Hi everyone! My son has been waking up at 4 am or thereabouts and refusing to go back to sleep without help since he was 2 months old. Now he is 7 months old, and the only we he goes back to sleep after waking around 3 or usually 4 in the morning is if he is next to me in bed, but I'm worried about all the blankets and pillows and I would rather he sleep in his own crib. He goes to bed on his own well at 7:00, then wakes for a feeding around midnight and goes back to sleep on his own again. Unfortunately he won't go back to sleep at the second waking. Can I try the Ferber method if it starts that late? I tried it a couple of times but I wasn't very consistent about it and he really whined pretty much the whole time until 6 or 6:30 when I just let him get up. Any advice on this? I've tried feeding him at 4 and he's really not hungry, so I don't want to start 2 feedings again at 7 months of age. Thanks everyone!
NO don't Ferber. Even Ferber recanted in a New Yorker magazine article a few years back. . 7 months old is too young not to feed on demand. Or pick him up if he doesn't stop crying. He's a baby. Really, he is not "manipulating" he just need the simple love and comfort of his caretaker Just pick him up and love him. Then, when he is older, you can work a sleep schedule.
Just sayin......
Whatever you do, I agree with other posts, consistency is the only way it will work. We never let our daughter in our bed (I was terrified of rolling over on her or smothering her with our many feather comforters) but had her in a co-sleeper until six months. When we moved her out of our room and into her crib at that time, we sleep trained. First we eliminated the midnight feed and kept the 4 am feed. Then when we had checked with our pediatrician that she no longer needed to feed at that time, we cold turkey stopped it. It took three days. Thirty minutes of crying the first night, twelve the next night and five minutes the third. It's heartbreaking but ultimately, she was sleeping better and longer almost immediately. She is now almost two and sleeps very well at night. We were so concerned with keeping her nighttime sleeping as long as possible that we neglected naps so had to sleep train on that front later than I had hoped. Again, at 18 months, it only took three days to transition her from napping in the car to napping in her crib. Long and short of it, decide of a course of action, stick to it and see what happens. Every child is different, so no one else's approach may be perfect for you, but once you decide on a course of action and give it two or three days, you may be amazed at what can happen. Best of luck. Sleep for all of you is around the corner.
If my boys were fussy I always went in every 5 minutes to sooth. I would try to do so without food or even picking them up because it was important for them to understand that is was sleeping time, so I would lay them down and just sing or talk softly until they were calm, and than leave, if they fussed than I would wait another 5 minutes. Now, my boys were sleeping through the night by 2 months old so I never had to retrain them and this all came natural to them, with an older baby it will probably take a few nights for him to get it.
Gosh, if I were you, I'd try to push back his bedtime. You can do it in 15 minute increments to push it back to 8:00, then theoretically, he'd sleep until 5am, which is really wake up time for babies. It is worth a shot, and if it works, you can even go later!
Does he take a paci? I leave about 4 in the crib and my daughter finds one and goes back to sleep. But yes, you can do CIO for the 4 am waking...
Our pediatrician recommended that we cut nighttime feedings around 4 months, and to simply wait no less than 20 minutes after our son cried before we went to comfort him. In most cases, he'd put himself back to sleep.
Ferber worked for us for getting him to fall asleep & for dealing with middle of the night wakings, but we had to be consistent. I think it would be hard to start the Ferber method for the 4 am waking if you're still feeding at midnight. Check with your pediatrician to see if you can stop the midnight feeding & be consistent for all bedtime activity.
I hope this helps!
Yes, you can try the Ferber method. You have to be consistent though or it won't work. Be prepared for a few long nights (or long early mornings, in your case) but it will eventually work. I agree that feeding him is not a good idea since he's not hungry and already weaned to only one nighttime feeding.
Good luck! I hope it doesn't take too many days before he figures it out.
K.
http://oc.citymommy.com - where moms connect!
Using the crying-it out method (not going in like Ferber) my 1st daughter cried for 4 hours straight, 4 nights in a row and then slept through. I used the Ferber method with the 2nd, and it took about 2 weeks, is much less difficult on the parent, and works very well. I would follow the book to the T, do not change the method, and it works. YOU have to be consistent, since he has all night to try to get you to do what you want. I does not matter what time he wakes, you can use it. You could also try putting him in bed later to see if it shifts the wake-up time to something more suitable. Good luck.
