Advice on Working and Sick Kids!

I have three kids and have had a great home business for years now. I'd love to help you out.
My info. is on my home page.
~Peace
Chrissee

H S.,
The best advice I could give you is to do what's best for your kids first and always. I would take vacation time (if that's available--you are PT, as am I and I don't get any vaca) instead of taking unpaid time off. I would let her know asap when & if you are going to miss. Do what you can from home (check email, voicemails, etc) while you are out. Express to your boss that your job is important to you but there are not many options when your kid gets sick, and tell her that you appreciate her understanding.

I do the same as Diane C. posted. Try to be available by phone or e-mail esp.during naps and split the day with my husband whenever possible. I always send the non-sick child (I also have 2 kids)to daycare so there are fewer distractions.

Other than that, like others have said, I recommend letting your boss's comments "bounce off". You know your priorities and have to act on them. I had a boss who did not really understand needing to take time off for children-related reasons and she had 2 kids! But I felt redeemed when one time she told me that she felt that while she could be a good role model for me as an example of a success in our field, I was an example to her of a good parent.

I have an elderly (well older) couple that I can call in a pinch if my kids get sick. I don't work very often so when I do I don't like to call off when they are sick. Do some leg work...ask neighbors, friends, people at your church if they would know anyone who is willing to be with your kids on the occasional sick day. I understand that your kids do come first but for many people, keeping a job IS actually putting their kids first because this is their only means of feeding and clothing and providing health care for them. Where there is a will there is a way...you may just have to work a little harder at finding back up.

I've heard of 'sick daycares' too....A daycare ran by nurses who can care for your child on a day that you really can't miss.

It sucks.....
I have 3 kids and my youngest has been sick alot here lately.(Poor thing had nasty fevers with ear infections over the winter and now he has allergy induced bronchitis)At the company i work at you have to find your own replacement or you work(yes it's that strict...i am looking for a new job now b/c of that reason)but here's what i would do..
My parents live about an hour away,they'd take the youngest for me when he was really bad.I hate to say this but I had to send him to day care(and my older 2 too school)sick.Thank God the ladies there loved him and they took good care of him for me but it just isn't the same.........
You have to do what's best for your family.The thing i tell my husband is...
"Jobs can come and go but my children and him come first."

But i wish i was more help.But i'm in the same place you are.Both my bosses have no children so they don't get it.

Hi S.!

I hear stories like yours all of the time and it breaks my heart. Yes, we all understand that at work the show must go on but our children are top priority no matter what! When I had my first baby I too had a very important job in Human Resources. Although I was allowed to take 3 months leave, I had to bring my computer home an continue to work from home with this little precious baby laying by my side. My boss (who was also my father-in-law) would call me and say, "you are missed here and we have to get you back to work ASAP!" Just goes to show you that even family doesn't understand being out of work! It's all about the business running smoothly!!! I went back to work full time for 8 months crying everyday I left that bundle of joy at daycare! Then I decided to work part time until #2 came along then I had to do something. My husband said, "quit your job!" I never thought we'd servive but we did. We're on top of the world now! He and I have since realised it is much more beneficial to own our own companies! I haven't looked back at all and am loving being able to be in every part of my 3 children's lives! If you'd like more info, please e-mail me or check out my ____@____.com or www.tastefullysimple.com/web/lsmoker or www.premierdesigns.com
Take Care! L.

As my husband would say...and I quote " our kids come first over any job" Any time I ever interviewed in the past I always made that crystal clear. Now that I work from home part-time it is not so much and issue and they hardly ever get sick. I still leave the house one day a week to work, but I make sure my husband can be here to avoid the sick kid situation. Kids are going to get sick. That's what is wromg with todays society, what ever happended to family first, work second. www.livegreeneasy.com

This is really tough. I am in a similar situation - I don't have family nearby and my LO is in daycare so they won't take him if he's sick (and I wouldn't want to send him anyway).

I do a few things to try to be available to my boss and try to keep projects moving forward when the baby is sick - they may or may not work for you depending on your work situation. First, I have internet service at home and I check my email really frequently (at least hourly) and I respond to as much as I can so that nothing urgent is left incomplete. I cc my boss on anything relevant so that he knows I'm getting work done from home. I also tell my boss that if he needs anything that is time-sensitive to call me. If I have my hands full when an email comes in or when the phone rings, I call back/respond during naptimes. Second, we are fortunate that my husband also has some flexibility in his job, so we usually also split the day - I go to work until lunchtime, then we trade off and he goes to work in the afternoon. That way, we are each only taking off 1/2 day and we can both get the most important things done that day.

Balancing doesn't always work, and there are many times when I end up feeling like I do enough either at work or at home because my attention was so split all day. But it's the best I can come up with!

There are other resources you may be able to find. I work in Pittsburgh and there is a sick child room here where you can take your child when they are sick. It is fairly expensive for a day but it is open to anyone, is staffed by a nurse, and if there is something going on at work that you really can't miss, it is available. If you ask around, you may be able to find something like this where you are.

Good luck!

S.,
I had this same problem when I was working. My husband's job was too far of a commute, so the onus was on me to pick the kids up from daycare or stay home with them (cause he was already gone before they woke up). My boss had kids, but she also had a nanny and her in-laws lived in the same town. Though my family lives nearby, my parents are in their 40's and 50's and still work. It seemed as if everyone else had a family member that would "parent" their sick kids or pick them up if there was a snow day, etc...
I asked the company if I could have a laptop to take home with me and connect to the network on. This way, if I couldn't make it IN, I'd still be able to work, receive and respond to emails in a timely fashion. Sure, you can't do everything, but enough to not be too far behind.
Also, do you have any friends that are stay at home moms? I've watched my friends kids when they were sick because they had already played with my kids the day or 2 earlier, so chances are, my kids were going to be sick the next day anyways. Or, find a college student that can babysit some evenings for you. Then, if you need her during the day, chances are, she won't have classes all day, so you can do a half day instead of taking the whole day off.
Good luck. This is just such a difficult thing to deal with, especially when your boss hasn't been through the same thing.

That's such a tough situation to be in. I worked full time until a few months ago, and had my son in daycare, so I have been in your shoes. You just have to let it roll off your back, she apparently did not see fit to call you into her office on it, rather she chose to talk about you to your coworkers. I am a nurse and worked with a bunch of women too, so I feel your pain here also. But the bottom line is you need to decide if you are willing and able to stand your ground when it comes to your kids, when they need you, you will be using some of your sick time(i assume you have some). Kids will get sick and need your time. I am lucky enough to have been given a wonderful opportunity to dictate my hours worked and still make a wonderful income. Send me an email if you are interested in learning how you can do the same. Good luck! A.

I think your boss has some nerve seeing as she has no kids of her own, go figure! I also work full time and when my baby gets sick, I have to stay home with her too! That's just the way it is. You've been at your job for 5 years now. If I were you I would have a serious sit down with your boss. She needs to understand that you are a mother first and foremost. Let her know your feelings and try and sort it out with her. Best of luck to you!