Awkward Post

Updated on December 20, 2011
J.S. asks from Green Cove Springs, FL
21 answers

We are headed back home to Missouri on Wednesday (yay!), so I put a post on Facebook about it. Now I have people that I haven't seen since highschool making comments like, "We should get together or I hope to see you!" Ummmm.....no. LOL It's nice that they want to see me, but we are only there for a limited time, and that is usually reserved for family and close friends.

So do you respond to the comments from these other people or just ignore them? I feel kinda rude not saying anything, but I feel rude by saying no too! Anybody else have this issue?

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So What Happened?

Hmmm....I never thought that they were just being polite! lol I guess I am a different sorta creature, if I tell someone that I hope to see them or that we should get together, it means I actually want together with them, and will probably try to arrange something. I guess I am too literal.

Jo: You're so funny! Yep we will be in Springfield, but we did spend four years in St. Louis while my husband attended Logan college, and still have some really good friends that are up there.

We do have a house/dog sitter coming. :)

Thanks for the safety concerns. I only allow my posts to be seen by friends, I only add people I know. All of them live across the country. Lol I did also mention having a house sitter, so the house isnt empty. I also mentioned how lucky we were to have such good neighbors that they are keeping an eye on the house (one is a cop) which is all true. I pretty much covered all my bases.

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C.J.

answers from Dallas on

Not to be a "fakey mcfakerson" but I always respond - "That would be great!" But then leave it up to them to call me, set up time, etc. If it doesn't work out, then it doesn't work out, but it is on them. No biggie.
(I think it is funny, we are leaving for MO on Wednesday too and I am SOOOexcited).
Safe travels.

2 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Ditto to Jo!

It's only because they are being polite.

We went to VA Beach over the summer for just on night. I have a "friend" who lives there and we are on FB together. She saw we were coming and wanted to get together. I haven't spoken to her in YEARS other than FB. We both then found reasons to not get together :). It was just us trying to be polite to each other really. If we were going for more than one night, I'd gladly get together - but we were rushed for time as it was.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

J.:

You aren't being rude by saying - I would LOVE to see you as well!! We are only going to be in St. Louis for 24 hours...we plan another trip in May - can we get together then?

Don't ignore them - that would be rude.

It's not rude to say NO. It's okay to state we are there for a limited time or my family has our schedule booked solid. We are planning a relaxing trip in 2012.

I went back to CA for my HS reunion. I flew in on Thursday afternoon/evening - had dinner with my sister and grandmother - drove up the hill (1.25 hours) to my parents house...went to bed...woke up Friday morning went shopping with my sister and grandmother, had dinner with my GF who lives in Tehachapi, bed, woke up, had breakfast and drove back down the hill to my GFs house. Went to reunion. Got up Sunday AM and flew home....friends that weren't in my class were upset that we didn't get together. when I told them my schedule after the fact - they said OOOHH!! GOTCHA!!!

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M.B.

answers from Washington DC on

I'd say:

"It would be nice to see you all, but I believe my family has me booked for every hour, LOL:) Maybe during a less-busy visit! Happy Holidays!"

4 moms found this helpful

L.A.

answers from Austin on

Do not worry about it, I agree with saying, gosh I am so touched by all of you, but this is a quick trip to see our folks..

"Maybe I need to plan a time to get together with all of you some time next year.. "

I had a friend that did something interesting. She said they would be driving through Austin on Thursday at about 2:00 and was going to stop and have lunch at a particular restaurant and would love to see anyone that would like to meet up for an hour.. And sooo. Guess what? I was already going to be there with another lunch.. so I will just stay and join her! There have been a few others that have replied saying they are going to do their best to go!

4 moms found this helpful

F.H.

answers from Phoenix on

This happened to us when we went to CA this last summer. We ended up posting that we would be at such and such pizza parlor from 5pm - 8pm and if anyone wanted to join us and buy their own pizza, come on over! (We wanted to make sure they knew we were NOT buying pizza for everyone lol!) We had about 8 show up and it was a great time. We have also just said that its a "quick trip" and we will hope to see everyone another time. We also did this once and met everyone at the beach. Just said our family would be there on whatever day and if you want to come visit, come over. That time we had 3 other families come and the kids had fun playing with "new' friends. Good luck!!!

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J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Most people want to say something and that is the go to response. Very few actually expect you to get together.

If you want to respond the canned answer is that would be a blast/fun/great if only I had the time. :)

I just had a wicked thought, say oh my god that would be great! What time is good for you??! Then watch them squirm since they never dreamed you would have time to do anything. :p

Cheryl, Springfield or I would have been stalking her here. Just kidding, I gave up stalking, the legal fees were just too much. :p

3 moms found this helpful

L.M.

answers from Kansas City on

send them Private messages... I personally don't like to update my status every single time I fart... so I only put the most important things like anniversary dinner (how it went, or where we went - after the fact). If you feel bad just send them a Privat Message explaining.

Season's greetings to you and yours..

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K..

answers from Phoenix on

People always say things like that... "Let's get together", "Let's do a play date", etc., and the likelihood of them having the time or even following through is probably not that high, especially during the holidays. You leave it in their court & if they really want to see you, they'll call. Don't feel bad.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

You can say, "Not sure what we'll be able to fit in, but I'll let you know!" or something. There is NEVER enough time to see everyone. If you are at loose ends one night and want to do dinner out, invite them along (maybe) and see several people at once. But don't worry about it too much.

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R.B.

answers from La Crosse on

My husband always replies with well I will be at my parents house so you know where to find me.

Needless to say.. no one ever shows, but they will try to call him and ask him to come to xyz and he tells them no, Im here seeing my parents come on over. nope still don't come over.

If your afraid some will show up to your families house and you don't want that.. then reply with ~ I would love to see you! But this time around Im spending it with family, sorry.

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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

safety 1st, please! Don't post future plans on FB....that's how you end up with theft/robbery! It's just like with weddings/funerals.....it's always best to have someone stay at your home during these life events.

& we're all guilty of it....last Thurs, I posted how much I was looking forward to our Family Christmas party & my BF called me & reprimanded me! I told her to read it again....I just posted that I was looking "forward" to it.....not the location of the party! (she knew it was out of town :)

As for your question: a simple "Oh, I wish we could....but we're all Family'd Up on this trip"..... all said with a smile!

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M.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Respond with 'hope so too. Our schedule's pretty tight, but maybe we'll see you out and about!'

If you know that you'll be having dinner at a certain restaurant, respond with 'maybe we can meet up for dessert at .....'

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D.B.

answers from Charlotte on

Instead of ignoring them, just write back on each person's wall how much you would have loved to have been able to work it out to see them. How kind they are to want to see you, etc. You will garner much more good will with them like this, than ignoring them.

I would say that some people would think that they would have been rude to NOT have mentioned wishing they could see you. It's all in the way you look at it, J..

How lovely that they want to see you. Some people don't care, and you are lucky that they aren't that way about you!

Dawn

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K.R.

answers from Decatur on

I hate that! I know what you mean!

I usually private message the person and tell them my fam has me booked solid but if I have a spare moment I will call and hope they are doing well!

I don't think most people are really thinking they are going to see you, nor would they be offended if they don't. They are being polite.

Have a good trip!

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I always take some time to feed the kids someplace like McDonalds and tell everyone if they want to see me that's where I'll be a such and such a time and for how long. It really works and there is never a time when more than a couple of them show up.

I think it is fun to see everyone and then they get to see each other too. It is pretty harmless to spend an hour or two a year to allow others to stop in and say hi.

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C.S.

answers from Las Vegas on

It all sounds like the uniform thing we do here in passing, "Goodmorninghowareyou?", "Goodthankyouhowareyou?".

I would probably tell them you will have to meet up on another trip, as you are there for a short time, but you miss them all.

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L.R.

answers from Washington DC on

Does you post say your family is going out of town and when you're leaving?!

Forget the issue of friends responding. You have just let the world know your house will be empty, and when. I've seen too many news reports and articles saying that this kind of post is an invitation for burglars to come on by -- you won't be there. You have a house sitter coming- great. Does the house sitter know you've publicized the fact you're away?

And it sounds like your page isn't very limited as far as who sees it, if people you havent' seen since high school found it and responded. Please pull your post or alter it so it's not obvious you are leaving town. Though it may be too late; it's been up there for others to see.

Safety issue, security issue, and social issue too - this is why we don't do Facebook.

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

They probably really don't mean it. Just ignore them.

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I.X.

answers from Los Angeles on

It was probably just an acknowledgment of your coming to town. No need to explain that its family time. Just don't reply to the comments. If they follow up with you, then you will need to come up with excuses.

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J.B.

answers from Atlanta on

They're probably just being polite. Just say, "That would be great -maybe we'll run into each other!" Unless it's someone you truly want to meet up with -then private message them. Everyone is so busy this time of year, most people probably don't have the time, but they say things to be nice. Kind of like saying, "Just fine -and you?" when asked how you're doing and you're NOT fine at all!

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