pump your breastmilk and feed it to him via bottle. Of course, nursing is a heck of a lot more natural, easier, cuddly, and healthy. As far as the formula recommendation, not only would you potentially be introducing cow's milk or soy into his diet (formulas are based off of one of those things) which could result in his having an allergic reaction and sleeping WORSE than before, but study after study has shown that "filling up a tummy" with food is NOT proven to help them sleep any better. Period. Why wouldn't your ped recommend a a bottle of expressed breastmilk and/or a small bedtime snack before going straight to formula? If I were you, I would really, really just tune out any future breastfeeding "advice" (if you can call it that) that your ped gives you - clearly, he's WAY behind the times with respect to supporting the mother/baby breastfeeding relationship.

Also, your doctor's recommendation to let him "cry it out" is just his personal opinion - NOT medical fact. I hate it when pediatricians try to pass off their personal (NON-medical) parenting opinion as medical fact. UGH. How do YOU feel about your son's nightwaking? Does it bother you to nurse him back down 3x a night? If it doesn't bother you and you and your son are find with it, then there is NO need to change it. You're being a wonderful mother to respond to his needs both at night and during the day - other babies should be as lucky as yours! :) Now, if you're feeling exhausted by the nightwaking and YOU need that to change, there are definitely gradual steps you can take to change the nighttime situation: highly recommend Elizabeth Pantley's "No Cry Sleep Solution" that you can check out of your local library for free. If you want a more aggressive approach (but not anywhere near as crazy as "sure, let him cry til he pukes!") check out Kim West's "The Sleep Lady" book.

In the end, YOU know your baby *far* better than your pediatrician - and breastfeeding and being a responsive parent at night as well as during the day? Well, these ARE very, very healthy ways to care for your son. Don't let some misinformed, behind-on-the-current-research pediatrician convince you otherwise!

At 9 months old isn't he taking solids? My kids both slept SO Much better when they were given cereal before bedtime. Depending on where he's at with his solids you could use traditional baby cereal mixed with breast milk or baby oatmeal. My kids seemed to stay more full with the oatmeal, also mixed with breast milk. I would feed them just before bed, brush their teeth/gums, and go through our bedtime routine of rocking in the chair while I sang or read to them then putting them in their cribs. If he's used to falling asleep at the breast this could cause a problem because he won't be attached at the time, but depending on your feelings on this, it may be a good time to break the habit if it is one anyways. My Pediodontist got after me for nursing my daughter in bed because of the chances of breakdown on her teeth... she's 9 now and has discolored baby teeth, who knows if it's connected or not. Anyways... I don't blame your son for not liking formula. Have you tried the stuff? Its awful! I chose feeding my children a light snack of cereal and it worked wonders.

As for crying it out, I could never stand to let my kids go to the point of getting sick. I did let them cry on several occasions and it worked very well. They self-soothed rather quickly as long as something else wasn't wrong at the time. You know your child best, personally I don't feel babies will scream their heads off for an hour for nothing. My feeling is that as long as you have set routines, for bed time, nap time, meals, clean-ups etc... the baby knows what to expect and mine never had a reason to scream for long. In fact, the only times they 'cried it out' were when something had knocked our routine out of whack. The rest of the time I really couldn't complain much. I hope you find something that works well for your little guy and get some solid rest soon.

Try only adding an ounce of formula and then increase it by an ounce every other night, that way he slowly gets used to the different taste, another problem might be what kind of formula you are using, my kids all did the best on the Nestle Good Start, it is made with whey protein like breastmilk and smells different than other formula so I would imagine it taste different too.

Do you know how much milk that your son takes before falling asleep? You might try introducing the formula & mixing them slowly until all you have is formula. My daughter is on breastmilk all day & takes 10-14oz formula before falling asleep. She has just started sleeping straight thru the night. She eats dinner about 8:30-9pm. A veggie with cereal mixed in. She's in bed by 11 & up around 9. In my opinion, the cry it out method stinks. When my son was a baby, he didn't sleep thru the night until he was about 13 months old & he was on formula. He has been a great sleeper. You know your son best & if you don't want to let him cry it out, then don't. I know that there are people who swear by it & don't think that there is any other way to get a baby to sleep on their own. But, it's completely up to you.

Try expressing breast milk and mix 3/4 breastmilk, 1/4 formula for a few nights. Then go 1/2 and 1/2 for a few days, then 1/4 and 3/4 for a few nights, eventually you will be able to do all formula for the night feeding. We did this with the oldest and due to mixing and letting him get used to the taste.

Hope it helps.
T.

My son just turned 9 months too and he's only started sleeping through the night within the last 3 weeks. They all do it at a different pace, just be patient. My doctor advised that my son would probably sleep better about the time I switched from breastfeeding to the formula, which he did. You get a better idea at how much they are eating I suppose. Just slowly wean him onto the bottle or maybe try a sippy cup.

Hi Aleisha,

I can't help you with the formula question, since I did not breastfeed my two babies, so I have no idea about that, sorry. I just wanted to say that the "letting the baby cry it out" really works. I was very sceptical myself. I tried in with my first child and she would scream until she would throw up, I was heart broken, did not like what I saw at all. So I went back to rocking her to sleep and her waking up at 3 am every single night, so at her next doctors appointment the doctor asked me how she was sleeping, and encouraged me to try the whole thing again. I did it, I would put her to bed and let her cry go in after 3 mins and assure her that everything was fine, I went in again after 5, 7, 9 min. and did the same thing until she fell asleep, she threw up every night for a few days (I think a total of 3) but after that it worked, I would put her to sleep and she would fuss a little and go to sleep. The great thing about that was that she didn't wake up in the middle of the night anymore. I totally understand the mom's that say that they don't want to do that, and hate seeing their little ones like that, but talking out of experience, it really works! Please let me know how things work out for you or if you have any questions, my e-mail is ____@____.com.

Trisha

I would get a new doctor. Lots of doctor give mother that false hope. The best thing for baby is breastmilk. The only reason that formula "fills them up" for longer is because their bodies can not process it as fast as they can breastmilk. Breast milk is always best if you nurse. He will sleep through the night when he is ready. Enjoy the feedings while you can. I have a 2 year old that I nursed and now I can barely get a hug out of her... she goes right to sleep at... all night. She started sleeping throught the night at about 1 year... maybe a bit sooner. I have a 7 month old also that is nursed. Sometime if she is having a hard time sleeping she sleeps with us. Both girls slept with us until 6 months every night, that is that only time they slept throught the night. I cherish every feeding with her because now I know how much I'll miss those moments when they are gone.

As far as crying it out. As long as I know baby is feed and dry, I wait 10 minute and then go in and pat them and reassure them it's okay and it's night night time. Then I wait another 10 mintues and do the same....next time wait 15 mintues. Try not to pick them up becuase then it becomes a game. If it goes on for to long though pick him up, calm him down and put him back in bed. It's not okay for him to throw up. Your doctor must not have children. Try getting a soothing crib toy, if you don't have one already. He'll get it.

Do what feels right for you and baby. You'll know.

Hello Aleisha. My daughter is also nine months old and breastfeed. Since she started eating table food, she has stopped sleeping all night long, which I am told is normal. As to the formula, what I did was mix the formula with breast milk. I started out with 5 oz of breast and 1 oz of formula and slowly incresed it until it was 2oz breast milk and 4 oz formula with one scoop (the same scoop that the formula comes with) of cereal. I had to do that when I was working third shift and my hubby took care of the kids at night.
I am horrible with letting my kids cry it out at night. However, when I do try to get my baby to 'cry it out' I listen to her crys. When they become very earnest I go get her, but if she is just fussy crying to be held I let her go. I am trying to break the "I have to nurse to sleep" habbit :(
Hope that helps, best of luck!

Healthy 9 month olds should be able to sleep through the night - even on breast milk. The book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" has great information and gives a few different techniques to try. The author advocates doing what feels right for you and gives you what is scientifically proven. (Crying it out HAS been shown to work - as have other methods.) It will give you good ideas on what you can expect and specific instructions for how to do it. It saved my sanity!

If you want to try formula, I'd suggest mixing it with breast milk and slowly increasing the formula and decreasing the breast milk. Good luck - 9 months of interrupted sleep can make you crazy!

As for switching doctors, go with your gut. Also, if you are happy with his medical advice and just don't like his parenting advice, listen to the medical stuff and ignore the other stuff. I don't always agree with my doctor on parenting issues, but I trust him 100% when my kids are sick. I can get parenting advice lots of places; a pediatrician with good medical advice is gold in your pocket.