Daughter Having Nightmares - Any Suggestions or Advise?

Usually a stuffed animal or a doll that is a "robot stopper" or "robot protector" As long as she sleeps in her room it protects her. Keep it on a shelf, so eventually she'll forget about it.

This might be silly, but could you show her the animated movie "Robots?" The robots in this one are pretty much silly and friendly.

I got dream catchers and any other magical looking things and told my daughter in detail what they were for. That seemed to help. She would ask the dream catchers every night to take her bad dreams and leave the good ones. Good luck, it's a hard one! C.

My suggestions sound ridiculous, I know, but they seem to work for us. My 5.5 year old also has a wild imagination, and has had nightmares pretty frequently over the past year and a half.

What I do is to give her "fairy dust" every night. It is invisible to children, and all mommies and daddies carry it in their pockets at all times. Just a little sprinkle over her head at bedtime will keep the bad dreams away!

One other thing we decided to try was a small sachet of lavender under her pillow. Someone told me that lavender oil helps ensure a more restful sleep. I don't know if it's true, but I will say that since we started with the sachet under her pillow, she has not gotten up at night for additional fairy dust. So maybe there is something to it?

Good luck. It just breaks my heart when my kids are afraid; I hope you find a trick that works for you.

Let her watch more nurturing, emotionally strengthening shows instead. This is why I mostly stay away from walt disney- it is almost purely entertainment with very little emotional strengthening visuals and moods. I think one cannot be picky enough- if you choose to even watch any tv! Honor her feelings if she does get scared. Battling emotional demons is part of the human make-up, but don't bring it on during such fragile ages, if possible. I also always watch what my son does, so I see what he is getting. All the best to you.

Hi. I strongly recommend that parent's avoid that movie. My friend's daughter had problems being afraid someone was going to break into their house and harm them after watching it. They had to buy a house alarm. My daughter watched it after my friend's daughter (I didn't know about friend's daughters reaction at the time). My daughter had a strong reaction to the movie, while it was on, she started to call out to us, and we were sitting right there. She had this strange look on her face and we could tell she was really freaked out. The images are to realistic and fast moving. I've heard that kids that are smart realize that there are dangers out there when they watch this movie, while others (not saying they are not smart) are not into processing the images in the same manner, are unfazed by it. It could be that at a certain developmental stage, it's a more disturbing movie. I wish I had known about this movie and how some kids have responded to it before I allowed it into our house. I think it's pure junk! We've never had a problem with any other movie, so what's in there??? Makes you wonder! As for suggestions, I don't have much to offer, but someone told me you can make a potion of monster (robot) spray (just water and whatever) and tell your daughter it corrodes the robots.

My daughter had a period of nightmares too. One thing that worked for us was "monster spray". I filled up a small spray bottle of water and pretended to spray it all around her room before she went to bed to protect her from the monsters, or robots in your daughter's case. Some nights she would do it herself. Also, she happened to have a large dog stuffed animal that was her protector that sat on the end of her bed to ward off any monsters. Something else that might work is a special ring or paper crown she might think is magical and would help protect her at night.

Hi M..

My son had nightmares every night for three months when he was 4 years old. He would actually see people in his room. I was losing my mind not getting sleep and having just had my second child. It exhausted me and I worked full-time, and my husband worked graveyard, so he wasn't home to help. This all happened after seeing Halloween costumes in a store. Be very careful about what their little eyes see. It really affects them.

We believe in prayer and I taught him that he has the authority to tell the demons to go away. Of course at first he was afraid to do that, so I would have to go in every night to pray for him. He also had a teddy bear that comforted him. We actually had the police out because the neighbors complained about hearing a child scream every night. I think you are doing the right thing all though I feel for you and your loss of sleep. This too shall pass. Continue to love him and pray with him so he knows there is hope.

She hasn't had any traumatic experiences lately? I had terrible nightmares for years after my brother died when I was 5, and I'm not sure how that could have been remedied. I would become so terrified I would throw up. The only thing that would help at all was being comforted and reassured by my mother, other than that there was no way to stop them. Just keep comforting her, she will grow out of them. (I grew out of them at 12, but like I said, my trauma was huge and your daughter will probably outgrow them long before 12.)
Oh, and just be careful what movies she sees. I know some of my nightmares were around movies I'd seen, but since they were not necessarily scary movies it can't always be avoided.

When my son went through something similar, I had him draw what he was afraid of and also talked to him after he fell asleep and told him he was safe. Both things helped but time was what worked best.

Hi M.! am concerned about your daughter having nightmares about robots. Maybe you should check the kind of movies they view in the TV especially when they are by themselves; they may not yet be able to distinguish between fantasy and the reality;anyway rest assured of my prayers for your daughter.

srluz,dc

Hi M.,
If you are in the Sacto area, tune in to 650 am radio on a Sat night between 8 pm and midnight. You can call in and MS. Stephanie Doren will help you with this nightmare stuff. She has training and degrees in this sort of thing and can tell you EXACTLY what to do for you child depending upon the kind of dream... and then they stop. Your daughter is not dreaming about it because of a movie she saw. She is dreaming these images for a reason. and USING the images that she saw to give herself an answer to something. NIghtmares aren't all bad and they don't mean that something bad has happened or is going to happen. Ms. Doren will explain. Maybe you will listen a while until you feel comfortable about calling in. Tell her you are a first time listener and a first time caller. You are going to be amazed. I have been a listener to this program for many many years and I trust Stephanie with my dreams. Tell her S. sent you... you won't be sorry, and your daughter will be sleeping well and enjoying her dreams from now on.
S.

Does she sleep with a nightlight on? We used majic dust for our son. I literally took a small plactic tupperware container, drew a picture of a flower on the lid. At night I would open the container and sprinkle majic dust all over his room and his bed. He would tell me special places he needed it, like the closet, etc. We would also be sure to sprinkle his pillow. WE would ssay how it would keep bad dreams away and help him sleep through the night. Worked for us.

Hi M.,
My daughter is 2 1/2 yrs old and we were recently given a lot of Disney movies. I have always loved The Lion King and used to watch it with my nephews (16+ yrs ago) and wanted to watch it with my daughter. I never realized how scary these movies are! I figured if the rating was G then it must be okay for her. NOT A CHANCE! We watched a few minutes of it and she became terrified. My daughter also has a very vivid imagination and when I spoke with her pediatrician, he said that young children have a very hard time distinguishing between reality and pretend. He recommended waiting on those types of movies until 5-6 yrs old. My daughter LOVES the movie Milo & Otis but we fast-forward through all the scary parts. I L. the idea of a spray bottle with monster repellent! I've watched the Incredibles and found it a little scary myself. I had terrible nightmares as a child. I believe it was from the books I used to read. Think Cujo!
Good luck!
L.

You have many great suggestions already but also try making sure she doesn't have any caffeine during the day and then make sure she empties her bladder fully before bedtime. Good luck to you.

Hi M.!

Well, you poor things are definitely not getting enough sleep lately.
My oldest boy had "Night Terror's", but it doesn't sound like that's what she's having.

My youngest son had a "nightmare thing" going one time when he was 4. It was after we watched the Iron Giant. Cute movie, actually, but he thought it WAS possible to have giant Robots like that in OUR world. No matter how much I tried to tell him that the Iron Giant was a really great "drawing" for a cartoon, he would still have nightmare's about robots.

I finally "played along"....I told him that robots are only make believe, and can only work with a remote control (something he could definitely relate to). My son would lay in his bed, and I would come in with 2 AA Batteries (new or old). I told him to close his eyes and pretend to put these new batteries into his "Robot Remote" before he falls asleep. I always reminded him that HE was in control of the Remote AND the Robot. I would ask him "I wonder how fast you can make the robot swim" or "I wonder if he can do the hokey pokey" or "I wonder if he knows his Alphabet song" or whatever else I could think of spontaneously :o)

All these things taught him that HE controlled the robot, and soon he began to wake up ready to tell me what he made the Robot do. The nightmares wore off after he realized that he was in control.

Well, it worked for me anyway :o) Kind of silly, I know, but "whatever works".

Good Luck, M.

:O) N.

When my now 5 1/2 year old daughter was having nightmares (courteous of an older friend playing a game where they "saw ghosts" in a window) I would tell my daughter that we only played "ghost" downtstairs and only during the day. I wanted to acknowledge her fear without supporting it. I felt it was important to not engage in the fantasy of ghosts or monsters. I would simple tell her that monsters and ghosts were something we could pretend when we play, but they they were not real. If she wanted me to look in the closet or under the bed I would while calmly reminding her again that they were not real. This really helped my daughter, as it put limits and parameters to the her scary thoughts and active imaginations. As a side note, more recently she has been coming into our room at night saying she had a nightmare. After a few tired nights of letting her crawl in bed with me, it started to become a habit. I realized that more than anything she just wanted to sleep with me. She wanted to keep repeating the behavior to keep getting the treat of sleeping in our room. And, while I have to admit I love that she wants to be with me at night, neither of us sleep when she is in bed with me. So, now I walk her back to bed with a quick kiss. And back to sleep we go. Also, I agree with the previous suggestion to closely monitor what your child watches. What our kids find scarey can seem rather minor to our eyes. Not only watch the movies for scary content, but watch your child's reaction to what the see. I know my daughter will often not appear frightened, but will seem overly interested in something she's seen. Asking lots of questions, and seeming very concerned about a certain concept. This has been my experience. I hope you and your daughter find the right solution, and that you both are sleeping soundly soon.

Hi,
I have a five year old that had nightmares nightly, I bought some sweet dream spray and sprayed it every night before bed and told him that it got rid of all the bad dreams, since then we have run out of scary spray and now use febreeze because i cant find the scary spray to purchase anymore and it works like a charm.

Hi M.,
My daughter is 7 years old now, and still has the occasional nightmare, but when she was your daughters age and would be scared to go to sleep at night, one thing that worked for her was big giant stuffed animals. She had a huge stuffed bunny and a giant teddy bear that she would put on either side of her in bed and she slept very well with these protective buddies. She still uses her giant teddy bear to sleep next to at night. My other advice, and something I still do for my daughter if she has a scary dream is to let her sleep in my bed next to me for a night or two. She always seems to get over the bad dreams after getting to sleep next to me for a few nights. But the stuffed animals really worked for her! Hope maybe that will help!

When my daughter was little, her nightmare demons were sharks! It was horrible. I told her that she could take control of that. That, even though she was sleeping, she could still take action against it, that the next time it happened, imagine defending herself. "When you see the shark, picture yourself picking up a baseball bat and swinging it at the shark. Hit at it until it goes away and leaves you alone."
She thought that was funny, but I told her that when I dream and get scared, I tell myself to stop and think,
"this is only a dream, it is not real." It has worked for me, ever since. AND, it worked for her. I think it took a couple of nights and I would reinforce the idea that she could defend herself against them. I went into great detail about "bopping them on the head and smacking them in the butt", and then one day she woke up and told me all about how the sharks came and she beat them all up. She was actually laughing about how funny it was. How surprised the shark was that she took action against them. That pretty much did it for the nightmares.
People don't realize that they can stop themselves in a dream and change what happens, but you can. She had always watched me play softball, so she understood the swinging of the bat. Maybe in your case a different method of defense would be just as good. Something that she understands would protect her when she is threatened....even if it's just YOU coming into the dream and chasing away the robots. I think children just feel defenseless. Does something in particular lead up to the dreams? Maybe that'll be the clue on stopping them.
Good Luck

Perhaps you can buy her a little robot toy or two, and she can play with them or you can play with her to help her process her fears. She can be in control with the doll, and it's much smaller than her so her fears may diminish too. Good luck.

my girls also have vivid imaginations and sensitivity to visual things (fortunatley they know their own limits and won't watch anything they think will be scary), and what helped for us was to harness their imaginations for positive things. One of my girls is fascinated with honeybees and knows quite a bit about bees, so I had her favorite bee finger puppet tell her that she used to be afraid of scary dreams but now the "dream guard bees" protect her thoughts from scary dreams. Then the bee puppet buzzed around her pillow to put her special "bee scent" there so that the "dream guard bees" would be around my daughter's pillow while she slept.

Whenever a movie gives one of our kids nightmares, I take that as a sign that they are not ready/old enough for it. We don't watch that particular movie again for another 6-12 months. The nightmares usually didn't continue for more than two weeks.

It would be a good idea to talk with your child's doctor, my son who is now 8 went through a very rough long period where I thought he was having nightmares, but it was night terrors and after working through a lot of different things with his doctor and with Prayer every night he has NO more night terrors or nightmares.

Did you tell her you believe in her and ask her what you can do to help her?

I have a 4 yr old granddaughter who has the same problem. My 16 yr old grandson loves spooky movies and it leaves my granddaughter in tears. I try to keep her away when he is watdching those kinds of movies. I got her her own little DVD player and she watches her Land Before Time and her Dora the EXplorer and her Barbie movies. She is getting better with the nightmares. It isn't a fast change but gradual but it works.
Good Luck

My daughter is the same way. She actually can sleep walk and have full conversations in her sleep. What I try to do is before bed, I do our routine, and then I tell her that I will be checking on her all night. On the nights I remember to tell her that (doing it is another story, lol) she seems to be much more relaxed and sleeps well. If I let her stay up just a little later, or if we are rushed at bed time, it seems to be disruptive to her and she seems to have nightmares on those nights. I think it mostly has to do with them feeling comfortable and safe. So as long as we reassure them and keep doing it, it will pass. My daughter is 5 now and it is getting a lot better. Good Luck!

You could have her watch the Iron Giant. It has a good robot in it. Explain that some robots are good and some are bad and it depends on the PERSON who made the robot. Also explain that it's ALL PRETEND. They are just stories that people make up for fun! There's also a robot cartoon, I don't remember what it's called, but that may be fun to watch with her.These ideas require you to be with her to explain things. It could be she believes that huge terrible robots are real and she's worried one will come up to her house and crush it.

Let her know that she is safe and at home with people who love her and keep her safe. Give her water (it helps return her to reality). Do not respond to the nightmare, just hold her and tell her repeatedly she's all right, that she's safe at home with her family that loves her. Have a dim light on, keep her door open, and have soothing sounds on, such as soothing music or a gentle rain CD, something to keep her mind focused on while she falls asleep.

Help her think of happy thoughts. Playing in the sandbox, swimming, playing at the park, rainbows, whatever it is she likes.

Keep a consistent bedtime routine. This will help her trust and believe you when you tell her she's safe. Read storybooks that are happy filled and fun. And help her to have GOOD thoughts in her mind, such as reading something fun. What's at the forefront of your mind when you fall asleep often appears in your dreams.

She'll need something to sleep with. My four year old daughter (who's had nightmares daily, can you tell?) has some bears she can hug while sleeping, and I've also given her one of my hair ribbons. It smells like me, and it belongs to me and so she hugs it close to her as well as the bear. It helps her relax to have something that is mine and has my scent with her. I have to take it back occasionally to wear it during the day to keep it smelling like me, and then return it before bedtime.

These things have helped me greatly with daughter. Good luck! Message me if you need to!

Hi M., I have 3 kids 2,8,11, and one more on the way.I have been very careful about what they watch on t.v or the movies. My rule is dose it hurt them if they don't see a particular movie but it might if they see the wrong movie. I'd rather error on the side of caution. The movies will always be there for them to see and just because they are promoted for children dosn't mean they are the best for them. A side from maybe being scary I think you have to protect them from some of the harshness and bad attitude and behavior that is considered funny. I admit that sometimes I feel bad when my friends are taking their kids to see a movie that I am choosing to wait on , but I see the rewards already in that my kids have never once been afraid at night and they are able to enjoy more rich and wholesome programs or movies. They have good taste and a broad range of interest. My oldest is braver then me in that she can go out side at night to take care of our animals and I am to chicken myself to go alone.I take her with me. Of course this is directly related to the fact I've seen way to many scary movies in my younger day. my kids have never complained about missing movies and I think they apperciate that I have their best interest in mind. I often use a movie rating website for parents that lets you know about any thing that might be of concern before hand. This is whats worked for me and I hope it's helpful to you. I wouldn't change a thing, no regrets. Thats the way I like it. Blessings

Hi M.,
Have you sat down with your daughter and watched The Incredibles together? Try it and you will be able to figure out which part is scaring her and help her through it - help her to see the fun side of it.
My son (now 4) was terrified of the dragon in Shrek. At first I would fast-forward through it and then, together, we watched more and more of that scene in the castle, until he was no longer scared. He was very proud of himself for overcoming his fear. This is a way of turning a fearful, negative experience into a learning, growing, positive experience which your child will be proud of.
Hope that helps.
G.

I am a Christian so I strongly believe in prayer. I suggest saying a prayer with your daughter before bedtime. Prayer is just a communication between a person and God so you can even let your daughter pray in her own words just the way she speaks to you. I believe at that age it's very important to be careful what they watch even if it seems harmless to us as adults. To a child everything is real.