Anyone Else Regret Doing Santa?

I wouldn't worry to much. She's still young and each Christmas remind her what the real meaning is. She will carry this through her childhood. Its fun for them and you..this is what I did with my children as I miss those days of being santa since my children are grown. Just enjoy them being little because time will pass much to quickly!

She's 5, she's going to be all about presents.
At 5 they don't really get the true meanings of Christmas and Easter.
Read her the true story on christmas eve, not "twas the night before christmas" . She will get it. But keep up Santa , it's so much fun and so magical for them. I have an almost 9 yr old that still believes. She knows the true christmas story but Santa is still a big part of it.

WHAT!!!!!!!!!!! THERE IS NO SANTA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ooohhh man!!! ;)
i think whatever you decide to do will be just fine. we all found out there was no santa and we are all ok. also, i love love love the 3 gift idea!!

She's 5 and Santa is a cool and exciting thing when you are 5. Your concern is valid given that you want them to have a Christian upbringing and believe the Christian meaning of Christmas. But again she's 5. She won't learn it on her own so it's up to you to teach her.

So what do you need to do? Start now discussing the meaning of Christmas as you see it. You can also find books/stories about Santa and where he came from/means. I don't think it's any reason to bag Santa.

My thought is our kids have their whole lives to deal with reality so why not let them enjoy these times while they can!

Your child is 5. Do you really expect a 5 yr old child to comprehend the meaning of Christmas and Easter?

It is our job as parents to teach this but there is nothing wrong in my opinion with Santa and Easter bunny. You balance it out with your teaching.

Yes, they do associate it with presents at 5 yrs old. It does NOT mean that is all she'll learn about it. At 5 I would hope she learns a lot more as she grows up and understands meanings behind it.

I also don't think it is a lie to have Santa, Eater Bunny, Tooth Fairy. Of course the children grow up to know what it is all about but I have yet to see 1 child hate their parents for having Santa, Easter Bunny, etc. If anything, they would wonder what they are missing because the majority of children do participate and get a balanced view of what it is all about.

I do think you are over thinking a bit. That said, you have do do what is right for your family.

I think you are over thinking this. Of course, she is going to focus on the presents - she is 5. I would think none of us really understood the true meaning of anything until we were older and more mature. I would also remind you that most adults, if any, are not scarred b/c there is no Santa and we were told a 'lie'. It is just one those those coming of age realizations.

They grow up so fast, are you really ready to burst that bubble so young?

Mine are 10 & 13 and we all still act like Santa is coming. I love the look on my boys faces when they see what Santa brought them. To this day I still get Santa gifts at my parent's house. It's more of a tradition than a reality of whether Santa is real or not. I never let my parents know that I knew there wasn't a Santa b/c I didn't want to stop getting gifts from him. My oldest has taken on the same attitude. My youngest does question though, when he does ask I will tell him of course there is a Santa or that there was one. B/c Santa couldn't live forever and he wished he could continue to bring gifts on Christmas morning, he passed the tradition on to the parents, for us to be Santa in his absence. I will add, what a true gift it was and an honor to carry on the tradition.

As parents we lie about many things, I'm not quite sure why this topic is so touchy. What do we lie about...sex, alcohol, speeding to name just a few. Sex is great and very enjoyable but do we tell the kids that? No, we focus on the dangers and consequences instead of the enjoyment. Alcohol, those that drink love the little buzz they get, but do we tell our kids that? No, we tell them of the dangers and consequences instead of the enjoyment. Speeding, how many go 5-10 miles over the speed limit? We just make excuses for that lie. There are many lies we tell to protect or to bring surprise. If I have a choice to tell a lie to my kid, this is one I have no problem with telling.

We’re a Christian family. No I don’t regret doing Santa. When my daughter was 10 y/o she was opening one of her presents. She looked at the tag on the gift and said “Mommy Santa’s handwriting looks just like yours!” I couldn’t help but smile so big and she gave me that squinty eye look, came and whispered in my ear and said “Mommy (all suspicious) are YOU Santa??” I didn’t want to lie and knowing so many of her friends already knew the truth I told her yes that I was Santa. She got a huge smile on her face and said “I KNEW IT!!!!” All proud of herself that she solved this mystery and it was all good. Every Christmas we laugh about that memory. My daughter understand the true meaning of Christmas =-)

My DS is 5 y/o and I’m positive we will get just as great of a memory from when he discovers Mommy & Daddy are Santa!

I have 3 kids ages 9, 8 and 6. I told them about Santa and my oldest who will be 10 in Dec knows there is no Santa and she is fine. I don't regret telling them about Santa at all. My oldest knows it is all in fun and she enjoys shopping as Santa for her sisters!

Teach your daughter about the meaning of Christmas and Easter, I don't think you trade 1 for the other.

At 5 years old I don't think she *can* grasp the Christian meanings of Christmas and Easter. So yeah, it's about the presents.

My feeling about Santa is that it's all about innocence, and children have so LITTLE time to be innocent nowadays how can letting her believe in Santa hurt? Another year or 2 in school and the 'Santa myth' will be revealed. Do you really want to be the one to break it to her now?

Julie B. said it perfectly. That is exactly how Santa was represented to us, and yes, we are/were Christian families.

No...and here's why. We remind our kids WHY we celebrate Christmas. We also don't over-do the Santa thing. My parents lied to me repeatedly and in 5th grade, I still believed in Santa. I have never lied to my kids. My son asked me about the tooth fairy and I told him straight up that she is not real, but it can be a fun fantasy....and that he can't tell other kids. We still do the tooth fairy thing, but he knows...and loves it. This year, I have a feeling, he's gonna ask about Santa, but I'm pretty sure he already knows.

We do a few small "Santa presents" that are sitting out and then the rest are from family. My husband and I don't give the kids any other presents than what Santa gives. Last year our daughter got Converse, jump rope and bath toy. Our other two got similar toys and they were happy as anything. My parents use to give us TONS of things, so I'm not really inot over-doing the present thing.

Growing up, we went to church every Sunday, and went to private school, so we got the reason for the season. Just keep reminding her and at some point, she'll get it. We also donate new toys to local organizations, so the kids also understand how good it feel to GIVE.

Personnally, I don't think your children are old enough to understand these holidays in the way you want them to--especially Easter! Yikes, I can't imagine trying to tell a 4 yo about the condemnation, crucifixion, death... Too violent and scary for a small child, in my opinion.... And then the resurrection! The finality of death is hard enough for a child to grasp and accept, and to introduce the concept of the resurrection would just confuse them more.

My vote is to let your children enjoy the childhood 'magic of Christmas' for as long as possible. And Easter to boot! Once they find out the truth, no tooth fairy is possible either.

We won't be doing Santa. My husband feels very strongly about this and I do as well. When he was small, his parents did the whole Santa thing for a little while. Once he found out it was a fake, he was very hurt. Therefore, they didn't do Santa anymore with the next 2. But all 3 boys knew to keep it to themselves. My sister and I did Santa for a good while as kids. I'm not sure when she found out, but I remember well when I did. Mom mentioned where one of my 'Santa gifts' came from one day not realizing I remembered 'who' gave it to me. I remember well, that I felt hurt by this. Although I got over it, it did still hurt me as a child. But I was also your very sensitive child (much like my baby girl is now) and reacted to situations differently than most... still do.
A little background... He came from a home of regular church-goers... I didn't.
I like the idea of explaining it for the sake of imagination and if the child choses to play, then play along. Kind of like tea parties and make believe friends.
Also, you could have your children donate their no longer used toys to other children in need. This is a season for giving, for Christ gave everything for us.
Many churches have special messages and plays just before Christmas. This will also help to re-affirm the true meaning of Christmas. :)
On top of all this, many parents go into debt getting tons of presents for their little ones and how many of those presents are used after that first day or two? Yet another reason to not over extend yourself if it is unnecessary.
I overthink and over analyze things too, so I feel you there. :)

I don't practice any religion but I want my son to know his presents come from mommy and daddy, because we work very hard to make sure he has christmas presents

I am trying to do this slowly for my 2.5 yo, and just talk about the spirit of Christmas. My husband is also a believer in the big gifts from us, and small ones from Santa which suits me just fine.

How about reading about St. Nick with her, and let her know that that is where the idea of Santa Claus comes from? Let her know that everyone has different beliefs, that some people believe it is an actual person, and some celebrate in his name? Don't know if this really helps, but I would be interested in how it turns out, because I see myself there in a couple years, if not sooner.

I went through the same stuff with my kids. I come from a Christian worldview as well and the orgy of presents and Santa really annoys me. That being said, my kids at 11 & 14 still like Christmas best because of the presents - that's pretty natural at an age when kids are kids and self-centered. They do eventually begin to think about giving to other - there are glimmers of it now that I see in my kids.

We talked about Santa but didn't go overboard - I was always uncomfortable assigning santa with omniscience - knowing about your good and bad behavior... So I would put a slant on it that we parents report our kids behavior to Santa. As it relates to the questions and doubting, when my then 5 yr old asked why there were so many santas around I turned it back to her - "why do you think there are?" and she answered it for herself "I think they're guys who dress up as Santa to help him out". When my kids began to ask if there's really a Santa I explained the history of Santa - how in various parts of the world when it was time to celebrate the birth of the savior of the world people wanted to give each other a small gift - but some families were so poor that others would deliver gifts to these familys in an anonymous way. One of the earliest people to do so was a guy named Nick who was pretty godly since they called him a saint. This is all losely accurate. It will help them understand the true meaning and spirit of giving to other in the name of Christ. But I did allow them to "believe" longer than I was really comfortable with but they seemed to want to. When I did confirm their suspiscions I was careful to tell them that there are things that are childhood things like the toothfairy, the Easter bunny, etc. But there are real things that we can't see like God, angels, etc. I explain it like wind - we cna't see the wind but we can see it's effect in our lives.

As for teaching them the real meaning of Christmas - do your kids go to a sunday school or religion class that maybe has a Christmas pagenat or program? My church begins sunday school at 2 1/2 so the little ones are actually the sheep & angels in the nativity finale of the sunday school pageant - so they are involved in the real meaning of Christmas as far back as they can recall. Make sure you have a creche / nativity set in your home decoration - let them help you set it up - even consider getting them their own child's set - they have cute wooden sets, even stuffed ones for kids - let them play out the scene.

Good luck Mama!

Well we decided at the beginning to tell our boys that Santa is pretend for this very reason. First of all I didn't want to lie to my boys about an unseen friendly fellow that comes into our house once a year bearing gifts because he was so good all year. How manipulating! And then tell him about a unseen God that loves and cares for us. I thought it would be confusing and set us up for being lairs. Truth is something that we really stress around here :)
We told them that some children believe in Santa and that was ok and to let their parents be the ones to tell them the truth about it.
With that said we still do Santa, a pretend Santa and they are happy with that. They are 6 and my youngest just turned 4.
We do an advent calendar every year starting on Dec 1st and a children Christmas devotional as well. We do try and keep it very Christ centered but they still get excited about gifts, who wouldn't right? lol
For me, it's really more about lying to them and the whole "better be good or Santa won't bring you anything" that really grosses me out about Santa.
Also sharing the wonderful story about the real Santa (Saint Nickolas) that lived long ago is a good way of bringing truth into Christmas.
It's like most Holidays, the world takes on it's own slant of something that is Christ centered and makes it very "worldly".
Teach your children the truth and let them enjoy being a child both in a balance. It doesn't have to be all or nothing ")
Best Regards,
C.

I am getting a little fed up covering for Santa...lol My 4 year old is a very smart kid and a thinker. He questioned me last year about Santa- told me that "deer" don't fly "That's just silly". He saw some deer on TV and said- "Look mommie- those don't fly. I TOLD you!" This year, he has been suggesting that Santa should just mail presents to all the kids instead of flying around. Sheesh...This is getting very tiring!
Recently he and my mother's church were doing shoe boxes for underprivileged kids for Christmas. She explained to him that some children get nothing for Christmas. Naturally, he came home with a million questions. He wanted to know why Santa doesn't visit those children. "Are all poor kids naughty?" "Why doesn't Santa like poor kids?" "If he visits all the children in the world, why not these kids?" I told him to ask his grandmother since she was fixing up the boxes...lol
I am just waiting for the big question at which point I might have to just tell him. If that makes me a party pooper, oh well. But I hope I can fend him off for a couple more years, at least until he is old enough not to spoil it for other children.

We also are a Christian family and no I do not regret doing Santa with my kids. That would be regretting adding fun and joy to their lives. My older daughter had it figured out at 5 and we turned it into a fun pretend thing at the time. And when her little sister came along, she didn't spill the beans to her but rather helped us with things like putting out cookies and carrots and making "Santa footprints" near the fireplace.

If your daughter is questioning it, you could talk to her about how it's a fun tradition and that she can now help you with little sister and create the fun for her.

My kids knew the meaning of Christmas, but who doesn't like to get presents??!! Giving and getting presents is a way we show love to each other. Nothing wrong with that in my opinion.

As kids, when we were growing up, Santa brought one present. As each kid grew old enough to know the truth, my mom said as long as we kept up the ruse for the younger kids then we would still get one Santa gift.

The truth is, at 5 years old, you can't expect her to really 'get' the religion behind Christmas yet. Of course she is all about the presents.

Here at our house, we do three gifts per kid to represent the 3 wise men and one Santa gift and hopefully as they grow able they will understand and appreciate the meaning behind it. But for now, they're just kids and want what they want.

I guess to answer your question, NO...I do not (yet) regret doing Santa.

In answer to your question, NO, NEVER, NOT FOR A MINUTE!!!!!!!!

I never did the Santa thing with my four children. Too me, a lie is a lie anyway you look at it. Research the real story behind the Santa image and maybe you can incorporate that into your Christmas traditions.

I love doing Santa with my kids but I've also explained to them how we can all be Santas or Santa's helpers. We talk about different ways that we can help people, not only through the holiday season, but also throughout the year. We have had a couple years when a Santa left presents at our door for our children- it was awesome to know that there are people out there who care like that.
We also do the Christian Christmas too. My sister made a book for us a while back that has a Christmas story, Scripture and religious Christmas song for each day of December until the 24th. That has become one of our favorite traditions where we read the story and scripture and sing the song. I think it has also helped teach them that Christmas is more than Santa and reindeer(although that is fun)- that it is also the time that we celebrate the birth of Christ.
Easter on the other hand is different. I don't like the whole Easter bunny thing- I don't buy my kids gifts for Easter at all. We do an Easter egg hunt the day before, but we go to church on Easter to remember why Christ was born for us and why he died. I am not against celebrating Easter, I just think it has gotten too commercialized and it bothers me. I guess it just seems easier to celebrate both sides of Christmas rather then both sides of Easter.
~C.

I'm glad you asked this question bc my son (6) is also all about the presents, which is not the way we want to raise him. We are not Christian but we still celebrate the season and the importance of family and giving to others. We try to talk to him alot about how this time of year is about the spirit of giving to others and we take him to do volunteer work and to do charity donations. Last year when he was 5 he also questioned Santa saying that was not possible! We talked about St. Nicholas. I decided Santa is such a fun thing for kids (and he has a little sister) so I wanted him to believe a little longer. There is a website where Santa will send a personalized video email to your child. We did this (it's very charming) and we went and rode the "polar express" train and he suddenly was a very excited total believer in Santa again! Maybe in a year or two he will no longer believe, and that is ok!

I'm Christian too, but I think there's too much phobia about the Santa thing. As I see it they only have a few years of their lives where they believe in Santa. And those years watching them get excited about even stuff like Santa are precious years. Having imaginations and fantasies is not a bad thing. There's plenty of time to tell them otherwise, but too early takes away a lot of the fun and excitement they experience and also share with their friends. You can also try to combine the sacred with the fantasy. Have fun with Santa, but continue to instill your convictions as well. My kids had both. I haven't been 'condemned' for LYING to them about Santa. I never made my folks feel guilty either for letting me believe in Santa. Again, it's such a short time of life.

We're not doing Santa, but I'll tell my child who he really is - the historical figure. I like that story better because it's about giving to needy people. We don't want to lie for "fun". Pretending is fun, but the thing with Santa and that stuff is you "have" to lie eventually. It may not bother some kids, but others will feel betrayed and we don't want to take that chance.

I would continue with Santa...your daughter is still young so she is going to like presents a lot but that doesn't mean she will continue to be like that..I say keep with it

Here are some interesting Santa polls..check it out:

http://www.theskinnyscoop.com/search/santa?utm_campaign=t...

It's kind of hard to avoid the Santa path... it's everywhere! I haven't read your other posts, so forgive me if I restate what others have suggested.

You could start by attending church during Advent. Find a local church of your denomination that does a "family service" on Sunday. During the Advent season, the whole Christmas Story is relayed and in many parishes children are invited to participate in the discussion following the readings. You need to model for your children what the religious holidays are about by engaging in them religiously. Purchase a Nativity and a children's book on the Nativity. Playskool makes and adorable "weeble" Nativity that we bought for my son. He loves to play with it and we will start talking about the characters again very soon.

As for the Santa thing... the version of him that we acknowledge today is very commercial, but St. Nicholas was actually a giving and kind man who gave gifts to the poor children during the winter months. You may be better off if you talk to your daughter about the "real Santa"... who he was and why we celebrate his feast day by giving gifts! Santa is about the spirit of giving and the grattitude in receiving. At 5 she may actually understand most of this... also mention to her that her little sister "still believes" and that she should keep her info to herself until you say it's okay to share!

For what it's worth, most kids stop believing in Santa LONG before they admit to it so the older cousins wouldn't be shocked by her comments. Most kids figure it out due to the logisics (no chimney, flying reindeer, etc) in 1st or 2nd grade. They don't tell you b/c they don't want the presents to stop coming!

you already have a TON of responses, but i will still tell you what we did growing up. On christmas we celebrated Christ's birth. My mom always made a birthday cake for him, and still does to this day. we were taught that it wasn't about presents for us but for Christ. We did get a few presents on that day, and then as we got older we switched to January 6. As that is the Day of the Magi, when Christ received his gifts. We always got a toy, a book, and a piece of clothing. We went through times when my dad was layed off and other times he was working, but with only have 3 gifts no one ever could tell if dad was working or not. There were a few times taht we would get a "big" family gift. one year was a nintendo, another was my basketball hoop.

This is one thing we are going to start with our kids. they already get a book, but we are going to only 3 gifts, as they already have everything they need and don't need more. Plus once you start adding gifts from other family and any friends, that's A TON of things I have to find places for in the house.