All Play All the Time

Well it is hard, but think of it as a skill she has to learn, not that you are abandoning her! I would start by just getting out something new or something she hasn't seen in a while and tell her that she can play with that for a bit but you are going to fold laundry (or whatever). I would let her play with it and anything else for about 20 minutes while you are actively doing something else. If she fusses explain that when you're done with this specific task you will play with her again...then actually do it. ;) This way you can break into the idea of her playing by herself and she can still see you and interact with you but is basically entertaining herself. It might not work right away, but probably will eventually.

My son who will be 3 in a few weeks plays by himself quite a bit. My daughter, who is older, is also very good at it and honestly I think he just learned from her, so he's maybe not the norm, but it is really nice for both of us! Plus, don't feel bad about letting her watch a little TV. A show or two a day is fine plus she really will learn stuff if you pick a quality show and it's okay for you to want a break to sit down or make dinner!

Also, keep up the playgroups. At this age they still don't really play with others as much as near others, but maybe before you go tell her that she will need to play with the other kids or by herself but you'd like to talk to the other mommies for a while. You can always jump in if you feel like she's feeling anxious, but give her a chance!

Totally normal. It will come, but some of it is personality. My 8 year old ( who had me to herself for a while) still prefers me to play with her. My 4 year old has played wel alone since being a toddler- seriously, like 45 minutes on her own at age 2.

Ultimately, try to enjoy it and her itwill go by quickly!! It's. Not like shell never learntoentertain herself! But you can help her a bit by encourage her to play in parallel. So, keep busy with your own tasks and let her entertain herself along side you. So she doesn't feel banished, but she has some responsibility for herself. You're folding laundry, encourage her to play dress up in your closet. Doing dishes? Encourage her to color. Or better yet, let her help load the dish washer and fold clothes. The joy of a two year old is that they find this stuff fun!

I wouldn't begin to assume that you don't enjoy your time with your daughter just because you want to encourage her to be independent. The easiest way is to introduce new activities for her that she hasn't done before, get her involved and then step away for a few minutes at a time, lengthening the time every so often. Don't go far, just go sit on a chair about 5 to 10 feet away from her but still in the room. When she gets used to that, step out of the room a few minutes at a time, lengthening the time, but coming back every little bit to check on her and letting her see that you are still available to her.

Some things that are cheap and easy are:

Give her a bowl (about the size of a hospital basin that you can find at most thrift stores) of water and a baby doll with a washrag. Have her give her baby a bath. You can do the same with plastic cups and she can wash dishes.

Fold her sock into balls and have her toss them into a laundry basket.

Make homemade playdough (I can send you a recipe that's cheap and fool proof) and sit her at a table with it and some playdough tools.

Give her some froot loops and some yarn knotted at the end and let her string froot loops.

Get some clear contact paper and cut out any shape you like. Tear different colored tissue paper into little pieces and let her stick the tissue paper to the sticky back of the contact paper to make a sun catcher. Once you buy the contact paper and tissue paper you can do this a million different times, just switch up the shapes and colors of contact paper available.

It doesn't work if you just say, "Go play." You have to have a specific activity. Then you get her engaged and walk away, upping the frequency and length of time you are gone.

Hope this helps.

My dd started playing by herself around 3.5--4. But she always wanted me to play too. I would usually start playing with her dolls, but then I would say "oh I need to run and do something in the kitchen" and she'd continue playing by herself.

The one thing that I know that you have to do before expecting her to play independently is to "fill her attention tank." In other words, you play with her for 45 minutes or so. Then step away for a little bit and follow Lisa C's advice. I just want to reiterate that you HAVE to first fill her attention tank. If you don't, you won't have any success.

Not.

At.

All.

Most people are introverted. Whether they're outgoing introverts, or shy introverts, MOST people need some alone time to 'recharge'.

My son is an extrovert. He was EIGHT years old before he could spend 15 minutes on his own without going nuts. Even at 10, and even though I CONSIDER him to be spending 'time alone' for about an hour... the reality is that he never goes off on his own (like to his room), but instead will bring his work to be in the same room I am (or anyone else is) in AND will be firing off comments every few minutes or so.

If you have an extroverted kid (rare), you have my condolences.

Not a lot of people understand extroverts (because most people aren't extroverts!), but it's as PAINFUL AND EXHAUSTING for an extrovert to be left alone by themselves, as it is for an introvert to be shoved into a party or not have even 5 minutes to themselves much less the time they ACTUALLY need to recharge.

Meaning, if you have an extrovert, they're going to be melting down the SAME way the shy introverted kid does when dropped into a crazy wild birthday party with people screaming/ running/ making faces/ etc.

Everyone 'gets' the overwhelmed shy introvert.

Extroverts get just as overwhelmed. It's so sad, though, that the advice people give is polar opposite.

(Meaning people are like "Duh!" don't expect your kid not to melt down if they get overwhelmed!" to one set and "They SHOULD blah blah blah, just DO IT" to the other set.)

______

Like others have said... that means I had a HELPER!!! Dishes, laundry, cooking, mail, etc. Since I had a shadow, I put him to work. He was thrilled, and now that he's older, it's ingrained habit (instead of me nagging at him)... and i still got my stuff done.

How I encouraged alone time, is identical to how you encourage shy introverts to be cheerful social butterflies who thrive on chaos.

Very. Slowly. With low expectations of change.

We've definitely gotten there. But there was no way we could have gotten there as a toddler.

I guess it's just what she's used to?
I had three kids in six years and I never really played with them. They "helped" me around the house of course, and we snuggled and read stories, but other than that they played pretty well on their own and with each other. Even my youngest with ADHD was good playing on her own (although that girl talked NONstop, and still does at 13, lol!)
Does she go to preschool or kindergym or anything like that, where she get to be around other kids and adults besides you?
Do you take her to the park a lot, and sit back and let her/encourage her to play on her own?
I don't think there's any "right " answer here, but I know I could never spend all day playing with a child, even my own child!
I guess as long as YOU don't mind then it's not a problem :)

I put a gate up in the hallway, I could see all the way down it into the kids rooms when they were that age. They had to go play so I could get stuff done. They always played just fine once they figured out they had to stay on the other side of the gate for a while each day.