Help with Sleeping

Hi D. C,

I had the same problem with my granddaughter. I invested in a sleepsystem that really made a difference. If you are interested in learning more let me know.

Good luck.

N. Marie
____@____.com

Perhaps you can edit your request to give a little more detail about your son's daily schedule/routine. You will get some generic recommendations with the current info you have provided, but we can be a lot more specific if there is more transparency.
I am a huge Weissbluth fan myself, and had a similar situation when my daughter was the same age a couple of months ago. I BF'd her for both feedings but made sure that there was only dim light on when I changed her diaper beforehand. When I actually fed her, I turned the light off first. During the entire process, I did not make eye contact with her and barely, if ever spoke; then too, it was in very hushed tones. Another thing that helped was to put her in an overnight diaper. My daughter is very sensitive to a wet diaper and the "Overnights" helped her feel dry all night.
Hope this helps.

GL

You didn't say if you are nursing are not or what time your son goes to sleep at night. I have 2 kids and both have been good sleepers. I think the key is an early bedtime and not nursing them to sleep, because when they wake up they don't know how to soothe themselves. Try doing the last feeding about 30 minutes before bed and then putting him to bed semi awake and he may cry for a few days, but if you can bare it then he will eventually learn to soothe himself. When he wakes up try having your husband give him a pacifier and rock him to sleep without feeding him. At 6 months and 18 pounds he doesn't need to eat at night. My 4 month old breastfed child can sleep 11 hours without eating at night. Good Luck and just keep trying different things until it works.

I think the first place to start is to eliminate the night feedings. You can do it gradually, say starting with the 4am one, and just feed him a little less each time - either ounce-wise if you're bottle feeding or time-wise if you're breastfeeding. The idea is that they gradually get used to less and then hopefully don't wake up at all for that feeding. If he does wake up, then you have to be consistent and not feed him - otherwise you're undoing all the work you did to get there. You can go in after 5-10 minutes of crying - sometimes they can soothe themselves right back to sleep and are not even fully awake so give him some time - then pat him, hold him a bit, then put him back down with a "time for sleep, good night". Keep it short and sweet and not much talking, interaction, unless of course you sense something is wrong like he has a fever or is really teething and needs some tylenol. If you're breastfeeding, you can put on something of your husband's to help mask the smell of your breastmilk (I used my husband's beloved fleece jackets).

As far as naps go, try looking at the Sleep Easy Solution - perhaps the timing is off a bit - that can make a difference. We had A LOT of trouble with naps, so I completely understand what you're going through - it drove me nuts! I think at that age he should be going down for his first nap like 2-2 1/2 hours after he wakes up. And then each subsequent nap (whether he's on 2 or 3) should be 2 1/2-3 hours after he wakes up from the first nap. The real key for us was giving my daughter a lovey - it worked like a charm! I was nervous b/c you're not supposed to put anything in their crib at that age but at least during the day I could watch her on the monitor (and it was real small anyway). I wish you the best of luck - I think the keys are timing and consistentcy. I hated being locked into set timing, but it seems like once you establish consistency, and they know what to expect, you can be a little flexible.

Hello D.: I thought I would give you another way to look at your delima. I am the mother of 5 ( & several foster children)and some like yours were tiny and really needed to eat every three hours day and night when they were only breastfeeding. You may just have that same situation.
My youngest grandchild at 4 months is just starting ceral, real potatoes and vegetables from the table. We are hopeful that this will help her to sleep longer hours.
I have read some of the " new baby book ideas" and have a real problem with the idea of not making eye contact with your child which is what many books say to do at night.I would rather rock and talk with my child than have it consider itself as unimportant or fearful of lack of parental careing. Sitting with your child at any point in the middle of the night can be a sweet experiance--- although very tireing. I wonder if you are shareing the night responsibility with your husband. Mine would always get up and change the diapers, tuck them back in, or bring them to me to nurse then put them either in bed with us or back into their beds. Even with our foster children because they were so insecure they were awake at strane hours of the night and just needed reassured someone was there. So please remember that the so called baby books are just advice and there may be may as many thoughts as there are books out there. Are you getting your rest when the baby sleeps during the day?? Have you tried a fan or music on in the room for white noise as they sleep? This has helped with all of our children and grandchildren. I know from having several grandchildren and both parents that work it is hard and very stressful as you have to think about going back to work. But please remember that your baby is only doing what babies do and that is fill their needs. So consider a test of solids at night time and see if it helps. rest when you can. Good Luck, Nana G

what time does he go down? Is he on solids yet? That helps...At around 6 months they go through a growth spurt so he may actually be hungry.

Good luck, my baby who is 8 months still gets up to eat and i've been told the cry it out works wonders...I just don't think i have the heart to do it!

D. ~ I think you should get the book Babywise, it is awesome for getting your baby on a good sleep schedule! It works wonders! Good Luck! ~ Janine

You got some great advice and the books are the best route but since I don't know the daily routine make sure you are taking him out in the day for a walk maybe to the park and then he can feed there etc. the air and sun and park play does wonders for them and makes them naturally tired. Do things outside that will tucker him out.

Hey, this is all too normal, yet un-enjoyable. My first question would be... are you co-sleeping? This often wakes children do to smelling milk and desiring of nurturing. If so, it may be time for his own bed. This is not cruel, it is just part of growing up. Learning to sleep independently is important for the family dynamic. I don't mean to say it's not hard, but, a happy well rested mommy makes for a patient and wise mommy. If you are not co-sleeping, have you tried not to nurse in the middle of the night? My first would wake every two hours and then we tried a modified baby whisperer technique that worked. We'd go in, pick him up, soothe, and put down while awake, then walk out. If he'd cry, we'd wait one minute, then 2, then 3, etc. until he was out. Anyway, I don't believe in letting anyone "cry it out" but this gave our kiddo an opportunity to try and learn that he was safe but was not going to fall asleep on mommy's boob.
I'm a mom to 3 very different kids that all learned how to sleep through at different rates and by different means. The key is consistancy and complete buy from your partner!
Good luck!

Hi D.,

I'm mom of 2 kids (9 y.o boy and 15 y.o girl now). But really remember same situation with my son at exact same age: wake up 2 times a night to feed and playing after 4a.m. feeding. The problem with mine was because I'm working mom,and someone else was taking care of him during the day (it was my mother-in-low ;-)) and she was happily telling me how long he was sleeping during the day !! I would say most of the time!!! As result, my son switched day with night completly even if it was dark at night. If it's the case, keep him awake during the day even he wants to go a sleep(of cause he would be fuzzy/tired at evening and crying) but after the while (1-2 weeks) he'll switch back to normal. Talk to your doctor.

Best of luck, O.