My son is nearly 16 mo old and still primarily eating stage 2 and some stage 3 baby foods. He cut his first two teeth at 6 mo old and now has plenty for chewing food. However, he can't seem to manage textured foods. He eats dry, crunchy snacks, like cheerios, just fine, but anything with noodles causes him to gag and often vomit. I've offered him Gerber Pick-Ups (green beans, peaches, carrots) numerous times, but he always makes a disgusted face and refuses to put any of it in his mouth. He won't self-feed mushy foods and won't let anyone else feed them to him on a utensil. Homecooked food off our plates is always refused as well. He doesn't have any major issues. Developmentally, he is on track with other children, but I'm seeing a significant difference between his eating habits and the habits of other children. I know he should have been eating off the table months ago, but I've tried everything. I considered taking him to see a feeding team at an area children's hospital at one time, but I let me pediatrician's comments about him being healthy talk me out of it. Even at a younger age, he didn't take his bottle well and has never really eaten as much as other children. He is typically between the 10th and 15th percentile for weight, but has been as low as the 3rd percentile. My mother-in-law recently told me that she thought this was my fault for introducing baby food when I did. I started a little baby food at 4 months, as my pediatrician advised. She thought I should have waited. Is this really my fault? Has anyone else experience similar issues, and do you have any advice for me?
I spoke to my son's pediatrician, and he agreed that having my son evaluated now would be a wise decision. He is referring us to a speech therapist who specializes in children with texture/eating issues. Thanks for all the advice and feedback. P.S. I told my mother-in-law about the referral, and I think she believes I am overacting....go figure.
Just keep offering him table food. Does he like grilled cheese. PB and J.
Scrambled eggs. Just some ideas. He is only 16 months. I think those
Stage baby foods are confusing. Soft and mushy with some solid thrown in.
Baby says just swallow, but then gags because solid food is stuck in there.
Just do not make meal times a battle because then you will have food
issues.
I strongly suggest you have him evaluated at the children's hospital. They will look for issues with his palate/throat, as well as consider any sensory issues that may be holding him back. And do not let your MIL blame you! Feeding some baby food at 4 months has NOTHING to do with your current issue. It sounds like you are doing everything right by providing him with a wide variety of foods and textures. But he is developing slow in that area. Go see a professional who specializes in this area. Sometimes palate issues can delay speech as well so better to identify the problem early and get the therapies needed.
No - not your fault. Your MIL is not being nice - AT ALL. And she is wrong too, to boot! You need to stop telling you MIL anything about your child and when she asks why, explain that you don't like being treated the way she is treating you. But I'm sure that's another thread...
Ask your doctor for a referral to an OT who deals with feeding issues. Have her evaluate him to see if there are sensory issues. She can help with that so that he can get used to food without gagging and vomiting.
This is actually really important, Mom. I have a friend whose 19 year old son started out like this and only wanted milk. He fought eating for a very long time, and ended up having a TERRIBLY limited diet. Bread, milk, juice, candy, french fries, select fruits, yogurt, pancakes, soft drinks, and not much else. NO veggies. NO meat. Not even pizza or spagetti. The list above is pretty much it.
He is huge now and has pre-diabetes. She has to give him citracal in his juice and amino acids in his yogurt so he can get what he needs. If she had taken him to an OT when he was little and showing oral defensiveness about food early on, things would have turned out far differently for this child.
I hope you will get some help for your son soon. An evaluation is NOT hard. They may say to give him more time, and that's okay. But don't let it go. You have to advocate for your baby, and you don't have to take rude comments from your mother-in-law while you do that.
Good luck!
Dawn
I agree with Marda, as usual.
Some children are especially sensitive with certain textures, tastes, smells, etc. Foods can be VERY offensive to some children, even downright painful. It's highly unlikely YOU "made him this way".
Absolutely, have him evaluated like you'd planned.
Maybe look up some good articles on sensory issues to share with your MIL.
Enjoy him!
:)
This is NOT your fault. I think you introduced foods in an appropriate manner.
I suggest that he may have sensory issues. The food doesn't feel right in his mouth, and/ or he's unable to put together the idea of chewing the food and the food. I've heard moms on this site suggest an occupational therapist for an evaluation. I would have him evaluated at the children's hospital.
My grandson would stuff his mouth so full that he couldn't chew or swallow at that age. He was diagnosed with a sensory issue and had occupational therapy. He was also speech delayed and the diagnosis was thru the school district.
It's not your fault. My daughter and all NINE of my grandchildren were introduced to one form of solid or another at about the same age. They are all very good eaters.
Your son just likes what he likes. As he gets older, he will be more willing to try new things, especially when he sees others eating it.
Just do the best you can with what he'll eat and supplement with one of the many children's nutritional supplements that are on the market.
Don't listen to your mother-in-law. Some people need to "blame" someone for everything even if no blame is warranted.
OMG, NO! Do NOT let your MIL make you feel bad for this. Many, many Moms start their child on baby food/cereal at 4 months. 4-6 months is the recommended age to begin solids.
It just sounds like your child is a picky eater. You'll have to manage that for years to come, probably, but no, it is NOT your fault.
Keep offering him the foods that he needs. He won't starve himself, and he will grow out of it.
I would have him evaluated I think, just to make sure things are good and to help him get on track with the foods.
Then I'd have a nice long chat with hubby if he allowed his mother to say that to you with no consequences.
If your son doesn't eat what you give him, what will happen? Do you fear he will starve? Do you offer him his preferred food after he refuses what you're trying to give him? Is this a case of...he refuses & you give in?
By honestly answering these questions, you will have a starting point as to how to proceed. My vote would be to make sure there aren't any developmental/sensory issues....& then begin to stand firm on what he is given to eat. We all have favs when it comes to food & kids are the same.
But as I used to tell my sons, "I was not put on this Earth to short-order cook for you. Dinner is served". :)
If your son refuses his food, wrap it up & reserve it at the next mealtime. Eventually, he'll learn to accept what you're offering! This method is not cruel, not heartless....& will serve him well in the years to come.
& one more thought: at age 16 months, he is quite capable of helping you in the kitchen! From matching coupons to the item in the store.... to putting the groceries away....to the actual food prep, kids can learn to embrace mealtime through allowing them the freedom to explore the Food World! Peace....
My daughter had trouble with solid foods until about 13 months old or so. She would gag on most foods. Giving them baby food at 4 months doesn't cause this. Keep offering him solid foods that dissolve in his mouth. He will eventually start to chew better. I wouldn’t worry too much as long as he is eating. Make sure any noodles are cut up very finely so they will slide down his throat.
My wife had a babyfood grinder (hand crank) and she fed our kids off her plate. The ones that were picky, we fed them what we ate and kept trying until they ate what we ate. We ended up with no picky eaters. Some of my kids are like that and they feed their children what they (parents) eat. Some of them only feed their children what they want to eat.
The children that are fed only what they want to eat are chilren that will only eat chicken nuggets and french fries or tater tots. Seldom a fruit and no vegetables or salad. These spoiled children pout and cry and throw their temper tantrums to get their way. They will even sweep their plate with food they don't like off onto the floor. The moms have gone to cooking two or three meals for BLD so everyone is happy instead of insisting that everyone eats the same and only cooking one meal.
I have seen other parents let the kids be the parent and make the parent be the short order cook. If you let your 18 month old get away with that now, he will make your life miserable when he is a teenager, UNLESS you like making a separate meal for each person at the table.
Good luck to you and yours.
My son was the same way at this age. He has enormous tonsils which I now know are contributing to his dislike of foods of certain textures. Even now, at 5 years old, most meat is out of the question. He eats no beef or chicken and very little pork. He loves the taste of bacon, but gags almost every time he eats it due to the food brushing his tonsils.
The pediatrician said his tonsils will shrink as he ages, and not to worry about it. He'll eventually outgrow it.
Totally not your fault. First off, your son is still very young. This is completely normal! My son is 4 and he still doesn't eat most of the food we eat. And I am a foodie...trust me, I am all about eating anything and trying new things. People love to blame moms on this one. "He wont starve!" "He'll eat when he's hungry!". Not true for every child. In my son's case he also refused bottles and had food texture issues. It was part of his oral sensory issues. Just keep offering, do not punish him by withholding food (he can't afford to lose weight) and prepare the food he likes in fattening way with butter and coconut oil. In the next year you should see big changes developmentally. Just watch and make sure he stays on track.
I agree with MIL to a degree. Most docs will tell mom's to stay away from solids of any kind until at least 6 months and then just the powder cereal mixed with formula to make a runny broth. I don't see any issues that would effect now though.
Baby food is only to help a child learn to chew and swallow. It has no nutritional value. The BABY FOOD company told me this themselves. They said a baby gets 100% of their nutrition from the formula or breastmilk. Therefore when they start feeding them solids it is only to teach a baby to chew and swallow and to introduce flavors. NOT FOR NUTRITION. Formula is for that. So baby food is flavored goo with a few vitamins thrown in, nothing nutritional about it. If you want your child to get good nutrition and gain weight stop feeding him flavored goo.
Stop feeding this child any purchased baby food and start using your own food from the table and here is how I did this effectively.
I bought a Pampered Chef Food Chopper when the kids were little and still use it. I put a small amount of the food on the cutting board then whacked the heck out of it with the food chopper, about 15 times if I remember right. This made small, tiny, pieces that could be swallowed without chewing if needed.
Then as they got more used to the foods I would only chop it 10 times and then 5 later on. It made things like HB Helper small enough and not slick enough to slide down the throat without gagging them.
My favorite books when the kids were smaller were, and still are actually:
http://www.amazon.com/Complete-Idiots-Guide-Feeding-Toddl...
http://www.amazon.com/Baby-Toddler-Meals-For-Dummies/dp/0...
No-but keep trying different things-including having an evaluation at your local Children's hospital-use whole milk and high fat foods-not sugar-fat-try chopping his food and use a bit of broth to make it moist. Keep trying-you'll find something he likes-will he eat fruit, yogurt, potatoes-they're pretty good for packing on the calories!
Don't beat yourself up. You did what you thought was right. I bet the older he gets the more he will be open to trying new foods. Does he go to a daycare or see other kids his age eat "big kid food"? This may help if he sees other kids. Baby food still has great vitamins & nutrients for the kids. My daughter hated store bought baby food so I ended up making hers. She was also like your son & a bit finicky when it came to strange textured foods. She has came around, (shes 4 now) and eats what we do. Good luck to you! Its tough
first off your mil is a meany! i hope your husband backs you up and tells her its not right to blame you and doesnt side with his mom. I mean even if she truly believes that what is blaming you going to do? you cant go back in time.
BTW most people introduce foods then. i waited until 6 months to start cereal....and got lucky and my daughter eats everything. my brother did the same, his daughter is picky.
I agree with others to get him evaluated.
I would also suggest having him evaluated.... it may be a sensory issue, (Sensory Processing Disorder), or it may be a neuromuscular issue.... it may be something as simple as a tongue-tie, which isn't allowing him to move food around in is mouth easily to swallow it.
This has nothing to do with when you started baby food, so rest your mind.... He appears to have always had feeding issues, whether it be the bottle or food.
He may need Occupational therapy to help with the feeding issues.....
My neice was the same way! sye gagged on almost everything. I couldn't tell if it was from my sister babying her, or if she was just super sensitive to texture and size. I would talk to the doc about it, they have peobably dealth with it before and can guide you in the right direction!
Eh... he's only 16 months. There's really no "should have been eating table food since ____ months" yet. He's taking food at his own pace, and he's healthy. It's when your child falls off the chart completely that there's a problem. And he IS eating... he's eating Stage 2. He may just have a harder time with certain textures right now, and that's fine. You have to let him work it out on his own. Just keep offering him different things in addition to the foods you know that he will eat.
Don't stress about it and don't make food a battle, or else it WILL cause real feeding issues.
My middle daughter actually did have feeding issues from birth and still does, and she's 9 years old. She's had issues with every "stage" of feeding. In our case it's related to Sensory Integration Disorder (as it relates to her Autism Spectrum Disorder), which often leads to some disordered eating. She has, and always has had, a very restricted diet due to some allergies and intolerances, but much of her diet is self-restricted. She has always been a skinny mini and on the low end of the charts but she's on the charts. She's healthy. She's happy. She's growing.
We have more issues when I try to force her to eat. Stage 3 foods were a nightmare. Honestly, though, they're pretty disgusting. We simply accommodated her "style" of eating even before we knew she had Autism but knew she was having some sensory problems.
You know what, though? It's possible that your son is having some tactile sensory issues or something else is going on. You're worried, so why not follow through with this? Ask your doctor to refer you to a Pediatric Gastroenterologist, who can run some tests AND can hook you up with a Pediatric Nutritionist. If nothing else, those two specialists can help you figure out what's going on and/or alleviate your fears. If your pediatrician isn't alleviating your fears then you need to do something yourself. So that's my suggestion. Pediatric Gastroenterologist and Pediatric Nutritionist.
sounds like a sensory issure talk to your childs dr or find a dr who will listen!!
Oh I feel for you! You must be worried about him getting enough to eat. I agree with the others about getting an evaluation. In the meantime, maybe you could try making your own baby food from your table to get him used to the flavors? Table food has stronger, richer flavors than baby food. I did this with my second child and was surprised at how easy it was and how little time it took. If you work, you could just use a chopper or small food processor at dinnertime to cut up whatever you're eating quickly. I think some parents make the mistake of starting table food too late, actually. But he may have some issues regardless. I would think starting baby food early has nothing to do with it!
Edit: I meant to include the website I used for making baby food: http://wholesomebabyfood.momtastic.com/
I know you got a lot of responses already so I may repeat. I think you should definitely have him evaluated and seen by an occupational therapist. My son is 2 1/2 and about a year ago he used to have issues with certain foods. We had him evaluated and it was thought that maybe he had some sensory processing issues. An occupational therapist came to our house once a week to work with him. He is doing great now and has no issues with food anymore. Just ignore your MIL, you did not cause your sons issues with food!
Although I think it absolutely crazy that your Ped. suggested food at 4 months...I seriously doubt that's why you are having those problems. The early feeding could pose very minor problems later but, rest assured not this problem. Just my commen sense, that that would make no sense ;)
I say ont stress out about it so much. He will catch up.
no its not your fault. Some kids especially young ones are super picky to food textures. I would start off letting him sample my plate cut things up and let him pick at it or put some little things on his plate directly from your plate. He is only 16 months I wouldnt be concerned unless he was 2 or older.
some kids just have texture issues. offer other things- eggs, diced fruit, toast. hes fine and just doesnt like the texture.
