Fear of Pottys

You know, ever since my child has learned of the impending new comer, she's refused to go potty in the potty. It might be a reason if you have an infant. I would just say ride it out. We are going to start again when we get into a new schedule with the baby. Everything I've read says this is typical. So maybe their right? Good luck, Jen

HI C.,

I can only hope that this is a normal reaction as my son has responded the same way. I pushed for a few weeks and that didn't work either. For now, he is in pull ups and if we get there on time and he feels like going he goes.

I am not sure how much this influenced my son or whether your son watches the show, "Baby Looney Tunes" but there was an episode about a "water genie" and I think that scared him. I tell my son to pee on the water genie and he likes that.

From what I heard it is a longer process for boys. So far, we have been working on it for 2 months.

Take care,
K. (3 year old son and due in Oct with 2nd baby)

Buy a fold up travel thingy that fits over an adult size toilet-- be sure to use it at home, too, so he gets used to it first

Carry a pad of Post It sticky paper in your purse/diaper bag-- put one over the sensor for auto flush toilets to keep it from flushing while you're in the stall

At home, toss a couple of Cherios in the toilet and see if he can pee on them! Boys love this! It helps to work on their aim, too! If it works, be sure to have a baggie of them in your diaper bag for when you aren't home

Let him pee outside, if that's something you're OK with. My son liked to pee outside and any time we were driving somewhere, he would rather pull over and find a tree/bush than hold it until we found a bathroom

Well there are plenty of things to be scared on in public restrooms especially when they are used to either using a little potty or a potty seat at home.
I would suggest trying a couple of things depending on what he is used to. They make a travel potty seat that folds up that you an put over a toilet so there is less fear of falling in.
Here's an example:
http://www.amazon.com/PRIMO-Folding-Potty-Handles-granite...
They also make a travel potty that you may want to try in the stalls at first to get him over his fear (especially if he is used to a little potty at home). Once you get him using that with no fear in the restroom you can then get him to try the "big" potty. Here's an example of a travel potty:
http://www.amazon.com/PRIMO-Folding-Potty-Handles-granite...
When he does use the big potty-- bring post it notes with you to put over the electronic sensors so the toilet doesn't flush on it's own while he is on the potty--which can also be very scary.
Finally, bring rewards with you on the go. Stickers, m&ms, whatever--and use them for each baby step he takes including going into the stall or just trying. This way he will want to keep trying and will want to get over his fears.

He's old enough to talk, so take a lot of time and have conversations with him. Meanwhile, keep him in regular underwear. It's possible he's had a nightmare, or a difficult bowel movement. If he's with other people at all, find out if anything unusual happened when he was going potty there. Hopefully soemthing will come out of your discussions with him.

C.,

I have 3 children, the youngest my only son. When it came to potty training the girls were a breeze. Praise was plenty. My son would hide behind the couch, do his business, and then ask to be changed, because he did not like sitting in it. I tried EVERYTHING. Stickers, M&M's, begging, praying. (Diapers for 2 takes a chunk out of the budget). Anyway, my son loved cars and trucks. I bought $9 worth of matchbox cars @ 88 cents a piece. A great investment.

Every time he would successfully make a deposit, he could open the car of his choice. I knew he had mastered complete control when he would make a partial deposit,choose a car then go back 5 minutes after playing with the car and finish the job, then look for another matchbox!

Once we moved to big boy pants, i would reward him with other things to motivate him and keep him focused.

Don't get too stressed. He will come around. But also don't enable him to fail too easily. Once you 2 are ready to work on Potty training, GO FOR IT! Dump the diapers. Watch what time he has his last drink at night so he can have dry mornings. I still make my 9 year old go to the bathroom before he goes to bed no matter how tired he his. It is better than seeing him so disappointed in himself first thing in the morning, and then having to deal with the clean up!

GOOD LUCK. Hope this helps.

I'm potty training our twins...and my daughter is done...and my son is almost there. I don't remember fear of the actually toilets, except for like Sarah mentioned...so we "block it"...that a big deal, then they feel safe. I do have a girlfriend that told me her son had separation issues from his BM and she explained that that's where the BM wanted to be...at the party with his brother's BM, etc...I know it sounds goofy, but if you can get your son excited that he's doing the right thing...it may work. For my son, bribery works the best. He gets a sugar free gummy bear after he BM's in the toilet...Best of luck & God Bless you. B.

Hi C.,

My two year old daughter's five year old brother is the one who came up with this idea and its effect was amazing. We found the movie "Winston's Potty Chair" (can't underline this) at the library and our daughter loved it so much she watched it all the time and immediately started using her potty. Hope this helps!

If it is public restrooms he is a afraid of, my daughter went thru the same thing. There were two issues with her....

1. She was afraid she would fall in. I had always put her on sideways at public restrooms and straight on at home. The way she was sitting on the potty made all the difference. when she was on straight, she felt more comfortable. Maybe u can try that. ~or~ take one of those seats with u that u just pop on to the big seat to make it smaller/toddler sized. Let him pick out the cushion. They also come with the cover for his thing. I cannot tell you how many times i walked into WalMart with that in a WalMart bag...my girl loved putting a sticker on the bag (or on the seat itself) and then the person would give her and her baby brother each a sticker, too.

2. AUTOFLUSH toilets are the freakiest thing in the world to a child. I mean, just imagine trying to take care of business and all of a sudden the hear a huge woosh, your tush gets chilled and the water splashes up, hitting your poor tushy. That is so freaky!! I had to start putting my hand over the sensor (you can also drape toilet paper over the ones that are not in the wall) so that it wouldn't flush her hiney. Now public restrooms are a breeze!!

These are the two main issues my daughter had. Hope this is helpful!