How Do I Safely Co-sleep with My 4 Week Old?

Updated on November 28, 2010
S.J. asks from Cherryville, MO
17 answers

My 4 week old sleeps in 2-3 hour chunks during the day, but at night is up every hour feeding. Quite a few moms have suggested co-sleeping to make baby feel more secure, be able to feed easier when it is frequent, etc. How can I co-sleep safely? (baby is currently in bassinet right next to bed)

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T.B.

answers from Chicago on

You can get a co-sleeper, if you are worried. Arm's Reach makes one that connects to your bed, but allows you easy access to baby. You'd be surprised how aware of your baby you actually are. But, if you are concerned, you can get a sleep positioner for the baby. It keeps them from rolling over, and can keep you from rolling on them (should that happen), as it provides a "hill" between you and the baby. Personally, my baby has always slept under my arm. I nurse him on one side, then roll him over me to the other side so he can nurse on the other side. It also helps me feel more comfortable as I tend to move a lot when I sleep.

Does that help?
T.

2 moms found this helpful

A.A.

answers from Lubbock on

my daughter is almost three months, and she's been sleeping next to me since she was about two or three weeks. she didn't sleep well alone, but once she started sleeping with me it has been MUCH easier. she sleeps through the whole night and in the morning i can sleep in and just nurse her in bed. i don't use anything (like a co-sleeper), i just nestle her up under my arm next to my boobie =) i was a heavy sleeper before, but suprisingly not since having her! I know some doctors try to scare you about it.. but i think it's okay.
best of luck!

2 moms found this helpful

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Okay, you can sleep next to your baby and nothing will ever happen. Or, you can sleep next to your baby and you could stuffocate her. Or, you can sleep next to your baby and your husband could roll over on her. So many different things could happen!
I slept, with my first, and it was a nightmare after a while. He stayed in bed with us for almost 2 years. Yes, it was great to have him next to me, I loved cuddling with him. I loved having him next to me. I loved being able to nurse him whenever! But, I did not LOVE having my husband THROW our covers all over the room screaching, "where's the baby? WHERE"S THE BABY?" because he was terrified that he had rolled over on him (he was in my arms).
With my second I made a conscious effort to keep him in his own space, but close by so I could still nurse him. I would sit up, cuz it's harder to sleep when you are sitting, nurse him and then put him back in his crib right next to our bed. He was sleeping through the night at 6 weeks!!! YEAH!
I am about ready to have our third child, a daughter. I have purchased a moses basket so that she can still sleep in our bed, but have her own space and not have to worry about rolling over on her. I am thrilled! That way I can still nurse her, she will be super close, and we can still have our own space.
Your baby is probably hitting a growth spurt right now. I know how hard that is. It should calm down in a couple of days (maybe a week). I say, keep her in the bassinet.
L.

2 moms found this helpful

J.P.

answers from Lewiston on

There are a couple different options... there are pack & plays that attatch to the side of your bed and then there is a small portable bassinet that goes right in your bed. I had my daughter sleep in a bassinet right beside my bed.

1 mom found this helpful
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R.Y.

answers from New York on

I always had the crib next to my bed so it worked okay to just put the baby back in the crib. My second one is still in my room and she is 2 next month. I am a restless sleeper so co-sleeping in the same bed was just not for me. Lots of people love it though. I would say don't do it if you have alcohol or any sedating drug in your system.

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K.P.

answers from Seattle on

Yes, co-sleeping is much easier way to go. It makes your little love feel secure being next to you and to the milk. And is easier for you too to get more sleep as well just being able to "plug baby in" when baby starts to wake.
Dont be too worried about co sleeping, many people think that you will roll over on the baby, but it is pretty hard to. You are consciously aware when you are sleeping with the baby. You feel their every move, breath, wiggle etc. And they know and feel yours.
It is a wonderful thing being able to snuggle with them at nightime, and you will both be more rested for being able to sleep next to each other.

1 mom found this helpful

J.L.

answers from Los Angeles on

I had to co-sleep because I traveled a lot with her the first year. We received what I called a "box". It had three walls and a little cushion that folded out. It's sort of hard to explain. They found it at babies r us I think, but I would put that in the corner of the bed (our bed was pushed against a wall) and thats where she slept. If I turned over I would hit the box part and not roll on her (which is what I was most afraid of). Good Luck!

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H.A.

answers from Dallas on

Co-sleeping is definitely not for everyone.. but I've done it with all four kids during the early part of breast feeding. I also keep a bassinet by my bed. I have slept with my kids on my bare chest, with me on my back. I've slept with them in the crook of my arm. Contrary to what others say I actually sleep much better with the baby near me then when I use the bassinet. When he is in the bassinet I find I am listening for every little noise, every peep. I don't sleep well. When he's next to me, it feels so natural. I relax and sleep but I don't move. I hold my baby and sleep. This is definitely not for everyone. My husband can't do it - for instance. He doesn't wake up when the baby cries, he doesn't have that baby sense that I seem to have. My husband (lucky dog) sleeps like the dead.

Anyway, don't let someone pressure you to co-sleep, or NOT to co-sleep. Do what feels right to you. Just for your info - that night feeding stuff can be pretty normal. My three week old does the "frenzy" cluster feeding too. It helps build up your supply, and it won't go on forever. But I *am* co-sleeping and he still does it.

Something you might look for -- There is a bassinet called the "arms reach co sleeper" which is a nice compromise. It comes up to level with your bed, but gives the baby it's own space. So the baby is right along side you and easy to reach for nursing. You might look on Craigslist in your area and see if you can find a nice used one. :) If not, I know Babies R Us in our area carries them.

Good luck - whatever you decide. I sympathize! I am up nursing right now. LOL. :)

1 mom found this helpful

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

My daughter always slept in the nook of my shoulder meeting my body with my arm curled protectively over her. When she needed to nurse, I'd turn on my side, allow her to nurse, then placed her back in the crook of my shoulder.

Most Moms will start being a light sleeper after a baby, but not sure about the Dads.

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F.O.

answers from Boston on

I would say be aware of your sleep habits. You won't go into deep sleep pattern because you will be preoccupied thinking about the baby's safety anyway. So, that will give you a chance to see what works and what doesn't.

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S.B.

answers from Kansas City on

You can buy a co-sleeper at various outlets. I would check with Burlington Coat Factory first. They are inexpensive (compared to others) and you can order Baby Depot items on line. There are different kinds of co-sleepers. You can get on that goes in your bed, one that attaches to the side of your bed or even one that sits next to your bed and opens up up to your bed. You'll have to decide which style is best for you. I didn't do any of this. Until she was about 3 months old, my daughter just slept right between my husband and I. In the beginning there was some concern that one of us might roll over on her, but I found that I was very tuned in to her. I guess it's a mother thing. If she passed gas, I was aware-no matter how deeply I was sleeping. At 3 months she began to sleep for longer periods throughout the night so, like you, I put her bassinet right next to my side of the bed and that's where she slept. At about 6 months, she moved to her baby bed which stayed in our room until she was about 18 months, then she moved to her own room where she happily resides to this day. Good luck.

H.W.

answers from Albany on

I've been co-sleeping since my baby was a few weeks old. It's made life sooooo much easier!! She pretty much stays asleep once I start to feed her.

I have the bassinet right next to the bed but with like, a pillow or rolled up small blanket blocking up the gap. I sleep between baby and husband, but swap sides as I need to swap feeding sides. My husband is pretty good at not rolling into the middle if she is there, but if you aren' sure (I wasn't for awhile) then just feed off the one side during the night. It didn't effect our breastfeeding at all.
If you're worried about you rolling onto her, put a rolled up towel/blanket between you and baby while you sleep. But after I've put my baby on the breast, I fall asleep again. Sometimes I can't even remember feeding her!

During the early days, I had a towel underneath us to catch all the milk that didn't make it to her mouth.

Now that she's got a pattern, I stay up until I've just fed her (usually around midnight) and she sleeps in the bassinet until her first feed and I just pick her up, lie her down and put her on.

Enjoy it! I'm so very glad that I made that decision. I hope it works out for you :)

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L.O.

answers from Detroit on

I slept with both of my babies until they wer e6 months old.. we have a king size bed.. hubby moved down the hall to get his beauty sleep..I put a bed rail on one side of the bed.. put hte baby on 1/2 the bed near the headboard adn teh bed rail.. I slept on the other half of the bed.. I had 1 pillow and 1 small blanket... (less to fall on and smother baby). I thought it was a good night sleep if I never had to get out of bed all night.. just half woke up and nursed the baby and then back to sleep for both of us..

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J.C.

answers from San Francisco on

Similar to below, we have a cal. King so their is plenty of room for three. When my daughter was an infant I had a bedrail on one side of the bed and she slept next to it. I Rolled up a small blanket next to her so she wouldn't roll towards the middle of the bed when she was little, but once she grew stronger I stopped doing that. I recently saw some co sleeping things with small sides for the baby to be in, that looked pretty good! Just make sure the baby is not right next to where your pillows are, I always put my daughter about a foot lower than the pillow, and she slept with her own blanket, or blanket sleeper until she seemed strong enough to move away of blankets in her face. She still sleeps with us, it is the most precious thing to have your child sleep with you. And they feel so secure knowing that mommy and daddy are right there!
Mine just turned 2 and when she is falling asleep she wraps her little arm around my neck and if she wakes in the night she just scoots right next to me and falls back asleep.

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K.G.

answers from Fort Wayne on

We co-slept till about 2 months old. we had a Sleep Nook that (babies r us) was in between us. She wiggled her way down at the 2 month mark and I was not comfortable after that point having her sleep with us. But the 2 months she did sleep with us was wonderful. I did bring her to bed with us to feed at night and put her back in the crib. To this day if she gets up during the night I will bring her in bed with us til she falls back asleep. gl.

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T.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

I always put a guard rail on my side of the bed and let the baby sleep on that side of me, away from where my husband is. That helps all of us sleep better. I might nurse on the other side, but always move the baby back over to the other side for sleeping. Also, one of the benefits of co-sleeping is that the baby will usually mimic your breathing rhythm, helping regulate their breathing. It's amazing how beautifully it all works together!

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K.S.

answers from Columbus on

I'm a couple days late, but wanted to throw in my 2 cents. We co-slept with our daughter more out of necessity-she didn't sleep well in her own bed & I don't believe in CIO of any form. In the beginning, I used the boppy pillow between us. That too was more out of necessity because she would spit up (projectile) if she was laid down too soon after eating. But, it was great because it was always a little barrier for my husband who is a deep sleeper. Once she started scooting out of it, we just got rid of it. Now, at 4, she starts off in her own bed & more often than not will come to us around 2 or 3. It really is great having that small warm body there.

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