Hi everyone, I know that it is soon the end of the year for school. My son has had a hard time getting organized, listening, classwork is sometimes hard to concentrate, Homework, well he brings home what is scheduled most of the time. He has trouble with the other kids at school, he lost his desire to go to school, and last night he told me as he was in tears that he is scared of failing this year. We have been to many conferences and actually we are in an intervention, and I thought that this would be helpful, but to tell you the truth, I see nothing happening and it has gotten worse. I guess I just need to vent here, and I wanted to know if anyone has or is going through the same thing. Thanks for listening. M. B.
Thank you everyone very much for your care on my situation. Although, this is such a struggle, you all have eased my mind. My son was tested many times for ADD, and although the teachers felt he was, the doctors thought otherwise. I was told that I could try giving him omega 3, magnesium, and the B vitamins, thery are good for you and help in the process. He takes a multivitamin 3x a day, I may give it a try. I also thought about homeschooling, but as I think about it every day, it makes me feel insecure, my Husband its in the Navy, and we won't see him for a while, so to make this step is unsure. I thought about a virtual school from my state. It is still public school but it is done at home and the state provides all the supplies needed, plus a free lender of a computer.(which I don't believe I will need). Thank you all again for your replies and care. M. B.
M. 1st have you considered homeschooling?
2nd have you thought about ELP or ILAP?
i have younger children but i am a homeschooler and i think that children do so much better and being that you other children are older this is probably the best thing for him and you to help him and to see him do well in all his studies!
if you need help i am here and can talk.
~M.
After begging and pleading with the school system, they finally tested my son in his 4th year of school...which meant that remedial efforts couldn't be started until his 5th year. He was then diagnosed with learning disabilities and with ADD (attention deficit WITHOUT hyperactivity.) This easily escapes detection in the classroom because without the hyperactivity, the child does not call attention to himself by acting up in class. So it is assumed that the kid is unmotivated and is willfully unresponsive (daydreaming?). My poor kid had such a low opinion of himself by the time he got out of grade school, thanks to some supposedly well-trained teachers who ridiculed and humilated him in front of class for not following directions and for failing to complete class assignments. If your school's administrative staff offer no support, call your county's school administration offices to see what resources are available and keep up your efforts, because, unfortunately, it is still the squeaky wheel that gets fixed! I'll be glad to talk to you if you need more info; let me know what happens..good luck!
Have you looked into ADD? I know it seems to be the thing that all doctors are looking at now. But both of my daughters were diaganosed in elementary school. My older daughter has it the worst. She started showing symptoms in 2nd grade. All of the things you described are symptoms of ADD. Just so you know not all ADD is hyperactive. There are different variations (types) of ADD. After my girls were diagnosed and put on the correct medications, their focus improved as well as their other symptoms. Their grades also improved. As for school there are some concessions that can be made if your son is diagnosed with ADD. I know a good neurologist that works with ADD children as well as a therapist. Medicines don't work alone. ADD children and adults create coping skills that may need to be adjusted as well as helping the child understand that ADD is not a fault. It is a neurological malfunction. Knowing that helps with self respect. If you are interested in this avenue the Neurologist is West Coast Child Neurology ###-###-####. He is in Tampa but the trip to see him is worth it.
Hope this helps.
K.
I am the mom to a 7th and an 8th grader and I feel your pain. I teach elemntary school and my kids had no problem there. When they got to middle school they both went bonkers!! The oldest has found some organization and things are getting better, but the younger is in the same boat as your son. I found a school in our area that is a charter school and focuses on academic concerns it is very structured and I hope it will help my daughter next year to get back on track. Maybe you can find something similar in your area. Also, there are often many tutorial summer programs that are intensive, both fun. Maybe your son could benefit from a little extra help that might boast his confidence for next year. Please feel free to contact me and vent anytime. Trust me, I feel your pain.
M., I would like to suggest you look at your son's diet. I am a certified home economist and have been an educator for 35 years. I've learned firsthand how improving the nutritional quality of a young person's diet can have a great effect on their ability to concentrate and focus. Personally, I know young people who have greatly improved their ability to succeed in their studies, when the proper nutrition was consumed. I've seen their attitude, focus, and interest in school improve when their eating habits changed. I am familiar with a company that has protein shake mixes that a child can use as the base for smoothies. They also have a wonderful fruit and a "greens" product that can be added to the chocolate or vanilla shakes, and provide all the vitamins and phytonutrients needed. Children love making their own smoothies and one of these shakes provides more nutrition in one serving than most children get in a day. To learn about them, you may to to www.weighless2day.isagenix.com.
my 7th grader is my oldest of 4, so we weren't sure if it was the age or the kid. my only daughter is in 5th grade and has always done really good in school. but my son............he would rather think about video games and website designs. i talk to the doctor all the time, because my mom has said that maybe he has a.d.d.. but she tells me that i should take the video games away, like i haven't tried that. the doctor has given me the worksheets for the teacher and me and my husband to fill out to check if he is a.d.d., but parently he doesn't meet it. he still doesn't do his work. everyday i ask him if he has homework and everyday he tells me 'no' or 'i did it in school'. then when i look at his grades online- 2 f's, a d, some b's.......just not good. but also next to most of the assignments it says that the grades haven't been posted yet. so my son lets me believe that he truly did turn it in. most of the time the teacher puts the assignment grades online when it is too late for my son to turn it in (that is when i know that he truly has not turned it in). when i email the teachers about the assignments- they don't return my emails. when i have conferences with the teachers, they say that my son should be doing his work- not having his mom check up on him.- my sons mind is just not at school. i told him that he could build a website when his grade come up...........so instead of bringing up his grades, he's 'designing' his website in his head. i just don't know what to do either. i have thought about tutors, but when we ask my son if he isn't understanding the work, or if its just that he isn't doing the work. he won't answer. all of his teachers believe that he knows how to do the assignments, but he chooses not to do them.
Hi,I am a working mother of 3 (13 yr old girl and 3 yr old twin boys).My daughter went through a very similar situation and we ended up putting her on an adhd medication for concentration. I know, no one wants to put their kid on a med. but she tells me it helps a lot. You might want to consider a visit to the doctor an option, esp. if your son is really trying to improve. Good luck!
Take a step back from the stresses of homework and find out things that your son enjoys in school. Science? Math? Engligh?A sport? Art? I think he just needs to find confidence in something he enjoys and then everything else will follow. Maybe a mentor/ tutor would be good for him. I can't imagine being in school now, especially with the FCAT. They are taking the fun out of learning and I'm sure that has alot to do with your sons fear of failing.
I'm so sorry to hear about your problems. If I were in your shoes I might consider pulling him from school and homeschooling for a while. I know some posts have said to look into medicating for ADD or ADHD, but I truly think some kids just need a different kind of attention to thrive and your son may be one of these. Best of Luck to you!
Jen
As a mother of 4 and a former teacher, I am overwhelmed by the amount of homework that my children are burdened with on a daily basis. My children have been in tears because they were exhausted by the boring weekly assignments.
My oldest son, who is now in 7th grade, has had his first year where we were not struggling to pass to the next grade. The difference was that the teachers allow time in class for work to be completed. This means that homework is rare, and met with more excitement. Because he is not overwhelmed and has time to rest, he is able to focus on his schoolwork and really learn.
My other children are still struggling with the overwhelming amount of daily homework, so I set limits on how much I will allow them to do each day and try to make it as much fun as I can.
