Birthdays: What's Normal These Days???

A.,

I think you have the right idea on celebrating your child's birthday rather than trying to keep up with the Jones'. My husband and I just started talking about our daughter's first birthday celebration and decided to only include family and one friend. I think a lot of times these neighbors or school friends throw these extravagant events due to the parents' insecurities or the need to be perceived as being better off than others. Just my opinion. I grew up as a Jones and thankfully my parents kept my twin brother's and my expectations realistic about birthday celebrations. Keep it simple and intimate. It makes it that much more fun to look back on past pictures and be able to identify all of the guests. If you want to spend more on his gift, then that is where you should splurge! Good luck and stand strong.

Hello A.,

wait...wait... you didn't say anything about the goody bags! it's completely out of control. My kids' parties go 'out of control' on my opinion because they want to include all their friends so we end up with 15-20 kids. other than that...I try to keep it simple. a swimming party, a couple of parties at the lewisville recreation center and one at peter piper pizza) and except for my son's 1st birthday (I didn't know any better) I now give 1 item... uno cards, pokemon cards, etc... from the $dollar$ store. I do try and find something the kids will actually play with but that's about it. I have a friend that DOES NOT give goody bags. Someday I hope to do that too. Oh, I bake the cake and have the kids help me decorate it. You're OK. keep it simple. and have fun! ~C.~

We just have a little get together at our house. I spend like 40 bucks on birthday supplies with a matching theme at birthdayexpress.com and get a cake which is usually around 30/40 depending on how many people we have over. I'll also provide snacks or something or sometimes people will bring over a dish to share.

It's a really inexpensive way to do a birthday party and the kids always have a lot of fun.

I always save stuff like chuckie cheese/bounce house places for stuff to do during playdates and such because it's cheaper.

I don't think going all out is necessary for children. It puts a bigger dent in your piggy bank and using money that could be going towards their college or something more important. Plus, they are going to have fun no matter what.

for our daughters first b-day we did a HUGE family/friends (over 100 people easy) party at my husbands aunt and uncles who have a "party barn" and land. it's tradition in their family so i let it go even though she won't remember and it was more for my in-laws. this year and last year (she just turned 4 today!) we have had simple parties in the backyard. 30-40 people, pizza, popcorn, cake etc. we did buy a small bounce house off craigslist for $100 last year for the party but we use it practically year round. We also have a slide/fort thing we bought from our neighbors a couple of years ago before she could really use it and have a pretty big sandbox that my husband made himself with pavers and sand obviously. But besides those things that's all we do and that's our normal backyard activities when friends come over. I know people who go crazy also and to be honest I don't think the kids care either way. The kids had so much fun last year doing "simple" things the party went on for over 4 hours and they were just playing. So to answer your question I think you're the normal one.

small is normal for us! the biggest we have ever had was chuck e cheese with family and cub scout friends. other than that, it's family and close friends only out for a nice dinner and cake. the kids love that they are in the spotlight and have decorations. on the flip side, my 4 yr old is getting invited to huge bashes (Jump places with pizza , Little Gym, and the like) for his classmates and i'm thinking McDonalds is as big as i'd ever would want to go for him. So when one of them did a backyard home party, us "simple" people told the parents how much we loved it. the kids had more fun there i think than at the fancy places! keep it simple, keep it real!

I think you're the normal one and that your neighbors are going a bit overboard - the party they're doing is for them and others and not for their kids. Toddlers don't need big birthday parties - once they start school, the parties at chuckee cheese or whatever can be fun for school friends. Or, if someone wants to do one at their home, then a bounce house is certainly okay - but again not for a two year old IMHO. This is just a symbol of our culture that folks think their kids should have everything from day one, whereas most kids this age just need day to day one on one attention from their parents. It is very unfortunate IMHO that so few people understand age appropriate activities for kids. So, I personally agree with you 100% and over time, you will teach your kids a very valuable lesson by showing them that happiness isn't found in spending alot of money.

As kids get older, certainly, their world expands to have more friends, but the folks at the kids parties should be the child's choice and not the parents IMHO. This year I offered to have a party for my 13 year old at Main Event but my son chose to have 3 friends to our house for a sleepover - burgers for dinner and cupcakes and popcorn (with root beer) for a snack - to him that was a good party. We also had a family birthday party with a cake the next night (on his real birthday).

excellent choice A.. I think it is time we all think of simple with good friends and family. We never went crazy with parties and my kiddos survived! Guarantee it will be remembered with smiles then with what did we do on his second birthday...who came did we thank them for coming all the stress that comes with craziness!

Pick a great pumpkin and Happy Birthday!