Custody - Boynton Beach,FL

Hi Leeah,

I'm sorry you're going through this. You can file a stipulation for custody (file a motion, write up the agreement, both of you sign it so a judge doesn't have to make a ruling) and file it with the court yourself.

That said, NO custody orders are permanent. If he "smartens up and realizes what it means to have custody" (I'm not sure what YOU think it means to have custody... there are two specific kinds of custody, legal and physical, and neither is the same as terminating the other parents' rights) he can always file a new motion to modify.

Many attorneys will give you a free consultation meeting. Might be worth talking to someone about what exactly the process will be. Most court houses have a self help center as well that will help you prepare the necessary forms (if you have a day to spend there waiting your turn).

Hope this helps,
T.

He may be like most immature men who lose the only thing that has ever mattered and is being self destructive. It is not healthy for you, for him, or for your daughter. If I were you, Make sure that you are the custodial parent and give him some sort of visitation schedule.

My suggestion would be:
Underschool age:
One mid-week visit (a few hours to over night)
And Every other friday from 5pm to Saturday 5pm.
Rotating holidays
School age:
Every other weekend from Friday at 5pm to sunday at 5pm
Rotating Holidays

If he chooses not to use it then it is his loss, but it is best to leave the door open for your daughters sake. Do not let him slip out of his parental rights. If he terminates his rights in FL you do not get any support from him. If I were you I would ask the court to evaluate his ability to parent, mental status, ect. and go from there. Please do not take his stupidity and your anger about his behavior and make rash decisions that will effect all of your lives for the next 17 years.

I am not a lawyer, but in my experience with divorce and custody, the only documents that are recognized by family court are those drawn up by a lawyer and approved by a judge. We used a mediator, but the documents from the mediator still needed to be rewritten by a lawyer in language that a court would accept. If you want legal/physical custody, you need to hire a lawyer.

Custody orders comes through the courts. Even if you could get something notarized it wouldn't necessarily be official until it went through the court. You don't need a lawyer to file the necessary documentation but understand when you file for custody they are also going to encourage you to to file for support. At the point that you enter a courtroom before a judge is the same point you will need a lawyer. You don't know what kind of bias the judge may have on that day and they do sometimes. So being prepared is better than not being prepared.

Daughters need their daddy too. I hope you can work out a mutually agreeable situation.

Hi Leeah,

Custody, Visitation/Parenting Time and Child Support are 3 different things and they are sort of independent of each other. Well Child support will usually have some basis of how often he will keep your daughter.

CUSTODY - just means that you have the decision making final authority.

But unless you sever parental rights he would still be able to have up to 50% visitation (if you all agree.... standard visitation is something like 25% time) and should be responsible for paying child support.

I wouldn't hire a laywer "willy nilly" but ABSOLUTELY you need a lawyer to draw up custody / visitation / child support agreement and file it in court. If he decides he wants her and comes to get her and you call the police.... they will laugh at you if you have a notorized letter. They will only enforce a judgement - which requires (hence the name) a judges ruling.

However - if it's uncontested this should not cost a lot. You guys can even use the same lawyer.

Good Luck

While I can fully understand why you'd want to get him out of the picture, epecially now that he's all focused only on himself, there will come a day when your little girl will need and want her daddy and if she's lucky your ex will realize he wants to be in his daughter's life.

For now while he's happy to not be involved in the child-rearing decisions go ahead and raise your child that way you want to. I'd keep a very accurate record of any visits, any child support, etc. Keep a notbebook and on a weekly basis record zero calls, visits or support - so that when court situations come up in the future you'll have a detailed record of his lack of involvement. What a jerk.

I hope for your duaghter's sake that he'll realize within the next couple /few years that he wants to be involved in his child's life. Girls need their daddy. But if he doesn't and you are blessed enough to meet a man who will want to be her daddy then beg, borrow or steal to get the ex-Mr. Wrong legally disconnected from parental rights and the future Mr. Right legally set up as her dad.

I realize that your heart must be breaking for so many reasons - but I truly believe God will find the best solution for you and your dear child if you follow Him.

God Bless Leeah.

I don't know about Florida, but when I was in Maryland and Virginia, you could find most documents on the court's website. Google your county courthouse. Hopefully there will be a link to the necessary forms you need. A notorized letter won't do. It needs to be filed with the court and ordered by a judge.

BTW: You can request that the records be sealed so no one can look up the case. However, you need cause to seal the records.

Be aware that just because he agrees to that today, it's not forever.
In PA, the court encourages you to try to work out a custody/visitation schedule yourselves.....
Is this really what you want for your daughter? To NOT see her father?
Try to think about the big picture.
Best of luck to you!

p.s. I hope he is paying child support.

You don't need a lawyer. I got divorced and had child support and custody and parenting time all set up thru the county. Just go to your county courthouse and ask them for the forms. they are only about $12. You fill them out yourself and follow the directions. You absolutely can do it yourself. Good luck.

If he agrees to you having full custody it does need to go through the courts to be "valid" - but, I want to point out .. Yes, he can at any time take you back to court to change custody BUT per FL law there has to be a "substantial change of circumstance" for custody to change. If he wants to change it "because he changed his mind" and you don't agree then that will not fly in court. A "substantial change of circumstance" means something like ... the custody/visitation schedule was made when he lived 500 miles away and now he lives 5 miles away so he can see her more....Or, if you are proven to be an unfit parent, something like that. I just went through this with my ex a couple of years ago and I am in Florida. I do recommend you speak with an attorney. You can find one that will give a free consultation.

Maybe what you are thinking of is something like him signing away his parental rights (then you would not get child support)? That is different than you having full custody. But, like others said, your little girl will need her daddy one day. Hopefully he will grow up and be a father.

seek an attorney for legal advise. Some lawyers are free for the first 45min to an hour. At least you can get a legal stand point before you make your next move.

get everything in writing...!!!!! and file it with the courts.

good luck!

you can go online to Florida's website and download all the paperwork necessary for the divorce and also the custody agreement. or go to a courthouse and see if they have the packets available to purchase. in volusia county they sell these packets in family law dept. at the courthouse. if you can't afford to file for divorce there will be indigency paperwork also that you can get and they will file to see if you have to pay or not. what i would suggest is that you file for full custody and that you have rights to say when and if he can see your child. that way if he wants to in the future or your daughter does, he can still come and see her but it will be when you say. also you can say (depending on the relationship and what he is doing) if it has to be supervised. good luck.

Check out this link:

http://www.flcourts.org/gen_public/family/forms_rules/905...

It took me all of 3 seconds to pull this up via google. I skimmed the beginning of it & it sounds like what you need. No lawyers needed.