My 1 yr old DD has never been a good sleeper. We got a much needed break from middle of the night wakings from about 9-11 months where she was going to bed at 7pm and waking up at 7am straight through! We were so relieved that she was sleeping better and in turn so were we. At this stage she was even taking 2 naps a day. The first from 11-1 and the second from 4-6. All of a sudden this all stopped very abruptly. Overnight- she dropped her 2nd nap- flat out refuses to take it. Stands up in her crib and wails until we go in and get her. My pedia says dropping the 2nd nap is not that big a deal but the night time wakings is more of a concern. So here's our wind down routine. Dinner at 6pm, then bath at 6:30, bottle at 7pm and put down to bed- she usually falls asleep at this last bottle on my shoulder. I rock her until I know she is really out - then slowly put her in her crib to sleep for the night. She wakes up then around midnight (we are already asleep by now) hysterically crying. My DH and I take turns going in, we pick her up, rock her til she goes back to sleep. This takes between 30 mins and 1 hr each time. We go back to sleep. She wakes up again screaming 1 more time in the middle of the night usually around 4am. It starts all over. It has been 1 month of this now- we thought it would pass but it's the same every night.
Has anyone experienced something similiar around the 1 yr mark? I guess my parenting style is more like attachment parenting - we tried to have her sleep with us in our bed after she outgrew her co-sleeper but she wouldn't sleep like that, fidgets and thinks it's playtime so now she sleeps in her own room in a crib. I think I'd like to try a gentle approach to sleep training, my pedia agrees and says that the 1 yr mark is a good time for this as long as she doesn't have any other issues. Anyone try a gentle approach and had success? If so- what did you do? I know that you're not supposed to Pick up baby in any type of sleep training method even a gentle approach, but if we don't she is hysterical screaming standing up in her crib until we do! We are at a loss. My husband and I are so stressed out and fighting over what approach is best and just from sheer exhaustion too.
Thanks for listening and for your advice!
I would try co-sleeping again. If she fidgets, don't acknowledge it. If she talks to you, pretend to be asleep. Only time to interfere is if she is trying to get out of the bed. I still bed share with my 5 y/o - who's been asking to get her own bed now (yay!) and this was a stage we went thru and passed also. Children of such a young age shouldn't be expected to sleep and self sooth - adults can't even stay in bed asleep all night!
Hi J.,
So sorry to hear that you're going through this, it's really stressful. I should know, my son didn't sleep through the night until he was 1.5 years old (and he got his own room).
One thing stood out for me: you wait until your daughter is completely asleep before putting her in the crib. It's no wonder she panics when she wakes up in the middle of the night in a different place than where she fell asleep. It's a lot better to put her in her crib drowsy but still awake, and let her fall asleep by herself. She will fight it in the beginning (the hysterical crying), but it you stand firm for a couple of days, she'll get used to it and she'll be fine.
Also, putting her in bed still awake teaches her to soothe herself to sleep, rather than having someone else soothe her. We all wake up during the night, but get ourselves right back to sleep, and it's no different for the little ones. If she knows how to soothe herself back to sleep (and she learns it by doing it when falling asleep the first time), she will no longer wake you up at night.
Right now, she knows how to fall asleep only through being rocked by you, so when she wakes up in the middle of the night, she needs you or she can't get back to sleep.
I'm not going to lie to you, the first few days of the change will be tough, because all babies hate changes to their routines, especially ones that major, but if you stand firm she will soon learn how to fall asleep on her own, and soothe herself back to sleep when she wakes up in the middle of the night.
Good luck!
K.
I would stop rocking her to sleep. That's the biggest problem. She needs to learn how to self soothe, or you're going to be doing this forever.
She also doesn't need that bottle (she should be on a sippy) before bed.
You need to get her in the habit of soothing herself without you as a crutch.
Does she take a paci? I would give her that at bedtime (or whatever "lovie" she has, introduce one if she doesn't), and continue to use that whenever she wakes. Go in, lay her back down, give her her lovie, and leave. Repeat that until she gets the hang of it. After a few nights, she will.
DS would just "bink himself" when he woke up in the middle of the night. We also had a soother on his crib that he'd turn on and fall back asleep to. When we took away his paci (at 2), he still has a blankie that he soothes with.
You need to be "all business" in the middle of the night. Otherwise, she's going to continue yelling for you.
Okay, so here is the why, she just turned 1! So much is going on with her body (growth spurt) and in her mind (learning to walk, talk, etc.). Think about how hard it would be for you to sleep with all of that going on in your life? How would you want someone to help you sleep?
Did you know that you can side car your crib just like the co-sleeper? You basically take on side off of the crib and then use a bungy cord to securely attach the crib to your bed. Great instructions can be found here... http://www.freewebs.com/sidecarcrib/index.htm .
Sounds just like my first daughter. What is happening, IMHO, is that she can't go back to sleep without you rocking her. She doesn't know how. I believe you are going to have to start putting her down for bed by laying her in her crib and letting her learn how to fall asleep on her own. It's going to be hard for the first couple of days. Do the Ferber method. Go in there and reassure her, but don't pick her up. She'll eventually start going to sleep on her own. Then when she wakes up during the night she'll be able to self-sooth and put herself back to sleep. We had to do this with our daughter. It was hard at first but after about 3-4 days completely worth it. Good luck!
Here are a few sleeping suggestions that should help you get your LO into some better sleeping habits..hope it helps:
http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/sleep?utm_campaign=t...
Hi! My son's about the same age (a little older). I can only tell you what we ended up doing (and it worked-so far! lol). He has always gone to bed awake and happy, falling asleep easily. For a long time, though, he awoke at least once a night consistently.
Maybe 3 months ago he pushed himself to one nap most days (I helped push it to like 12 or 1 going down). I had been nursing him when he awoke at night, but one night I decided to try a change. I let him cry for a little while (like 15 min or so) then went in, held him, changed his diaper, held him, and put him back in the crib lovingly (maybe 15 minutes total for all of that). He cried for maybe another 15 min and fell asleep.
After about 4 nights, he was not interested in "just a diaper change" and cuddles, so he figured out how to soothe himself or whatever. Now every so often, I might go in just to pick him up tell him I love him, and put him back down-if he even needs me.
Good luck. It's a matter of the moons aligning, etc, lol. Try different things and it will work out.
With my daughter, now 3, she nursed to sleep from the get-go, but rarely awoke at night. It's a matter of finding the right mix.
ferber method....we used this when my daughter was 6-7 months old. you need to read the book to really understand his method...it's hard at first but it will benefit you, your husband and your daughter. good luck!
Updated
ferber method....we used this when my daughter was 6-7 months old. you need to read the book to really understand his method...it's hard at first but it will benefit you, your husband and your daughter. good luck!
Have you tried moving her O. nap to later in the day and make it as long as she wants?
I can't help but suspect she is overly tired (even though she has an early bedtime.
Maybe if her nap was after lunch (even if lunch has to be moved earlier if she's REALLY dragging by lunchtime) like say 12:30-3:30 or 4 she will sleep better at night?
Good luck!
