Getting My Toddler to Sleep

I couldn't help but notice that you kept saying we. Would it be possible to have your partner take over? My 19 month old never slept in his crib, nor did his older sister. But at around 18 months we wanted them out of our bed. With the first child it was because I was 5 months pregnant. Logistically, I don't think we all would have fit in our bed. Anyhow, now with number two we wanted him to sleep in his own bed. It's a toddler bed so he can get in and out of it.

My husband took over the bedtime routine. Everytime he got out of bed, my husband would remind him to go sleep in his own bed. I was totally out of the picture. I would stay down stairs until he was asleep, and I would stay in bed and let my husband handle him when he got up looking for me. It only took a weekend to get him used to it, now he stays in bed until almost 6:00 am. Anyhow, it was much easier to get him used to sleeping on his own, without the distraction of mommy. We are also working on weaning, so there is also that distraction.

I suppose what I'm suggesting is to try to let someone else get him used to sleeping on his own. It doesn't take long (sadly) for them to get used to a new routine without us.

Good luck,
T.

i almost could have written that post (with the exception of cry it out - i'm so not good with that!)... my almost 3 year old's lovey was my hair (well, and still is to a great extent). :) i gradually weaned him off the hair by finding him a bedtime friend that he liked. it ended up being a bunny that reminded him of the bunny in the book "the runaway bunny".

anyway - we have the same routine at naps and bedtime. that seemed to work really well. as a special treat i sometimes lay down to nap with him, but he's usually in his bed drifting off for nap just like when he goes to bed. our routine at nap is shorter (usually no stories), but i sing him a few songs, turn on sleepy music, give him a hug and a kiss, put him in bed awake and promise to check on him in 10 minutes (for awhile we checked every 2 minutes, then went to 5, now 10 and he's usually asleep).

it seems like he has a really healthy attitude about sleep, he just needs some help with naptime dependence. if you have a well-established bedtime routine, it might work to just institute that at bedtime too.

the no-cry sleep solution is a great book too...

good luck! it takes some patience, but eventually you'll get there!

Try the book "Good night Sleep Tight" by Kim West. It is fantastic - no crying it out and works within a couple of weeks. It saved me!

Something that might help, along with a consistent bedtime routine is to talk to your son and tell him that he needs to sleep on his ownnow that he is a big boy but you will help him get used to it by staying with him for 5 min, then 3, then one. The trick is, you really have to leave when you say you will, and this might not work if he just gets worked up over finding ways to make you stay, but you said you were looking for something gradual. Also, let him pick out a toy that has the same soft feel as your hair. Transitional objects can really help.