Changing Habits for a Toddler?

Hi,
My 3 yrold son is doing the same thing. Not eating... because he's rather be playing. I let him eat whatever and whenever he wants - so that I know he's eating something. Usually it's friut and/or store-bought cereal. His stools are really soft too - I assume that it's because he's eating so much friut. From what I've heard, its all pretty normal.
If you are worried about the bug bites, I'd take her to a doctor just for peace of mind.

J., I would call the doctor and have her checked out because if she was bit by a mosquito and found a spider it migth be something going on internal. I would definitely have her checked out to have a piece of mind.

My son is 2.5yo and was a great eater till about 19 months. Stopped eating full meals. He is in the 98% tile for his weight and height. Dr said to let him eat when he wants or it will become a power struggle as it is common with this age trying to get independence. They want to be in charge so the more you force it the more they resist. So if she isn't under weight and is happy and healthy let her be. It is so frustrating I know as I make a meal and he looks at it and gets up from the table. As my dr also said, you give them the meal and if they don't like it that is it. You tell them no more food till the next meal and do not become a short order cook which is another power play with them. There are some days my son just wants to eat a bowl of cheerios for dinner....so be it. As long as your giving them healthy foods they will be fine. They will eat when they are hungry. I just get so upset when i toss my son's food all the time. One thing I have notice with my son is he will eat the things if we make them together. I don't let him snack through out the day or let him fill up on milk. they go through phases and this too shall pass. Good luck!

SAHM, 39 2.5yo super active son and 2 month old son that doesn't want to sleep. Very tired but love being a full time mommy. My husband of 4 years travels every week for work so I feel like a single mom a lot. Looking forward to when the boys are buddies and can entertain each other.

Hi J.,
I have to say this sounds pretty normal for toddler behaviour. Their appetites go up and down with growth spurts. They may not want much of anything to eat at all for weeks, then suddenly they're voracious for a month. The symptoms to look for are things like a distended belly, blood in her poop, fevers, lethargy, vomiting, and complaints of abdominal pain. Is she drinking fluids? And just how much fruit and what kinds of fruit is she eating daily? That could be the source of the diarrhea if fruit and fluid is all she's taking in. Bananas are great for slowing diarrhea down, but juices cause increase in diarrhea because of the fruit and sugar content. Also, having diarrhea for a few weeks is not uncommon in children. It may indicate a bit of a gastrointestinal virus, which just has to work itself out on its own. Just watch for signs of dehydration, which are things like lethargy, sunken eyes, decreased or dark, smelly urine, dry mouth and no tears when crying. And just one more thing I'd like to say. Try not to make a big deal of how much or how little she eats or try to force her to eat. That just causes eating issues down the road. But the bottom line is, if you are worried about it, by all means make an appointment for her ped. And even if they say everything's fine, you've done your job as a mother! Take care!

Hello. I wouldn't worry so much about her not eating. Kids seem to go through changes with food a lot. My two year old was the best at eating everything and than one day decided that she did not want to eat her meals. Her doctor said that kids know how much to eat a day and that they will never go hungry. Now I just put her meal on he table and let her eat what she wants out of it and not let it bother me so much. About the fruit, it will make her have lots of runny diapers but at least she's eating healthy fruit instead of cookies or junk food. Maybe try to give her a banana and apple sauce every day to make her bowel movements thicker. I hope this helps. I know how frustrating it could be to see your child go from eating everything to not eating.

Please call your pediatrician and, if necessary, get a referal to a pediatric GI. I have no idea how the bug bites might factor in, but my son had pretty bad stomach problems, even at your daughter's age. Strangely, constipation can cause runny poops because only the most liquidy stuff can get around whatever is plugging up the system.  Also, you generally don't feel terribly hungry when constipated or having other stomach pain. Does her tummy feel hard and/or is it distended?  Both are signs of tummy issues. The infant gas relief stuff is pretty worthless for real digestive issues, and there are lots of causes of stomach distress.  Please, please take her to the doctor.  There is no way anyone can diagnose what is going via the internet, and most of us are not doctors.  Stomach issues can be challenging to treat, even for good general med docs (I have gone through them not only with my son but also with myself).  For laypeople -- no way.  Personally, I went through a couple of years in my mid-twenties where I would feel ravenously hungry, eat only a little bit, and then feel so bloated and full that I thought I might throw up.  That was actually silent reflux, apparently, though I'm sure my having IBS contributed as well.  I never had a fever; there wasn't an infection.  It was incredibly uncomfortable and did not resolve on it's own.  Meds helped as did acupuncture.  In fact, when I first did acupuncture, I went to get help for my arm before going to grad school. The Chinese medicine doc refused to treat one area, saying that he treated the whole system one chakra at a time.  I figured it couldn't hurt. The pins never hurt until this one he put in my lower leg. I let out a screach, and her looked at me quizzically and asked if I had stomach problems.  I said yes, and he explained something about the meridian this point was on relating to digestion.  Perhaps acupressure (pressing with fingers instead of inserting pins) would have a similar outcome. Anyway, I have not had the ravenous to full and nauseous in just a few bites thing happen since that time. I had not told the acupunturist about my stomach problems.  Also, this happened 11 years ago. I once asked a friend who is a psychologist at UCSF if this could just be a placebo effect type thing, but she said that placebo effects don't last nearly this long (I stopped the acupuncture years ago).  Just something to consider.  No matter what, please get your daughter in her doctor as soon as possible.  Please don't let people tell you she is looking for attention or playing you. She is too young for that. Sure, if she is getting lots of attention suddenly, she will continue a behavior, but she woukd not have come up with the idea to feign tummy problems, and kids eat when they are hungry. She wouldn't let herself feel horribly hungry for days just for attention.
K.

Hi J.,
it is true that often children go through periods when they just don't eat much and others when they are insatiable. I agree with the philosophy that says our (parents) job is to offer a variety of healthy foods and their job is to choose what and when to eat. Of course that doesn't mean we cater to their every whim. We choose the foods that are available and can set some limits on when it is available.

Many children at this age are also natural grazers and can eat a lot more then we think. This is considered a quite healthy method of eating for all of us. Unfortunately with our society and fixed meal breaks (school and work) we mostly learn to adapt to a different rhythm. She has a few years yet before she needs to face that though.

The runny stools may be related to what she is eating or they may be a symptom of the cause. I would suggest a quick trip to her primary physician to check that she is not impacted (constipated to a level that only the liquid or very soft stool can mover around) or that no other medical issues are present. That way you can either stop stressing or deal with a real issue instead of guessing and worrying.

I hope this works out for you.
K.

Hang in there! It sounds like you've hit the "hunger-strike stage".. We are in the midst of this with my son. He will eat fruit and drink milk - which of course leads to the non-solid BMs. What can you do?!? :-)
My pedi suggested that we keep a food diary of what he WAS eating, and note any trends or specific times he ate. We noticed that he was really snacking alot in the late afternoon, and we tried changing his dinner time earlier - this was a big help. He still will refuse what we have for dinner some nights, but I always make sure that I offer a good balance of food and I try to include him in the meal prep - that was a big help as well, he couldnt wait to boast to daddy that he "made" dinner :-) We also tried, at the pedis suggestion, a switch to lactose free milk to see if mybe the large quantity of milk he was drinking could be contributing to the diarhhea... It made some improvement, but I might still ask about the referral to the internist to check things out more, as suggested in your other response.
At this age they are still going to be able to eat what they need - as long as you let them. I read that you can't force them to eat, or make a big production of what they are or are not eating as that will only lead to possible food issues later (as well as BIG headaches now with the whole power struggle)
We try to keep the dinner time and snack times consistant - no grazing; and we make sure he knows that what we have is what we're having, no special meals just for him. He can eat part or all, or none - but thats whats for dinner. When he says hes all done, and hes excused from the table, he knows that he is Done and he wont be asked back to finish or get something else. Lastly, involving him in the preparation or planning of the meal really did seem to foster more actual eating. My hubby says boys arent supposed to be in the kitchen - but I counter with a list of Great and Famous Chefs -- all men! LOL Plus, I love the quality time with my son, and watching his skills develop.

For you -- Check with the pedi and see what they say, the diarhhea is a symptom that should be checked out, even if it is only "too much fruit" there could be other issues that you can square away with a consult. Better safe than sorry, and you do pay for health insurance - get your moneys worth!

Wishing you a hungry, healthy and happy toddler :-)

Dear J.,
I have a 22 year old daughter and a 13 year old son. Believe me....kids go through phases where they do not eat as much as usual. They're not hungry, they're full, nothing really sounds good. If it's really hot where you are, that could be making a difference too. But it sounds like the age. And it won't be the first time she does this. Just don't make the mistake of offering her absolutely anything to get her to eat because it will make you feel better. I know too many kids who will eat nothing but Jell-O, hot dogs or chicken nuggets. Period. Every single day. No matter where they go. A kid will eventually eat something different if there is no Jell-O, hot dogs or chicken nuggets in the house.
Offer her cottage cheese and fruit, yogurt, veggies, use a cookie cutter to make a cute shape out of a cheese sandwich for her lunch.
Make sure you always offer a variety of healthy things. She will get her appetite back. And when she gets a little older and goes through this, you can let her help make things with you. It's totally normal to go through what I call the "Not Hungry's".

It's probably nothing, but I would take her to see her doctor. Just have a list of anything you are worried about.

She may just be going through a spurt where she's not really growing right now and so her apetite has decreased. My granddaughter's apetite ebbs and flows like the tide. Some days she's like a bottomless pit and other days she doesn't eat much at all. Keep your eye on her and make sure she's not losing weight, but I bet her apetite comes back soon enough.

Hi J., you might ask your Dr about this but when my two youngest hit the same age (in fact my youngest is 2 1/2 as well) they went through what my dr termed a physiological anorexia. Sounds worse than it is really! Basically kids don't do a whole lot of growing between 2-3 so their bodies don't need as much food -just enough to sustain their daily energy. Their bodies are really good at telling them when they are full so that may be why your daughter is saying she is full before she normally would. My dr's advice was to continue the normal schedule of meals and snacks but if she isn't hungry don't force the issue. She'll tell you when she needs food!

As a side note, when I went through this with my now 5 yyear old, I was at the DR once a month for awhile. Family members where questioning her lack of appetite and I wans't feeling very confident because of their doubts of the Dr's diagnosis. When I took my son in for his 2 year appt, a print out of Physiological anorexia was included with the other papers about discipline and poty training!

Talk to your Dr about it.. I wouldn;t think that the mosquito bite would have any affect on her appetite. If it was going to affect her, she would have signs near the bite of an allergic reaction..

Good luck !

C.

From personal experience, I would go online and read about gluten intolerance and celiac. Search those words along with the word "symptoms" and you might see other problems she has on the lists. Check several websites as there are MANY symptoms and you don't need to have them all to have the problem. It can be cured by eliminating wheat, barley and rye from the diet. She could also have some other food allergy/intolerance as well.

A feeling of fullness, gas and diarrhea are symptoms of celiac disease or gluten intolerance which are not as uncommon as doctors think! It is genetic so if other members of the family have had symptoms, it is worth looking into.

Hopefully, your daughter is just going through a phase. Mine wasn't and neither was I when I was her age. I really wish our doctors would have known about this condition because is causes lots of other problems later if not addressed...Skin rashes, sometimes constipation, malapsorption of nutrients such as iron (causing anemia)or B12 (B12 anemia, canker sores, thyroid problems, IBS and auto-immune disorders later in life.

Do your research! It is worth the time! :)

Your daughter may be gowing through a growth spurt. i know when my daughter was about the smae age she did not eat very much for about 2-3 weeks during her growth spurt so i am sure it is nothing to worry about.

2 to 3 yr. olds eat what and when they want. It is about the only power they know they have. Also, they are quite in tune with their bodies; after all it is still all about them. If she has a stomach bug or problems from eating so much fruit, she knows that food makes her tummy hurt. If she is like most children, she'll avoid anything that causes pain.

If worried, take her in to the dr. for a quick look. Monitor the runny poops...how long is this going on, how often, how often after she eats/drinks, etc.

Good luck,
Stephanie