Aggressive Kids in Daycare

I had a similar situation from both ends. My elder son now six got bitten a repeatedlyat a daycare. He was about 2 when it happened. I did not want to move his childcare but I did. Obviously if the daycare cannot prevent it then they are not attentive or understaffed. In another situation my eledest age 5 went to daycare and was the hitter and kicker. He got dismissed from the daycare. I put him in private care, along with his brother. A friend of mine was able to watch them, she had two children and he didn't have the same issue. So you may want to think if the daycare is the one you really want your child in.

This kid SHOULD be kicked out of daycare. The director is being irresponsible about the situation. SHe should be talking to the child's parents about finding him somewhere else to go. I know kids fight but if it is going on all the time to everyone, they should fix the problem FOR GOOD! SOrry your son is going through this. Just keep on them til it gets fixed!! :) C.

Well I do not know if this is advice but I am a in-home childcare provider and I recently had to remove a child from my care as he was hitting the other children I take care of with his hands, feet and toys. This child was only in my care for a week and there were 6 instances in one week and while none of injuries were serious enough for the medical attention of a doctor or nurse I simply could not let him place the other children in my care in physical danger. I have been in the childcare industry for over 12 years and I have no tolerance for children who repeatedly harm others. I do not mean to be harsh with a no tolerance policy but it keeps everyone safe and happy. My parents appreciate the fact that I am looking out for the well being of everyone and that I do not sit back and let biting, hitting or any physical aggression take place. I would see if the daycare would let your son or the other students causing the problem change classes. I know your son loves his teacher and that can be a hard decision to change teachers or even daycares but you do not need to be worrying about the safety or happiness of your child while working to support your family. Yes biting and physical aggression can be "phases" that kids go through but it sounds like the daycare is not doing much to prevent or redirect the child(ren) that are causing injury to others. I hope this helps.

Ask the director again for a plan of action how they are going to handle this behavior. Tell her that if they don't implement something to stop it you'll have to find other care for your son. Since they know the offender I would suggest 'shadowing'. My kids were both biters (and bitees). One daycare used the shadowing method and it stopped the problem for good for us. Basically if the child bites/hits/assaults another child twice in one day they are automatically assigned to be a teachers shadow - the child is not allowed out of arms reach of the teacher for the rest of the day. If it happens more than once in a week the child is a shadow for the rest of the week. The kids HATE it because they can't play. It also helps the teacher to figure out what is triggering the child to act out so they can avoid it in the future.

Good luck!

My son was also picked on in daycare from ages 12 months to 2 years..when we finally had enough and took him out of this particular daycare. He was being bitten repeatedly every day. I talked to the teachers and the director and they claimed they could not be sure it was one particular child since it always happened when the teachers were not looking.

Turns out one of the biters was the director's nephew!! I demanded that the biters be pulled out of the class or plain kicked out of the daycare if the parents would not permit harsher treatment other than saying "that is not a good thing to do to your friends".

Obviously, nothing happened. The biters were still allowed to stay despite the potential hazard to MY child. I am talking bites to the point of bruising and sometimes bleeding!!

Basically, that child needs to be removed from the daycare. Document EVERYTHING and make sure the daycare is doing the same so you both have evidence if it came to needing it.

I know everyone works hard etc these days but children's safety needs to come first.

J.

While I understand what you are going through is very frustrating, I don't think the "problem" child should be thrown out of daycare. Depending on the age of the agressive child, he could be going through a stage and the daycare workers should be trained to handle all types of children and should be trained to redirect kids when necessary. As much as you love the daycare that you are in, maybe a move to one that has more experienced teachers would suit you better. It sounds like the teachers in his room are not good at figuring out triggers and keeping children separated when necessary. I would look at teacher to student ratios, whether your daycare is accrediated, what types of degrees / training that your teachers have, etc.

Remember at one point or another it could be your child that is being the aggressive one and since most kids go through this stage, you would hope that other people would be understanding and the daycare workers are prepared to help you instill acceptable behavior in your child. Good luck!