Costume for a Mom. Appropriate of Not?

I would not want to be the object of negative attention at any party, much less my own son's birthday party. And as she described the costume, this will invariably be the case.

I think she could EASILY craft a catwoman costume that is far more appropriate. A black body suit and leotards or unitard (or sweat suit, even), with a tail, ears, and whiskers, in my opinion, would get the exact message across, and be far less obnoxious. I get that she may want a more 'professionally made' looking costume, especially if that's what the rest of the family will be wearing, but I would not do it at the expense of being the topic of all the jeering at the party. Wouldn't do that to myself or my son.

****EDIT****
I just have to add... just because you CAN doesn't mean you SHOULD. I often put things on from my closet that I'm busting out of... and I have to remind myself that just because I can get it on, doesn't mean I should wear it. Same goes for this costume. Just because she has a good body and CAN wear the costume, doesn't mean her son's birthday party is the right venue to sport it.

Maybe there is some way she can add something to the costume to make is Less "sexy"??

It's hard to say which way to go on this.
It's Halloween, I think it's fine, but then again some parents might be offended. I guess it all depends on WHO is going to her party. If she knows the parents well enough she should know if they will be offended or not.

4 year olds are NOT going to get the 'sexy' part of the costume. So the men may 'oogle' a little at the costume, big deal!

I wouldn't. Even if the kids don't know what they are looking at, their parents will wonder what you were thinking.
All you need for a Catwoman suit are a black leotard (look at dancing supply stores) but a black top or teeshirt will do, black tights or black pants, some cat ears (like on a headband) and use some makeup to draw a few whiskers on your face and maybe make the tip of your nose pink. Think more cat rather than Hollywood version of Cat-woman.
Additional: Yeah, Halloween costumes have really gone round the bend in the last few years. Not themed at all, but my idea for a great costume is a fuzzy over-sized bathrobe over flannel pajamas, fuzzy pink slippers, my hair in curlers in a hair net and a wonderful thick avocado facial mask all over my face. My husband would say "What costume? I see this every week.". Everyone else would think I was housewife of the walking dead.

Oh my goodness. I guess I am just flabbergasted. Is she for real? She wants every family to pick a theme and come dressed up? That is kind of bothering me from the start, as is the vision of a child "feeling" his mother's S&M like costume... I have been to grown up halloween parties, and if that were the case, you expect this kind of thing and that is so different. My husband and I were Almond Joy and Mounds once, draw your own conclusions about who was who. That was fun, and there were those kinds of sort of inappropriate suggestive costumes, and if she can pull that off, more power to her.

Let me tell you my experience. We have a child with an October birthday and have had family Halloween birthday parties before. One year, a freind called me and asked if she should wear a costume too. I told her that I was not planning on it, but if she wanted to, she could, but that the dress up party was for the kids, and I did not expect the adults to dress, but the adults were all invited to come enjoy the cook out, relax, have a beer, and watch the kids have fun. She too was a very nice looking woman. She came dressed in an I dream of Jeanie costume, with her belly and cleavage in more than full (and very nice-she was well endowed and very attractive) display and the sides of the parachute pants cut up to you know where. She looked very, very, hot, and extreemly out of place under the circumstances. Her arriaval completely changed the feel of the party. The husband's were speechless and uncomfortable, and the other wives started to gather in corners to talk, and I was furious that the fun family party we had planned became so uncomfortable for everyone, everyone, that is, except for the kids who had no idea what was going on and continued to play the games and have the fun we had planned for them. This woman's husband was unexplanably absent, which spoke volumes.

Your friend should really think about this. The children will think it is really cool and won't notice a thing that is going on. But the adults sure will, and most of them will not know where to look, what to say, and how to avoid talking about the elephant at the party.

She should consider putting together something that is more appropriate for a family event. A short sleved black tee with black bike shorts and the cat woman head dress and a cape would still say cat woman without saying "look at me and guess what I like to do in bed." Because, I can tell you from experience, that will be the topic of the little gatherings of Mom's in the all the corners...who knows, the men may be high fiving her husband, but for all the wrong reasons. She should just enjoy the party. or find something more appropriate to wear.

BTW, which one is her husband?

M.

It sounds like your son loves it. If she is comfortable in it, I say wear it. I'm sure I would be jealous if she looks so good in it, but as far as inappropriate, I have seen mermaid outfits and nurses outfits that I find more inappropriate and offensive.

Why would it offend parents, because they are out of shape and jealous? I don't mean to sound like a b*tch but people need to lighten up, its not like shes going to walk around with a boob out. We are not talking about a slutty little red riding hood costume with a non-existant skirt and thigh highs, it is catwoman and it covers her head to toe! Any bathing suit would be much more revealing than something that covers your whole body but is skin tight- if it was a pool party should she wear a tshirt over her bathing suit- no! If SHE feels uncomfortable then tell her to throw a pair of black shorts on over the suit, otherwise I say wear it and have fun!!

I wouldn't. I would feel self-conscious. plus, if it's temperature hot, she's going to die in it b/c a mom is already running around crazy at her child's party.

Do catwoman, but pick out a different all black outfit and do the makeup, wiskers, and cat ears on her own.

Oh and keep the costume and wear it to an adult party. I'm sure she looks fabulous in it.

I personally would if I was in shape enough to wear something like that. If it covers all the parts and doesn't show a lot of skin, then go for it. If the mom's complain then just explain that it was the only good costume and when you got it you didn't realize it was that skin tight. Try wearing like a boa or something to cover or something. .

I think I have a pretty good idea of what the costume would look like and because its Halloween I wouldn't be offended. But then there might be some parents that are...so I don't know.

If it doesn't show more skin than a bathing suit, or a gymnastics leotard then I don't see anything wrong with it. It's not the costume so much as how you behave in it. Cat woman wears a skin tight body suit with adornments to make her appear cat like. It's like taking a scuba wet-suit and then putting on fake cat nails and a mask. It's not inappropriate unless you start doing a poll dance in it.

Maybe she could add a black skirt and a black vest.

The fact that she is questioning it and so is her husband is enough of a reason to tone it down. Moms of other kids are going to be very offended, especially if they bring thier husbands or sons and catch them staring! She can still wear it, but make it more G than PG-13. She can put a black tshirt and shorts, or a black cardigan or sweatshirt on over it. Moms will appreciate the good taste shown.

Ok, first let me say that I LOVE Halloween. I will agree that the adult costumes are many time too revealing. As one poster said, it's an excuse to dress like a tramp and get away with it. That being said, there are plenty of costumes out there that aren't revealing. I say wear it, but with a skirt, like previously mentioned. The whole family is dressing in the batman theme, so it's an appropriate character. If she tried for any other female batman character, she's going to have the same problem. What is she supposed to do? NOT get to dress up? Put a skirt around her middle and maybe even a black t-shirt (depending on how uncomfortable she still feels). I once wore a witch costume to my son's classroom party. It had a short dress, cape, hat, etc. Because the dress was above the knee, I wore tights and bike shorts underneath. When I went to bend over to play a game, a dad was behind me and must have made a comment because his wife told me about it later. She laughed at it, but I was mortified. I took steps to make sure I was not inappropriate. Men can just be ...well..men and if there are dads at the party, she's going to get gawked at pretty much no matter what. Catwoman is....Halle Berry. But, that's not a reason to not have fun dressing up. Suggest she cover up a little and have fun!!!!!

If it looks like this one: http://www.buy.com/prod/adult-catwoman-costume/q/listingi... then I see nothing wrong with it however I have seen some other racier ones when I googled the costume that I think are inappropriate.

Honestly I would be the other parent at the party that would probably think teh whole family looked cool. Thats what catwoman wore, tight black leather. BUT if she isn't comfortable or really wants to consider an alternative here's this costume...
http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.nexternal....
Good Luck to Cat Woman. =)

If her breasts aren't hanging out of half of them exposed and lots of cut outs where they don't need to be then I don't know what the problem would be. If it's too warm to wear it then I certainly would not keep it and wear it, I would make something else and be comfortable.

Oh, golly, you can't tell what something you mail-order is going to look like in real life! When in doubt, don't wear it! If it makes you or your husband uncomfortable, don't wear it! Send the silly thing back. Is your friend handy with a needle (or are you) - could she make some sort of costume out of something close to that fabric? Maybe even just looking like a cat would be enough. It wouldn't quite "match" the theme, but it could come close enough to be a joke.

I don't see a problem with the costume, as long as it is not REVEALING. As described it is tight fitting but does it reveal anything? The whole family is doing this theme. Her son love's it.

She didn't say everyone had to dress up but the birthday child's family is!

If you go back through the comic book, the 1960's TV show and the movies (Halle Berry as Catwoman), it's supposed to be a tight-fitting costume to replicate the sleek lines of a cat.
Here's what images Google has listed for Catwoman:
http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&source=imghp&b...=

I wouldn't personally have an issue with it despite being very modest about my body post 2 kids.

However, it's a matter of your comfortability. If it's batman themed, you really don't have a lot of options for female characters other than Vicky Vale (see the Batman movie from the early 1990's with Michael Keaton and Kim Bassinger).

Good luck!

Wow - I'm really surprised by the answers. I guess I find it interesting that showing no skin, but being tight is considered offensive. I agree with the comparison that if this was a swimming part and she wore a normal 1 piece swimsuit, would that be "too sexy"?

I LOVE halloween and Love dressing up - and yes I agree that many female costumes starting with teens are way too sexy. However, I agree with the person who posted a link to the picture - I would not find that inappropriate. I think if you let your guests know that it is dress up, you could even call the parents in advance to personally share your family is doing a batman theme - I think it will help set expectations. Also, it's not like she will be carrying a whip or anything and in the context of the whole family dressing up, I think the problem is the indivdiuals who take it out of context and make it something it's not (e.g. S and M).

Updated

Wow - I'm really surprised by the answers. I guess I find it interesting that showing no skin, but being tight is considered offensive. I agree with the comparison that if this was a swimming part and she wore a normal 1 piece swimsuit, would that be "too sexy"?

I LOVE halloween and Love dressing up - and yes I agree that many female costumes starting with teens are way too sexy. However, I agree with the person who posted a link to the picture - I would not find that inappropriate. I think if you let your guests know that it is dress up, you could even call the parents in advance to personally share your family is doing a batman theme - I think it will help set expectations. Also, it's not like she will be carrying a whip or anything and in the context of the whole family dressing up, I think the problem is the indivdiuals who take it out of context and make it something it's not (e.g. S and M).

It's your party- you can flaunt if you want to!!!!

Seriously - have a blast! The four year olds will think you are the coolest mom, some moms might be jealous, and some dads might drool. Your only responsibility is to your family : )

Perhaps you could add some silly accessories to make the costume a bit more juvenile, and less S&M. Try Party City, and add some traditional cat costume stuff to it - just to tone it down a bit.

Have Fun!

I say wear it, holloween isnt just for kids :) If she is feeling a little self comncious in it maybe make or get a little black skirt to wear with it, but the catwomen costume covers everything (not like your gonna see butt cheeks or anything). I dress up every year and some adult costumes a re a little showy so I add tights or a tank top under them for a little extra coverage. But if she has got the body why not! Just because we are parents doesnt mean we sont get to enjoy looking good (and maybe a little sexy) at holloween. Plus it sounds like her daughter loves the whole concept and why should mom be left out. All batman women charaters have skin tight clothes.

Boy oh boy, I LOVE halloween!!

Catwoman is sexy. Period. There's no way to do ANY female batman character and not have it sexy. So if they're doing a batman theme and she doesn't want to be in drag, she needs to relax a bit. ALL the kids that know batman know what catwoman looks like. That said, there are a bunch of DIFFERENT catwoman costumes. There are ankle to wrist full body catsuits, and their are criss crossed leather midriff baring, cleavage overspilling va va va voom! costumes.

I'd suggest she and her husband go online and look google image "catwoman costume" to get a perspective on the "level" this particular costume is at.

As a parent I would have absolutely NO problem at all with the hostess being catwoman. I mean... a bikini catwoman, maybe would inspire some "Daaaang Girl, trade bodies with me, would you?" type of jealousy + "Are you nuts?" (it's always cold and wet in seattle on halloween... like 40 and raining). But it matches what her SON wants to be for halloween. Her only other choice is to come as a man. Ditto if her son wanted to be Neo from the matrix, I'd have no problem if she was Trinity... although I think it would be ODD if she chose to come as Morpheus, to each their own.

But IMHO if a parent is offended by a comic book character, there are other issues at play, and there is no way she can win.

Mmmmmm. BTW... if all the other parents are in costume, and SHE isn't, THEY will feel out of place.

It sounds to me like *she* is feeing uncomfortable wearing it. If she really feels awkward in it, despite being in great shape- then don't wear it. I wouldn't worry so much about what other moms say, but she won't have a good time if she is thinking about that, or worried about splitting a vinyl seam!!

Otherwise, just go 'soft-core' lol and get a black leotard and skirt from a dance store and a headband with kitty ears and make a tail. Moms and kids do it for Halloween all the time!

I would say to her to make her own a little less sexy costume - black leggings, black long sleeved or even short sleeved t-shirt, tunic, or turtleneck - both can be cotton blends, so much les hot than faux leather. Get some cat ears and a cat-eye mask - or even use the mask from the sexier outfit, and go for it....Maybe keep the sexy costume for some fun with hubby or for a grown ups halloween party on down the line!

I'd go with how my child felt about the costume. Since Eli loved it, go ahead and wear it. Maybe mention to the other parents that adults are invited to dress up if they'd like.

There might be a few adult comments, mostly jealous because she looks so good in the costume! The kids at that age will just enjoy that an adult is willing to really get into the action with them.

I've lived in neighborhoods where some parents dress up and some don't for Halloween and the costumes are a mix of svelte catwoman and everything else. Don't worry about it, have fun.

L. F., mom of a 14-year-old daughter

If you're uncomfortable, don't wear it. There are a lot of other female batman characters you can go as, Haraquin, Batwoman, Poisen Ivy, etc. Find one that you feel is appropriate

Is there any way to de-tramp-a-fy it? Maybe a black undershirt that hides cleavage? I wouldn't worry about it. A 4 year old is going to think cool!!!! Now then, if it was for a party of 14 year old's I wouldn't wear it.

One dressing rule I try to live by is, "If you have to ask, then don't" - meaning if you have to ask yourself if it's appropriate, then it's probably not. Whether or not you have a fabulous figure is beside the point. Your objective is to be considerate of others. Find some black clothes and add a tail. It won't be hard to figure out that you are "Cat Woman". As a woman who also works out and enjoys the benefits to my figure, I can tell you from experience that no other woman will appreciate seeing you in that cat suit. Your body may look sharp, but your character won't.

If in doubt, don't. Personally, it wouldn't bother me if I was a parent at the party, but if she feels uncomfortable or that people will talk about it later, then why put yourself through that. Why not put together another character costume from Batman together? It doesn't have to be a girl, it could be any villian.

absolutely wear it for a halloween party, and absolutely NOT for a 4 year old party.
why? well parents will get uncomfortable, both men and women. you don't want guests at your house feeling uncomfortable.
tell your friend to draw whiskers on her face and voila CATWOMAN :)

Yeah, I think it is probably over the top for a 4yo bday party. Maybe keep the mask/headpiece on and wear some regular black clothing. The world is full of judgemental people who love to gossip - she doesn't want to make herself the next "talk of the town"

I didn't read the other responses, but my opinion is this ... if you are questioning it, then the answer is probably no, you shouldn't wear it. :( Sounded fun, though!

I think there's a time and place for catwoman and a 4YO's Bday party is NOT the place. I am not stuffy nor prudish in the least ( I own my own catwoman suit that I've worn to adult halloween parties and look pretty good, if i say so myself), but I just don't think it's necessary to overshadow your 4YO's day by dressing in this manner. Why would you want to risk all the other parents talking about you and your costume instead of Eli and his day, the festivities, the games, the fun kid costumes, etc??

It's your son's party, not yours. Pick another, more appropriate costume for the party and save catwoman for you and your husband's "party" later on. ;)