For Christian Moms.....Where Do You Do This????

I don't find the idea of being alone impossible but I didn't sign up for a career for 24/7 daycare either. Good luck to you in finding some quiet time you deserve! The other ladies have some great suggestions.

I remember from a very young age that if I walked into the bedroom and my grandmother or my mom where kneeling by the bed praying that I was to be quiet because they were talking to God. My mom taught me to kneel and say my prayers at bedtime. That has just always worked in my family. I would catch Grandma and my Granny at the bedside sometimes during the middle of the day, I could be walking in yacking but the minute I saw them in prayer I knew to be quiet and wait. Teach your children that talking to God is very, very important and they will respect it.

Matthew 6:6
But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.

I make a point of setting my alarm clock earlier than my husbands. I wash my face, get some juice, take a walk around the block with the intention of "listening". I make everyone's breakfast while husband showers, then go take a shower with the door locked while they're eating. That's my special "prayer closet" and I close the door with purpose, to pray and listen. That's my time. When going about the day with just myself and my toddler (oldest in preschool and husband at work), I put on praise and worship or a teaching CD, something.....you can be feeding yourself spiritually while cooking and cleaning that way.

Hi SLM, I'll bet you communicate with God all day EVERY day. That 'quiet time' thing doesn't need to be taken literally I don't think. You praise Him everytime you look lovingly upon your children, everytime you're patient with you husband when you'd really like to strangle him, everytime you put off buying yourself new jeans because this one needs new sneaks, or that one broke his glasses.

In God's eye, Mothers are the CareTakers Of The World, you hold a special place with Him, He sees your grace and understands your frustrations every single day.

(And btw, I LOVE your profile pix, you look just like EveryOne's Mom, should be next to 'Mother' in Websters!)

Don't fret, you are with God every minute, you don't need to be 'alone' with Him! Least that's the way I like to think!

:)

you know, I tell my family that I NEED a moment...there are times when I am alone in the kitchen fixing dinner or some other meal and I talk to God...I cut my veggies and thank God for the food I'm preparing for my family and that I have a family to prepare it for....I also turn over my burdens to Him....

Take a deep breath. Let it out slowly...God knows you need Him...He's there...so when you are cleaning up the kitchen after a meal - talk to Him!!!

I don't think you have to be alone to hear God at all. He is with you all the time. I say a lot of prayers in my head as I'm doing laundry, vaccuuming, etc. Anytime is a good time to talk to and listen to God.

Don't be resentful. God made both you AND your work.

But I understand completely what you're saying!

Getting alone sometimes has to be more of a state of mind! And that doesn't just apply to young mamas. Anyone's time quickly gets filled to the brim with things and people and urgent needs.

Some folks actually have the opportunity to sit down, study, and pray for a certain amount of time every day, and that's great; what THEY need is the discipline to do it. Other people have that time only in minutes (or seconds?). Right now you're in the minutes-flying-by delegation.

For now, think about focus rather than geography. You don't have the opportunity to locate yourself in one place, sit down, and concentrate for a long time.

There's something I do in this regard. I've done it off and on for years, and I'm back to it at the moment. I must add that there may be many better ways than this.

Instead of lamenting not having a chunk of time to read and pray, I have my Bible open on my bed - once I've made the bed - at the right place. Whenever I go in the bedroom for something, I read a small section. Don't go by verses; they're handy for reference but not for meaning. Just take a small section to read. Make it deliberately small. Then, as you do certain parts of your work, think about what you've read, hold it in the back of your mind, and talk to God silently about it as you do the other things you need to do. When something comes to my mind about what I've read, I take a second to jot it down (I try to keep sticky notes handy all over the house) so I won't forget it.

It may seem unorthodox, I know, but I have always found it helpful at the times when "alone" is just a Greta Garbo word in a vintage movie.

Don't worry about God's getting through to you. Yes, He often speaks in a still, small voice rather than with something huge and impressive. That was something Elijah had to learn! However, homemaking/family jobs do not impede God in the least. As long as we really want to listen, we'll find He has no problem communicating with us.

When I want to study God's word and really concentrate (or even pray and really concentrate), I use a journal. I write about what I am reading in the Bible, and I write my prayers, also. That way, when I inevitably get interupted, I can return to what I was writing and refocus quickly by re-reading what I just wrote.

Even for people who do have time alone, quiet meditation doesn't always work. When I was in college, I went into a meditation chapel to try it out. I didn't get it. It felt too forced. Like most of the other responders, I talk to God throughout the day, not at a specific quiet time. Quiet meditation might really work for other people, but I, too, don't like it when others make me feel as though my prayer isn't as good as theirs if I don't do it their way.

If you really want to do it that way, though, I think the idea about kneeling (or some other signal to your kids) would work well.

I take time to read my Bible before bed every night and I can spend time praying while I shower. I know it is not much but I do what I can when and where I can. God will speak if we are listening and no it doesn't always have to be super quiet for him to do so. I have had him speak to me while my kids are running around the yard and I have taken a few minutes to pray while watching them. I think it is important to keep the prayer conversation going throughout the day too.

God knows our heart at all times. He knows our situation and he knows the lengths we have to go to just to get things done on a daily basis. I believe there is no wrong time to talk to God. I do it all day long. And I know in my heart when Im being led in a certain direction. I have a problem with people putting parameters on MY relationship with God. If you need quiet alone time to communicate with Him, fine, but I don't.

Great question! Are you an early riser or a night owl? I am usually a night owl so I find my best time to be when everyone has gone to bed for the night. For you it might be easier to get up earlier as others have posted. I do best when I have a structured Bible study with questions to answer. I like having great questions to ponder instead of aimlessly trying to quiet my mind. Do you have a hard time turning off the brain as I do? There are some great Bible studies out there. One that you might like is, "The Frazzled Female" by Cindi Wood. It is designed for, you guessed it, the frazzled female!

As your kids get older, you can teach them also that if you are on a certain spot (the corner of your bed, on the sofa with your Bible open, etc.) that they are not allowed to bother you. But tell them they can bring their Bible in and join you in silent reading. It took a little while, but my kids learned and I love that it was teaching them that it is important to take time for God.

Just remember that Satan wants you to believe it is impossible to be a godly mom.

You can pray without it being "planned" or set aside. God knows your situation and I think that he is pleased at the fact that you even pray. As someone else said. I will pray as I am doing something else. It might not be an "ideal" situation but its all I honestly have time for. I try my best to pray each night before bed but half the time I am so exhausted I think I fall asleep in the middle of it. Just thank him throughout your day out loud or not and pray to him outloud in front of your children-they will look at you funny but in the end you are teaching them many things by doing so. God understands your situation and if you really feel like you "need" this time then pray about it that God will change something in your situation to create that time for you. My kids are 8 so they are al ot older but I remember when they were younger and oh ay ay ay!!! I pray ALOT in the car on my way to work and back. Turn off the radio and I just pray. If the kids are with me-it's much more difficult so I do it in between other things even with them screaming in the background-lol! It's crazy because if I start to pray they start up and I will start to pray for God to intervene and they usually end up working things out so that I can finish up my prayers.

My alone time is not for prayer, but rather my own sanity. Like Angela, I get up much earlier than everyone else in my house specifically so that I can have an hour of quiet time. I like to read a book, drink some coffee, get showered, dressed & hair/make-up done before everyone else is up & the house becomes a zoo. It helps keep me centered for the day to come.

If you are being a caregiver for an ailing mother that is not going to get better then you need to contact some home health agencies and try to find out if she can qualify so you can have some respite care. I worked in home health for a year, it was the WORST job of my life and I hated every day. But, I admire those who are suited to the work and love doing it. They have special hearts. I worked in the homes of several women and they would leave as soon as I arrived or go to their room to nap, or maybe go do laundry or start a craft project. The point is that they could count on an aid to come at the appointed time, they could do things they wanted to do and know that a trained professional would care for their older loved ones. I would sit and visit, watch TV, help bathe, get them up into their wheel chairs, feed lunch, change diapers (adults, not the kids) and even set up their meds for the next week. I would also do the light housekeeping things that we contracted to do for the family. Run the sweeper, cook light meals, dust, mop, clean the bathroom, etc....

Find a respite care giver, take the kids to Mothers-Day-Out for a few hours a week, take some well deserved time for yourself. If you don't take care of yourself then when you collapse who will take care of your family then, plus take care of you?

You have to do what actually helps you (and what's realistic). If your husband and your mom are able to find that quiet alone time and it's helpful to them that's great. But you have to do what works for you. For me, it's those few minutes each night when I'm lying in bed. Sometimes I read, sometimes I just lie there quietly and think about whatever is on my mind. This is my time with God. It might not be terribly formal, and I don't always have scripture in front of me, but it's my time with God.

Try not to worry about what your husband and your mom say. Your relationship with God is about you and God, and you need to do what works, not what someone else says you're "supposed" to do.

In our house we do lots of praise and worship 24/7 with lots of involvement on the kids part. I have never heard a verse citing that you need to be alone and only alone to talk to the Lord (though if you have one I am open). Even Daniel didn't pray alone! He went to a balcony and praised the Lord out loud, so loud in fact his enemies KNEW and got him thrown in a lions den...
http://bible.cc/daniel/6-10.htm

Yes, it is a still small voice, but the closer you get to him the louder he gets, or maybe we listen better?

It is really tough - expecially when the kids are young. I always worked and while I listened to Christian radio in the car it's not the same as really getting into the word and having a rich prayer life. I think God recongnizes the didfferent seasons we're in and He feeds us however we can be fed. One of the older women in my church suggests that you take a half hour and park the kids in front of a video/CD so you can get alone.

My kids are almost 12 and almost 15 and I still have a tough time getting away to hear His still small voice. I try to get up a half hour earler than I otherwise need to - I throw a load of laundry in the washer and sit in th equiet LR and see waht God has to say to me. I know someone here posted that she does better with a formal study - but my personality is the type that says "I don't have the 30 mintues it takes to properly answer these questions so I'll do it another time" - and then it never gets done.

I also have an elderly mother that I care for and yes - it really complicates things to be a part of the sandwich generation. But God cares about the details of your life - so ask that He would help you find the time. There was a time in my life when my kids went to bed early that I'd get all cozy in my bed and do my quiet time there - I was able to keep a nice prayer journal and everything. What a rich time!

Persistence is the key - jsut keep trying - whatever you can. A man from our church told us moms one day that he recalls his mom reading her Bible in the kitchen while dinner was cooking on the stove, while she waited for baseball practice to end, on the line at the grocery store. To that end I have a car Bible, a bedroom and a LR Bible - so there's one at my finger-tips when I need it. So if I'm waiting in the school parking lot, at little league practice, etc I can fill my time with God's word.

You'll figure it out - and it will change as you go through different seasons of your life. Cut yourself some slack and realize that God knows how hectic your life is.

I totally understand...my "favorite" answer was to get up an hour before the kids to have your "alone" time.

I just sighed wondering if that meant really like 5am...because there are few people I know especially mom's who find getting up for the day at 5am feasible when the last feeding and or tucking someone back in bed just happened at 3:30 to 4am. And 6am is the time you have to be up by to get the older kids off to school on time.

Seasons come and go...some days I find time between bus pick up and little one waking up...some days before bed...and some days praying on the run or while you make the one millionth pancake or fill the one billionth sippy cup or make the trillionth pb&j.

I do find that if I am enrolled in a Bible study at church that meets once a week I am better at finding that time because you have to have completed your lesson. But some weeks I do arrive at class with nothing but blanks in my book.

HUGS!!

I find that when I do have "alone" time I just want to veg out!! I personally look at intimacy with God a lot like my relationship with my honey. We talk everyday, see each other, joke around, all that daily. But we do not have special "alone" ;) time everyday, life is just to tiring for all that!! I approach God in much the same way. I talk to him daily as I live life, making breakfast, while my kiddos are listening to something in the car, making dinner etc. I pray for people all the time just in the course of my day. I make time to really read the word and have more intimate time a few times a week, at least I try!! At least once ;) I live my life with God, he is not sequestered to 10 minutes in the morning. I have had times that were much less hectic and I did really set aside that time and it was so wonderful. Life has it's seasons, He gets that I believe. :D

I get up early, when everyone is still asleep.

Devotionals are just as good as hardcore bible studies. You still get fed, but in less time.

Try doing a verse a day. Its better to be able to focus on even 1 verse in God's word that day, then none at all.

Ask God to provide you with more alone time! No, it isn't impossible. Just teach your kids to give you that time. We teach our kids how important it is to be respectful and not interupt when we are talking to other grown ups or when we are on the phone or on the computer or doing work and everything else. You can do the same when we are reading our Bible or in prayer. My son knows when my head is bent over the pages of my Bible, he needs to find something else to do.

Preaching to the choir. That is all. :-)

The ONLY way I seem to get it done is to get up very early in the morning . . . and my kids are 17 & 14. It's even harder with little kids.

When I do manage to do it my days go much better.

Good luck and God bless you.

God is in the details.
There are God sightings everywhere...
I find time to give thanks all during my day. I certainly don't need to be quiet and meditate to be close to God.
LBC

It's hard. I work full-time and I have an hour commute to and from work. That commute is usually the quietest time of my day and when I usually get to thinking about God, life, etc. It sounds like you're a SAHM so I really don't know when you would have time b/c I can't do anything when I'm at home. The only thing I can think of is after the little ones are sleeping. Maybe take a few moments to not do chores but just sit in your room for a little bit and have some QT. Good luck,

For me, I don't have to be alone to pray or meditate. I talk with God in my head, ask him to show me signs, guidance, etc. I have an ipod, so if I need to tune out for awhile, that helps.

learn to lock the bathroom door. you deserve that much privacy in life!

I used to jog and that was also my prayer and meditation time.
Although my sons are older and I can have quiet time now, I find it hard to do. I think we are all different in how we relate to God. Two of the times that I felt for sure I heard God speaking to me I was surrounded by other people.

Go to a quick lunch on your own to a drive through fast food place, then eat your lunch alone at the far end of the parking lot.
Seems to me you are stressed enough right now where it would be ok for your Mom to share the stress by watching the kids for an hour or hire a sitter.

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