At What Age Do You Allow Facebook

Typicall I am a rule bender (my 10 year old has a cell phone and I let her jump on the bed. Sometimes she gets to decide what we have for dinner and occasionally that is ice cream). HOWEVER, facebook is a contractual agreement and THEY stipulate that users have to be 13.

So 13 it is.

To let them have a facebook account younger is teaching them to LIE and violate the rules just because everyone else does.

Another thing I'm a stickler on is front seat riding. IL says 13, so 13 it is. Not a week before her 13th birthday and not now even though ALL her friends sit in the front seat. The law says the safest place is the back seat until 13, so that is what we do.

If you have to lie about her age to get her a page, she's too young.
Think about the example you'll be setting for her if you set up a page for her and lie about how old she is. What will be next? Her lying about her age to get what she wants like to get into a movie, to buy cigarettes, then alcohol. It seems innocent enough because it's only a facebook page, but you're the one setting the standard not her friends or her friends parents.

I'm with you, when they are at least 13. I am amazed too by the parents that allow their child to do it sooner. I know a mom who lets her 9 and 7 year old have one. I think that's just crazy! A family member in my husbands family asked my 5 year old daughter if she was on facebook. I couldn't believe that! No my daughter won't be on until she meets the required age.

Tina,

YOU are the parent, YOU are the adult, not your 10 year old daughter. She is immature and can not understand the consequences of mistakes that can be made on the internet along with all the dangers that are out there. She is too young and immature. As her parent, you are in charge. You are her protector. Would you allow your daughter to play with a pack of wolves because other foolish parents allow their children to do so? My eldest child is older than your daughter. I do not allow him on Facebook. Children of any age should not be allowed on FB. Even 13 is too young.

Here's what happened to a teenage girl who used FB:
http://www.wptz.com/news/27788581/detail.html
Here's where they found her and with whom:
http://www.wptz.com/news/27837075/detail.html

More advice as to not allow your child on social networking sites:
http://news.cnet.com/8301-17852_3-20003912-71.html
http://www.life123.com/parenting/tweens-teens/social-netw...

As a parent, I hope you are teaching your child to obey rules. Facebook says NO ONE UNDER THE AGE OF 13 IS ALLOWED TO USE THEIR SITE. PERIOD!

M.D.

Yes, there are large numbers of underage people on Facebook. They delete roughly 20,000 underage accounts every day and that barely scratches the surface of the estimated 7 million that are there because their parents allow and/or create pages for their kids.
I've never been one to run with the lemmings.
If 7 million people do something stupid, the sheer number of them doing it does not make it any less stupid.
Kids (even teenagers) do not have the maturity to consider their audience when they post to public places. There's cyber bullying (kids/young adults have committed suicide over it), there's people who have lost jobs over it, there's stalkers and predators.
My son is 12. He's not interested in Facebook and he won't have an account as long as he lives in my house. At his age right now - he needs to be outside flying kites, riding bikes, chasing with the neighbors dog, etc. He's got a lifetime of sitting in front of a screen and keyboard and once he's an adult and on his own, if he wants a raging case of carpel tunnel syndrome, he can then pursue it with all his heart.
I feel I'm protecting his childhood and his right to play (outside) while he may.

This is a loaded subject for me. I'm not a fan of minors having FB profiles without their parents having 100% access and passwords to their profiles. There's just too much risk of online predators and online bullying. Children simply don't have the reasoning or decision making skills to know who is reliable and is a real friend and who should be blocked. Privacy settings don't mean much if the children know how to reset them when parents aren't checking them daily.

Right now my children don't have an online presence other than what I put out there. If my eldest had her way, the whole world would know our exact street address, my license number, my exact weight, and every thought that crosses her mind. So until she has better control of those impulses, and as long as she's living here, I'm going to limit her online access. If that means limiting it until she's got her own computer and has moved out of the house, so be it. :-)

I'm not sure there is an appropriate age. It depends on the maturity of the individual. My 13 year old son wants one, and I told him that if he had one I would be reading all posts, and if any of his friends posted inappropriate comments, I would be contacting their parents. He decided he didn't want me to be THAT parent, so he has opted not to get a facebook page yet. I think it was a wise decision.

I feel that the proper age for a face book page is when your child doesn't have to ask for permission to have one. Lol. That's just me.

Nope they will not get one.They can argue all they want about getting one I tell them it isn't for children they respond abck that so & so has one all I tell them is that they aren't my kids you are & I care about our privacy & what your able to obtain off the internet.
There was an article on CNN about a month ago that Face book deletes thousands of minor accounts daily,if they are doing that then there is a reason why.There is an age limit set to access the social networking site to protect our young viewers,now if they came out with one that geared to young children that only involved reading,math games & Disney characters then i'll accept that

Recipe for disaster. I think the 13 age minimum is too LOW. I think it just opens kids up to cyber bullying.

My daughter is almost 10 and she isn't the least bit interested in FB even though she sees me on it all the time.

She prefers being on Club Penguin where she can interact in real time with the other members through their characters. It's far more age appropriate and more fun!

So we haven't had to deal with this issue yet, but when we do, the answer will be no until she's at least 13, maybe older.

My daughter is 14 and no longer has one. She had from about 12 yrs old on, mainly family and a few close friends I knew. She started a new school this year and friended just about her whole old school as well as the new school. She had close to 400 friends - which I think is ridiculous. I was reading it (I don't have a facebook) and it was all innocent then this year, the language from her "friends" - who she swears she not really friends with, was apolling!! As I started making her unfriend these kids, she changed her password so I couldn't get in - so it's gone!! She's obviously not mature enough to have one.

My son is almost 15 and has had his FB page for about a year.
I monitor his activity, have his password(s) and the computer is in the family living areas of the house, so he basically has no privacy :)

As I tell him, until you can pay for it yourself, I get to see what you are doing. This goes for his cell phone, PS3, everything.

With that being said, I think 10 years old is a little too young for social networking, cell phones and text messaging. But mainly because I find that most parents do not "police" their children's social networking activities. All of it can have controls put in place that limit public access and/or monitor activities.

Oh, note about FB - you can type in any birthdate that you want - so a 10 year old can create accounts by just lying about their birth year.

Anyhoo, you need to do what you think is right and best for your family. What I do, what her friends do, none of that matters. Go with what you feel is appropriate.

God Bless

Well, until she's 13, you can legitimately say, "Other kids and their parents may choose to break the rules and violate the agreement they signed by going on at 10. But our family's values are to follow the rules and abide by any legal agreement we would sign. So nothing until you are 13." Let the rules do the work for you, and teach her that "just because your friends are doing it doesn't mean you get to violate our values to do it."

Now, with that said: My kid won't get Facebook until she is out of our house and old enough to pay for it all herself. As in, college or beyond. It's a minefield of social messes and a total invasion of privacy.

how about when the rules say, at 13?
khairete
S.

18, and out of my house and on their own computer.
Plus, I read an article last month that facebook was going thru the accounts whose ages were questionable and automatically deleting them. I wonder if it is really true and do you want to violate the user agreements? Something down the line could go wrong where facebook may be held liable but you get the poop end of the stick because you violated the user agreement. Just saying.

Well, I am going to go against the "norm" on this one and tell you that both of my kids have Facebook accounts and they are 8 and 10. I also have a facebook account myself so I know how it is used and how to find out what they are doing. My kids wanted facebook because they like to play the games. My 10 yr old is starting to add friends from school but he rarely chats with any of them. I do have one standing rule and that is I will have the passwords to all facebook, myspace, and email accounts for anyone under 18. This includes my foster kids and my kids' friends that want to use facebook at my house. I have had "the talk" with my kids about internet safety, and I have their privacy settings set so only friends can see what they post. The last thing is I have not set up their account using their last name. I set it up using their first and middle names. I know people will crucify me for allowing my kids on facebook at this age but as a parent I think you need to make that decision based on your values, your child's ability to handle it, and your willingness to stand firm on some ground rules. Good luck to you. I know it's not easy to say No but don't let her bully you into something you are not comfortable with.

The thing is this: If you let her get one now because so many of her friends have one, the next thing you know she'll be wanting to do other things that her friends are doing and since you let her have a facebook b/c all her friends have one...you see where I'm going with this?

My niece had one (she is also 10) and her mother made her delete it b/c she would see things on there that would cause fights with friends (it's hard to read how people mean things in text form) a 10 year old is not mature enough to handle things like facebook. There are also a lot of really sick people out there...

If you can come up with 3 really good reasons for her to have one then let me know. I can't come up with 1.

The rules are the rules. Thirteen. If other parents allow kids to break the rules - that's THEIR business...It is YOUR job to raise your daughter with morals and integrity....

I personally believe it's a matter of maturity. There are some younger kids who are mature for their age - however, the rules are 13...what is SOOOO important that she has to have one NOW?

Keep in mind that ANY social networking site has its dangers...bullying, inappropriate content, inappropriate contacting....one can get a TON of information off of a social networking site about where you live, etc. and it is a GREAT place for child predators....

You need to talk to your daughter about rules. Ask if the silly question - if all these other people were going to jump off a bridge - would you do it? It might help bring her into focus. Do you buy her expensive clothes just because "all her friends" have them? Do you buy her a i-phone or some other expensive cellular device because all of her other friends have one? If this is the case, then you have let your daughter rule the roost and have given in. Now she knows how to play you and will not give up because she knows you will give in.

GOOD LUCK!!

I'm a pretty relaxed parent (or rule bender as Brenna says, we jump on the beds as well ;), but out house rule is when FB rules allow or first day of college, whichever comes first.

There are many sites which allow for online interaction of children (xbox, roblox, wizard101, etc.) that have very detailed parental controls. FB does not want -nor do I blame them- to have parental controls. My son has *plenty* of other avenues to explore social networking in a monitored environment. He can use them until he is old enough to meet the site's own standards.

You know, I have a lot of writer friends who tell me that Facebook and other social media are wonderful places to "advertise" or keep up-to-date with fans/potential fans--not to mention with personal friends as well. And while I see the merit, I really don't have time to sit on the site, read fan mail, write something new to continously update my wallpaper, or figure out if I want to friend or befriend someone. Then I heard about how Facebook mines your information to pinpoint specific advertisements to you. Of how what you put on there can be distributed all over the place (other companies can mine/use your information. They'll say it isn't so--but I don't really trust large corporations. If they can exploit you to make a profit, they'll do so...). Then just today I read how hackers are using social media like Facebook to send you "personal" e-mail requests to get you to download malicious software. And I'm thinking: do I really want to spend that much time out of my busy-as-it-is day to sit in a virtual community with hundreds of "friends," of which probably only a handful are truly "friends?"

Not really. I just don't see what the big draw is for the social media sites. I have more than enough freelance work to keep me busy all day long; there really is no time to "go on-line" and waste more of it glancing through other peoples Facebook sites or answering e-mails or playing "games."

I know my husband keeps telling me I should get a Facebook page, because I work at home; he says it will make it so I'm not that isolated. I just told him I barely have enough time in the day to do my freelance work and check our three personal e-mails (our personal, my work, my writing); if he expects me to spend time with him and our daughter and get some housework and outside work done, then the social media needs to go by the wayside. This is the way I've felt about it for quite a while now, and everyday when I keep hearing this or that about problems looming in the social media landscape, I'm so glad that "my life" isn't out there in virtual cyberspace, where it potential can last "forever."

As for kids and social media/Facebook: I'm inclined to probably not allow my daughter to have one. Reading the stories about kids/teenagers being bullied and picked on and having their lives destroyed by what other kids or even professed "friends" put up on their Facebook pages or say to slam other kids--I mean, some of these teenagers have killed themselves over Internet bullying. And anything that's said, posted, or pictures put up are lost in electronic cyberspace for ever and ever. Are you as a mom/parent going to be able to daily watch/monitor what your daughter puts on hers? And what are you going to do if a "friend" befriends your daughter and then starts a malicious attack on her? There are so many disturbed people in the world right now...

I'm actually totally amazed that social media sites have taken off like they have. It doesn't say much about our society if we have to "hide" on the computer/Internet in order to have friends. Whatever happened to actually getting together?

I don't know; maybe my mind will change down the road. But right now, I just don't see what the intense draw is for these "friendship" or "relationship" sites.

I work as a school administrator and will hold this line as long as humanly possible, although by the time it's relevant (my son is 3) there will something else, I'm sure. Kids are cruel in person and even more cruel with an internet filter. Not all parents are vigilent about checking their childrens' pages and not all parents insist that their children "friend" them.

We had the local DA come and speak to our administrator's group a few months ago and they showed us some of "our kids" FB pages and it would make you sick to see what kids put up there. She suggested 16 or 17 as an age where there is some ability to "filter" what is being put online. At 10, they simply don't understand the long-term implications of the pictures and comments that they post.

I would make a rule about grades and at minimum being in HS on this one- more likely something about when she gets her license AND maintains her grades, she can have a FB page. Make sure you "search" her name though b/c someone on this site posted a related question and her son had opened an account at a friend's house!

My kids aren't allowed to get one until they're living on their own. Facebook can be dangerous for younger kids. In addition, when they hit the magical age of 13 where they're allowed to get one, they're still not mature enough to have one. Employers use Facebook to check on prospective employees and if they see pictures and posts that they made as children, they could miss out on a job, or get fired from a current job.

I know this isn't reasonable for all families, but if you do let her have a Facebook page, monitor what she puts on there.

WOW. My 8 & 10 yo boys want their own page and I've been telling them 13. I just read all the other responses, and I WAS going to say I was going to let my boys have a FB page at 13 (per FB rules), but now I'm seriously thinking at "grown and out of the house". I have a stepson who is 23, lives with us, and he posts EVERYTHING...and wonders why he hasn't gotten a "career" job with his 4-year degree, yet.

It is illegal before age 13.

Nothing good can come of allowing a 10 year old to have a FB page. The rule is 13 and I think that's too young too. My 11 year old daughter has never even asked about having a page because she knows how much drama it causes. She hears the terrible language girls and boys use on the bus - you can imagine how nice it would be so see it all in print every day and have your child reading it. A school guidance counselor just told me the other day that "Facebook is the devil - it causes more problems than anyone could imagine" That's reason enough for me to not have my daughter on there.

I would be wanting my dd to be about 15-16 too. minimum!!! I have even had friends of my dd trying to friend me but I ignore them. If they say anything I just explain that I don't agree with kids being on Facebook.

Back in my childhood days the social network place was the city park or out in friends or our back yard....

Honestly, kids are so into the tech stuff now with the cell phones with games and texting, when are they out riding bikes or playing kick the can? It has been proven that to much computer time can cause depression in children and also make them overweight. Limiting the time is a good thing when it comes to things like the computer but with facebook you get to checking the posts all the time and it can be very addicting if you play the games. The games is another thing that is not good, a lot of those apps on there are full of spyware and will slow up your computer big time. Then there are those preditors who befriend your child acting like they are a child also. Even in a small populated state like Wyoming there have been several children who have fallen victim to preditors who they meet through social networks like MySpace and Facebook.... these are kids around 14 or 15 years old. There is bullying going on, posting family business, giving into peer pressure all out there for the world to see. I see a lot of adults who can't handle facebook with dignity, let alone a child. Go look at some teenager pages, they talk bad about their parents, they post pictures that aren't approprate and they post pictures of them drinking and being wild. Their language is nasty. While your 10 year old may not do this, he will be exposed to this as he befriends his friend's older siblings as they all seem to do.

What age is appropriate? Not so much a age as maturity. Mature enough to know you don't post everything, that you know there are real people reading the posts and they aren't always the kids you think they are. If they post something innapropriate it gets around and they get judged on it by friend's parents who read the comments and by other school mates who have ammo to bully. Some adults haven't learned what is approprate to post on there and what is better left off, so expecting a 10 year old to know is pretty big responsibility for him.

This is great opportunity for you discuss that you lay down the guidelines. You are open to discussing things with her and listening to her opinion about issues but you (her parents) make the final decisions.

Bottom line-you decide when you are comfortable with her having a FB page, you have complete access to the account when she does get one(even if she is 16) and you set the privacy controls.

But I don't think a 10 year old needs one personally. But I'm also the mom who doesn't have a video game system for my kids, won't ever have dvd players in the car, etc. lol At 10 she should have plenty of homework, chores and play time to fill her time up rather than sitting on the computer playing FB. Leave that to us adults lol!

30, like me? LoL

I would worry about other things as well. I see kids (even my nieces)posting about boyfriends and posting sexual stuff that I personally wouldn't like to see my kids have online-and they are between 10-13!

I'd say maybe 16, it depends on the child and how much you trust them to make the right decisions, really. And make sure you keep a copy of their password and 'friend' them!

I'm not and never have been a fan of facebook-I got one to get coupons from businesses!

i have a niece as young as 12 who had a myspace and now at the age of 14 she has a facebook, when she was living with us along with her mom who is snowballed by the daughter. my older girls insisted she give the password to them and she comply and my girls would delete anything inappropriate. at 13 she and mom moved out on their own, thus the facebook but get this no computer, she would use her friends cell with internet. they will find a way if not brought up to respect authority.

if u do allow ur child, do the privacy setting and only allow maybe an hour only with you close by.

My daughter is 13 and she is still not allowed although she is the only one in her school without one or so she tells me. I have learned from my friends mistake to allow her 15 year old to have an account. He joined a group "hating" his HS Principle. His account has been hacked 3x's resulting in kids posing as him announcing that he is gay and a bunch of other stuff. I do not think kids are mature enough to understand the possible long term consequences of putting less than flattering information out on FB. Even if you minter the account once something is out there in writing although it can be deleted it is still out there somewhere. Personally, I fail to see any potential good that come out of having a facebook page at even 13. FYI... I love FB, just not for my daughter.

My 10 year old has it. Strict rules, family only!! My husband and I have her password and full say on what she does while on it. mainly to play games and talk to grandparents in another statte as well as cousins from diff parts of the state. She has done well on it and is learning the proper way to act online (IMO) =)

I will consider it at 13 but that's it consider it. I won't even entertain the idea now even though so many of her friends have fb and my nephew (a few months older) did too for awhile. My daughter is 12 1/2.

You are the mom to your daughter. If you feel like she is not mature enough for the responsibility explain it to her.

It will take effort on your part to keep up with the page.

If you feel she is mature enough and you feel you can keep a good eye on it, you could consider it. Just make sure it is on the highest safety settings. Make sure you are the one that also helps her approve her friends and family. Speak with her about language and the responsibility that comes with being on the internet, especially her postings.

My niece was on facebook when she was 11. Her mother looks at every posting and has to approve all "friends" on the list. The only thing my sister has had to delete was when one of the young boys from the class wrote something inappropriate. My sister took that posting down and blocked that boy, until he spoke with my sister about his behaviors.

Personally I feel 15 y/o is old enough to be more mature and responsible about getting a social networking page... tho I know most parents are all gung ho about it.

I think 13 is kind of young. Maybe 15-16. If I had a 13 year old with I MIGHT allow it. If I did I would have FULL access though and would limit it to only people I knew and place time limits. Posts and "friending" would have to be pre-approved.

It's obvious on facebook whose parents don't monitor or are just as immature as their kids because those are the kids posting profanity and sexy photos.

My nephew had shirtless photos up! I told him to take them down and I'd better not ever see that again. I told his parents about that as well as the sexy photos underaged girls were posting on his page-- they asked him about it then did nothing. SMH

kids under age 13 are allowed on if the parent creates the page for them. My kids are way younger (just 3 and a baby), but one of my cousins who is 10 is on there. in this case, it's nice because they live far away and this way, we can keep in touch easier. i think it depends on the child, and whether you think she is mature enough to be on facebook. and also, if you can teach her internet responsibility, like not giving out personal information to strangers, and things like that. a lot of it is just your own instincts, i think. good luck.

13 or up is appropriate. My daughter is 8 and literally all of her friends have a f/b page. Not gonna happen here. I let my daughter onto mine to play farmville and other games, but she is not allowed on the wall. Its not appropriate.

As a parent I like to support letting my kids learn from their own mistakes. I also have a facebook page myself and I have less than 50 friends. I am very selective about who I will "friend" on facebook and in my experience people under 25 or so are not nearly as selective. When I look at the pages of my younger friends it is not uncommon for them to have 500 "friends". She needs to carefully consider who her friends are and not simply approve all people who ask or seek out all classmates as friends. I think that while you could allow a page I would want a reasonable assurance from your daughter that she absolutely knows how to work the privacy settings so that just her friends and not friends of friends or the free world at large knows what she is saying. I also find it annoying and disturbing when people write cryptic and concerning things like "sigh", "worst day ever", "feeling crummy". I think those are the kinds of things that you talk out with a trusted friend and you do not post it on facebook where it simultaneously concerns some and may make you vulnerable to the ill intentions of others. I also have seen posts from friends while I know they are in a class and so I would caution her that if there is computer or smart phone access to her at school to refrain from working on it in class. There is no reason to do that.

I forbid my daughter to have a FB and she showed me that she had one yesterday with 400 friends!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The main reason is I don't want the whole neighborhood knowing where she is at all times. Duh any weirdo knows when they see the posts. Kids add anyone! I had her make a list of friends that she could talk to on her Ipod so I would know who she was in contact with because there's no answering the phone to know anymore. That's all controlled by the child answering the cell phone or on the internet or talking via Ipod. This is where children are gaining more control then before all this was around. We knew who was calling and who they were talking to. We could ground them from the phone. Now they can text the whole town to meet up with them at such and such a place and parents don't even know. Even though she was only allowed the people I thought were appropriate she started this whole FB and added 400 friends. That just blows my mind. She's a great kid but getting sneaky. She had her friends block me so that I didn't see her comments and find out she had an account. They will find a way and with me now knowing about it I can check what's going on. She is 13.