Defriending on Facebook

No, it does not. You can also hide them or restrict them if you don't want to defriend them. Sometimes friendships are situational and you only stay friends as long as the situation remains the same.

I agree with just hiding them. Defriending can leave a really bad taste.

I would just "hide" them so all that stuff doesn't pop up on your wall.

I was in a similar situation several years ago - altho, we didn't have Facebook back then - I moved and eventually just stopped being in the mom's group. They don't seem to want to keep "long-distance" friendships going. It hurt my feelings but it was getting harder and harder for me to keep traveling back and forth so I was ok with letting go.

If you hide them, they won't know it - but you can still message each other if/when needed. Plus, you can still look at their "walls" if you want to.

Good luck!!!

No they will not be notified. Why don't you just "Hide" them? This way they are there in case they want to get a hold of you or you want to get a hold of them, but you will not see their posts all of the time.

friends come and go in our lives. I had very best friends I worked with, or went to school with and then as time went along and our lives changed, we just did not keep in touch. does not mean we would not love to see them, but they are just not as available as they once were..

But then through new jobs, new location, as our children get involved with their interests or schools, we meet all new people..

It is all very organic and we just go with it. it is nothing personal, it is just how it goes sometimes.

Mom:

If you unfriend someone on facebook - it does NOT send out any notification to them. Nor will it if you block them.

If you are feeling hurt - then you need to either let your voice be heard and tell them their slights are hurting you - or you just delete them and walk away. If they notice you are "missing" and send you a message to find out what's up - you can tell them then.

However - if it were me? IF I felt strongly enough about it - I would voice my opinion...however...since you have noticed that they are your "Friends" then I would delete and be done. Life is much easier that way.

You are not being stupid. You felt like you were friends with these people and you are finding out they really aren't. So why bother? Unless you're looking for some grand exit? Just delete and move on!!!

You moved 30 minutes away & left the mom's group. I guess I'm confused as to why you'd be upset that you're not included in things? It's natural for people to hang out with those that live closer vs. farther. What about making friends where you live now?

Have you reached out to them to hang out? Called them? If not, then you're putting just as much effort into the friendship as they are. If you are only communicating on FB, then I don't consider that a real friendship, honestly. I think it's the lazy way out of taking the time & effort that real friendships need to survive.

Please keep in mind that FB is just that - FB and not real life. If you are feeling insecure about the friendships, then it's probably time to hide their posts or take a break from FB.

So, I guess my answer to you is, only delete IF you plan on never speaking to or seeing them again. FB doesn't notify anyone. However, they may notice you deleted them.

I had a falling out with some "friends" I had made on a local mom's forum/play group & I ended up deleting them, as well as everyone from the group that was on the FB list. I wasn't close with any of them & hardly knew them. I had no problem doing that because the forum was pretty toxic.

it doesn't tell them, but in this situation i might just block them from view. then you didn't "defriend" them, but it doesn't have to hurt your feelings every day to see their comments back and forth.

I gues it depends.

I had your same situation when we moved 4 yrs ago. We also moved about 40 min away, but I knew I would not keep in touch them them in a meaningful way. We wouldn't be making the effort to drive to them for play dates and I knew they would not come to me. Although, I did not consider them real friends, but people I was friendly with. I unfriended them from my FB because I knew I'd never see them again anyway. Maybe unfriending them would make me the topic of gossip or discussion at the next group, but what did I care? I wouldn't be there to find out.

If you think you will seem them again, or get together, you need to keep them as friends.

Do they comment in a friendly way on your stuff? Do they post on your wall or initiate message to you? If not, then they probably won't notice, or care, if you defriend them. Sorry to say.

I know how you feel and I think it's best just to cut the cord and focus on relationships in your current world. Hugs.

But... you moved and aren't in the group any longer. Of COURSE you're not being included in the group stuff. Simply being friends on FB doesn't mean you're still part of the group. FB gives a false sense of actually still being friends. They have no responsibility to make you feel part of the group or included because, well, you're not part of the group. YOU are the one that left THEM... so the responsibility would be on you to maintain contact and write them messages and try to meet up with them in a way that's convenient to them. Although to be honest, I would just get involved in a different local-to-you-now group.

I realize that sounds harsh, but it's not meant to be. If you have one or two particular people that are friends that you talk to on the phone from that group, then maintain contact with them and defriend everyone else from FB. What you can't see can't hurt you, and what you can't see them doing means you can't see what you think you're being excluded from.

Have you considered writing on their walls, or injecting yourself into the conversations in very easy ways? Lots of "likes", little remarks, nothing important or earth shattering, but letting them know that you are there?

I would not tell them that your feelings are hurt. They will think you are acting like a child. That doesn't mean that you are acting like a child, just so you understand me here. It just means that you wouldn't look good saying it to them.

If you only live 30 minutes away, try to continue to see some of the group. You might realize when you see them, that there is nothing different. They may just be used to writing to the same ole posters, and aren't used to having you there. Don't delete them. Slide in gently and see how things go.

Dawn

I have been known to hide things people post. They don't know about it and I don't have to look at it. But it doesn't bother me when others have a conversation I'm not part of. I don't de-friend very much, but I don't think people are told when they're de-friended. I am not notified when someone leaves FB altogether, so I don't think anyone would be notified about being de-friended. Go ahead and do what you please.

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