HELP!!! 5 Month Old Having Problems at Sitters

He's been at the sitter's for three months. Is this behavior just starting now? A five month old who is fussy, cries often and refuses food may very well be teething. I don't see what your sitter's pregnancy has to do with the situation. She wouldn't have the same "problem" with the other baby she watched, the problem isn't the sitter, the baby is cranky. I think it would be good if she took a little time each day to keep a log, when he cries, when he's cranky, for how long, when he eats and naps so maybe the two of you will see a pattern. But again, if this is relatively new and he was calm and happy before, I'd suspect teething.

If he's fussy he may be gasses up. You said you just started some foods. And now he's refusing to eat. Try gas drops. Sounds like it could be his little tummy. They worked wonders for both of my sons.

Good luck and God Bless!

I'm sorry but I have to laugh, your sitter is 6 months pregnant, has a 1 year old of her own, your 5 month old son, and you don't think she should be too overwhelmed, lol? At six months along I was starting my daily nap routine so i find this funny ; )

Seriously, though, it sounds to me as if your son is having separation anxiety. At 8 weeks the world was still relatively new to him, but now he's had time to see what it's all about. At his age they know who mom and dad are, they're familiar with their home surroundings and the sights and sounds, their sleeping area, what they like and how they like it, etc. Things are naturally changing in his life, he's now taking solids for one, but some little ones don't take so well to changes in their lives, he may be a tad too young to take solids yet. Maybe he would just prefer that he stay home with you and dad all the time, impractical, yes, but he doesn't know that. Also, it doesn't matter if the child she previously cared for had no problems, he was a different child than your son, you can't compare them or gauge your son by his behavior. And check his mouth, is it warm, his gums swollen and/or red? Sound like he could be teething as well, he's the right age.

He's also at the age where he needs to be on the floor and moving around more, it's a natural part of his development and if he doesn't get to do that during the day he may be missing it since he gets to do that with you. Is he in a pack n play where he can move about or confined in his carseat? And, how does your sitter's 1 year old interact with him? She may be jealous, and even bothering him, not necessarily on purpose, but maybe taking things away from him, fussing over him and trying to hug or kiss him, things he doesn't care for. My little guy is 2.5, but when he was smaller he would cry if someone fussed with him too much or took something away, now he just yells and tells me what happened so i know what's wrong ; )

Are you planning on leaving your son with this sitter after she has her baby? If not, I would find your new sitter now, maybe one with another child his age so he'll have a built-in playmate. Not because this sitter is a bad one, I don't believe from what you've stated that she is. It simply sounds like she's trying to keep you informed of how he's doing during the day, and you're getting frustrated because he's not acting like he does with you. But if you're going to move him it's better you do it now. If he's going to stay with her ask what she does when he cries or fusses, and gently make suggestions, telling her what you do with him at home to see if that helps.

His behavior actually sounds very normal for his age, as much as we want our children to be happy all the time the reality is that it doesn't always happen.

{{Hugs}}

I moved my 3 year old to a new daycare because he was not happy. it was the best thing I did. I don't know your kid, but I think I would try another sitter as my mom gutt is telling me something is wrong. I wish I had moved my son 4 months eariler than I did, but I kept saying to my self it will get better. Our situation was that his teacher left to have a baby, and then did not come back. and the kids went crazy after she left as the new teacher did not have the ability to keep the kids under control (as much as you can with 2 year olds).

Good luck

I had the same problem with my son. He started going to the sitter when he was 6 months old - he was happy and playful at home - fed normally. While at the sitters - he caught RSV and was sick on the 2nd week. Once he recovered, we took him back to the same sitter's house. She claimed for 3 weeks that all he did was cry, whine and refuse to eat. One day, he had a loose BM and she called me demanding that I pick him up becuase she couldn't listen to him whine all day. I picked him up and never took him back. We got a new sitter the next week, and she never had any problems. Your boy may just not "click" with the current sitter - or she doesn't have enough patience with him. I would look for a new sitter. We did and I have never looked back. Good luck to you.

This is the time that babies start their first round of separation anxiety. No matter how much we love them (as providers), they know who their mom and dad are. Some kids barely have a blip on the screen now and then have major separation anxiety in the future before 2. Some never have it. But most have it from time to time.

I don't think it helps that she's 6 months pregnant. She's tired and I'm sure he feels the added pressure, even if she's not willing to admit she's tired and strained. BUT, I gave birth 3 times in my 25 years of daycare and had several more children than what she has. We all managed.

Part of me wants to say that you should go ahead and find someone else so that you don't have to find someone in 3 months when she gives birth and if he's feeling poorly over there, maybe a new place would work out better. BUT... it's possible it's truly just him missing you and he'll be this way at a new place even more because he won't know them. It's a tough time to switch. But if you know you will need to be with someone for a few weeks or a month or so later, just do it now. It'll hasten his having to get to know someone, but he'll get through it and life can move on again :)

she needs to "love" on him & reconnect....

or maybe it's stranger anxiety kicking in early.....usually it happens around 9 months.

How do you feel about this?

If you are seeking suggestions for the babysitter, I'd suggest that she never force or "encourage" him to eat. She should keep meals pleasant, offer him food and chat or sing to him, and let him decide whether he wants to eat or not. As for him crying, that may take care of itself.

But.... if you have a nagging internal voice telling you something is really not working, please consider finding a new sitter. I speak from experience. Never ignore your intuition. Find a new sitter, offer this one fair compensation for at least two weeks, thank her for all she has done, and never doubt yourself.