At Wits End with Potty Training 3 Year Old Daughter!!!

C.,
I don't think you've screwed anything up.... kids will learn things at their own pace, and I'm sure the pediatrician has told you this also. My daughters were born February 2006 also. They were trained in August of last year, but we had to train them. We used the timer and used it for about two weeks straight, every 1/2 hour the timer went off and we sat in the bathroom. We bought the huggies clean team soap with a lighting hippo head that they were only allowed to use if they went pee or poop. Then we bought the clean team wipes and they were only allowed to use if they went poop (we call them poopy wipes in our house). Those parents who look at you funny cause your three year old is in a pull-up - hey, their kids are not perfect, whether it was potty training, taking away the binkie or bottle, etc. You know what your child is capable of, and they don't. Good luck, she'll come along eventually :-)

Hi Cassie,
I know how you feel, don't feel like a failure, it has more to do with your daughter than you. She isn't ready and pushing her or punishing her in my opinion won't work and may make it worse. I was frustrated too, but talked with my ped. and he reassured me that everything would work out and NOT to force the issue.
My son was 3 1/2 before he was completely potty trained. He would do well with peeing but wanted NOTHING to do with pooping on the potty. He would yell no when I asked him to try on the potty (we could also tell when he had to go, but would run him to the potty and nothing would happen) and so I decided taking him to the potty kicking and screaming was not helping anything. We ended up having him wear underwear and when he had to poop he would ask for a pull up. I let him do this for a while and out of the blue one day he said Daddy, I want to poop on the potty, and from then on he was trained. I truly believe it has to be on their terms, when they are ready. Every child is different. I have friends whose kids were potty trained right at two and others who were closer to 4. Don't push it, she'll only hate it more.
Some kids have fears of the potty, losing control, falling in, etc.
As for other's comments, that's just out of line and they should mind their business. Don't even acknowledge it.
Good luck!!

When she messes her pants do you clean it up or her. My nephew was having the same problem with potty training (esp. w/going #2 in the potty). My sister finally started making him clean it up every time he had an accident (including poop). She would make him go put it in the potty, flush it and then wash out his pants. She just made sure that he washed his hands good afterwards...and of course she finished cleaning up the area after he was done with a lysol wipe. I would do this in conjunction with a sticker chart to reward all of the good times.

I did a sticker chart with my son when he first started and it worked great. My oldest (when he was about 3 1/2) went through a phase where he thought it was fun to pee all over the floor in the bathroom...I went to the "you make a mess, you clean it up" rule. After cleaning up his own "mess" a few times, I never had that problem again.

Hope this helps.

PS someone said some thing about first graders still having potty issues. I taught in the elementary schools for 6 years before becoming a stay at home mom. If a FIRST GRADER is still having problems (during the day) that is NOT COMMON!!!!!!!!!!!! and is an issue that needs to be addressed.

Believe me dear you have NOT screwed up. All children do not mature at the same as another. It is like saying well Jimmie did that at 3 but Jane didn't do the same thing until she was 4. Never worry about family or friends who look or say something against what you do. Your Riley will potty train when her body is ready to no matter how hard you try to push her. Relax you sound like a wonderful mother. As my son said once when I said his cousin is already potty trained, and his daughter wasn't, he said we aren't running a race with anyone Enough said.

Hi C.,

I've had a similar experience in training my son who will be 4 in July. He is VERY intelligent (not just saying that b/c I'm his mom) and picks up things very quickly. My daughter, who is 17th months older was a breeze to train, so needless to say with him its been a completely new and failure-like experience. He still sleeps in a pull-up and if we don't take it off right when he wakes up he will just go in it, and the most challenging is that he refuses to poopy in the potty. We've tried everything you've mentioned, rewards, praise, structure, punishment and nothing seemed to work and all of us were completely stressing out and not making the situation any better. I read about training in the book "Happiest Toddler on the Block" and it was very insightful in calling attention to the fact that potty training can just be too overwhelming for some kids, and the attention, be it good or bad is too much and too stressful. We now "allow" my son to tell us when he needs to go and let him go in a pull-up, but still have him sit on the potty a few times a day. I'm not sure this is the best way to handle, I'm sure many will say not, that he's controlling the situation, but I know he's not going to go in his pants until he's 12! And, when some time has passed and its less stressful, it will happen. In the meantime, we've all just chilled out a bit.

You should check out the info in the book. Hope this is helpful!

Baby girl you are NOT alone. I too am a Mama of a very stubborn 3.5 year old. We started last August with the potty training. I pushed the issue because he showed zero intrest. Once we started, he was so into it and was perfect for almost a week, then something clicked and he decided he wasn't going to poop in the potty anymore. REALLY ANNOYING!! I was OVER changing pants. I went with it for awhile because I thought I pushed the issue on him. He said he was scared of the "big potty" so I created a magic friend out of a wooden spoon and we tried using that to "magically take away anything that was scary about the potty". NO GO... big flop.

So I began reading this book HAVE A NEW KID BY FRIDAY by Dr. Kevin Leman. Remember... I said he was stubborn. Well, I read the book for a completely different reason, but I found my answer in the book. CONSEQUENCES. How stinkin simple is that?! We started little by taking away things that would get to him. First it was toys he slept with, then toys in his room. The chair we read stories in at night, I GOT ALL THE WAY DOWN TO WHERE HE HAD HIS BLANKEY, PILLOW AND A MATTRESS!!!! Yeah.. no kidding. After weeks upon weeks of taking things away, I'd run out of ideas. So.. we started doing room time. Started at 15 minutes and worked our way up. NONE of it phased him until the sunshine came out one day. I decided to hit him where it counts... I took little brother out to play and left my oldest with the window open and his room baby gated shut. That way he could hear us having fun for an hour without him. That child has pooped in the potty every day since. We gradually rewarded his behavior by returning his things one at a time until it was permanent behavior.

Moral of the story, if she's truly ready and just stubborn, find what gets to her and take it away until she gives you the behavior you are asking of her. The book is a great read. It takes some changing not only on the kiddos part, but on the parents as well. Hope it helps you like it did me. Best wishes!!!

You're getting just as frustrated as we got with our oldest!! :)

No you haven't screwed this up beyond repair. She's doing what every other child does - she doens't want to take the time to go potty because she's having too much fun doing other things.

First order of business (no pun intended) is to relax. She is 3 years old after all. I remember in 1st grade some of the kids still had issues with pottying.

Second, the only thing that worked for us pretty successfully was (aside from using the timer) to add a "potty first" rule. Any time she wants to change activities, asks for a drink, wants to do something different than before (go from coloring to playing with dolly's), potty first. "You can do that, but you have to go potty first."

Good luck!

Don't give up sweetie; she will get potty trained. I know a family that could not potty train their daughter- age 5!; they took her to a counselor who told them to give her a penny to put in a bank each time she went. It only took a couple of more weeks and she was trained. Probably having to go to a complete stranger and talk about it cured her!

Kids sense parents' frustration; sometimes this helps them to learn and sometimes it hinders. Just relax about it. Put the training undies on her or 2-3 pair panties. At least it will be less mess. Make her clean up the mess- paper towel the floor, put panties in wash mach, rinse poopie ones in toilet- Every time she messes. Confine her to the kitchen (or room with lanoleum so she is not messing carpet). Don't feel bad about putting a diaper on her to take her places. It is a necessity right now until she gets totally trained.

She knows what she is supposed to do. It is just taking her a little longer to get it.
If anyone says anything about her not being potty trained, tell them to ask her.

You have not screwed up beyond repair.
I don't know any teens who wear Pullups!
However, your daughter has discovered how to pull your chain big time!
Here is my recommendation:
Make a Potty Chart (or use a large calendar), with her name on it.
Get some sticky stars and colorful stickers.
Stars are for peeing.(If you can't find stars, get those small happy face stickers.)
Stickers are for pooping.
In the potty of course.
Put the chart someplace where she will see it often, and at her level.
Explain to your daughter that each time she pees in the potty she can put a star on the chart.
If she poops, she will get a pretty sticker.
At the end of a week, if she has a certain number of stars and stickers (the first week, say 20) she will get to spend $1 at the Dollar Store.
Or, you can just say that everytime she accumulates 20 she will get a trip to the $Store.
Be sure to cross off the 20 when she gets her reward.
If you do this for a month or 6 weeks, you won't be broke and she will probably be trained.
Leave it up to her as much as you can.
And be matter-of-fact about it.
Don't hover.
No pee, no star.
No poop, no sticker.
If she is not cooperating after a month, then I might resort to removing a star or sticker from the chart if she seems to be deliberately peeing or pooping in her pants.
Hope this helps.

You are not alone! My youngest daughter will turn 3 in early May and she really has no interest in being potty trained. I am not stressing out about it as I figure it will be much easier when we're home for the summer and when she's wearing less clothes. Kids often dictate when they're ready ... and it really has nothing to do with when the parents start the process. My goal is to have my daughter fully potty trained by the time preschool starts up again in late August. Stop listening to the people who berate you for how you handle your parenting duties.

C.,
Thank you for being upset by this! I'm sure that others will disagree and have already posted different opinions.

This topic is a very personal one. You have to do what you feel is best for your child, no matter which viewpoint you decide to accept and the heck with others.

I completely disagree with "they'll do it when they are ready". I am a teacher and I am seeing more and more children not be able to start preschool or even Kindergarten because they aren't potty trained. My nephew still at almost 6 can't clean himself because the doctor told my sister-in-law "oh he'll do it when he's ready".

I was extremely lucky and both my boys were trained by 26 months. Yes, many say they trained me, but I wasn't paying for the pricey diapers any longer than I had to. My youngest was completely independent with going by 30 months. We are working on him cleaning himself.

We sat them on the toilet backwards (no mess on the floor from overshooting), every hour NO matter where we were, or what we were doing. They just had to try, If nothing came out, then nothing came out. We also took my younger son to choose his own potty seat that no one else could touch. My mom used a chart and when it was full we got to go to the store to choose a special toy (under $5, then). This gave us control over the situation but we respected her authority over us.

I do believe every child is different. Relax and do what you feel is best. ??? Possibly the fact that your pregnant is causing the process to take longer. ???

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time. I know a friend of mine who had the same trouble. I think it can easily become a battle if you let it. Have you tried letting her go without any clothes on around the house? My daughter would do better that way. I know it's havoc on furniture and floors, but it may be worth a try. Or just let her poop her pants and let her sit in it for awhile, act like it doesn't bother you and don't make a big deal about it. Maybe if she sees someone her age doing it it would interest her more. Don't let your family get you down. If you let it get to you, she will sense the tension and it will make her want to do it less. Some kids just are not ready until they are ready. You can only do so much, the rest is up to the child, and if they feel like they are getting pushed, they will push back. Hope this helps.

I'm sorry but the line about why she can't do the potty like other kids her age really hit me. I am the mother of 4 kids and each child is different. There is no rule that a child has to be potty trained by 3. YOu have to not worry what other people think and do what is right for your child. If you push her and punish her when it is not the right time for her you may be doing more harm than good. You are a SAHM so you don't have to be rushed to have her potty trained for day care. Relax and take your time and watch your child's actions. Read her cues. You are also making this a bad experience for your self too. This shouldn't be that painful for both of you. Forget what everyone else is telling you and if they get pushy tell them to mind their own business. Otherwise don't discuss it and don't make a big deal about it. My 10 year old still has accidents and each child's body is different and every bladder is a different size. SOme kids are very focused and do not recognize the needs of their bodies all the time. Please save the punishment for when she is really naughty. SHe is not doing this on purpose and is probably confused.

Hello C., I did read that you tried the sticker chart. Did you get what SHE wanted. EX: My daughter LOVES horses and ladybugs well at that time she did lol. When she did #1 she got 1 sticker and #2 she got 2 and SHE put them on chart PLUS I would make it a game with her. I would do it EVERY TIME she got up AS SOON as she woke up and she would say NO I am ok I said WELL I am going to beat you and OFF she went running and FLOWED out lol. It took about 3 mo for her and she was 2 when she was trained and NO accidents at night since then... GOOD luck. We have a 20 mo son and he has been going for about 2 mo now and he will go sit on it his own BUT with diaper on lol BUT he knows that where he needs to go. He is funny b/c he will do #2 and come to me and say EWW MOM and walk me to his room to change him and IF it is hard I will put it in the toilet and HE will flush it and say BYE BYE to it lol then he will clap so he understands that is where it goes lol... Good luck once again... Hope your back gets better...

Hi C., Do a search on the "Potty Whisperer". She's FAB ! As the other responders said, make her clean up her messes. And only use underwear ! No pull ups. The "Potty Whiperers" philosophy is that a child needs to be responsible for their pottying, PERIOD ! They learn real quick that their messes and having to clean them up isn't fun, and they'll quickly reverse their thinking. She says she can have children potty trained within a weekend. So, it's just time to conduct the hard knox approach with your daughter. It's the cause and effect philosophy. It works. Let us know how things go in the next few weeks. Good Luck.

Don't stress and don't listen to people that are going to judge you.....

You daughter sounds like she is very strong willed and yes she knows exactly what she is supposed to do but the more you push the more trouble she is going to give you!!!!! I would back off even drop the subject for a little while. If she chooses to go then help her let her know what a good job she is doing (but not to much don't go crazy.)

Just keep telling yourself eventually every child learns to use the potty, I have yet to meet an adult that is STILL in a diaper!!!!

Good Luck, your daughter sounds just like mine and she was 3 1/2 before we were potty trained (and maybe even a little older than that before I could trust her all night.)

Once my kids went potty and poop on the potty, they were punished for accidents. Of course, there were incidents where they weren't because accidents do happen, and I was sure to make them realize that. BUT, after the first week of potty training, when I knew they knew what was expected, they were punished. They usually had to stand in the corner after taking off their own wet clothes and put them in a laundry basket or the washing machine. Why WOULD kids want to take the time to go poop or potty in the toilet, separate from all their family and toys, when they could just go in their pants like they've always done and get away with it? I know you said you've tried punishing her, but without consistency, punishments don't work. If you are going to punish her, do it every single time, don't stop just because you don't think it's working. As far as outings go, she should definitely be wearing only underwear no matter what during the day, except maybe at naptime, but I had pullups cut out after a week during naptime, and after 2 weeks overnight. They have to learn to take responsibility for themselves, and if that means they have to wet their pants/bed/sheets a few times before they realize that they DON'T want to do it again, then that's what needs to happen. My daughter only wet the bed once, my son never did, so it's mainly how you handle things during the day that determine how their nights, naps, and outings go. What I would do to change things around is this, the next morning when she wakes up, tell her that she is no longer going to wear pullups, totally throw them out, and that if she poops her pants or pees in her pants, ______ happens. Make sure every single time she has an accident, you stay consistent. It could be she loses TV for an hour, it could be time in the corner, time in a naughty chair, or even time for laying down in her room. Whatever it is, do the same thing everytime so she's able to predict the consequences for her not going in the toilet. When you're out in public, just throw a grocery bag and an extra change of clothes in a diaper bag. If she has an accident, oh well, it's not something that's going to keep happening over and over, but if you take the easy way out and keep putting pullups on her for the sake of not having to deal with an accident out in public, then she's not going to learn to be responsible with her bathroom urges. It's probably very confusing to her that sometimes she's allowed to pee in her pants and sometimes she's not. Pullups need to go, even at night. That way she learns that there is NO right time to pee or poop your pants. If she poops her pants, make HER be the one dump the poop in the toilet. Let her take part in the cleanup before she is disciplined. She's just needs accountability, then the accidents will stop, and she needs the confusion with the pullups to stop. try it, I bet you'll see she's completely potty trained in a matter of days.

I am nearing the end of the potty training journey with my 3 1/2 old son. I think he just pees himself in defiance now when he is mad at me or his dad. It is so much a control issue with the kids, and you certainly should not feel like you are a failure or doing something wrong.

What FINALLY worked for me was taking away a big boy toyt every time he peed or pooped in his diaper. I told him he wasn't allowed to wear big boy underwear beacause they weren't for pooping and peeing in like a baby. I told him that if he wanted to be a baby, that was fine. BUT, he wasn't going to get to play with things that weren't for babies. I kept telling him to let me know when he wanted to be a big boy. One of my friends had told me that this was the suggestion of their pediatrician...to use reverse psychology (If you want to be a baby...be a baby. That's fine.). My son is way into Thomas. So, every time he went in his pants, I had him GIVE me a Thomas train. If he wouldn't give me one, I'd take one and show him what I took. I told him they were MINE because I was a big girl, and someday he would get them all back when he was a big boy. So, I had a different reward (gummy bears) for going on the potty. I gave him three gummy bears for peeing and eight for pooping on the potty. I had quite the collection of my own trains before my son decided that he really wanted to get them back. Obviously, you could use this tactic with any variety of toys. I gave them all back when he stayed accident free for 5 days in a row.

So, that was what worked for me! Good luck!

A.

Your daughter sounds like she is having some fun with you. She probably senses the change with baby #2 coming and this way she keeps the focus on her. I would just reinforce her successes and not make a huge deal over those "accidents". As long as there is nothing medically wrong ( and really I don't know her, but I can tell she is bright), just be patient...she will not be pottying at her graduation!

Blessings to you~

While I don't have any super-fabulous "how-to" advice I did want to share something someone shared with me. We waited to potty tain our son until he was 2 and a half because that's when we felt he was ready. Thankfully, our potty training went very smoothly BUT...we did get lots of nasty comments from family about waiting that long to potty train. My pastor's wife said to me one day, "No kid is in highschool NOT potty-trained and they certainly don't stand around while in line to get their driver's license asking eachother, 'so how old were you when you got potty trained'...it'll happen when it happens." So, while right now you feel like a failure as a Mother, it WILL all come together. You never know, your daughter may enjoy the extra attention she gets from you being stressed even. I'd say take a deep breath and try to remember she will one day soon be potty trained. :) I hope that helps.

Potty training is hard and you aren't a failure. However, never punish for accidents, it just creates more. No yelling, no scolding, nothing but positive reinforcement for using the potty.
Any time there is an accident, make her practice getting to the potty from where ever she was when she had the accident. Have her practice telling you she needs to go, walk to the potty, take her pants down and sit on the potty. Do it 5 times any time she has an accident.

Let me say you are not the only one having this issue. My twins didn't do it until almost 4yo. I've said this before who ever said a 2yo is supposed to potty train was absolutely stupid. I know few kids who actually did it at 2. You've got to remember this....this is something you can't make your kids do, they will do it in there own time and punishing for it is the worst thing to do. You need to put her in the pull-ups, put pottys around the house, and tell her they are there for her to use when she feels ready. Yes, she knows what is expected of her, but you can't make her do it. This is something they have the control over and the more of a "bad thing" you make it, the more they will push not to do it. And you know what, this as well as numerous other things that are going to come along with parenting, you can't worry about what others say and think. If your family is giving you a hard time, you've got to stay calm and just look at them and say, "you know what, we've tried and obviously she's not ready so she'll do it in due time." And then remove yourself from that family member or whoever you're with. Hope this helps ease a little of your frustration. Goodluck

I sympathize with you. All my kids seemed to be late on the potty training issue. They are now 17, 14 and 13 and all use the toilet. My point is it will eventually happen. I know it is frustrating when people comment but try to ignore them. Potty training at this age is not considered a milestone. I think we feel the pressure to accomplish this but should not. I feel like you can't force a toddler to deficate and urinate or eat. I would just keep her in pull ups all the time. Life is hard enough without adding all the extra clean up and stress. I do not feel you started to late; I do not feel it is your fault. I would definetely call your pediatrician and ask their opinion. Then if a relative or anybody has the nerve to ask about your childs voiding habits you can tell them "My pediatrician said blah, blah, blah. I think you will feel better when you talk to the DR and I am pretty sure he/she will agree with me. Good luck

When my oldest was 3 we had trouble too. I made a special calendar just for her. Her favorite character at the time was Barney so I bought a couple of big Barney stickers as well as smaller star stickers. I posted it on the refrigerator and every time she used the potty SHE got to put a small sticker on the calendar. If there were no accidents at the end of the day she put a large Barney sticker on it. At the end of the week she was so involved with putting stickers on the calendar that she hadn't had an accident for days. We then told her we were out of diapers and she would have to wear big girl panties from then on.
For her it worked like a charm.

Good luck with your little one and don't get too frustrated. It does get better! Mine are 18 and 15 and I enjoy every day with them.

Do you have other kids in the family about the same age as her? I only ask because we had problems potty training my one nephew. They didn't wait that long to start training but you did what you thought was the best for your child. Every child is different so try not to worry so much that you "screwed this up". Relax. Anyways, the reason that I asked about the other kids is this. My nephew, no matter what we did, had no interest in learning to use the potty. But one day I had him and another nephew of mine for the day. Every time Jarod (who was older and potty trained) went potty Jacob wanted to go potty too because the big boys do it that way. By the end of the day, Jacob was potty trained. Not to say that he didn't have the occasional accident, that is to be expected from time to time. But it helped to have another boy about his age there who was already potty trained. He thought it was great to go like the big boys. Other than that, you just have to keep working with her. And as far as the fact that she refuses to poop in the potty, here is a trick that might help with that. Next time she poops in her pants take her in the bathroom and put the poop in the toilet and flush. Show her where it's supposed to go. This will have to be done a few times but it should help. Other than that you just have to keep working with her, have patience, and pay no attention to the opinions of others. It will happen in good time. Just keep trying to put her on the potty, don't stress about accidents, and show her where the poop is supposed to go. This has helped other kids I have taken care of. Good luck.

I agree with K. T. Stop stressing about it. She WILL get there. It won't be on your terms, but on hers. Most of the time, if the parent backs off, the kid doesn't feel the stress and starts on their own. And, also, stop listening to other people. My mom gave me a lot of grief when my son was that age. We waited until he was ready and it only took a couple of days. You are the parent and you make the rules, not all those other people.

To add to your already mountain of good advice, I can appreciate your frustration. Our daughter was interested in the potty since 16 months, but not serious about it until recently. Charts and rewards were boring to her and punishment produces the opposite effect of what is desired.

A couple of things that worked for us... Pulls ups are too much like diapers, so she couldn't differentiate between them. I eventually chose a week where I stayed home and yes, this may sound strange, but let her play naked from the waist down all day (except for nap time and eating). It took about 2 days to prevent the pee pee accidents (helps if you have linoleum), but then she graduated to "big-girl" panties. We continued to use pull-ups for a little while ONLY when we would go shopping or outings because she would have little accidents when too distracted by other kids or toys, etc. But as soon as we got home, off they came.

Secondly, our daughter is an only child and has little exposure to older children, but loves them, so I started baby-sitting a 3 1/2 year old girl who was well potty trained. When she went to potty, my daughter (wanting to be a big girl like her) went, too. Her dad & I would also celebrate our bathroom achievements when we went, telling each other, "Hey Dad, Mom went poo-poo on the potty!" and giving everyone a high-5, making a big deal of it. (Yes, I know it sounds corny.) Took less than a week to have a no poo-poo in her panties day, but she rarely ever has an accident now!

Best of luck!

good luck with the potty training! I had trouble with my daughter too. I didn't push it either. I had the attitude when she was ready it would all fall into place...started to wonder if it would ever happen! Finally I started to tell her that if she wanted to go to preschool so she could learn all kinds of new things and meet new kids that she would have to be potty trained and it worked. So I just wanted to wish you luck since I have been there!

Don't feel bad. My son just turned 3 last month and just started taking in interest in sitting on the potty. We are going to start trainning next week but he still poops in his diaper and he doesn't squat when he does it. I have been told that he will be ready when he is ready. So I am telling you the samething. For the people who give you looks and flack let them unless they are willing to help then tune them out. Take it one day at a time and try to stay patient.

My only experience has been with my son. I really began to stress out because we kept trying to potty train and nothing really seemed to work. He'd show interest and we'd start and then he'd just get frustrated and I was frustrated because I had people telling me he should be potty trained by now, etc.
My sitter could tell I was stressed and kept telling me he'll do it when he's ready and not to worry - that he would be potty trained before kindergarten. Finally, I said that's it - I'm backing off. The pediatrician said to switch him to pull ups, with the idea that he'd start to notice when he was wet. We'd ask if he wanted to use the potty and take him into the bathroom with us but no charts, etc.

He was trained by 4 (pee and poop). I used pull ups at night for a little while just because I wasn't sure if he'd make it thru the night but HE DID! No nighttime accidents and only 2 daytime and those were both because the adult he was with couldn't get him to a bathroom fast enough.

With our daughter, we'll probably get a little potty to introduce at 18mo and see how it goes. Unfortunately I think I got rid of our "Potty Power" dvd so I will get another (I really liked it with our son - it wasn't immediate but I do think it helped.) But I don't think I'll actually "train". I'll just introduce it sooner and follow her cues. I'm still amazed at how well it went for my son when he was ready.
I loved the one response where they had her go try when she wanted to do something else - start playing a different game, go outside, etc. I never thought about that but I always ask our son before we go outside, go to the store, etc. Also the baby and big girl response. The Potty Power dvd mentions this some.

All kids are different so the same things won't work for all.

Also, didn't see this mentioned and I didn't have a problem with it but if she is trained before the baby arrives she may revert back when you bring the baby home (especially since it's less than 6 mo away!). The idea of not being the baby anymore and seeing you change the baby's diapers... Hopefully at 3 she'll want to be more "little mommy" and help with getting diapers, etc.

GOOD LUCK and please DON'T stress!

Relax, you haven't screwed up a thing and give my name and number to the family members who criticized you in the past. I think this little girl wants things on her terms. Think of ways to give her control over the situation. I think she can do it but she gets some type of satisfaction by peeing in her pants. Plus, quit getting upset if she pees in her pants or the potty. My guess is that she likes to upset you a little. Of course that is easier said than done. As far as pooping, take it one step at a time. There is usually about a year between peeing on the potty then pooping. I promise you that she will not wear pull ups to kindergarten.

Oh my, my,my--why do you care what other people think?? It's your daughter, and it is no skin off their nose if she wears a pull up until she is thirty years old. Don't allow people to make you have doubts about your parenting skills!!NO child learns at the same rate, and maybe she has a bladder infection, or yeast infection, and just maybe she get more attention for not using the potty!!!! Ignore it, put her back in pull ups for another month and say nothing to her, about using the potty!!!and By all means DO NOT punish her for not using the potty, as hard as it may be on you. And remember she is not a baby , but she isn't a child of 5 or 6 either. And the next time some one has the gaul to ask you why your daughter isn't potty trained yet, ask them just as blantally , what their need to know is. Good luck!

Try starting a sticker reward chart. KIDS LOVE STICKES! Everytime she goes in the potty SHE gets to put a sticker on the chart. Everytime she has an "accident" you put an "X" over a sticker. When she gets a whole row or chart filled up (you decide what the goal is) she gets to do something simple but special (pick a special movie to watch, go to the dollar store and pick one item, have a friend spend the night, etc.). When is "reward" is given, praise her for EARNING(NOT GETTING)it and remind her how she can earn another one. The chart will help her see her progress and is a constant visual reminder. When she has an "accident", gently remind her to keep trying so she can have her "Special".

You didn't screw her up forever. I guess it is time to revert to the old, if you want to be a baby then you get to be a baby routine. Big girls use the potty and babies do not. If you want to be a big girl, have big girl toys and privelages you will use the potty, if you want to go in your pants and be a baby then treat her like one. No more big girl toys or privelages until she behaves like a big girl and back into diapers. She will sit on the potty 45 minutes with water running. When she goes big smiles and hugs, if she doesn't and she wets her pants then it is a dry diaper and back to the play pen, crib, whatever with only baby toys to play with.