Advice to Give 13 Yr Old Boy

We have a NO Bullying policy at my daughter's middle school.. and at my son's elementary school. There are several banners on the school walls stating that it is not tolerated! If it happens then the bully is sent to after school detention. I would have been up at that school the very next morning bright & early. Let them know that you will not stand for it. Nip it in the bud. How DARE the teacher feel that bullying is acceptable. Oh i don't think so!

I googled (why bully) and there were many articles that popped up.
http://www.protocol-education.com/upload/Bullying.pdf
Lots of luck to you

This age is hard both for boys and girls,been there with both.One thing that may help is for him to keep track of the grades that this other person makes on papers. See if this other young man may be jealous of his grades and that may be the cause of some of this.The fact that he has now found someone that he can boss around is another part of it. Good luck. Just another mom.....

You don't have to call the teacher everytime, but this time - I think it may be warranted. She could be setting up a bullying type of situation. At the very least, the kid who hit your son should have been punished also.

The way your son told it, he was the only one punsihed and it was for tattling??? What school sits 13 year olds in a corner??? Also calling a person, any person a dummy should not be accepted.

TALK TO THE TEACHER NOW. If you cannot get satisfaction, talk to the chain of command and take it to the schoolboard. Most teachers are overworked now, and underpaid; but there are some - just as in every walk of life, who should not be there. You don't have to be nasty about it, just approach it with the teacher as - this is what my son said; would like to hear your side of it type of thing; and make sure that you find out if the other kid who hit your son was punished. Hitting in a classroom should not be condoned - nor should calling children names.

If I were in the same position, I would do the following:

- What does it say in the school handbook about bullying?

- I would contact the teacher and ask for a meeting. If after several days the teacher is non=responsive, I would escalate it to the principal and request a meeting between you, the teacher and the principal. If the school uses an email system I would email the teacher - than later email the principal with a cc to the teacher.
- Explain to the teacher what happened and that how she treated your son was not right and you expect the outcome to be different next time.
- Contact the boys parents and explain to them what happened and ask them to talk to their son about his behavior. If it continues, do not be afraid to have a follow up conversation with the parents and use the word bullying.
- Explain to the school if the behavior of this other boy is tolerated you will take the matter up with another source, a) the school board or b) the local authorities

Bullying in school is illegal in Texas. Have your son go and speak to the Assistant Principal. In the meantime you need to also call the school and let them know about this incident.

Tell them your son will be speaking to them about this and that you expect to know from your son what the school is going to do about this and you want the school to also let you know.

Make sure they also know how the teacher handled this. Tell them you want to know her side of the story.

The advice to your son is that, bullies are immature and and insecure. If this happens again, tell your son he is to tell the bully to back off. If others are around, he should then ask those people to also report this behavior to an adult so that this bully will not continue this behavior with others. If the Bully says anything or continues, bully your son request to go to the Principal's office, right in front of the Bully and report the incident.

Do NOT allow them to move your son. Tell them the bully should be removed or have his scheduled changed if these behaviors continue.

Oh, Liz. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry for your boy and for you. How terrible that he got punished for this! Bullying is illegal in many states and he SHOULD tell the person in charge! I would speak to the principal about this issue, the teacher is there to protect the children.

But as far a your son goes, I think it is important for children and adults to understand that those who hurt others are often those who are hurting. Maybe his home life is bad, maybe he just loathes himself, who knows? But people who feel loved and happy don't treat others badly. The best way to deal with this is to not accept the gift of hurt from this bully. Recognize that it is the BULLY's issue and not his. Bully is only trying to share his unhappiness and your son has the power to reject and ignore it, in the same way he would reject a birthday gift of rotten meat. There are some gifts not worth accepting.

If he needs a way to react, I think that the only reaction anyone needs to have is to breathe. If you are breathing you are OK. Just take a breath. Focus on breathing in and then out. Keep doing it until the moment has passed. And DO ask to have your son sit next to someone other than this kid!

I was bullied by my mom, and it took me 34 years to figure this out. Now we're friends because I have learned not to accept the gift of her fear, anger or hurt.

I wish you the best.

As an educator, I am always appalled by teachers that punish students that report what they have been told to report and be punished for it. I would speak to the teacher and make sure that his version is similar to hers. If you do not get the support you should from the teacher, my next step would be speaking to the principal about the matter.

The fact that the teacher made your son sit in a corner for telling on the bully is inexcusable. I would make an appointment with the counselor for his grade level &, if that doesn't work, meet with the principal. If not corrected, the incidents could escalate to a point where law enforcement would need to be called. (Been there)

My nephew recently went through a problem with a bully at school. He is 13 years old and in the 7th grade. Anyway, this bully started last year making fun of my nephew's teeth. He dreaded going to school. On the second day of school, this bully started in again. My nephew decided that he was not going to take it anymore. He went to the principal's office and filed a complaint. The bully was counseled and we all felt the situation was over. It wasn't. This kid continued harassing my nephew (and thankfully did it in front of two teachers). The teachers turned in the bully. This kid is now in alternative school. So, with all of this said, my advice is for you to go to the principal and file a complaint against the bully and the teacher. I wouldn't settle for anything less than the teacher being reprimanded and the bully being removed from your son's class.

You should contact the teacher and find out what their perception of the situation was and then contact school administration, maybe your son's assigned counselor along with the principal of the school. Bullying cannot go unaddressed especially when it has moved beyond cruel words and escalated to actual physical violence.
You might also ask your son if he would like to take a self-defense or karate class - not for retaliation but to help his confidence and help him feel better about dealing with a situation when he might not have help close by. This may just help him come to terms and prevent another situation.

There are always three sides to every story however it is wonderful that your son feels good enough to come home and tell you what happened. Unless you are a mother who jumps at everything your sons says which makes him come home with a story and I don't think you are, I would not tolerate this at all and I wouldn't care that they might not like hearing about your son and his troubles. That teacher had no right to do that if that is truly what happened. I would immediately call the school, set up an appointment with the Principle and the teacher and get to the bottom of it. If this is not stopped now the other boy could and probably will continue this treatment to your son because that boy now knows he got away with it. I would also tell that teacher that anytime a child comes to them for help they should never call them a name, punish them and put them in a corner. This would stop today if it was my son. I would never tolerate this, plus it isn't running everytime your son says something, it is protecting your son and also showing him that there are other ways to solve problems or issues if they get to a point that the first way doesn't work. Get to the bottom of this. You may also find that it didn't happen quite like your son said and maybe your son started the ruckus but at least you will know the truth. At this point always believe your son until you find out otherwise. The only person your son can go to when all else fails is you. Good Luck.

Thats outrageous that he got in trouble for telling the teacher.
All thats teaching him is that he can't go to a authority figure. It shouldn't be that way.
Bullying is not supposed to be tolerated in schools. Maybe this is something that needs to be brought up with the principal for starters.
Document everything . Hopefully this won't progress but if it does, be sure to document every incident.

I agree completely with Glenna J, not that the others aren't good advice because bullying is dead wrong. Start with the Teacher. Also, ask your son if that is OK? He may want to just vent but not want Mom to step in, just yet It is GREAT that he will confide in you. You are an AWESOME Mom!!

I feel really bad that this situation has happened to your family. I tend to be a calm person and approach issues of this nature with a level head. I would start at the source, the teacher. I would immediately set an appointment with the teacher. If I did not receive a response from her the same day, I would be at the school the very next day ready to meet with her during her conference period. My approach with the teacher would be to assure her that you want the two of you to be partners in providing the best education possible in the most safe environment for your son. I would ask her to explain the situation that happened and clarify if there were any missing pieces to the story. Keeping a level head and not assuming your son has provided the complete story will give you a better chance to determine your next steps and to secure the teacher as an ally instead of an enemy.
If you are not satisfied with the teacher's response, then I would go up the chain of command. I would immediately schedule a meeting with the principal and request an appropriate response to the situation. I would escalate the situation to the school board, if necessary. Bullying is an issue in all schools these days. It is the schools responsibility to provide a safe learning environment for all our kids. It is also important that we as parents ensure that we support our children and provide them with the tools they need should a situation arise where they need to protect themselves. Your son needs to be in some sort of martial arts program. Hang in there Mom. You and your son will get through this and he will be better prepared to handle adversity in the future.

I don't have an older child, but I'd be pissed if the school system expected my son to just take whatever some other kid wanted to dish out. Plus your son can't even do anything back without getting in serious trouble, so this is how I would get around the system. 1. I would write a formal letter to the teacher and send copies to the principle as well that states theat you request your son be moved to another seat if the teacher is unable to stop the bullying. Then in the letter explain that until your child is moved to another seat, he has been told to scream at the top of his lungs "Keep your hands off me!" the very minute the kid hits him or bully's him. This obviously won't help with verbal taunts, but should stop the physical in school at least. Just an idea.... don't know if your son could/would do it though. Godd luck.. this is really rough to deal with. I personally stopped all bullys in school by staring them down. Most back off if you don't show fear. Bully usually says something to the effect of "what you looking at?" I would always respond, "Just thinking the same thing, great minds think alike!" Usually shuts bully up. BAck handed compliment.

This behavior is NOT ok. The teacher's response was inexcusable. Go to your principal and request a conference with the teacher present. They need training on how to deal with bully behavior. It takes intervention form adults trained in this to stop the situation. Your child's feelings were invalidated which can further lead to feelings of helplessness and being a victim. Unfortunately, this leads to bully behavior.

Google how to deal with bully behavior to get yourself up to speed on the subject.
If need be , get other parents involved. Tell your principal want your school to put into place a ZERO Tolerance Bullying police with professional staff training on the subject.
Good luck.

I am sorry to hear that your son experienced this. My son experienced the same and he is seven. I don't agree with you on not calling because you think they don't want to hear about his troubles, excuse me. I would be in that teachers face and we would talk. So many parents need to understand bullying is SERIOUS and kids younger than your son have committed suicide.

I encourage my son and help him to understand why bullies do what they do. Please take this seriously. Call and set up a conference with the teacher ASAP and tell the teacher that was unacceptable and that she is their to "protect" your child and not just teach.

If your son is a victim of physical violence at school, I'm pretty sure the administrative staff would like to know about it. If reporting it to the teacher does not get adequate results, you are free to report incidents to the Assistant Principal or principal of the school. Keep notes of dates, particular incidents, what student was involved in what class, etc. for their records.

I would be up at the school this morning demanding to speak with the principal and the teacher about this matter. Physical violence (and mental) of any kind is not allowed, nor should be tolerated in schools. Did the teacher punish the student who hit your son and called him a name? Worrying about a child tattle-taleing is something you correct/punish in kinder/1st/2nd grades, not in 13 year old students.

My son, who is a 2nd grader, has gotten in trouble for "hitting" another student when they were both just playing around. This was obviously bully behavior that must be nipped in the bud right now. I would also demand, though it may be hard for get it done, that the teacher apologize in class to your son. His/her behavior for publicly punishing your son and not the student who committed the wrong is unacceptable. If your concerns are not met, I would also demand that your son be switched to another teacher.

The fact that your son was punished by sitting in a corner makes me mad. What has the school system - no the world come to that the person who behaves is the one is trouble. I would march right down to that school and speak to the principle and the teacher together. We are teaching our kids to accept the wrong doing and hide from those that bully and push others around. Also, the child that did the hitting is learning that he can continue to hit others and get away with it. Would the teacher like it if someone hit her and then she sat in the corner because she told the police.
sorry I am so angry but just can't believe society today. So glad that my children are grown and I don't have to put up with some of the teachers out there today.

If your son got in trouble for reporting bullying to his teacher, then you need to escalate this to the principal. Don't allow your son to be bullied. It is very serious.

I'm really surprised at the teachers reaction, tattle tale? at 13, really? I think that's a bit old for the tattle tale business. There is no excuse for anyone to put their hands on your child, and he definitely shouldn't have been punished for that. (Sitting in the corner at 13, really?)

I would suggest to first talk to the teacher. Sometimes there is more to the story. Your son still may have been right, but the teacher may have had a different perspective and may have acted without all the facts. If that doesn't work definitely go to the principal. Get the school counselor involved if you have to, after all it's their job to make sure our children are healthy, and well adjusted. If this other child is bully your son, odds are he is bulling other people and he may need some help.

Trust you instincts, if you think it's wrong don't be afraid to stand up for it. But always do it calmly in case there is more to the story.

Hang in there!

The teacher called him a tattle tale and sat him in a corner? I would schedule a conference with the principal to question this teacher's credentionals. She/he obviously needs some senseitivity training.

Hello,

I would have a meeting with the principle and the school. The teacher humiliating a 13 year old is unacceptable. The teacher just gave more power to the bully by punishing your son for communicating.
I have a first grader. She had another girl pinching her in class. My daughter told her teacher and the teacher's reply was that was tattling and to go sit down. It is unacceptable for a child to not be HEARD and acknowledged.
I know you have concern of sounding like the mom that whines with the school officials, but I think you need to be assertive with his teacher that you are aware of the situation and strongly suggest she listen to communication from kids that are being bullied.
I think you are on the right track with the explanation you have given your son. Encourage him to focus on his true friends and try to ignore the bully. You and your son will be in my prayers. Take care.

Liz,

First, I would DEFINITELY enroll your son in a self defense class -KARATE, etc. to give him confidence.

The same thing happened to my son when he was in elementary school in the 70's. This is how we handled it, FIRST - Tell the teacher and if she DOES NOT do anything; SECOND - You personally take care of the kid. If you follow these RULES we will STAND behind you if you or we are called to the principal's office.

It also helped that he had taken just the beginning of Karate and only KNEW the movements without using them. Once he demonstrated the moves WITHOUT even actually using them the BULLYS would not pick on him any moore.

Good Luck,
M.

this is how i handled getting hit/bullies in elementary and jr.high. once hit i would face them and say "dude, dont hit me". making a face holding my hand up and tone of voice like what the heck you idiot type of voice/body language. if they hit me again i would say in a very firm voice DO NOT HIT ME! i rarely got hit bullied ( there was a lot of depantsing at the jr. high level, and alot of weggies given, i received neither. i had lots of friends and would even befriend the person that hit me as long as they knew not to hit. never did i have an experience where the teacheer did not remove me from that seat to another to get way from the bully. from what you wrote your son seems a bit woosy for a 13 yr old boy. i strongly suggest that dad handle this situation, moms tend to be too kind in this type of situation, time and a place for everything and this is the time for Dad~ good luck let us know what worked for you.

You go to that school and document that situation with the Principal!!! That teacher was wrong to "get on to him" or punish him on anyway!!!! Your son should feel comfortable talking to any teacher in that school about ANY situation!! That will give him a complex! Your little darlings :) problems are theirs, when it comes to school! I can't beleive that happened?!? I'm serious! That's cruel! Your son did the right thing by talking to a teacher, instead of retaliating (sp).... Isn't tat we are trying to do, support peace not violence....

Your a good mamma!!

Enjoy your son, he sounds very calm natured and very good judge of right and wrong, GOOD parenting on your part, they learn from us! :)

My husband gave our 10 year old the best advice... he said that when the other child reaches out to hit to grab his arm, look him straight in the eye, and say, "Stop it!"

My son tried this the next day and came home thrilled saying, "It worked!!!"

Good luck.

What that boy did was called hazing and that is against school rules and the teacher did the same thing by punishing the innocence child. I would talk to the teacher and get her side of the story, and if that does not work go to the principle of the school. And if you have to go higher up do it.

I am a child advocate and I will tell you this has to stop now. You would be surprise how many child have depression from stuff like that including killing themselves.

A parent I was represented asked the child therapists how to handle a child saying something rude to your child. And he said for her child to say this: Why would you say something so rude to me? And he said when confronted the other kid will usually stop, because they do not know how to reply. However, if that does not work, you should never let this continue, he is at an age this really hurts.

If you do not get results from the principle
Good luck.

I feel you pain! My son has bullied right after we moved here in 7th grade. He didn't tell us right away but he kept saying how much he hated school and didn't want to go. Finally, he told us about the bullying. Our situation was unique because these were kids from New Orleans that were bullying him. My son was the biggest kid in class and that is what appealed to this boys. Finally my son told us what was going on. I will say that the school was responsive. However, they were mush more responsive when one of the boys kicked my son so hard he couldn't move his leg. Its called "dead leg". The school police contacted me at work and told me what had happened and asked if we wanted to press charges. I said "absolutely". I was tired of dealing with the little thug and his family. Did this stop the problem? No, his little thug friends approached my son after school. My son told them he had a black belt (which he did) and didn't want to hurt them but would if they hit him. Well they didn't believe my son and he hit one of the boys in the nose and blood went everywhere. My son did not get in trouble because he warned them several times and one of the boys took the first swing. No one ever bothered my son again. I would go to the school and make an appointment with the principal. Get this on records in case it escalates. Find out what your district's policy is for bullying. Most are zero tolerence. The teacher was very wrong in how she handled the situation and now you need to clean up her mess. Good luck!!!

You need to protect your son and what that teacher did was inexcusable. If a child can't feel safe with teachers and parents then who can they feel safe with. What the boy behind him is doing is bullying and it is not acceptable. You call that teacher and tell her under no circumstances will you allow your child to be bullied and when you are not around it is her job to protect not punish. Tell your son it was not right for the teacher to do that. If that doesn't work go over her head. That teacher knew better than to punish your child. As a former teacher I can tell you that I would rather have a parent talk to me about their child then not especially if I misunderstood a child. On the other hand if this is a daily happening and the teacher told him not to "tattle" until class was over etc... then the situation would be different. Still I don't think standing in the corner is a normal punishment in school - very demeaning... and while I doubt the latter is the case I think you need to contact her immediately. Power to the Mommy!

Hi Liz,

I am sorry that your son is having a difficult time. I fully agree with all the ladies about bullying. It is uncalled for and needs to be addressed. Secondly, putting a 13 year old in a corner is very humiliating. That is something you do in elementary. The teacher should recognize that this is a very sensitive age. He should be able to talk with the teacher freely about resolving a problem instead of being punished. Good luck.

Hi Liz
I just recently went through this with my 7th grade son. My son is considered to be a "nerd". So he was bullied and he told and it was a "mild" punishment for the bully. So the bully kept bullying my son. It kept escalating to the point where 3 boys held my son down and drew on him. I had already been to the school once but like I said it was a "mild punishment". So when it got to that point, I went back to the school and unfortunately, I had to get ugly with the school. I told them that if they didn't handle it, that I would and they don't want me to handle it. The school, took me at my word. This time the boy suspended. However, he tried one more time. By then my son had it with his bully. I've always taught my children that they should never start a fight, but they can finish one. I've told my children that if they physically fight, they could be in trouble and suspended. However, if they're defending themselves, I don't have a problem with that. So my son had to whip that bully's behind but that bully doesn't mess with my son anymore and no one else messes with him anymore. Unfortunately, there are times when the victim has to defend themselves physically for the mess to stop. You should also ask your husband how do you think your son should handle this bully. Your husband is a man and your son is growing into a man. So there's another advice. But the most important advise is getting your son out of that teacher's class. She was completely wrong for what she did. You need to get the school involved in all of this. Your son needs to feel safe and secure. He needs to know that the adults are there for him and not against him. I hope this helps.

It's the teacher's responsibility to ensure safety for the children that attend that school. Sounds like the bully needs to goto an alternative school and the teacher needs to goto some kind of training to attend to this sort of thing. I thought they'd teach that in teacher's school but I guess they don't. Bullys usually mistreat another kid or kids due to some underlying cause going on w/himself (or herself). Usually being abused at home or just being a 'throw away' at home, not receiving the loving attention they need as children so there usually IS a reason this goes on, it's usually out of frustration & anger towards personal issues & your son happens to be the one being picked on b/c the bully feels superior when he bullys someone he or she is either jealous of or feels superior over, like the child is beneath him/her. Ya know, I had the same thing growing up, from kindergarten ALL THE WAY through high school! The same kids in all of my classes, I was THE one that was picked on & bullied to the extreme & this was NONE STOP! EVERY day. NOTHING was done about it. Only a couple of teachers actually took up for me which I appreciated but as the yrs progressed the teachers didn't care or do anything about it in most of the classes, nor did the principal. A good example is one day I broke my leg & had to use crutches & the teacher left the rm for some reason; then, one boy that bullied me in that class took the one crutch so I couldn't go anywhere & I grabbed one end to get it back & it pulled apart. He was like "oh I'm sorry here let me put it together" then he kept it & proceeds to put it next to the teacher's desk & when the teacher came bk in, I kept trying to get her attention & when I finally did, asked her to bring me my crutch. She looked at me as if I were crazy & she said, "well where is it" I said "next to your desk, you stepped over it as you sat down" she looked down at it then at me & asked how it got there & I told her; then she said "well I'M not going to walk over there & hand it to you, you come and get it!" I said, "I can't, I needed crutches, I broke my leg, remember??" She said she was much too busy to do things like that and if I wanted it I had to come get it. I asked why didn't she make the kid who put it there go bring it to me & she said basically that it was my crutch & if I wanted it, I had to come get it. So then I asked "well how am I supposed to do that?" She said, well, you have one good leg, hop over. I looked at her like she was the dumbest creature & said, are you crazy? My cast is plaster & very heavy, what if I fall & she said well that wasn't her problem. So I, humiliated, hopped as best I could on one leg...a VERY heavy plaster cast, you may remember those days of heavy plaster casts whether you had one or not...& proceeded to retrieve my crutch all the while kids just going histerical & just laughing at me, SO hard. I was SO humiliated, I was crying & everything. I think I DID tell on her & the boy to the principal but as usual, nothing was done about it. 90% of the teacher's at my school were on the bully's side everytime. I don't know why. My mom tried several times to talk to the teachers, the principal & they did mi-nute things like move him across the room (& there was more than one, mind you). But eventually, we got stuck back together again so it was fruitless. My best advice to you would be that go up there, have a meeting w/his teacher or teachers AND principal both, bring up the fact that they made YOUR son stand in the corner, not the bully. Tell them that bullying is against the law & if they don't do anything about it, you will take it to a higher authority if you have to and be stern & firm about it not passive b/c if you come across as 'meaning business', they may listen & actually do something about it. If you've already tried 'nicely' to talk to them, tell them there are now laws protecting children from bullying in schools that may not have been in place yrs ago but there are now & just say and do what you must to get the point across. I wish you the best of luck & really really hope something is done about the bullys in your school and any school for that matter.

When I was growing up, I was taught that you don't fight no matter what. I once tried stopping a fight and the rest of the day, one of the parties involved kept coming after me. By the end of the day, she came after me full force and had my best friend not stepped in, I would have been creamed because I wouldn't fight back.

My husband was bullied terribly in school. He was put in lockers, trash cans, etc. He took martial arts and learned to defend himself. He finally got to the point where he had had enough and defended himself against the bully that had tormented him for years. That was the end of it. The bully never bothered him again and my husband had renewed self-respect. However, to this day (he's now 47) it is still hurtful to him to think about how he was treated. He is determined that our son know how to defend himself.

My 2 cents, take your son to a martial arts or self defense class. He will learn that you NEVER start a fight but he will also learn how to defend himself if he needs to. It is very traumatic for kids to be bullied by peers. Think how many kids have gone to school with guns because they were bullied. It will also help to keep his self-esteem from going downhill.

One last note, I've read some of the other posts and although the advice is well-intentioned, I wonder if these people remember being 13 and in school. It's a very tough age and kids that are bullies this age do not go away just because you ignore what they are doing. Also, having your son go to the principal is going to make everyone start treating him as a tattle tale. Kids can be very cruel at this age. Yes, the proper authorities need to be advised of the situation. Yes, the teacher needs a good talking to (I would be furious with the teacher) and yes, the situation needs to be monitored but I believe the parent (you) needs to be talking to the principal and the teacher, not your son. The retaliation from the bully could be worse if he thinks your son is telling on him.

I haven't read what everyone said but I just want to say that what that teacher did is illegal. No child is supposed to receive a form of punishment in front of his/her peers. I would talk to the principal. That is uncalled for. So glad your son was able to talk to you because apparently he can't talk to his teacher.
Hugs to you and wish you the best!

S.

Bullying is not something to take lightly, it will stick with him for a long time. I would suggest a parent teacher conference. Let the teacher know that it is not him just "tattle taleing" he is actually being bullied. The teacher needs to take preventative measures. Changing the class seating chart would be the first step and from their she needs to make sure they are not in any group activities together. This is part of her job! Your child can not learn what he needs and gain self-esteem if he is being subjected to daily bullying. If she is not complient, go up the chain, talk to the principal, and then the super intendant. Bullying only gets worse as time goes on and he should NOT be punished for coming forward about it, especially at age 13, he is not in kindergarten and should not be treated as so! Please take action quick, children can be severely traumatized by bullies! Take care and God Bless.

Liz...
Well first of all I don't believe there is such a think as tattle telling in a 13 yr old boy. This is beyond the age that things can escalate and something can go terribly wrong. But obviously the teacher isn't wanting to deal with the really bulling problem. My oldest daughter has had a couple of bullies, So i put her in Karate.. she DID A GREAT JOB, and it built up her confidence to know that what people say and what people do doesn't always matter. She has now stood up for herself and i think she has the confidence to do it again if necessary. It, also has taught her how to defend herself if every in a situation. I HIGHLY recommend this, Because we are not always there and we see this age group on the news every day for something that was unimaginable when we were growing up. If you are in the woodlands/conroe area i can refer you to an Awesome karate class... God Bless.

First of all, I'd like to have a talk with that teacher and ask her what the idea was behind him doing what he is suppose to do and advise the teacher when someone is bothering him. Or do they want your child to one day be so fed up with being treated like this that he turns around and punches him in the face? (which I would have no problem with, if my child did if he were being treated that way) Isn't that the whole idea of zero tolerance for bullying? Or is the teacher all for backing the bully?

Secondly, as a parent, I would make sure that my child was involved in an activity (martial arts) that would encourage him to have more confidence. I am NOT saying your child lacks confidence, but if he felt that he could face this kid and tell him to STOP, then maybe he just might. Sometimes, when a kid who is being picked on just stands up for themselves, the bully looks for another kid to pick on cause they don't make it easy. If your child already feels like he can defend himself when he stands up to the bully, then I say you back your child and tell him to say STOP to this bully. If the bully continues, I say go beyond the teacher and talk to the counselor and principal!

Good luck!! And I am proud of your child for coming to you and telling you. That is a sure sign that he needs your guidance and comfort in his next steps in dealing with this. No parent wants their child to be picked on, so please listen to your son, talk to him and let him know that you will not stop helping him resolve this until it is stopped. Also, don't assume that the situation is resolved. Always keep a dialogue between you and your son about this matter. He might one day feel like you don't need to worry about it, when you want to know. Just let him know that!

Good luck!!!!!