I have recently tried to transition my 13 month son to sleep in his crib. I started with his naps first. He has been sleeping with me and my husband since he was around 5 months. A little background on him is he is breastfed and needs mom's hair to play with to stay asleep. I no longer nurse him at night but still am holding him when he wakes to put him back to sleep. Well this week I have started to let him try taking his naps by himself (I usually hold him or lay down with him). He has refused to lay down to take a nap. He stands and puts his head down on his arm and sleeps like that, till his legs start to give out then he wakes and cries for a few minutes. I have tried to put him to sleep then lay him down but he just wakes up as soon as his head hits the pillow. Has this ever happened to anyone else. I feel so bad for him, but am not sure what to do to help him.
Thanks
L.
L.,
I would suggest reading the book "Sleeping Through the Night" by Jodi Mindell. I found it to be very helpful and realistic.
Good luck,
L. M
I used the lay him down and rub his back until he was pretty much asleep then leave "method." If he woke back up and got up, I would go back and do it over and over again until he got the message that it was time to go to sleep. I think I did this for a night or two. Then it was easy sailing. After a couple of nights, I would just ignore it and sooner or later he figured that all he could do was just lay down and fall asleep. I did this around 11 months of age and he has been a great sleeper ever since. My son is now almost two and sleeps great. I hope I didn't jinx myself.
i put a playpen in my room and it has been working out great!
I have a 12 month old who I keep in a sling for naps. She sleeps great, I get things done, and she never cries! She often nurses through her naps. If you are feeling bad about something trust your instincts. It is probably not the best thing to do. try reading dr sears!!!
You sound like a wonderful, attached mama! And you painted a very pathetic picture...poor little man :-(
Hmmmm...he's young, but what about a toddler bed or just a mattress on the floor of his room? Nothing to lean on that way ;-)
Also, maybe a doll-baby with hair he can stroke, or something of yours that he connects with you as a substitute (well-worn t-shirt, neck scarf, etc)
If all that's no go, I'd try wearing him for naps like was previously suggested and just try again in a month or two.
Your baby sounds like my daughter. First know that this is completely normal behavior for your son. There is a certain amount of transition time with a baby that is so used to having mom there. He will not automatically fall asleep on his own if he is used to having you with him. I'm sure you will get many responses about how your baby is "too attached to you", and you need to let him learn to "self soothe" personally I think that's all a bunch of bull. You are a great attachment mother, and your baby is just doing what he should naturally do. Give it time and be gentle with him. My daughter also needs me to go to sleep, and that's okay! As they get older they will learn (and you will learn) new techniques to go to sleep. Make sure he is FULLY asleep before you put him down. Have you read the Baby Book By Dr. Sears? He covers all these issues and has specific remedies for getting baby to sleep. Also check out there website http://askdrsears.com for some really helpful advice. You are not alone, this time will pass!
I took care of a little girl who would only go to sleep playing with somebody's hair so I bought her a doll with real feeling hair and started off laying with her but having her play with the doll's hair instead of mine and then slowly I took myself out of the picture and she was soothed by the doll's hair. I usually find gradual approaches work well! Good luck!!
Dear L.,
I too have been trying to nail down the right sleep routine for my son. He is 10 months old and since 6 months usually he has been falling asleep on me and then I put him to bed. At a recent visit to the doctor, he told me that I should be letting him cry it out and that in the long run it was best for him. Well, let me tell you it that this was a nightmare. We tried this for 3 days and it was awful. My son was so exhausted and would cry for 2 hours and not go to sleep. He would sit up and refuse to lay down. I was hesitant about this method before and now I am totally against it. For bedtime now I lay him down when I can see him getting tired and pull my rocking chair bedside his crib and pat his back until he's asleep. I also sing him lullabies for a short time. Naps we are still working on but at least it's not days of crying and no sleep. You are not alone with your sleeping troubles. I hope that you find something that works for you.
My son is 15 months old and he too has a hard time falling asleep in his bed alone. I think its a very frightening situation for a small child, to be left alone in this little enclosure. So what I do for night-time sleep (we still nap together in my bed), we have our routine of reading books and snuggling, then I put him in his crib while I sit right next to him in the rocking chair reading my own book. He usually falls asleep very happily in about 10 minutes.
I agree with the last mum who posted, you are doing a great job being an attached mama, please don't resort to cry-it-out methods. There are other ways which take everyone feelings into account.
