Being an Advocate for You School Age Child

I wrote a letter about my child entering Kinder this year to explain the type of teacher she would do the best with. She is a quick learner (not GT necessarily) but works quick, learns quick, and not one to wait for the next thing. I simply requested a seasoned teacher who may have reduced wait times and more efficiency in the classroom. She is also a tough cookie with a super tender-spirit (specially with movies/shows) so I wanted them to know this since I noticed my other child would tell me at home they watched a movie and this won't fly with this one.....we almost had to leave Winnie the Pooh the other day....so this can be an issue. The kinder lead teacher has made contact with me and has taken all I shared into consideration in placing her.....that is one thing I am glad I have done to advocate for her.

I agree with a PP about the PTA being mostly for the parent's gain--sorry but it's just not the rainbows and unicorns I had imagined.

I also don't see what your doing as "advocacy" per se--it's pretty much what most of the moms I know do.

I keep in touch with my child's teacher, make sure to stay on top of project due dates, reading requirements, etc.

I also volunteer in the classroom to read, help with activities when the teacher needs a hand and class party planning.

The thing is--you need to give your child roots and wings--and this is the wing part. They DO (even in K) need to learn what is their responsibility, to express the need for help, and generally learn the rules of the road and how school "works" warts and all.

I asked the teachers of my kids if they needed help and how I could help. The older they got the less the teachers wanted my help.

When they got into high school, the band teacher was happy to see me. I did all kinds of things to help her. I was a chaperone on trips, fund raising car washes, sales and marching band performances. I helped carry equipment on and off the field for band competitions and help the kids (my kids too) earn money for trips. Unfortunately I worked full time and could only go sometimes when I had a vacation time available.

Ask the teachers. Some will want your help. Some will not.

Good luck to you and yours.

Volunteer in her classroom. Take a friday in Oct/Nov to volunteer during the fall festival, or whatever. Teachers love help. Plus it gives you a wonderful perspective of how the school runs. I volunteered when I only had 1 other child at home once a week and loved it. I was grading papers which gave me a great idea how my daughter was doing comparitively. I was able to see the discipling that happened in the classroom and quickly respected it.

To be honest, I found the PTA to be a significant waste of time, since most of the parents are leagacies, who use the positin for their own personal gain, and tend NOT to there for the best interest of all the children, within the school... I did attend meetings to learn the lastest issues, and when to board mettings, however, the borad meetings tend to address issues that affect ALL taxpayers, and the low count of your nieghbors participation, when certain issues are being voted on, makes the local taxes, and students needs be approved or denied, because MOST PARENTS FAIL TO ATTEND THE BOARD MEETINGS, and a few members make decisions that affect ALL STUDENTS! For me, as I becag entering the school system with my daughter, I found that the best level of support, came in the actual school she attended... I went to the teachr, and asked her, "how could we support each other in providing not only my child, but, the other children in her class, the best education, while meeting her educational requirements, and while lessening the burden that the financial changes from the school boards and state, so my child and the other students were afforded the best?" Every year, I said the same statement, and every year, I kept my "promise," even, while on active duty... If I could not show, I sent a "pre-approved relief parent." I had a school supply drive from my family and friends, for this is a major issue for teachers... I collected so much, additional classes in her grade, got some of the wealth, too! I went to the principal, and asked, how could I support the school and the staff? I was assigned to "parental paperwork," where I copied, stapled, cut, pasted, draw, designed,coordinated, and supervised the activities that the teachers needed done, but, needed the time in the classroom, where the kids were; I became a student aide through the district (on-call) to assist special needs children who needed help; I becaame a playground supervisor, where game managemnt, sports basic skills, and how to teach good sportsmanship was my speciality; i was assigned to parent chaperone list for class trips for her grade/class; I was the fundraising parent for the book sales, bake sales, candy sales, and other fundraisers to fatten the schools special activity accounts... We were a uniformed school, we had a uniform schloraship for those families with need; we had a food drive for the less fortunate; through this fund we were able to hire the visiting zoos and other educational visits... We helped in enlisting local companies to fund computers, mentoring, class trips, sports teams, etc... We even had Olympic athletes visit, since our name was Olympics based, they gave a basic sports skills camp. And I participated in getting special needs mentors involved with the numerous special needs children, you need to see/hear successful adults to emulate... And i treated every child, as my own, and looked out for the welfare of all the children, since they were going to be an intregal part of my child's next twelve years in school, so fostering good citzenship, manners, communication, etc, was my simple goal, to make my own child successful. Because there are many parents who do not have the means to stay home or be available, but, with our school including everyone, and reaching out, we found out through sending out flyers asking "how could you support the school?" a one year committemnt, we found that many parents wanted to help, but, work, siblings, and lack of knowledge or language barriers, kept them away... We started an Adult English as a second language tutoring class, Adult lieracy (kids need parents who read and speak English to succeed, too), and found these parents had ALOT to offer! Our kids succeeded, because the proficiencies went up, and the community flourished, it just took committment... I even tutuored in advocating for special needs children and parents... however, I must mention that I did "shop," for the best teachers, since my child's future would be based on what the teacher brought to the table, as well... so, i inspected their credentials, especially in latest technology, training, community involvement, state test scores, student failures, tolerance, past issues, reprimands, and commuication skills... Yes, it did make sense, and I have worked to have some teachers removed, as well. I do not believe in teacher's tenure, protect them, especialy when students need knowledgable, female gender and ethnicity mentoring, and techological aware mentors... Time are a changing... What schools need to consider is that they really need to INCLUDE MORE PARENTS to offset the decreased funds, teacher's aides, and instructors. after navigating the school grades, and numerous teachers, I found that the support for the teachers, afforded us, especially my daughter, the added skills and time she needed to become successful, not only as a student, a professional employee, but, as a parent herself, at age 23! Good luck!

P.S. School boards and PTA meetings are easy to enter, walk-in, sit down, listen, and eventually where appropriate, introduce yourself, and ask questions, and enroll yourself on the email and volunteer list to learn the ways of the land and its people...

I'm a full-time working mom with a crazy schedule (sometimes work all night due to unexpected work emergencies, other days have more time on my hands), so it's hard to commit to PTA meetings and the like. However, especially with public schools, you really have to be on top of things with your child's school. My kids' school has over 950 students (K-6) on a year-round track system, so this school is absolute chaos all the time. It would be very easy for a child to fall through the cracks. I make sure I read every e-mail the teachers send, and that I reply on time as necessary. Also, I will e-mail the teachers with any questions I may have that are non-urgent ("I noticed on Isabelle's last math test that she seems to have trouble paying attention to whether to add or subtract. What do you recommend I do to help her work through this?" - and then the teacher can respond at her convenience, once she's had a chance to think it over. I find this more effective than the end-of-the-day-pickup ambush. ;).

I volunteer for field trips, art class docent, and any other events as often as my schedule allows. I find that being in front of the teachers all the time gets them to pay attention to my kids more. I should add that the teachers are all fantastic and hard-working people, but they are also way overworked, with 30+ kids per class, some of whom are gifted/talented, and some who have learning disabilities and should be in special ed (which has been discontinued in our district)... I can't imagine what it must be like to have to teach a class full of kids with IQs ranging from 70-150. And it's an unfortunate fact that children who have supportive families, who are polite, and who are above average academically, tend to be ignored in large public schools. The system as it stands now incentivizes the development of the below-average student (no child left behind, etc), but above average children who aren't behavior problems are pretty much ignored. As a parent you have to change this by continually advocating for your child and asking for additional enrichment activities, as well as creating those activities yourself.

I think the big thing is knowing when to advocate for your child. Remember you are preparing them for life, not for fun time. There will be less than pleasant staff at times. There are kids that are just brats at times. Heck it might even be yours on occasion. My best advice is not to take teacher time away from them doing their job. Go through the proper channels. Pick your battles. Work with and support the teachers and staff, instead of against. Trust your instincts, but also trust theirs. Advocate for the classroom, not just your child. I found looking at my time, I faired much better by letting them do their jobs and supporting them. I did have to advocate for my son a few times, but found very quickly is to go in with a open mind. I learned alot.

I was very involved in PTA, but tried not to make it about me. I tried to stay out of the drama, and discourgage it. I did things that I enjoyed. I gave my child space when I was up at school. But really being respectful to the staff and their time was probably the biggest help of all. They were able to use my time, and get back into the classroom. I involved myself in the mentoring program at the school. It was not my child I worked hardest for, it was someone elses. I found that alone, made a difference in the class.

It's a very long and exhausting battle. Both my girls are in high school.

The best advise I can give is to know and work with your child's teacher. Some teachers like having the parents in the room volunteering, others find it a big distration. Meet with the teacher other than just parent teacher conferences. If you see your child struggling with a certain subject or concept, contact the teacher and ask for advise on how you can help your child. One of the best compliments a teacher gave me "If half the parents just did half of the things you do with your child, I would have the easiest job in the world".

I'm not a big fan of the PTA, but yes you should join and attend the meetings. It helps you know what's going on in the school. You should also attend as many school activites as possilbe, back to school night, family fun night, health fair, etc.

I never attended a BOE meeting, but they were broadcast on public access, so I would listen to them every once in awhile. I also attended the debates for the elections of the BOE members, which I found to be very interesting and informative.

Good luck.

Well I am happy with my kids' school.
But, I per my child, also will speak up, when something needs speaking up, about.
BUT... I also know that, this is life. I cannot control everything when they are in school. The school has its procedures and rules and curriculum etc. Of which is fine.
Then there are things like school friends/bullying/food/activities, which takes, teaching your child about so that they learn and attain, a sense of "mastery" over these things. Personal matters. Like how to choose friends, how to say 'stop it' to bossy kids, HOW to speak up and TELL the Teacher when something is wrong or when they need help, how to speak up to an adult if they have a question etc.

And the other part is: a child needs to learn about life in their own way too. So you communicate with your child, teach them about emotions and that they CAN tell you anything they think or are concerned about or anything they are unsure about.

Each school, has its own way it is run.
Afterschool care... some schools often have a program in place, on campus. For which the parents pay.

I did the same as you and volunteered extensively at the schools from K through junior high. I'll do the same for the little guy as well.

I was a room mother for many years, PTA president at one school a couple of years, secretary at another, oversaw fund-raising, and it was an eye-opening experience. As a parent you wonder why certain things are as they are, and I found out, which made me a lot more understanding of the schools and their policies and turned into my being a liaison between parents and the schools.

And you're right, you have to be an advocate for your child ; )

Many teachers will allow you to volunteer, they need parents who can come in and read one on one or to the entire class, they need help with chaperones for trips, most teachers appreciate parents who volunteer. I have assembled packets and other assorted tasks to save the teacher time. Going to meetings and being a member of the PTA really helps you have an inside track on what is going on within the school.

We're fortunate to have a great school with great teachers and a huge amount of parent volunteer efforts and IME there are so many different ways to help out in your child's school, chances are good that you'll find something that fits your skills/interests. I'm an introvert and the thought of being in a PTA or school board meeting scares me, so instead I do things like shelving books in the library, helping out in the classroom (either with the students or helping the teachers with filing memos and class work in the students' take-home folders), contributing food to the "hospitality" lunches, working in the lunchroom, etc.

If the teacher will allow it, volunteer in the classroom. You see how she interacts with the kids and how the kids are. You also see which parents are involved.

When there is a problem, it is best to follow the chain of command, but document everything. Seriously. I can not stress this enough. Followup with emails. "Per our conversation...."

My cousins sent there kids to Garland. Did you know your child MUST be present the first day of school or you can lose your slot at the school of your choice?