8 Month Old Weened Himself

wow! the same thing happened to me one month ago and i posted the same question. same age and everything. i got some great responses if you want to read them. we worked through this with a bit of patience. anyway, i wouldn't give him the bottle. he WILL get hungry enough to breastfeed. as for you milk supply i recommend you pump after every breast feed and then use whatever milk you get to give him one bottle at the end of the day. you can also try the mothers milk tea by tradition medicinals available at new seasons or another health food store. do whatever you can to continue breastfeeding. it is so important this first year! good luck and let me know if you have more questions.

Hi A.,

Do you want him to resume breastfeeding? If so, there are several things to try. One would be spending the next several days going topless/braless around the house, lots of one on one, holding him alot, spending time in the sitting spots that you would sit for nursing, take baths together, nap and sleep together and just be totally available. Likely he will have a moment of rememberance and he will begin nursing again. Also try offering the breast while he is sleepy and/or not overly hungry. It is uncommon for babies to wean themselves before age 1 year since they are dependant on milk to survive. You may want to contact a lactation consultant to get more advice or ideas on breaking this nursing strike. Best wishes!

Sounds like a nursing strike to me! Please don't listen to the reponses saying your baby has nursed enough or how to get him to like formula- if breastfeeding and its benefits are important to you then don't give up! Your child will most likely go back to nursing if you keep pumping and keep trying.. bottles ARE easier to suck from- Portland has a strong La Leche League I'm sure, you can call them for support and ideas and even have a lactation consultant come visit you and help you back to full time nursing.. and there are a ton of great books and online resources too. Try Mothering Magazine's website, they have a whole chat site broken down into categories like nursing, diapers etc.. and you can read all sorts of other mom's experiences ( kind of like this site) anyways- good luck and keep trying!!!

I'd stop the bottle altogether and offer the breast often, in a quiet calm place. He has probably had a lot of frustration built up that he needs to release, and he may need to cry while you hold him, listen to him, and empathize with him, saying things like, "You're really upset about all the changes, I understand that was hard for you." Maybe talking to him about the trip and all the things that were stressful about it, and about the bottle. Tell him you're sorry that it's been difficult for him but that you want to reconnect with him and want him to breastfeed. If you need to pump some to keep your milk supply up, you should do that, but I still wouldn't give it to him in the bottle (you could mix the pumped breastmilk in with his food). And yes, the teething could have something to do with it. If you need help, contact La Leche League.

Same thing happened to me and my daughter when she was about 10 months old. She had been walking for a few weeks and became very independent, and then I went on an overnight business trip. I didn’t think 1 night away from the breast would make a difference because she had been taking the bottle at day care for months and still wanted to breastfeed when we got home, but it did.

It made me feel very sad and hurt, she even bit me when I removed the bottle and forced the breast. For me I just decided that it was time for both of us to move on and that made me feel a little empty. My daughter on the other hand - didn’t miss it a bit and kept moving - so it was right for her - this is what she wanted. I thought of it as her stepping towards independence and let it happen more because I felt that it was what she wanted.

We mixed formula with the pumped breast milk, and then slowly made the amount of breast milk smaller over about 2 weeks, by then she would take just normal formula. It just took a little time.

I guess you need to decide if you are ready to move on or if you want to work for more breastfeeding, and then just do it.

Once I was over the emotional bond and hormones that are produced by breastfeeding, I felt incredible and had more of the 'me' back, didn’t need to worry about leaks, breast pads or tender breasts, I could drink more than 1 glass of wine and not have to worry - etc.

It sounds like he may be on a nursing strike. "A nursing strike usually occurs between three and eight monthes when a baby who has been breastfeeding well, will suddenly refuse to nurse for no apparent reason. Some mothers wonder if their baby might be weaning, but it is very unusual for a baby to wean entirely on his own during the first year. Another factor of a "nursing strike" as opposed to natural weaning is that the baby is obviously unhappy about it. A strike usually lasts 2 to 4 days and may require some ingenuity to find the cause. Sometimes the cause is never found." This information is directly paraphrased from my breastfeeding answer book.
Some things you may try to get your little one back on the breast are increased attention and babywearing(sling, ergo, bjorn, etc), increased skin to skin contact, try nursing when he is drowsy or asleep,vary nursing positions, or offering the breast while rocking or walking him.
Here is the phone number for the Nursing Mothers of Oregon. They offer free peer counseling and support to breastfeeding mothers and Can offer further help on this matter. They can also recommend a lactation consultant which may be more useful if any medical reason for the baby not nursing is ruled out.
The number for Nursing Mothers Counsel is ###-###-####.
Be well!

i would advise you to stop giving him the bottle and when he gets hungry enough he'll figure out how to nurse again unless of course you no longer want to nurse and keep using the bottle eventualy he'lls get hungry enough to take whatever is in it 8 months is to young to get the nutrition he need from solid food and to young for cow milk so the only thing you can do is just keep trying

Call Le Leche League and get a LLL leader out to your house to help you asap. They will be trained to help you with nursing strikes and the like.

You may also want to get him a chiropractic adjustment just to be sure there is nothing making being in a nursing position hurts. Children pick up on other's attitudes towards nursing and maybe those who you were with were not too supportive?

Talk to your baby about it and explain to him you need and want him to be nursing and want his help. ( yes he can understand, people train DOGS who are younger than 8 months!)

Wishing you much success in overcoming this obstical!

I would say he didn't wean but he was or is on a nursing strike. You guys went on a trip and he has had teeth come in. If nursing is something you want to keep up, there are ways. Check out www.kellymom.com for lots of helpful advice and information to help you with what you are going through.
Best wishes,
M.

Hi A.- it sounds like a terribly difficult situation! From my experience, 8 months is early to self wean, but I've heard stories. Will he latch on? How often are you trying to put him to the breast? How important is it to you to continue nursing him? At 8 months, he's gotten a lot of your good stuff, forming a strong foundation for his immune system and gut flora. However, ideally, he'd still nurse for a while. That time is up to you both to figure out, though, and no one else can tell you what's right and wrong for you and your baby. I'd suggest really thinking and feeling on that question about your hopes and dedication at this point. If you could go either way, then perhaps following his lead would be the simplest. If it's really important to you to have tried everything that you could have to prolong the breastfeeding relationship with him, then I'd seek professional help TOMORROW from Beyond Birth Lactation Services. They're great, and will take the time and consideration to look at your individual situation to evaluate what may be going on and provide a thorough plan with you to try, and then follow-up. I nursed my 3 children, all with very different experiences, but all some of the most cherished times of my parenting. Best wished to you both on your journey~
M., Certified Professional Midwife

It sounds like a nursing strike to me. From what I understand, 8 month olds don't just up and wean, but they do sometimes go on nursing strikes (which can certainly seem like weaning, but is not).

Please get in touch with a La Leche League leader in your area. She should be able to help you out. I haven't had any personal experience with nursing strikes, but I have friends who have successfully nursed again after one :)

Best wishes!
~B.

ETA - in the meantime - pump, pump, pump to keep your supply up! Your supply shouldn't be depleting much, if at all, if you're pumping on a very regular basis.

I've been going through something similar with my daughter. What's helped me is, pump pump pump for like a week to get your supply back up. Keep offering the breast to baby but add pump sessions after each feeding and at night. And drink lots of fluids. Then, if the baby is still taking the bottle, only use the number one nipples. That's what I do with my daughter. Other wise if you use the big o'l nipples, they will not want the breast because it's too much work. My daughter did not take the bottle till she was around 9 months old. She still will not take formula so I'm in the same boat as you. My daughter sleeps for like 14 hours at night and was down to feeding only twice per day so my milk supply had drastically declined. I got it going again by all the pumping so she wants to nurse again. SHe didn't want to nurse because I didn't have much milk anymore. This could also be your problem.
Just keep offering the breast and also, try at night. They are sleepy and will nurse much easier. I wake my daugter around 5am to feed.
The other thing is, your baby might be taking in too much food each day and not want the milk because they are not hungry. that happened with us. I got back on track and make sure she's getting the (24oz-32oz of milk per day that's required for her age). I always offer milk first, then food. She had been eating so much she stopped drinking much milk.
Hope this helps.
take care.

my son self weened at 9 months on a camping trip. there was just too much going on to sit still for 20 min and nurse. He was down to just 2 feedings a day by then though due to his 8 teeth.
My daughter however, never nursed. I tried for a month, pumping and feeding her while trying to get her to just take it from the breast. We had to switch to formula because it was taking too much time away from my toddler. SO, heres how I did it. Mix in a little formula (1oz to 3oz breastmilk) for a 3-5 days, then add a little more formula, less milk. Little by little you switch it out. It takes a few days for them to adjust to the new taste so dont rush it. If you want to keep pumping till you dry up you wont have to worry about engorgement (That was nice). He got some good stuff in those 8 months, and if he is an active child like mine, he probubly doesnt like the extra time and effort in nursing so dont worry a bit about it. I once saw an old baby book from the 60/70's and in the back was a recipe for formula, back then nursing was getting a bad rap and alot of moms opted out. The formula was mostly evaporated milk and sugar! Those babies gew up to be our parents/us/siblings so I am sure our little babes with all the added nutrients are going to be just fine.

Hi - I have a 12 year old and an 8 month old. Unless you want to wean him, I would definitely contact a lactation specialist right away. My 12 year old "weaned me," in other words, I didn't want to stop nursing her at 9 months because I started working part-time and my mother started supplementing her milk with formula. Thus, my milk supply decreased. I know better now and know that there are experts out there to help with any kind of breast feeding complication. Good luck!

Your son has not weened himself. He still wants breast milk. He's objecting to nursing but he still has a bottle. Weening means that the baby drinks cow's milk from a sippy cup.

If you want to continue to breast feed, which I think might be a good idea at this age, I'd also suggest that you do things to increase your milk production. And that you only feed him from the breast. When he gets hungry he'll eat. At the same time you're doing this be as calm and emotionally involved as possible. He may be reacting to the emotional change in the environment and now he's having to adjust back again.

It sounds to me that he had difficulty going to a different environment. Some babies have more difficulty with change than others. And if Mom is anxious about what is happening then baby will be too.

If you want to stop breast feeding than gradually reduce the amount of breast milk in each bottle. Be sure to give him formula rather than cow's milk. Cow's milk is difficult to digest. Pediatricians recommend not giving cow's milk until the baby is at least 12 months old. And once you start cow's milk it should be whole milk. Babies need much more fat than adults in order to develop their brain.

My best advice is to work on a way to remain calm, make a decision and stick to it in a calm quiet manner. No baby ever starved to death when food was available. Make your breast or the bottle available. One or the other and allow him to choose when he's going to eat. He will eat eventually.

Moving back and forth between bottle and breast is confusing and probably frustrating to him. Most babies prefer routine. Because he's shown a preference for breast milk I would continue breast feeding him if you're comfortable doing that.

It sounds to me that he's confused by being given the bottle while you were away. And...it is easier and the action is different when sucking from a bottle. It's too bad the hospital person recommended drying up your milk and switching to a bottle if you wanted to continue breast feeding. Calling the LeLeche League is excellent advice.

Please continue breastfeeding! I, too, recommend Traditional Medicinals nursing tea, La Leche League, and lots of close contact with baby. Nursing isn't always easy, but you'll treasure it forever, and you'll know you did the right thing!

This happened to me but it was because my husband and I went on vacation and I came back after 4 days and he didn't want to breastfed. I just kept pumping and trying to breastfed him. If you keep giving him bottles then he won't go back to nursing. I know it seems mean but if he is hungry enough he will eventually nurse. I had many days of crying about my situation and eventually they will nurse if they are hungry enough. Also what helps if you go into a room with no distractions and the lights dimmed low. Keep pumping and I had to take herbal supplements to help my milk production during this time. Hang in there and be strong because believe me it is hard and they will get back to it.

Another vote for La Leche League, they helped me learn to nurse, & what to expect.

If you are offering a bottle, he'll take the easy road, but he wants momma milk. So by only offering the breast, he'll be more motivated to get back on the breast. They will help you iron out what you want & what he want, & bring back harmony.
Happy nursings.

Ang

I'm with the "keep trying to continue breastfeeding" crowd, A.. I just want to add that if you're having trouble getting a letdown reflex with your pump, try the Avent hand pump. It's so effective in eliciting letdown that you won't mind that it's not automated, although I do think they make an electric version.....too much money for a solution to a temporary problem.

Keep up the good work Mama!

D. T

A.,

My son weaned himself at eight months too. We didn't go visiting or anything, he just decided enough was enough and he wanted the "real" food, not Mom's liquid diet. When it became a fight to even get him to my breast to nurse for even 5 minutes I gave up. He never did take a bottle, we had to transition him to sippy cups. The Gerber brand cup worked okay, but the handles are on the cup, not the lid and it's sometimes hard to get everything lined up the right way. The other problem we had was that he'd chew the plug out of the spout then start flinging whatever was in the cup around. We eventually switched to a Playtex brand where the spout wasn't so soft, and the handles were on the lid.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

I have 2 children that went through that. The first one had to go without breastmilk for a couple weeks because I had some medical problems. With your sons age he might be at an age that he just wants more to eat. My youngest started eating baby cereal with his formula when he was about 6-7 months. I could never tell his doctor or the WIC people, or they would just tell me that I was wrong. When they start not wanting to breastfeed, that usually means that they are not getting enough with formula or breastmilk. The best baby cereal is the rice. They like it alot and then will move onto the other types of cereal that there is out there.

Hang in there. Babies have been known to go on "nursing strikes" so if you're patient he may go back to nursing. You may be able to get your milk supply back up by taking milk-boosting herbs (like in tea form) or a drug called Domperidone that has, apparently, very few side effects and can boost milk production very quickly. I believe it has to be prescribed by a doctor. Good luck.

I see that as normal progression...time to start working with a sippy ( big boy )cup!
Remember all those moms saying " they grow so quickly!" he is moving on to the next phase...soon he'll be walking!

Did you drive over mountains or fly? Or was there a big change in sea levels? I would take him in to get check for an ear infection.
My little one was very sensitive to our elevation and when ever it changed to much she would have issues with her ears. Laying down to nurse would hurt.
Hang in there!
Bev

My daughter did the same thing at 4 months old and she would only eat in a room where we were alone and the lights were off and no noise, I did not let her eat from a bottle during this time she went hungry till she was ready to breastfeed, I gave her the breast every hour or so and let her try, it took almost a day before she was ready to eat but when she did it did not take long before she was eating like normal again. Dont stress that only makes it worse be relaxed and calm even if you have to fake it.

Your baby is probably on a nursing strike. Keep trying to nurse and pump. Wean him slowly off the formula. You should be able to nurse for as long as you want. You can also go to La Leche League's website to get more information on nursing strikes.

You can do it!
Christin

I was breastfeeding my daughter too when I went down to visit my folks. She was 11 months old. She was eating table food and then breastfeeding after. The morning I got down to my folks she refused to breasfeed. I thought is was the change in timezones, unfamiliar home, etc. At lunch she ate, but refused to breastfeed. Dinner was the same thing. By then my breast were so full and hurting. The next morning I called the hospital (so happened this was the hospital my daughter was born in). He told me if I could make to the 3rd day without breastfeeding that my milk would start to dry up otherwise come in and they would give me a shot to start drying up my milk. It was a painful 3 days.

I had never bought baby food but fixed whatever we were eating but without seasonings for her (I started with the oatmeal rings and 100% juice watered down), so when my Mom suggested giving her our milk I was OK with that. Luckily my folks had 2% milk in the house, I gave her a bit of that and she drank it with no problem. When we got home I had to go out and buy 2% as I only drank whole milk. What I change for me.

I hope that helps. E.

i would recommend slowly decreasing the amount of breast milk in each bottle. Like this week do half and half, then next week 3/4 formula 1/4 breast milk, then maybe 7 oz formula to 1 oz breastmilk. Then the week after that just formula. He will slowly get used to the taste of mostly formula bottles.

Personally, I would call a La Leche Leader first.

http://www.lllusa.org/web/SalemOR.html

A.,
This does sound more like a nursing strike. The change of routine can sometimes cause this. They don't have to last long. It is also common for 8 month olds to act like they are weaning because they are more interested in the world around them and easily disctracted. This phase typically lasts a few weeks to a month and if you can weather it he will continue nursing. In either case there are some things you can do to help get back to regular nursing and not need to supplementbefore your supply goes away.

I am a La Leche League leader and many moms run in to this challenge. You can reach a volunteer La Leche League leader on call in the Sesattle area by calling ###-###-####. I encourage you to do so asap. They really can help.

C.

I remember reading somewhere in my expanding library on parenting that teething can exacerbate any nursing strike-type behaviors because the way babies nurse can hurt their gums when teeth are coming in. I would recommend continuing to pump to keep your milk supply up and continuing to try and get him to nurse. If you aren't quite ready to go in to see your pediatrician, it might be worth it to at least place a call to see if he/she has any ideas on how to continue breast feeding or what should be done if the baby is trying to self-ween.

Good luck!

My son weened himself from me at two months. I still had quite a bit of breastmilk too. I just believe with my son, I wasn't giving him enough. Although, I didn't have any probs with him taking on formula, I did have to gradually take him off breast and place him on all forumla. You could try rice cereal in his bottle...just a bit. Not too much. :D

Hey there.
Have you tried lots of skin to skin together? I would try when he is tired and maybe try snuggling for a while skin to skin laying down and see if he will latch on. Good luck!

A.-
I have experienced the exact problem! My daughter is 7 months. I went back to school 4 nights out of the week - since she was born I have only been gone 1 night out of the week - my husband has always given her breast milk I have pumped and froze. After the first week of school she refused to take the breast. She wasn't getting enough so eventually I had to do the same thing and supplement her 1/2 formula 1/2 breast milk from a bottle. As it turned out I did loose my milk because she was refusing to feed from me entirely. I, however, developed another problem at the same time, I wouldn't let-down for the pump. As I watched her I began to recognize she perfered the bottle. She no longer wanted me! It hurt my feelers for a while - honestly it still does and its been almost 2 months. I do however still nurse her first thing in the morning and a little during the day if she wants it. As well as at night before bed. But really its up to her. I can't make her. She definetly does not get enough from me, so her primary source is formula now. I know its hard. Keep trying. But remember what is important for your son. I got a lot of support and tried to remember that I breast fed as long as I could. She just is a little independent soul! Great job for going 8 months! Be proud of yourself!
-A.

Have you tried starting out giving him a bottle, but only with half the amount and then have him finish on the breast? Sometimes this helps with my daughter especially when she is really hungry or very distracted. Hang in there and I hope everything works out!

If he won't take the formula alone, I'd offer him only formula in the bottles and then he could only get the breastmilk in the breast. He'll figure it out pretty quick. It's amazing how sharp they are this young.

This happened to me with my firstborn - a son 26 years ago! It was during and after a move from Maine to Oklahoma and so there were quite a few times that he was given a bottle - sometimes with breastmilk, sometimes, not. He started to prefer the bottle. Many told me that it was easier for them to suck from a bottle than the breast - I'm sure that if I stuck with it, I could have gotten him back to breast had I had the support and probably if I'd asked for it! I just gave in and started giving him formula instead - he was 4 months old. He had a few more ear infections, etc. than his younger sisters who I breast fed until they were 10 and 14 months, but he thrived! If it is so stressful for you - it was for me - it is not the end of the world if you switch. He has had a good number of months with breastmilk, he will be fine, if you switch to formula.

I would imagine you're feeling a little anxious when you attempt to nurse, maybe he feels that as well and can't relax to latch on. Don't give up, make it a quiet time and talk or sing softly to him. It might help him to calm down. Keep pumping, that will keep your milk supply up - it's all about supply and demand. Good luck.
E.

I also had a daughter who weened herself at 7mo.The Dr put her on soy milk;she refused it;then he tried goats milk;she accepted and as luck would have, we lived near a goat farm.She is now a 52yr old grandmother of 6.Apparently the 2 teeth she had cut had negative responses to the breast milk. It is a whole different blend than other milks.My other 5 children had no problems like this and were weened at 10 to 14mos.
I hope this helps you.
C. M Hamlin
Cave Junction,OR

Sounds like a nursing strike to me. Look up information online regarding nursing strike. But absolutely get some outside help...La Leche or a lactation specialist. Good luck and do not give up! There are herbs you can take to keep your milk supply up. Go to New Seasons and they will help you find the right one.

Keep on pumping, keep on pumping. With the Medela breast pump I was able to increase milk production. This pump will actually pump out of both breasts at the same time. Yes, it's time consuming, but breast milk is the only thing that has all of the nutrition that the body and brain of a baby need. Studies have shown that breast feeding benefits the child mentally - up to 2 years! Try to get him back on the breast in between bottle feedings.

Another thing to think about. Did you use a new cologne? new laundry soap? I'm wondering if your smell changed, and he doesn't like the new smell? Did you change your diet - so he doesn't like what he's being "served"?

Trips are very hard on little ones. I got back a month ago from a trip to arizona. My baby was 9 months at the time and getting 4 teeth in at once on the top. She only wanted to nurse. Did not want solid food at all. I was very very tired, she cried all night long every night. Plus i had to other children with me and no husband. After we got back and into a routine,. She is better.

Do you give hime yogart/juice drink in those little gerber size 4oz. Bottles. Maybe try that with some formula to make it taste better. My daughter loves them.

I had the same experience with my first son, when he was 9mo. Went on a long trip, came home, wouldn't nurse. We kept it up until he was 1yo but it was not easy. We mainly just nursed at naps, bed and first thing in the morning, which seemed to be enough for him, plus he ate food too. If you still have milk, you can try what I did. This sounds mean, but I would let him get really hungry, like crying hungry and then he was more willing to nurse then after that I would offer food. Or if he was really sleepy, or already sleeping he would nurse.
You can give a baby a boob, but you can't make him nurse.
Kids are crazy, but you can do it!
Feel free to email me, and hopefully this was at least a little encouraging. Good luck!