Going Back to School?

Going back to school would be the best for you and your kids. If your boyfriend is not going to support you in this do you have family that can help you out? I would suggest sitting down with him and asking why he doesn't want you to better your situation. If he is off of work and you are able to better the whole family by going back to school why won't he support you. I know it is a lot of work working and going to school. I am finishing my bachelors at Baker with two young ones. Good luck! I would be happy to talk if you need it.

R.,

Schools have daycare. If he's not supportive of you, then YOU have to be supportive of you. School is such a wonderful gift to yourself and to your children. Please dont let someone so selfish influence your decision or your future. There are ways. Go to the school you're thinking of attending and talk to a counselor there. That's what they are there for and you are not the only one to face this issue. They're there to help. You can do it :o). You should be proud of youself for wanting to go and for making a difference in your life and for asking all of us for advice. They're all difficult things. I'm proud of you and I know that if you really want it, you'll find the way.

L.

Hi R.,

It sounds like you're in a tough spot financially right now. I think that if you're willing to make the sacrifices to work and go to school you should. I'm sorry to hear that your BF is not supporting you. If he can't(or won't) work right now, then I don't understand why he objects to you trying to make a career for yourself. Is he afraid that if you better yourself that you won't have time left for him, or that you'll find someone better, or is he just being lazy? Maybe you should talk to him and try to get to the heart of the matter. If, in the end, your BF won't help you, maybe you can turn to family and close friends for help. If, like my husband & I, you don't live near your family, maybe the school you want to attend has a daycare program. Students can usually get discounted rates, and you may qualify for state assistance. A good counselor at the college you're considering should be able to at least point you in the right direction. I hope I've helped a little. Good luck!!
S.

Financial aid is huge for parents, especially single parents! My husband just graduated from GRCC and his Pell grant paid for absolutely everything, including books! I am at Western right now ( I commute to Kzoo every day) and they have a decent aid package, though I have had to take out loans because I can't work. WMU also has a daycare/preschool program that gives Pell Grant receiving students a 50% discount. It is hard, but I've found that I can get most of my homework done after 8pm when my son goes to bed and he also knows that we have "quiet time" when he will sit next to me and read or draw while I do work during the day. Sometimes house work is lacking, but that's okay!!! Good luck!

I agree with the other statements about college. It is a wonderful thing you can do for yourself. I also agree that with the job market out there that the health care field is a wonderful choice. I myself am a LPN and will be an RN shortly. You don't have to take classes fulltime. I earned my degree by working and doing classes partime. Yes you can get financial aid assuming that you are low income. Grants from the state are great. The best part is that they are totally free. You might have to take out some student loans to help you along the way. If you get rid of the boyfriend that doesn't want to help you, the state will also pay for your day care while you are attending school. I had to take out some student loans while going to school just to help with some bills. But just think when you are done with school and making good money you can take time to pay them back. The government gives you 30 years to pay the loans back, trust me I know. Just some points to consider and I wish you luck on this tough decision you have to make.

If this guy won't support you going back to school, he will not be supportive of other decisions you make in the future. Period.

There is a HUGE amount of financial aid available for single parents. And I'm not talking only about loans. Grants are completely free of obligation. I used them for my entire undergraduate career. If you need to take out loans, don't hesitate. The interest rates are super low, and you don't have to pay them back until you graduate and are making money.

I do, however, question the decision to major in childhood development. I know that this makes it easier to run a home daycare, but, take it from me, your kids won't be young forever; and when they are all in school, do you really want to be caring for other people's kids? Also, this field is known for miserably low incomes.

I would meet with a career counselor at your school and ask what careers are available for you. The only field that is experiencing growth right now is health care; have you considered careers in that area?

Think of your future in the long term. I have been in school since my son was born (he's six now) but I know that when I graduate from pharmacy school I will be able to give him whatever he wants, with or without a man (for the record I AM married). Go for the most success you can possibly achieve. I venture to guess you will impress yourself, and probably your boyfriend as well.

As a student and mother who is FINALLY getting her bachelor's degree in December ;), I can tell you that it really makes things easier to have emotional support. My husband has been extremely supportive, from doing things like taking the kids out of the house when I need to study and coming home from work early if they are sick so that I don't have to miss class. So,I don't think that it is asking too much for him to be helpful.

Could this be an insecurity issue? Do you think that he won't be supportive because he is afraid that you will be smarter than him or meet someone new? There is a trend that a lot of women end up leaving unsupportive men after they have finished their education...

I went to school for Early Child Development while running a licensed group daycare in my home. There are a lot of grants out there for daycare providers. If you work it right you can do your tech hours working for yourself while getting paid pretty well for it:) Sometimes it takes longer to get an education with kids at home, but it's worlth it in the end. Good Luck!

You are NOT wrong. After 5 kids, I finally went back to school last fall. I work full time AND go to school full time. I take my classes online so I am home with my kids. Your bf is obviously not going to help out, so go and do it yourself. I'm separated from my husband and I barely get any help from him. You will also be setting a great example for your children. They will see how strong and determined their mother is and they will be so proud of you!! Go back to school!!! You will not regret it.

i don't mean to be rude. but i don't think he loves you if he can not support your decision to go back to school. you can work and go to school. i do both snd i tell you if my finance was not supportive of my decision to do both i would have left him. because these jobs out here or not worth the work we put into it. having a career makes life seem alot better even if it is stressful because it is something you chose to do and not what you have to do. and you should be able to take one or two if you want to. and plus how can he tell you not to go to school when he is not working. both of you should go to school it can help you both. sorry for me being mean but i hate to hear someone not supporting someones decision to better themselves. hope everything works out and god bless you.