Hi all,
Okay, so, my hubby wanted to have a third child shortly after the birth of our second. At the time, I knew I wanted another and just couldn't go through the pregnancy right then. Then, about a year after, he kept hinting around that he wanted a third and I still said yes. I just wanted to wait. Now, two and a half years have passed. I tried bringing up the topic a few times and he wasn't receptive at all. He says now that two is enough. Although, at times, he'll get sentimental and cry when he thinks about the boys in their infancy. How do I convince my husband that I'm ready for another child and that I really still want one? It's frustrating to think that he only wants the two at this point, but I don't want to push him into anything he really isn't excited about either.
Thanks...
I take it he has moved back in since your split at the end of December?
I would give it some time, six months is not very long. Make sure the marriage is on solid ground BEFORE bringing another child into the family. Just my opinion obviously!
I'm thinking that he's not receptive right now because your marriage hasn't been stable... and it's not responsible or appropriate to get pregnant while in a situation like that intentionally. If your hope is to "fix" your marriage with a baby, it will magnify or cover up your problems instead. And it won't be fair to a new baby nor to the children that you already have.
It sounds as if you guys have a history of having trouble communicating. I would strongly suggest marriage counseling and therapy. It's not about telling each other what's wrong and how to fix the other or one person... it's about learning how to communicate and learning skills together to work on the relationship.
Not sure if I would have another child while your marriage is not in the best place.
Based on your past posts, I wouldn't jump into a baby now either.
Is your husband now in recovery? If not, DEFINITELY no 3rd baby!
If so, his tears over the infancy might be tears of regret and he may feel like he needs to concentrate on being the best dad he can be to the two he already has and making amends.
You told him you were "ready", he's not.
Give it time.
There are worse things than having a few year gap between kids, right?
Just tell him how you feel and tell him to think about it while you hand him a scrapbook of newborn pics of your kids. :)
It depends on what his reasons are and if they can be countered with solutions (money, time, space in the house etc)
