Hey Mommies.....I would love to get some advice on how to transition my 15mth old son from co-sleeping to crib sleeping. I am ready to sleep alone with my hubby again, and to sleep without interruption through the night w/o having to move a foot off of my head or out of my back. As you can see I have a wild sleeper, which makes me desire to sleep alone again. I would love to minimize crying with this transition, but I will take all suggestions b/c I know he will be crying no matter what. He sleeps through the night with us, but I fear that he will not sleep through the night when this process begins. I am prepared to lose some sleep during this time, but am looking forward to the day when everyone is in their own bed, so losing sleep now is what I will do. Thanks....
Alysia....thanks. I know that it will be hard work, but I am up for the challenge b/c I am ready to sleep again. ;-) I've been thinking of transitioning his bed to the toddler bed b/c I think that he is afraid of the bars and the lack of option to not be able to get up on his own. I will definitely try to move him, especially if I can get my hubby to change his bed set-up. Your words were very helpful b/c I know what I need to do. I fell into the co-sleeping mode due to nursing. It was easier and I was able to get more sleep, but now it seems futile to keep him with us. I want for him to learn to sleep alone. His naps are alone in our bed b/c he wakes up about 30 mins into his naps in his bed. It drives me nuts, but I put him there b/c he will sleep about 2-3 hrs. That is nice for me to get some things done or to rest myself (on the couch)...LOL. I am hoping for the best and I will be consistent. I will just have to make sure my hubby is working with me and is just as consistent as me. I guess this is more common than realized...thanks to everyone for the feedback/questions....best of luck to everyone with their little ones sleeping on their own.
I am loving the responses....great feedback....keep it coming everyone! It is greatly appreciated....
Snuggle spot...It is a baby bed/pillow that makes a baby feel like it is being held when you cant hold it. www.laneybug.net
Yikes, we must ALL be in the same boat! LOL. Now that I had my second son, my husband and two year old share my son's double bunk beds, and I share our room with my infant. Not a great situation. My only thought is that when my youngest turns one the boys can share the bottom bunk in their own room! I truly thought I wouldn't make the co-sleeping mistake again, but it's nearly impossible! I guess I'm just a sucker. We need some "tough love" mommy advice on here! I can't wait...
Guilty....of the cosleeping. It was not about getting or not getting sleep for me, it got too much for my husband and so we had to shut it down. I just decided one day today is the day and I think my son was 4 and we explained this is your bed he did well. My daughter about the same age not so well. I came up with a reward. The reward was if you sleep in your bed the whole night then in the morning when you wake up you can come into my bed, I would stay in my PJs so they still had the comforting experience I would remind them of this when they started to tear up or when they didn't want to stay in their beds. In the morning you can come in my bed. It really worked for my daughter.... we could snuggle which is what she wanted. There was the consistancy thing cuz once you decide you can't go back it messes everything up...even when they are sick cuz that is when I got weak. I would want them close when they were ill and then I just undid things. My sister used the bed on the floor method and that worked really well for her.
I will say I loved cosleeping w/ my kids and if I had to do it again I would do it the same way. I look back and getting them into their own beds wasn't really that hard.
T.; hey totally understand, we have always kept an open room policy but when door is closed you better knock first, but we knew that kids would come into the room, especially if they can walk and get up and come in there they will, and they get scared at times, and its ok to give them the comfort they need, but it can disturb sleep , so my husband and i put a little mattress under our bed, usually on my side, and i would hold them if need be, and then lay them on the mattress, it worked well, the kid came to me, got comfort and then laid them down on the floor, with their own sheets and blankets, i got sleep, they slept, they got comfort, if they stirred and about to wake up i was right there to pat their little backs and it was a smooth transition to their own bed, hope it works , have a good sleep, D. s
Actualy T. I am not responding but inquiring as well. I have a three year old daughter who still insists on sleeping with us, as well as a 16 month old son. I am constantly moving a foot out of my side, stopping my hair from being pulled, etc. My daughter has her own room with her own bed, but WILL NOT sleep in there. I have the kids for most of the week by myself, so them sleeping with me is usually not a problem, but for the nights my hubby is home, the bed is just way to small! I need help to get my bed back before I end up divorced!!!!
I have the same situation when you figure it out let meknow. She sometimes sleeps all night in her bed but most of the tim ein outr and I just recently got her to start on the floor but that was one night so who knows if it will happen to night. I am the only one who gets kicked daddy gets to sleep peacefully so completely understand where your comming from. Let meknow what you discover.
T.,
It might help to put the crib in your bedroom by your side of the bed. (If you have the room) Put your son in the crib while you work in your room during the day, such as folding laundry, making the bed, etc. The time he spends playing quietly in the crib will help him to be accustomed to the new surrounding so they don't feel scary at night.
During nap time (if he naps), put him in the crib with a couple of books and soft toys so he can learn how to fall asleep on his own. Even if he doesn't nap it is a good idea to put him in the crib for at least 30-60 minutes with a few books and soft toys to play quietly with. Everyone needs a bit of alone time to process the day's events, especially little ones.
Then, at night put the crib close to your side of the bed, add one of his favorite soft toys, and a sweatshirt or t-shirt that is yours. Something that has your smell on it so when he wakes up he can find your scent. It may or may not help to sooth him back to sleep. Put him in the crib while he is still fully awake. A story, song, and some cuddle time is fine, but don't fall into the trap of rocking him to sleep and then putting him in the crib.
If he wakes up and starts to cry in the evening or during the night you should touch him, rub his back, talk softly to him and when he settles go back to bed. Don't pick him up unless he is really screaming. Picking him up may just wake him up further and it will be harder for him to fall back asleep on his own without your help.
As the week or weeks progress slowly move the crib father away from your bed and finally transition it into his own room (if you have one prepared for him).
The first few nights are critical. He needs to learn that you are still there and love him, but he needs to learn how to sooth himself back to sleep. If you hear him moving around in the crib during the night and he's not crying don't play with him or talk to him or even make eye contact, because it will become a game and then you will have a new habit to break.
Good luck getting your bed back. Stay consistent with the new routine and everyone will adjust just fine. It takes time, but it is worth it in the end.
-C..
Is it possible to start with a bed in your room and slowly work your way up to him sleeping in his own room?
Hi ladies,
It is a tough situation to be in and the transition is NOT going to be easy. You have to decide which is more important to you (having your bed back or not hear crying) and BE CONSISTENT. My first daughter is my best sleeper and I am now convinced it is because we were the most strict with her about bedtime and staying in her own bed. My second would end up in bed with us quite a few nights a week (because I allowed it) and I finally made a bed on the floor for her with a couple blankets. I did not make it too comfortable because my goal was to make her realize her bed was the better option. We always put her in her own bed at bedtime. when she got up in the night, she could choose her bed or our floor. Our bed was NOT an option. She slept on our floor for a few nights, but realized quickly that her bed wasn't so bad. Our third is the one who doesn't like to go to bed at night. She constantly gets out and we constantly put her back in. She is starting to realize that she needs to stay in her bed when it is bedtime. Once she's asleep, she generally stays there til morning. As you can see, every child is a little different and sleep issues are always hard. The only advice I can give is to stay consistent, even when you are so tired you don't realize they are in bed with you until they are asleep again. :)
T., just a suggestion. Going from sleeping in your bed to a crib might be worse than going to a toddler/twin bed with a rail (unless he already naps in his crib). He is used to no bars and it might scare him. You will also go through one less transition if you go straight to the bed thus avoiding another time of sleeplessness.
I hope all of you are soon able to get a full night's rest!
