How Long Should It Take for a 2 Yr Old to Go to Sleep??

We've encountered going to sleep issues with our 2 yr old too. He went from totally peaceful bedtimes to crying, back to peacefulness, etc. Now at 2 1/2 he's back to peaceful and we're soo glad!
I'd suggest finding a way to "wean" him off your presence at bed time. You'll really enjoy his ability to go to sleep independently once you have the new baby (actually, you'll NEED him to do it independently!). Check out the book "Good night, sleep tight" by Kim West.
Also, you might bring in a baby gate to keep him in his room. You're at a good place to begin implementing the last phase of sleep independence in the book, which is "job checks" after you put him to bed. Rather than sit outside his door (which is part of her method, so you're right on track), tell him you'll come back and check on him after you do something. We do this with our son and it has worked like a charm to keep him in his room after bed time (he also falls asleep with the door open, then we close it when he's aslepp). I leave and say "I need to brush my teeth, I'll check on you when I'm done," then go brush your teeth, then poke your head in and say "I'm checking on you, are you ok?"
Then you might fold some laundry, then take a break in 5 min, etc.
I've gradually increased the "check-in" times to where I don't check in for 20 or 30 minutes. Long enough to take a shower of have a chat with my husband.
This way, if it takes an hour for him to fall asleep, I haven't lost an hour to nothing but waiting and waiting.

At first he did have trouble staying in his room, which is why we used the baby gate. I told him I'd leave the gate down when he could stay in his room. We would start the process with no gate and say, "It's bed time, you need to stay in your room. If you come out, I'll put the gate up." He tested that our for a few weeks or so. He got really mad about the gate every time, but we said "I'm sorry, I have to put the gate up when you come out" and stuck to it and now he stays in his room and the gate just leans against the wall in the hallway as a reminder for him.
About half-way through this process we started asking him if he wanted the gate on or off. Of course he'd say "I want it off!" so we'd say, "I will leave it off if you stay in your room." It was sort of a positive twist on our earlier statement, and he was ready to try to comply. He had a few more instances where he pooped out of the room, but that's all.
Also, we decided in the begninning that his room would be the boundary rather than his bed. Now he might get down and come to the doorway, or get a toy or a book, but he always gets back on his bed to go to sleep.

We've been having the same issues with our 2 year old! It seems like this may just be a stage they go through around this age. Our little guy learned to climb over his gate... so that didn't work for long.

The thing that has worked for us the past few nights (and it's similar to a suggestion below)... is to sit in there with him for a few minutes... read him a story and love on him a bit... then tell him "I'll be right back"... I leave and get a few things done.. then I go back in and check on him... sit down for just a few seconds and say again "I'll be right back." I usually only have to go in there once or twice before he's out. A couple of times he's stayed up for a bit and I can hear him talking.. but when I peek in on him, he's laying in his bed.

It has made things a LOT easier on all of us. So my husband and I get to spend a bit of time together while our little guy gets himself to sleep.

Good Luck!

-A.

Is the asthma medicine albuterol? If so, that can be stimulating to some folks. I use it myself occasionally and it definitely has a stimulating effect on me as it can speed up heart rate, etc. You might talk to the doctor and do that earlier in the evening. And, if it's not albuterol, I would still suggest you look up or ask the doctor if it can be stimulating.

Hi S.,
Well, you definitely are committed and I commend you on your drive to do the best you can. I would recommend two things:
1. Cut out all television hours before bed. Computers, TV, etc. are VERY stimulating and the brain processes those images for hours. That is the first thing I would do. One parent I told this to, unplugged it (it was in the kids room) and told him it broke. That was the end of any fits.
2. Look into Love and Logic. I say this not because you are not good parents...sounds like you are awesome. I say this so that you will take care of yourself, especially before number 2 comes along. L&L will give you strategies to put the consequences and accountability on the child, and relieve you of that burden. It works with my two year old like a charm. When I stray....I pay for it. You seem very proactive and I think you will find their advise and theory very positive and something that will prepare your child for his future.

Keep up the good work, but be gracious with yourself. You are trying too hard I think. My two year old wants her door open too. I told her one time, "I will leave your door open as long as you stay in bed." Then the first time she got out of bed, the door was closed. You may have a couple of rough nights, but he is two and is much smarter than given credit (well at least I did not give mine as much credit as I should have.) Now when I lay her down, I ask "you want your door open or closed." She usually says, "door open. I stay in bed or mommy closes the door." It took just a couple of times to show her in actions, not words, and now it is a non-issue.

www.loveandlogic.com
There are books, DVD's, seminars, etc. If you have any questions let me know....I truly love their material. I am a work in progress with the mind shift, but I see the value in it for my kids, so I am willing to meet the challenge.

My son just turned 28 months and has had his share of sleeping problems mostly because of the inconsistancy coming from his dad/grandparents when he is there during his visitation. He is doing much better now and this is the schedule/routine that I have been doing for about a year in a half or so.

At 5-5:30 dinner, then 15 min of tv, while i clean up, bath, read books and sing 2-3 songs and prayer then I put him to bed with a book or 2 for about 15 min, say night night to all his friends(pooh, tiger #1-3,shammo, baby, blankets,night night, go to sleep and I love you, kiss kiss, put his cd on and turn of the lights and close the door. He is usually asleep anywhere between seconds to 20 min max.

Just a thought: The tv might be stimulating him too much before bed time. Is he releasing enough energy during the day?

I hope this help.
Good Luck
M.

I am not by any means an expert in this field. I think some of us just have kids who sleep well, and go to sleep fast and some that do not. My child seems to be asleep within minutes of hitting the pillow, but every child is different. Just curious, what's the significance of the 10 minutes of tv time before bed time. That might be over stimulating him? I have heard for my own self who has has difficulty sleeping that any tv or computer time before bed is bad because the lights/blue ray lights emitted can make sleep time more difficult. So, not sure whether you want to give that a try and see if that helps? It might be worth a consideration? I think your principles of a regular routine with books/prayers/singing, etc before bedtime are the best practices to adopt. And if it takes him 10-15 minutes to finally close those eyes, that is okay.....too (As long as he knows to remain in bed, and have quiet time if he can't immediately fall asleep - I think the quiet time, than gears him up for knowing that its lights out now...)
Best of luck, K.

My 26 month old goes down around 7:45. He's been sleeping in his big boy bed for about 2 weeks now. Some nights he is out like a light and other nights we'll hear him chatting to himself up to 1-2 hours after bedtime. Lucky for us he does not leave his bed on these occasions. We have been lucky that way, so far.

You got some great advice from ladies already and I especially agree with what Maggie had to say! Sounds like you need to break him of the habit of having you hang around. I thought I'd add that I know someone who had to use two gates. If your son is a climber, like this little boy I know, thought it might be helpful to know you can stack them if needed. Of course, test that one out for saftey. I'm not sure how they did it...

If the asthma med is Flovent, we use that too and have no problems with bedtime. The albuterol / Xopenex would be another story, however, like another mom said. Not great for a calming routine. Could you move TV time to before bath -unless of course you are giving albuterol / Xopenex and that is why the TV is used - so he'll sit still. Is that right???? If so, can you administer that med earlier in the evening?

My last thought would be how much sleep does he get, over all, in a day? I think many kids don't get enough, so by bedtime they are overstimulated and it's harder to settle them. As we've heard a million times, each kid is different and has different needs, but I would say if he is not getting 12-14 hours of sleep a day (including nap), you might try pushing bedtime a little earlier before he gets too wound up. A book I like for sleep training (of all ages) is Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child by Marc Weissbluth.