Anything Rude Here?

Totally depends on tone of voice... But just wording? Wording is fine.

Compliment
Thanks + Sharing
Admission that she cannot afford them = polite refusal

oooh dear!!! Lady A reminds me of a post the other day that got pulled about in-laws!!!

While I can laugh about it. And I like the compliment. However, stating I like my money in the bank is rude. Oh well. press on!!!

I would still laugh about it...she's missing out on looking good because she prefers her money in the bank!!!

I don't think it's rude I think it's funny, if I was Lady B I would laugh and agree that I should keep more of my money in the bank too!

Well, my first thought was, "Yes, very rude" because I misread the first comment to be: "I like your boobs." Totally different context :)

Lady A just sounds kind of kooky. Not rude, just weird. Lady B could have just said "thanks" and not added the other stuff... and then Lady A would not have added her second remark.

Edit after your SWH.

They know each other well. Obviously not "friends" tho, more like competitors. Lady A likes the boots, envies the boots, but wont allow her self to be frivolous for the sake of vanity, so she tries to remove the joy of the boot owner by dissing her... so I guess now it's kinda rude.

Just verbatim, without knowing the tone of voice, I'd say it's just an 'odd' exchange. I'm sure a "that's nice, thanks" from Lady A would have sufficed. Or "no thanks--just admiring them from afar, they really look great on you".

There's something to be said for the days of manners and charm school, ha ha. :) We seem to have lost the ability to be gracious these days.

How well did these 2 know each other? If not at all, the conversation should have gone as follows:

A - I like your boots
B - Thank you.

B should have stopped there (sort of arrogant that of course you like them enough to buy them, and A should not have responded with a slap.

If they knew each other, B COULD have said, "Thank you! I got them on line and I love them. Then the ball is in B's court to ask the source, or to say, "well, they go great with that outfit" and move on.

So in my opinion, both were a little over the top.

The first sentence, "I like your boots." is an innocuous statement of admiration.

The second sentence, "Thanks! I got a really good deal on them, I can send you the website." happily agrees with the first statement but then assumes that just because something is admired, it must then also be obtained. While not outright rude, you do know what they say about assuming? Right?

The third sentence, "Oh no, thats ok, I like my money in the bank." acknowledged the assumption rather than the gratitude for the compliment, letting the speaker of sentence two know that admiration does not always lead to a purchase. This comment, while not rude in and of itself, is conveying to the speaker of sentence two that she is a saver, not a spender.

The truly polite thing to do would have been to accept the offer of the location website with a smile, then ignored it, leaving lady B none the wiser. However, if lady A and lady B are good friends, and/or family, it's easier to be more candid about one's feelings. Lady A apparently felt comfortable enough with lady B to let her know that though she admired Lady A's lovely boots, she may not have been able to afford them, no matter how great a deal they may have been and had no interest in pursuing a purchase.

Lady b was not suggesting a might want to get a pair. She is excited about a good deal that she got and wanted to share with her friend..nothing more. I would have done the same thing. Lady b only needed to respond with a "that's great" or something similar.

It's hard to tell just with this info. If they are friends it could be a joke between them if they are strangers it sounds a little rude... or at least not very thoughtful. Sometimes people are preoccupied with their own stuff and don't realize how they sound. I try to give the benefit of the doubt...

goofy, but not rude.She likes to admire things but not buy them. Kinda funny actually :)

I would only think it were rude if there were a history of comments made about how lady a thought b spent her money. But if this is just a random conversation, then not rude.

It depends on whether the ladies are friends. It's sounds as if there's a private joke here. At least, I hope so.

I guess Lady A is making an assumption about how much they cost (even with the 'good deal' Lady B got on them) and then going on to say she would not spend the money (or go into debt) to buy the boots.
It might be considered rude if Lady B took it as a comment about her spending habits.
But then again, if this is just filler chit chat, I might not care that much about what ever Lady A says and I'd either ignore it or say "Pinch that penny till it bleeds, Baby!" and she can either ignore it or feel huffy if she thinks I called her cheap as oppose to calling her frugal (could go either way).
Communication can be a complex thing!
For the most part, I choose not to be offended by rude people because they are just not worth the energy expended on reacting to them.
I choose to reject drama and it works well for me.

Lady B should have stopped at Thank You. But I have gone over board myself when someone compliments me, so I've been there, done that and I understand the response.

Lady A is rendering a judgement. She should have stopped at "No Thanks." However, I could see saying this to someone I knew very, very well and was joking, meaning I don't like the boots that much that I would spend my money on them.

Can you give us the context in which this conversation occurred?

Strangers? BFFS? Tone?

Personally, I don't think anyone was rude. The conversation seems a little odd, though.

ETA - now that you clarified, I can see it being said in a joking tone, so I definitely don't think it's rude.

To me, it sounds like a VERY untactful way of Lady A saying she thinks the boots cost way too much money.

So, yes, kind of rude but I guess it's a little better than Lady A saying "No, that's ok; I don't like them THAT much!"

I would have just said, "sure, that'd be great!" as a response for the website info and left it at that. I don't think she needed to be rude.

There have been many times when my nieces are wearing new expensive boots (that I know they really can't afford) or some other article of clothing and sure, I could have said something to that effect but I chose to keep my mouth shut. Why hurt someone's feelings. Plus, it's really none of my busines.

So, did Lady B respond in any way?????

Hard to say without knowing personalities of both. However, if Lady A simply wanted to save her money, she could have just said something like, "Oh, that's ok, I'm watching what I spend right now, but I do really like them." Saying she likes her money in the bank implies that Lady B is a spender, which may not be necessarily true. But yes, I think it did come off as kind of rude. I would have taken my new boots and kicked her in the...lol

I don't know about rude, but it was a wierd thing to say and totally unnecessary. Even if she wasn't going to buy the boots, she had complimented them and she could have just listened to Lady B's info and simply not used it. That's what I'd have done. I compliment people's Coach purses all the time but I'd never be able to afford one myself, but I don't say that while telling them that their bag is gorgeous.

It would be incredibly rude if they didn't know each other well. IF they were used to bantering back and forth and think it's funny, then it's not rude. IF it shocked the lady with the boots, then the remark was rude.

An alternative to "I like my money in the bank" would have been "You have great taste in boots, but I'm sure I can't afford them."

Dawn

Worded like that? Yeah, I think it is rude.

I don't see anything rude anywhere in there. Lady A is complimenting someone's boots, says she likes them. Lady B is amped about the deal she got and wants to share. Lady A is saying she's not willing or ABLE to spend the money right now. Even if it's a good deal.
If I were Lady A, I would NOT think "B" was pushing anything on me. If I were Lady B, I would NOT think A was being rude, but saying that for whatever reason, she's not able to go buy stuff.
And her not even wanting the website would suggest to me that she's making a concerted effort to be disciplined in her spending, probably a new thing. I used to be a drunk....and I stayed far, far away from all clubs for years (still steer clear of them but that's because I found a life away from them, not because I'm "scared")...but when I was making an effort to change my habits, I didn't want to sniff around the new club, ya know? That's how I'd take that conversation. And me, I do like my money in the bank.....especially when I'm working on a specific project or goal (like getting out of debt, or working on that emergency fund every Tom, Dick, and Harry says we need, or saving money for a new car, or a charitable project, etc). I wouldn't think she meant anything by it. If she didn't like the boots, she wouldn't have mentioned the boots, right?

I'd think rude but not say anything. If the lady really got a good deal I think she could say something like "Thanks! I paid $20 for them, want the web address?".

It's hard to tell, but some people just like to complain about money all the time. Feel they have to mention they don't have enough money or have to watch their budget instead of just being quiet. I think those people are struggling and just can't think of anything else. They aren't necessarily broke but they still don't have as much as they feel they need to be able to spend without worry. So it's more about their issues. Maybe a little rude, but really more about their own insecurities.

I find it odd that Lady B said anything more than, "Thanks." I'm sure she meant well, but I usually assume that a comment like, "I like your boots ... " is really part compliment and part friendly chit chat. Sometimes, even among close friends, people run out of things to say.

Not rude. If I were Lady B, I would have laughed.

Actually, both sound kind of rude. When someone compliments you, it's odd to replay "I got a good deal, and I'll send you the website" unless they're really good friends. That's not really something you'd say to a stranger or acquaintance. And, in that case, if they are good friends, then the response might not be quite so rude, as she might know her friend's definition of a deal and spending habits. If they are strangers, then both had kind of rude responses.

Only rude, if Lady B is the most sensitive person on the planet.

I agree--goofy more than rude.

Lady A didn't ask where Lady B bought them or how much they were.....

I don't think it is rude. She wants to save her money... right? I could see myself saying that and not meaning to be rude. I just simply don't spend money on myself. Additionally, that money in MY bank goes to bills anyways, unfortunately:)

Well, if I was lady B, I would not think lady A was being rude.

Not rude in the least. It's a cute way of saying that Lady B likes the boots but doesn't intend to buy them for herself because she's on a tight budget or can't afford to spend any money right now.

Tough to say. So much of this depends on body language.

I am clumsy with my words and would definitely say something like Lady A without meaning offense or further implication. Some people have a thing for heals. I have a thing for boots. I can't afford most of the boots that I love (I save up and get a new pair every few years), but it doesn't stop me from looking and commenting. If someone offered to give me information and I wasn't in the market to purchase, I'd appreciate the offer, fall over my words, and say something that didn't really explain that in fact, I was just looking. I wouldn't want to put someone through the trouble of giving me information that I'd never be able to use.

I can also see this being said with a rude or condescending tone, implying that the other party is living above her means or should be saving money instead of buying boots.