Feeling Frustrated and Isolated...

Here are groups where I found some of the greatest friends that I have:

http://www.kecpta.com/ I actually belong to the one in Mansfield.

http://www.momsclub.org/links.html

Hope this helps.

Try MOPS.org (mothers of preschoolers) and find a group you can join. Seek out volunteer things that you have a real interest/passion for. There's likely to be others there to connect with since they care about the same thing as you. You have to be careful being a SAHM to find and seek out others (probably with some trial and errror) or you can really wind up feeling lonely, depressed, isolated, etc.

I agree, everyone needs a good circle of friends and how you dress is who you are! Where in TX did you relocate too?

Give it some time. You've been through lots of adjustments. Can you find a playgroup to join and meet some moms? Personally, I don't think you should change how you dress - sounds comfy to me. Be yourself and just keep trying some new things to meet people - you will. Hang in there.

Well...you are young! Can't change that. Get out and join some stuff: a church, a class, a book club, a gym.....any of those will increase your pool of "potential" girlfriends! Good luck.

Rachel said meetup.com. You should definitely try it!

I know exactly how you feel. I went through this whole thing with my husband when we lived in Amsterdam (where he is from). I would go out and make your own friends. You shouldn't feel obligated to be friends with your husband's friends. Go make your own! Find a mommy group around and maybe you can make some good friends through that. I am going through the same thing now that we are living in a new city again. It is understandable, and very hard!

I can definitely sympathize! I was the first of my group of friends to get married and have kids. I pretty much lost touch with most of them when I became a SAHM. When my oldest was about 18 mos, I joined a moms/playgroup. It was a lifesaver!! It really helped me through a tough couple of years. The group I was in was through meetup.com- you should check to see if there are any in your area. If you can't find anything through there, try to see if there is a MOPS playgroup nearby. You can make friends for yourself and your son. I ended up dropping out of the group I was in after about 2.5 years because it just wasn't a good fit anymore- but there are a handful of friends that I met that I still talk to/hang out with. My kids are in preschool/sports now, so that makes meeting people easier, but the playgroup was such a great tool to meet people when I thought it was impossible!

check the local library. they often have story time for children of certain ages. a lot of moms take their kids there to them.

I don't think it's your age, unless these women are really jealous or have other issues. I'm 34 as is my husband. His brother is 31 and his wife is 26. She is one of my best friends! Sure, we laugh at some of the things she doesn't know (old songs, movies, etc), but it's mutual and it certainly doesn't dominate the relationship.

As for meeting people, I don't know where Haslet is but I have always found groups on meetup.com. It's free. There is also MOPs and MOM's Clubs. One of them might have a group near you. I've also met people by going to library story time. And if you join a group and don't feel that you fit in, try another!! I've done that many times. My husband and I have moved a few times and each time it's taken me a while to finally find my group of friends :)

Check out the Library Story times or craft days

Look at your zip code on meetup.com for Mommy groups

Check out yahoo groups

See where the inside playgrounds are and go to them often.

You'll meet people!!

Definitely find a MOPS group or Moms' club somewhere. You can usually find them by searching on internet or contacting a local church. When my daughter was young, I found a Moms' group which led me to join a playgroup - saved my life and I met some great people. Plus, my daughter had great experiences also.

I found a mommy group in my area, and it has been great. We get together for playdates and every Thursday evening is craft night, where we just bring whatever craft we're working on and gab for a few hours. I love it. It started out with some girls meeting at a story time at the library. I ended up in it through a girl I used to work with. We're all different ages, from 25ish to 35ish, but our kids are all the same age so we bonded that way. maybe you could try www.meetup.com and see if any groups are meeting up in your area, or the library or something.

I think most mothers feel isolated. I have found that I really have to "put myself out there". I have always been more of an introvert, a homebody, a bit quiet and non-social. Then I started working from home, my husband worked 2 hours away and stayed out of town half the week, my best friend moved away and it was mostly just me and the kids. I became so desperate for a social life and as a result I really threw myself into making that happen.

Facebook helps a lot- I will post "who wants to hang out Monday?" or "Going to the pool tomorrow, if you want to come, give me a call!" There is usually someone interested, or they will schedule something else with us later in the week. It has really helped. Start reaching out to aquaintances and see if they want to get together, with or without the kids. Don't feel bad and give up if it doesn't work out the first (or second, or third!) times. People are busy, and stuff comes up. But if you keep reaching out, eventually you will find people you enjoy being around.

I think joining a class would help. What are you interested in? You could join a gym... pilates, yoga or kickboxing classes, or go do an art class. Volunteer... you can google "volunteer Texas" and there will most likely be a lot of options. Volunteering is a great way to meet people. Go to the park and go chat it up with some of the moms. They are probably just as lonely as you are. Have hubby watch the kids and go to a coffee shop by yourself, you may just meet someone, especially if you go to one that has live music going, as many do on Friday nights. Also, you could post flyers in your neighborhood (or start an online group at meetup.com) to form a playgroup. Or check Facebook to see if a group is already formed. My friend recently said he received a flyer on his door that people in the neighborhood were forming a social group to meet at the park on Sundays.

I think basically, it just takes getting out of your comfort zone a bit. But you can do it! I am still working on it... I wish I had more friends, but I also have developed a few close friendships over the last year and I am anything but bored these days, I can pretty much rely on finding someone to hang out with a few times a week. Good luck!

Don't dwell on the fact that your husbands friends aren't really yours. Make new ones.

Go to parks and public wading pools and places other young moms with their kids are. Is there a story time for babies/toddlers at your local library? Ours has them on Wednesday mornings, so it's easy to go out for a quick lunch with the kids afterwards. Try any "Mommy and Me" classes available. Go for walks with the baby in the stroller and see who's out there! (In the morning before the heat sets in, lol ; )

its not your age. ive never found out someones age and blown them off. I have gotten annoyed with someone that was young that was acting young. you'll know if thats the case, because you'll be talking about Jersey Shore or the Hills and you'll see the older womens eyes glaze over and THEN they blow you off! or you will find them talking down to you. I think more of it could be Hazlet, TX. As you know, It's a tiny, rural, farming, ranching community. You being a California girl, they may just not feel they have anything in common with you. Or be intimidated by you

. I think to make friends, you have to go do some things you like and you will find people there that like the same things you do. Go workout. Take a class. hang out at a b ookstore or coffee shop. Do You! but be open to the people around you, rather than keeping to yourself.

Well I can't hang out with you, I haven't developed a working transporter yet. Driving would take way too long.

But I can relate. My family and friends are out in Kansas. My husband and I are out in Illinois. He has friends and I lack friends 'locally'. I run a home daycare, so it's not like I get to socialize at work. Can't afford any hobbies, such as line dance lessons.

But I could suggest story time (for the little one and yourself) at the library (other parents tend to be there). Or take a knitting class, or pottery, or line dancing.. anything you're interested in and can afford in this economy.

But all in all, I have no real help. Church maybe? I'm not a church goer, so I couldn't say. Local parks, local walking trails. If you go walking at the same time everyday, you might stumble across someone else who does and make yourself a walking partner if nothing else.

I don't know, but if you find a solution, please pass it on.

Hi There,

The way you feel is very understandable.. and you are definately not alone.

One suggestion may be "meet up" groups at meetup.com... they are geographically oriented groups that share interests.. maybe a walking group, or another young moms group.. or a "food interest group".. "raw food" maybe?

It is not easy .. but hopefully in time some type of genuine friendship may present itself in your life.. good luck!

My playgroup is on meetup.com and it's called #1 Playgroup of NW Ft. Worth. We have a few spots left if you're interested. We have a LOT of new moms with just one baby and then a lot of "older" moms with 2 or more, etc. I would say the average age is 30, but that's just a guess as I really don't know most people's ages. We do have 3 moms in their 40s (and I only know that because they have told me not because I asked, lol!) The rest, to me seem mid-late 20s and 30s (I'm 32). Our playdates are in the Haslet, Saginaw and some in Keller too, so we're really close to you (I'm in Haslet too). Anyways just a suggestiong. I would have NO friends if it weren't for the ones I've made through playgroup and, maybe it's just me, but I had NO luck making other "mom friends" by going to Little Gym, Storytime as I tried that first to see. I really recommend meetup to start, if you don't like our group there are lots others in the area too...good luck!! I know it's hard at first for sure!

I really do understand how you feel.. just from a different perspective, I had my kids late in life and I always felt older than the other Moms. but I did live out in Haslet for a while (and loved it) when my kids were still little and I ended up going to First Baptist Church of Keller (on 1709 near 377) they have a lot of programs for Moms. the newest is a Mom to Mom group that is very active, I don't know a lot of the details because my kids are older and in primary school now, and my schedule is different. but the M to M group is a great place to start. you can find info at the churches website www.fbckeller.org There are also several MOPS groups in the area, I've never tried them but people really seem to enjoy them.

as far as having the same "friends" as your hubby, my hubby and I are the same age and our friends are very different, rarely do we find a couple that we both like equally, so we both do stuff with each others friends. But I to have trouble finding "girlfriends" in the area, I've developed very few since my hubby and moved to Texas 15+ years ago. I have made a few friends but people move and we moved a few times too, so that meant starting over again. So I do understand, just from and older perspective, (I'm 46) but I still live near Haslet and if you'd like to meet up for coffee, PM me and we can meet up at Starbucks or Mc Donald's and who knows, maybe this old gal and you young thing just might have something in common.

It would be good for you to find some friends. A playgroup with your son is a great way to go to start developing some friendships. Meetup.com has a ton of groups everywhere and you can look for other SAHM playgroups that you and your son can go to during the day. A good one will have signup security measures so you are far less likely to wind up with a stalker. Our group has to talk to you on the phone and meet you and your children before you are allowed to join the group, plus other security measures. I understand about the age difference, my hubby is 11 years older than me. I have made some terrific, wonderful, lovely friendships in the 3 years I have been in this meetup and don't know what I would do without these ladies.

I'm so sorry! It is hard to make new friends when you move. Sounds like your friends before were work friends and maybe long term friends. I too was one of the 1st to get married and have babies, and yes, it makes it hard to connect with those long term friends when they are still going out and looking for guys and you are completely happy. That being said, it should be a little easier to find friends with the same interests as you b/c you'll probably start to be the friends of your kid's friends. So, look for mom groups, a MOPS group in your area, a mom's club, etc. Go to the park and story time with your son, you'll probably meet some other moms there that are in the same period of their lives. Once you meet someone you like, make it a point to get to know them say something like "the kids seem to get along, would you want to meet up another day for a playdate?" Or just ask her if she'd like to come over for coffee. It will be tons easier once your son is in school and you meet the moms in his class, but for now, just watch at the park, playground, library, and church and see what you can find. On another note, I'm surprised people's converstaions stop when they find out your age. I find that odd at 26. I'm 3-1/2 years younger than my hubby too, but once we were married with kids, we were more friends with other married with kids people, so it didn't matter. Some of my dearest friends are 45+ and it doesn't matter that I'm 36 b/c we all have kids the same age. Strange????

When I first started staying home I felt lonely and we didn't move. It just seemed like everyone was so busy with their jobs that I didn't quite fit in anymore. I joined a MOMS club and met some great friends. The best part was I found some great friends for my children too. The dues are only $25 for a year and we have all types of activities for the moms and kids. Our group has all kinds of moms too- older moms, young moms, moms with 1 child, moms with 4 kids. Check out http://www.momsclub.org/ and see if there is a group near you! Good luck to you!

Hi!
I searched on google and found this:
http://mommy-and-me.meetup.com/cities/us/tx/haslet/
http://new-and-expecting-moms.meetup.com/cities/us/tx/has...

Also, check out your local library. The librarian may know of something... or there could be pamphlets there from local groups.
good luck!

I would say that unless you are in the same area you grew up in you will encounter this problem. It is not easy making friends at 4 much less 24 or 34 or so on. And trust me we women under no circumstance are forgiving. We judge first meet later. Most women that is.
I agree with joining a moms group. MOMS Club is an international group and has several chapters throughout the world. http://www.momsclub.org/
Check the site to see if there is a chapter near you. Or MOPS is another group that has several chapters...http://www.mops.org/
You can check groups on Meetup.com or yahoogroups.com
You live far from me so getting together would be difficult. I hope that this information helps.
As for the not liking part, well I'm sure we all have come across those. I mean we're women right?!
Just keep looking for a playmate for you and your son. You both will be happy. You can email me if you just want to chat and vent.