Am I the Only Person Alive That Doesn't Facebook?

Updated on January 29, 2009
N.O. asks from Park Ridge, IL
19 answers

Just wondering if everyone but myself and my husband facebook? I get the idea of the fun of it all - reconnecting - easy access to sharing info and keeping connected...I just don't get the appeal of posting so much personal info to a broad audience. I understand things can be kept "private" but are they really? I've got a friend who told me her SIL broke in to her daughter's account and a whole (totally unecessary) family drama unfolded - And yes, parents should moniter kids on line use, but I personally only believe if you let them know ahead of time they could be checked up on - what she did was a total violation of privacy. Am I missing something about Facebook I should know about? Just wondering...I'm getting montly invites from friends and just have no desire to be a part of it...fill me in on what I'm missing...lol!

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M.O.

answers from Chicago on

I am sadly addicted to facebook. I am a foreigner and I love being able to be in contact with my family and friends from "home". It is always fun to see what old HS friends, roommates, college buddies and even old boyfriends (yikes) are up to these days :)

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J.A.

answers from Chicago on

Yes (Just kiddin') I've reaquainted myself with old friends from HS and college. You are missing a good laugh or just rekindling old friendships that our lives have gotten too busy for. Your level of privacy is selected by you, whether you want only friends, friends of friends or everyone to see your info. I have a blast cathing up with my old crowd and hearing about their kids and what they are up to.
I don't join too many groups and applications, but my friends are always sending me stuff. It is totally up to you. I would set up a basic profile and just check it out, you may find your friends from kindergarten only live a few blocks away, like I did!

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T.S.

answers from Chicago on

No, you're not alone, but maybe in the minority. Lol. Out of our "group" of friends, 2 aren't on and the other 5 are. I'm on it and I like it. It's 500 times better than MySpace - more mature.

I've caught up with some people I haven't seen since Jr. High and talk to some people that I really didn't know in High School, but have a lot in common with now. Actually, I'm having lunch today with 2 old friends from HS. As it turns out, we all live in the same general area now. I never would have known if I didn't FB.

You control what you put on there and what people see. I don't allow access to anyone unless I "accept" them as a friend.

I think you would be pleasantly surprised as to how much fun it is. But, it is a bit addicting.

If you still don't want to do it - then don't. I have 3 close friends that won't join. No desire at all. I tease them once in awhile, but it doesn't matter.

Have fun.

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C.G.

answers from Augusta on

I resisted Facebook too but once I got on I am totally addicted. I moved away from my hometown when I was 18 and since college I have moved 6 times in 9 years. I have a lot of people I like to keep in touch with and using facebook makes it easier. It's fun to catch up with old friends and it's easy to communicate with current friends. As fo drama I really haven't had an issue, I guess I am "over" high school and now that I am an adult I don't really have issues with drama in my life. You might find you enjoy it, I used to mock people on Facebook and now I love it. Also, no one can look at your page unless you give them permission and you don't have to post anything you don't want to share.

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S.Q.

answers from Chicago on

Nope, me neither! For personal and professional reasons I don't believe it putting out private info in a general format. I delight in reconnecting with people I care about, but I prefer that happen naturally, like running into them at weddings, funerals, or at the grocery store! Or if there is someone I miss from my past, and it is appropriate to do so, I would send them a holiday card in the mail or something like that.

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N.W.

answers from Chicago on

I think it all depends on the type of person you are. Some people want to let the past be the past...and others are curious about reconnecting with people they lost touch with.

As for people getting your information...it's just like anything else you do. If you're smart then you'll be fine. Put only what you want others to know on there and leave the rest out. It really is private UNLESS you give out your password.

A funny story...I found and reconnected with some cheerleaders from our squad in high school. We had a little reunion. One had been particularly mean to me back then so I wasn't totally excited about seeing her again. While going over old pictures at the reunion she made many comments about how unsure she was at that age, how she did a lot of things she regretted, and how she just wanted to fit in. I saw many things she did in a whole new light. It certainly changed my perspective!

Don't feel bad if you're not into facebook. There can be drama there...just as any other place in life. Just remember drama is perpetuated by PEOPLE, not the medium where the drama occurs. In other words...blame PEOPLE for the drama, not facebook, myspace or whatever!

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T.M.

answers from Chicago on

too funny. the first thing to say about facebook (and myspace for that matter) is its addicting... i have spent way too many hours sitting here looking up old friends, catching up with people i have lost touch with. i only joined a few weeks ago and i guess it is good or bad depending on why you are on there. my twenty year HS reunion is coming this fall so there has been a lot of "buzz" and the HS website had people reconnecting and chatting and then everyone ended up over on facebook doing the same. I do think it gets personal but you only put out there the info you want people to know and pictures you want people to see. I have enjoyed it because you have your set of friends saved and you can share pics of your kids and yourself without having to email them individually to the people who want to see. people are crazy on there though... there are people who are on there all day... and will keep updating their pages... oh i just had lunch... oh i just got the mail... i think i will go to the bathroom soon... give me a break. way too much free time people. it is fun, and i admit i was sucked in pretty quickly.. but mostly because i have lost touch with some old high school friends and have been loving catching up that way. if you arent interested in it, then dont do it.. but it is an easy way to keep people in touch and you can set your page to be viewed only by people that you approve and add as a friend. not sure what else to say about it! as far as the kids go... i have a niece and nephew on there and when i popped on their page unexpectedly... they definitely werent the wholesome little kiddies i rocked as babies... i had to let them know that auntie was now in the cool facebook community so they may want to watch their language a bit more :o)

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

I just had a conversation about this last weekend with one friend who is on and one who is not. I prefer not to be found by people that I lost contact with, usually there is a reason you stop connecting with people. My sister just dropped her account, she is 35 and single and found it a bit disturbing that someone from grade school who she barely knew wanted her know her birthday and posted pictures of her on his account. So, no you are not alone. I just joined this website and find that I am spending too much time on here, I can't imagine what I would do if I had another site to check.

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E.S.

answers from Chicago on

I'm with you. I ignore the invites. I don't have the time or energy or desire. I've heard some of my friends talking about it and it really sounds like high school drama. "I can't believe she asked me to be her friend.. I don't even remember her" or "I know she's only trying to be my friend so she can see what my kids look like - it's none of her business" If it's none of her business, why are you on there in the first place?!?!?!? I saw that other post about being badmouthed on facebook. Who has time for that nonsense - if that isn't immature I don't know what is. I have much more important things to do with my time (like respond to these posts on this website ha ha).

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

Your request made me laugh! I tried to resist for as long as I could, and about 2 months ago, I gave in!! It's addicting. But it is really nice to reconnect with people that you lost contact with. I just go on for fun, so I can't comment on the family drama. But beware..if you join, the first few days you will find yourself a bit obsessed.

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C.S.

answers from Chicago on

No facebook here! I don't like the idea of reconnecting with everyone from my past! If I wanted to stay in touch with people I would have. The past is the past. I worked long and hard to get certain toxic people out of my life, and don't want them to resurface. I don't feel like giving an update of my life daily. I have wonderful friends and family now, and no need to bring the past into my present!!!

B.K.

answers from Chicago on

No you're not the only person. It just seems like it! I had a professional friend of mine ask why I wasn't on Facebook and I told her because I wasn't a teenager. Well, I decided to check it out and I've reconnected with people I haven't seen nor heard from -- some more than 25 years. To me it's fun looking at pictures of friends' kids and grandkids. As for the privacy thing -- not everyone in the world can look at your info. Just people you choose. (I moved away from friends and family after college and can't just run into people in the store or at weddings like some people. For me it's fun. But it's not for everybody.)

I would just ignore the invites if you aren't interested. It can be a time waster and you probably have your hands full with your kids. But on the flip side, I really don't see anything wrong with it if it's used properly.

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

I wasn't too interested in it at first, either. But I kept receiving friend requests and finally set up a profile and got started with it about 1 or 2 months ago. Now I'm addicted to it :0). I only accept friend requests from people I know, and it's been great reconnecting with my sorority sisters and catching up with people from HS and college and seeing pictures of their families. It's a nice way to "chat" with individuals that you may not necessarily be able to sit down and make a phone call to.

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L.C.

answers from Chicago on

No Facebook hear either.

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M.B.

answers from Springfield on

Hi N.,
I laughed when I read your post becuase just last night my husband and I were talking about this very thing! We are not Facebookers either and those around us think we are crazy for not doing it. I personally still like the old fashion way of sending actual pictures with a hand written note!...lol

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M.B.

answers from Chicago on

I stricktly use Facebook as a networking tool for my home based business. There is nothing personal on my profile or even any pics of family. It can get catty....however thats YOUR choice to be involved in that. I have had no probs with it and have found that it has been a fabulous networking tool for me. :)

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

I just recently joined Facebook, but had avoided it for quite some time (I'm a teacher and I know students Facebook all the time, and I kind of feel like that is their place to be social and hang out and I don't want to intrude).

It's pretty interesting and I've reconnected with many friends from college/high school, even if just to say "hi, how's it going". I'm not originally from Chicago, so it is fun to 'hangout' virtually with my friends from hs/college who are now living all over the country and in some cases overseas. You do want to make sure that you place your settings to private, don't put out any personal information that would compromise your identity being stolen, and carefully decide what you post. Also, to avoid the 'creep factor' you do have total control over whom you can 'friend' and you can deny and ignore people who send you a friend request if you don't want them to have access.

It's no big deal if you don't do it. A polite "no thank you" would be sufficient to those who are sending you invites.

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E.P.

answers from Chicago on

No facebook here. Not saying that I won't ever do it. I'm just a pretty private person and it seems like I'm exposing part of my private life. Plus, I have a teen who I don't want to have a myspace or face book and I think the longer I hold out, the longer I can practice - "do what I say - AND what I do!" And she knows that .. without notice, I will look at her account - which is why, I think, my daughter is not pushing the issue.

I recently heard an awful story from one of my good friends. Her daughter became the victim of cyber-bullying. The nasty stuff that was being said about her and pictures that were posted were mean. Police and school got involved, parents were called and the bullying stopped. And... amazingly, these people ACTUALLY put this stuff on the internet for all to see! It's scary!

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M.J.

answers from Chicago on

no, you are not the only one...no facebook here!

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