Age to Be Left Alone

I think people were a little harsh by telling you to MYOB.... No, I wouldn't leave my 8 year old home alone..

Here is a link that might be useful. http://www.mnchildcare.org/families/qm_home_alone.php I don't know if the counties have any specifics, but the state does not mandate an age at this time. That being said, if something happened while she is alone at that age, then the parents could still be held negligent because the general recommendations are that under 10 is too young.

I think that at 8 many kids are ready to be at home for short periods of time if they are comfortable with it, know how to reach someone in an emergency, etc. My 8yo son loves to stay home while I run to the store quickly (30-40 minutes). BUT I see a big difference between you leaving a child at home for a little bit and a child getting off a school bus and then into the house and staying there for 60-90 minutes. Personally too many things can happen between the time they step off the bus and enter the house, unless the school bus driver waits. Personally I would not be comfortable with that.

I stayed home back in the day when I was 8. Latch key kid. Got home at 3 and my mom did not come home til 5:30 or 6. I knew the rules.
Call when I got home.
Do not go outside.
Keep the door locked.
Do not use the stove or oven.
Work on my homework.
If I was worried I could call my mom. No cell phones back then either..

I used to be able to run to the grocery store and leave our daughter home, she usually watched a video.. Started this when she was 8. She has always been a mature child.

I truly think it depends n the safety of where you live, the neighbors and of course the maturity of the child.

I liked being trusted. I was not scared. It was my home and I felt safe.

Every child is different. While it's family - I think it's MYOB!

I would leave my children at age 8 home alone. because they KNOW the rules. how to use the phone, etc. My kids are also trained in Tae Kwon Do. Greg is a 1st Don Black Belt. I've seen him in action. So I'm not "afraid" to leave him home alone.

If the girl is responsible. Some kids are at 8. then mind your own business.

I know some adults who shouldn't be left alone!! It's all about maturity!!

I was a latchkey kid starting at 7 (second grade). Very specific rules, get off bus, come home, call my mother. No strangers, no telling anyone mom wasn't home, etc. If I wanted to deviate from that, such as go to a neighbor's house, I would have to call my mom first.

My kids - my oldest is 6.5 and I would feel completely comfortable leaving him home alone for an hour or two. He is just extremely responsible, makes good judgements, and is resourceful. (I don't because I'm sure that would be child neglect or something else against the law). My second child (who is only 4) probably won't be left at home until he's a teenager (and I'll probably be even less likely to leave him alone then with all the teenage problems he could get himself into). He's impulsive, doesn't think things through, overly emotional, pretty irresponsible. It really depends on the child at the age you're talking of.

Don't know if MN has a law on that. TX did NOT. (Hmm. I don't even know what my own state's rules are on this).
I used to babysit my bff's son (pick him up from school, get him a snack and started on homework, take him to soccer or cubscouts, etc) but now that we've moved, he walks home from school (school is in the neighborhood, a 10 minute walk from door to door), he gets the snack his mom laid out in the morning, he does his homework, plays video games, reads his goofy books, texts his mom and friends. She comes home 2 hours later and on the way, he reads his "reading assignments" to her on the cellphone. By the time she gets home they're ready to go to whatever sport he's currently on, or cubscouts with no issues. He's a latchkey kid but there's a neighbor if he needs anything. That's not too much to ask an 8 year old. He started at 8 and it's been a year and a half, no issues, and he also maintains his honor roll standing, so not even his homework is suffering. It depends on the child, which the mom knows well, as to whether they can be left at home or not. (I was very responsible at 8. My brother, even though he's a good person, was more irresponsible even at 16).
But I wouldn't think this should be a concern to you, as long as it's legal. I think some of your responses sound a little harsh. I don't think you're trying to be nosy or patting yourself on the back....whether I think my kid's responsible or not, if the law decided there was a minimum age for being left alone I'd do my best to follow it for fear of what could happen if we were caught. I'm sure that's where you're coming from.

ETA: I looked it up online and it said MN has no minimum age allowed set (only a few states do), but in hennepin county, if there's suspicion of child neglect: (copy/pasted the rest):
Assessments will be conducted on the following:
Children under age 8 left alone for any period of time.
Children ages 8, 9, and 10 can be left alone for traditional latch-key hours under certain circumstances. (before and after school)
Children alone over 24 hours if parents whereabouts are unknown to children. In all of above CPS will involve police for immediate safety check of children where appropriate.
Children 11 to 14 may baby-sit with the expectation that an adult will return later in day.
Children 15 and older may baby-sit for more than 24 hours.

I would leave well enough alone and MYOB.

There are stupid laws for all kinds of things. Most people ignore stupid laws. (Stupid laws were passed by governmental bodies which says a lot about the people we elect and we, as voters, who elect them.) What is a really stupid law? Try the law Maryland had on the books until they redid their laws in the 1970's that said, when a horseless carriage approached an intersection, a boy of at least 16 years of age, with a pole at least 10 feet long with a banner on the end at least 3 feet long must proceed to the intersection and yell "Horseless carriage coming. Horseless carriage coming." before the horseless carriage may proceed through the intersection.

Good luck to you and yours.

Okay, I'm gonna get flack on this one, but I think ANY 8 year old is too young. The brain is only developed so far when it comes to making proper decisions. I wouldn't be comfortable with it. However, I do understand that this is just my opinion, and I know some people may have no choice due to hardship situations.

I doubt there is a law against it, but check for your state. Just do a google search.

I'm sure your SIL and niece have a system in place. I know I was a single parent when my older two were still in elementary school. I was making around 22K per year and I couldn't afford daycare. We lived month to month. I was like $20 over to qualify for help, something really small amount. My kids were probably in 3rd and 1st grade for just a little over an hour or right at an hour before I got home. I worked maybe 4-5 miles from our house. They called me as soon as they came in the apartment. They were not allow to go outside until I came home or have anyone in the apartment. I'm sure it was illegal, but I had no other way to do it. One of my neighbors sorta watched out for them. My heart would start worrying from 3:30-4:15 PM until I heard the phone ring at work. Then I knew they got home, they did ride the bus. I was out of my office at 5:00 PM on the dot.
Yes, she's growing up faster than even her parents want, but if your SIL is in a similar situation, I do understand. I'm not saying it's right, but I understand.

I can understand how some are saying MYOB but to your question, each state has its own laws. In IL, a child cannot be left alone until the age of 14. that means I can get in BIG trouble. I agree it should be based on the situation (how far away are you and what are you doing), the childs maturity etc. One time I got home to a cop in my living room. One of my girls (10 at the time) had called the police because she saw a van pass several times and got scared. The cop stayed until I got home so the kids would feel safe. He did not lecture me about leaving them alone or anything. But I see your point of a neighbor reporting it since some people can be real jerks and do things for spite or just because they want to. And then you end up with an investigation, leaving you with someone that might decide you are a horrible parent. I do however make sure my kids know who to turn to in case of an emergency. In our case, we have 2 neighbors they can run to that will not turn them away.

It depends on the maturity of the child.

I was leaving my 8 yr old for an hour alone while we were a few mins away. By 10 he was mature enough to watch his younger brothers ( 6 & 7 at the time) for a while, never more than a couple hours.

My second child will be 13 this year and up until this year I have not felt he was mature enough to be left alone. While my third son will be 12 this year I have felt comfortable leaving him alone since he was 9-10.

#1 &3 have been babysitting my younger ones since they were 10 by themselves. I have only started leaving my younger ones with #2 in the last couple of months and with him I still wont leave them with him for more than 2 hour tops.

It all comes down to what the child can handle and thier maturity level. While alot can happen in 1 - 1.5 hrs really its a short time frame. I'm sure she will be ok, chances are she will sit and watch tv or something similuar. As long as she knows to stay in the house and not to answer the phone unless its a number she knows and don't answer the door, she will be ok.

Here in our county in Ia there isn't a law on it after 8. It comes down to the maturity of the child.

Now if it was for 3-4 hours then I wouldn't feel as comfortable with it, but I think 1- 1.5 is ok.

You've gotten a lot of responses...and I didn't read through them all, but this guidance comes in our weekly elementary school update. I actually feel like my 6 year old would be okay at home for an hour at a time (maybe in the morning and afternoon), but I wouldn't do it until he's 8 like the guidance document states. I think it totally depends on the child.

Children Home Alone: Dakota County Guidelines

Children 7 years old or under cannot be left alone for any period of time.
Children 8-9 years old can be alone for up to 2 hours.
Children 10-13 years old cannot be alone for more than 8-12 hours.
Children under 11 years old cannot babysit younger children.

All of these guidelines assume that children know how to reach a parent or adult, are not afraid to be alone, and have average behavior, health, and maturity levels for their age. Occasionally other circumstances are considered on a case by case basis.

Stop trying to one-up your SIL.

You're the perfect mom, and I'm sure you're better than she is. But maybe give her some space to make her own mistakes. :)

No way would I leave my 8 year old home alone for an hour.
10-12 seems right to me, again, depending on the maturity of the kid.

The National SAFEKIDS Campaign recommends that no child under the age of 12 be left at home alone.

Here's a list, by state, of recommendations, if available....interesting some states say "none" so what does that mean? Throw your toddler in a room while you go to work? Weird, huh?

http://www.latchkey-kids.com/latchkey-kids-age-limits.htm

You're concerned about your niece. I would be too. Not sure where all this MYOB stuff is coming from, but I say "Thank God for people who keep an eye out for potentially unsafe situations!"

There are latch key kids even younger than that everywhere. I think 8 years old is plenty old enough to start with home alone training. I do not think if the child is out in the country that I would be comfortable with that though. If there was an emergency it would take too long for assistance or a neighbor to assist.

I do believe that home alone time is something that is a process. An hour at home alone for a school kid is something they could do if they were at the stage where they had learned to do it.

What I am saying is if the child has learned to do this and is doing it well there is not really anything wrong with it.

Call your local child welfare office and ask about latch key kids. Make up a story so that you won't be turning her in accidentally.

For instance say:

"Hi, I am considering going back to work and have an 8 yr. old girl. I am wondering about latch key kids. Are there laws about this? Can she stay home after getting off the bus until I get home?"

You are not saying that you are doing this, you are not saying you know someone who is doing this, you are saying you want to know about laws that could effect someone doing this.

Personally, I would never leave my 8 yr old alone for an hour after school. My daughter was about 12 years old when i started letting her stay home for an hour after school. She is 14 now and I still sometimes freak out when she is home alone. I don't know what the legal age is, but i know it is not 8 years of age. I want to say maybe 11-12. She should check with her state, because if someone turns her in, she could be in trouble. I would be more worried of the fact that someone who try and harm my 8 year old if they found out he/she was walking home to a house with no adult supervision. Children are so vulnerable at that age.

It completely depends on the child. Some children can handle this at 8 while others can't at 12. My daughter will be in third grade next year and I would not hesitate to leave her home alone for an hour.

Also - the law in Illinois does not state that children under 14 can't be left alone. The law states that that children under this age can't be left home alone without supervision for an unreasonable amount of time.

I don't know about the other states but when my kids were small there was a min age when you could leave them alone and it was 11. I know they could babysit legally at 11 also so I put the two older ones in a babysitting class at that time. The thing about leaving a 8 year old home alone is if there is an emergancy, someone breaking into the house, a fire, even an accident, the parents could be charged with child endangerment. For those who say myob and such, won't have to live with the guilt if something happened to your niece and you didn't speak up. If it were me, I would say something to her, offer to watch her if possible, suggest an after school program if there are some available. At age 8 they think they are much bigger then they really are and take chances which they shouldn't.

Depends on the city, state, county even. They had this discussion on BBC once and the variety of answers was astounding. One lady actually had a link that basically was a web page that someone put together that would link you to each states law on this subject.

Where I live, it was it had to be your own children and one had to be at least 10 years of age and they could be left for up to 2 hours a day alone. They could babysit like you traditionally think of when 12 years of age. You could be left overnight alone when you were 16.

Well that was pry about 3 years ago. My older sister was telling me they changed our law again and the ages aren't so spelled out anymore. Something about how it would be evaluated on a per case basis basically for any child under 12 but it really wasn't technically legal anymore but from what I read if the child could basically answer about a dozen questions to a cops satisfaction it was ok. It was things like what to do in a fire and such.

BUT I have an almost 10 year old, 8 year old and a 2 year old. I wouldn't leave any of them alone for longer than running the trash out to the bin. But that is just me. When my son is 12 I think we'll still need a proper sitter. He just isn't responsible enough in my opinion. Now when my daughter is 12 I wouldn't be surprised if I was confident in her though. So I can see what the cops are saying when it really is up to the child's competency rather than an age.

C.,

It's YOUR niece and YOUR SIL, after all, and you have a right to be concerned, if that is how you are feeling. I only heard you asking for information and didn't read any ulterior motives into your question.

In my view, eight years old is too young to be on her own for an extended period of time. Even if a child has a decent level of maturity, knows the rules and follows them, a variety of events and situations can occur that she is simply not equipped to deal with at such a young age.

I see you and SIL are in different counties, but you don't say how far apart your homes are. If your SIL agrees, is there any way, if you are at home and available, that your niece could spend some of that after-school time with you? Just a thought.

Not sure why you're getting MYOB responses, questions about your motivations, and other unnecessary comments, but now that you have the answer to your question (April's response), you won't have to worry about your SIL getting in trouble. If, however, there is anything you can do to be a presence in your niece's life, then I would ask SIL if she could spend a little more time at your home.

Best to you and your family.

J. F.

I'm not sure what Minnesota law is, but it would be pretty easy to google.

8 does seem a bit young. I am just now leaving my daughter (who is 11 1/2) alone for about 40 minutes after school until the babysitter gets there. But we just moved from Chicago (where I NEVER would have left her alone.... just a different environment) to somewhere much safer. So, it's a different story.

In IL, though, the law enforcement officers who would "investigate" have a list of "factors" they would look at to determine if a child (at any age) left alone would fall into "neglect".

Typically, though, the standard "agreed to" age is like 11 or 12 ish.

This might clarify:

http://hideyourkids.com/YKKt/DRwqCzMRz7J1/064SC/e3v/>

I think what a parent has to ask themselves is at what age do I have to be as a parent to accept the fact that my child was too young to be home alone.