My newly 2 year old son (an Identical twin boy) has been waking up anywhere from 1:30 - 3am. From this point it will be 4+ hours of him coming out of his room every 10 min or so. I tried the whole don't say a word, put him back to bed, tuck him in and leave the room method. Failure. IVe tried a sip of water... Ive tried sitting beside his bed. That didn't work. He just stared at me wide awake. I've tried to just sit in the corner of his room and everytime he got up out of bed, I put him back... over and over again. He is in his room just rolling around, he comes out occasionally... and we walk him back to his bed. He is happy, no crying. His diaper is ok. I gave him a sip of water. He wakes up between 6:30 and 7am every day. He takes a nap from 2-4, no later. Wont go to bed until 9pm. (We start the bedtime routine at 7:30). What gives? The home is quiet, no street noise. He has a white noise machine. Twin brother in the same room isn't making a peep and sleeping well. There are no toys in his room, we lock the closet so he can't get any books or toys out. How is this 2 year old not tired?? I am 28 years old and exhausted!! *oh and I also have a newly 4 year old that I have to get up at 6:30 am to get ready for preschool...
wow, thanks for all the input! This is my first time using any type of website like this... so far Im liking it!
So, last night I put the boys to bed at 7:30, I had to stay in their room until 8:15 until they were almost asleep. (not ideal, but they just climb back and forth into each others beds and jump around if Im not in there). They were asleep by 8:30. And sure enough, big brother (a whole 6 min older, haha) came out at 1:00am. He whined as I tried to put him back in his bed, which of course woke his brother up. So here I was, 1am... two upset tots climbing on my lap wanting to be comforted, and fighting for space on my lap. (did I mention my husband works until 2am?, so I don't have another pair of arms.) I managed to get little brother back to bed on the couch rubbing him with my foot while I rubbed the other brothers back. So at about 2am they were both asleep, ON THE COUCH. Great.. so I gently moved them back to bed with success. But then again big brother was out wandering around at 3am. This went on until 4:30am. The entire time he was happy as can be, laughing and rolling on his bed, head between his legs, only cried when I insisted he lay down. I cried out of sheer exhaustion. ;-)
I made sure to give them a lot of physical activities during the daytime, and a good dinner with protein included. Then I took the snack advice and gave them a little toast with peanut butter on it, then they got their warm milk. They napped well that day, went down pretty easy. I moved the nap up a bit to 1 o'clock, but they didn't sleep until 1:30. 1 o'clock is really the earliest I can shoot for - my 4 year old is in preschool until 12:30 and I pick her up with the boys.
I get such mixed advice about the naps... and quite honestly, I cannot imagine not having that 1 or 2 hour break in the day, just with my daughter to focus on and do my work (I work from home part time). My daughter napped until 3 and just gave it up herself.
Ive heard of people putting a gate up in their doorway but my husband gets home at 2am and needs to unwind a bit before going to sleep, so if the door isn't shut, I'd be afraid they would see the lights on and hear him.
currently their beds are simply mattresses on the floor. I have baby proofed the room and reluctantly agree with the moms that say - let him wander around his room until he's exhausted and then he can climb back in bed... I say reluctant because its not as simple with twins... another tot in the room to bug and wake up... and there is no option to separate them by different rooms. And I don't co-sleep with the boys for a few reasons - 1. they are already 2 and I don't want to start a new habit this far into it, 2. Its difficult on my sleep to have a little one stirring around in bed next to me. And 3. I can't imagine him starting to co sleep without the other twin wanting to do it as well. and 4. my daughter comes into bed every night at like 3am, and she snuggles with her papa. There is just not enough room for us all. haha
Tonight -
They went to sleep tonight at 8:30. A great time for us, wow what a relief. I followed the same routine as always and they had an energetic day and good hearty meal and warm milk. We will see what the night holds for us....
I'd start tweeking that nap time. Not so long and maybe start earlier. It won't be convenient but I'd bet that would help a lot. Or maybe eliminate the nap altogether unless you think he'd be a bear to deal with...Good luck!
he doesn't need a nap. my kids give up their nap just at 2. they then sleep a nice solid 12 hours every night. you will need to move bedtime up, so he can get 12 hours a night. Instead of a nap, do a video for some down time.
Oh, toddlers are so good at this! I agree with what both commentators (commenters?) have written.
Give a small snack before bedtime so that your son's tummy has a little something in it. For a while, cut down on the nap time, or cut it out altogether; if he does sleep during nap time, wake him up. Put him to bed at the regular time - no earlier.
It's not going to be fun - but it isn't fun right now, either, and it may help his body clock reset. You can also tell him it's his job to sleep all night, but since he's just barely two years old I don't think he's just trying to pull one on you. He's just in the habit.
For what it's worth, one of my granddaughters used to get up in the middle of the night and walk around the house when she was about four. Her parents asked her why she did that, and she said, "I like to see what the house looks like in the dark."
It is possible that there is a blood sugar drop occurring. If someone does have a blood sugar drop, it will usually occur around 2-3 am. The brain needs blood sugar to survive, so the body will kick in the backup mechanism to raise blood sugar , which is adrenaline. Adrenaline makes you wide awake. Does he eat differently that the other child (more carbs/dairy?) does he crave sweeter type foods? Are they fraternal or identical? Has he ever had additional or different medication that the twin? You can try this- give him a spoon full of RAW ,VIRGIN coconut oil before bed. That can help keep blood sugar steady...then see if the sleeping habits change. Also, it is true that once something wakes the child and a habit like that starts, it's hard to get them to stop waking at the same time. The body is a creature of habit and it WANTS to keep itself on a schedule, even if that schedule is weird. Cutting the daytime nap may help him become tired enough to 'break' the cycle, then you can probably re-introduce the nap, but maybe shorter and put him down by noon and have him be up by 1:30 or 2 at the latest.
I know it sucks, but drop the nap, or at least shorten it.
Does he eat a good snack at night? If not try that before bed. He may be hungry. I would put a gate across his door and let him roll around and thrash around. Tell him night night, put him to bed and if he gets up say nope and now the gate goes up. And put it up. you may have a couple nights of him crying at the gate. it won't last. kids go thru this but you have now big trained to go and spend hours with him in the middle of the night. cause what kid doesn't want mommys total attention by himself in the night? don't do it. and I would not give drinks of water either in the night.
I studied early childhood development. Then I trained and worked in a daycare. One thing I learned is that young children have a tremendous amount of energy.
They could play non stop for hours at a time. And they needed this play to include a LOT of very active play. Running, hopping, climbing, stretching, peddling, swinging jumping, screaming and laughing..
In a day care situation they would be dropped off in the mornings from 7 - 9:00. And they would be out on the playground that entire time. Come in have some juice and then play inside at centers.. Then do an activity. Have a story time, wash hands, faces and have lunch.. Usually lunch was served at 11:30. Then a nap.. Usually at noon, until 2:00, then wash up, have a small snack, and inside play, maybe a craft, and then by 3:30- usually closer to 4:00 outside to play until they were picked up..
I know when our children are home all day, we do not always have time for them to be outside for those lengths of time, we have errands, we have chores, but they really, really need to be able to get rid of all of that energy.
Figure out a way for you to allow them to have active play for lengths of time. Make sure they are active things. For inside get a a slide, some trikes, a wagon, if you have room a big box that they can crawl through. Make tunnel by taping boxes together.
Put on music and all of you dance together, spin, hop, gallop.. They are getting to an age, that you can start teaching them so cool moves.
Notice nap is way earlier than their current nap. 2:00 is really too late in the day if you want them to go to sleep at a good hour. Children this age should be in bed by 8:00 at the latest.
Make sure they eat a good hearty dinner and may even need a little snack before. I used to remind my husband , the length of time you wind her up it will take double that time to calm her down,
Bath and PJ's, Make nighttime bath time a quiet time. This is not a time to be loud and crazy, keep the lights low, voices low.. No loud TV's, loud Phone calls.. Have soothing music and low lights in their bedrooms, speak softly with each other. While bathing the, use nice strong strokes, like a massage, this will totally wear them out and relax them.
Dry them off the same way. Quietly dry them off with strong massaging strokes.
You can read them a quiet story, but do not engage them.. Once they are in bed, unless they are crying, do not open their door. If your son ends up sleeping on the floor, so be it, he will be fine,
If you drop the nap, for this son, be prepared for meltdowns at the end of the day, but keep in mind why he is whiny.
Most of the kids in daycare still took naps unil they were 4. But was also ran them ragged, with all of the play, dancing, running around..
Every child is different. When my daughter was 2 she did not take a nap, went to bed at 10:30pm and work up with the sun. Every child requires different amounts of sleep. You can try cutting nap time down to one hour. Maybe do the nap from 12:30 to 1:30.
1. I agree with trying a different naptime routine.
2.Is there ANY changes in life you can think of that he can pick up on...any at all (even if you think they are small)?
My son only does this when he is overtired. example. there was a day I had to drive far and coming was inpossible. Son didn't nap, usually 3 hr napoer at time. Been up 11 hours. So put him to bed at 9. He wakes up at 3am ready to go. He only does this when he doesn't get enough or good enough rest. Naps are usually needed til 4/5.. cutting them out at this age doesn't make sense. He'll be chronically overtired. Mine's 3.5 and still naps 2 hrs. If he forgoes the nap he never makes it up and it takes a couple days to get him back on track.
I would suggest cutting out the nap and see if that makes a difference. If not, as long as he's happy and doesn't disturb anyone, not sure what else you can do (if you do not want to cosleep).
I agree that waking up is a habit. I know that if I wake up one night and use the bathroom, I will start waking up every night to use the bathroom. As soon as I force myself to stay in bed and not go to the bathroom, the next night I don't even wake up. It's just a habit. So, perhaps you can set your alarm and go in to his room around that time before he wakes up and try to keep him from getting out of bed. Maybe one night of just not getting up will help.
I also believe that he's too young to cut out naps. I am in awe of those who say they stopped naps at 2. I am a mother of one, step mom of two, and have eight grandchildren and they ALL napped until age 4 or 5.
I would work him harder during the day. Spend more time running around outside (sledding, playing in the snow, go to the park even though it is winter, go to the mall playground if you can't). I would not take away his nap. My son napped through age five and needed it. Nine is a reasonable bedtime especially since it sounds like he doesn't need to get up early in the morning (just chooses too). You could also put a mattress/pad and blanket on the floor in your room and let him stay there if he wants to (only if he lays quietly, not if he wants to play).
