5 Year Old Behavior/attention Issues

I think you are having a sleep prob. more of an attention prob. at 5yrs old most children are not really over naps. I mean they don't want one but they still need at least a quiet time. My daughter sure does from time to time even now. I can tell. She gets very testy. I will be out and if she starts getting mad about something she doesn't normally get mad about i know it's time for a quiet time. If i am not at home i will tell her. "You know how sometimes i will get mad and you won't know why, She will say "YES" well it's normally because i need some quiet time and she will say "Oh" Than i will go well i believe you need some quiet time now. You are starting to be mad. Do you like to be mad? "She will say "NO" and i will say " Well inorder to get over you need to have some time Quiet" and she will normaly try it out. It works. Amazingly enough.
At this age you can actually explain it and they understand. Everyone needs quiet time if it's given at the right time when they are this age not only will they not be so angry after a while normally they will sleep. Good luck

It sounds like you are describing our son exactly. He was just like that. We finally found out that it was a food allergy. He is allergic to red dye, and it was amazing to see what foods have red dye in them. Food allergies may be something to check into.

Wow, R., first you have to know that you are a superwoman and a supermom. I think your daughther is just trying to check where the limits are, and I think this is totally normal well as normal as difficult to deal with beacuse they are screaming for authority and atention, of course in a good sense which is thinking in a good way to saw her that she just can´t do this fight thing without consecuences. I know you are trying to spend more time with her and you would love to have fun together and saw her that she is as important as her brother and sister. I think I will try to be strong and as soon as something bad like that will happen, fun time is over, back home, go to your room,.... and as soon as she´s calm and happy and nice with you and her brother and sister the fun time is back and you both should do something together then.
I don´t know if that will help you but That´s my first instinct. Remember that no matter what you are the most important person in her live and she will always love you.
Good luck
P.

You have got a lot of little ones. A lot of kids (boys and girls) hate all shopping unless it's at a toy store. Next time you try for one on one time, try to pick something that would be fun for the child. Sometimes get a sitter so you can have some grown up "Me" time away from all the kids for an hour or two. Your oldest will be starting school soon and being with some other older kids will have her acting her age more often rather than acting like a baby to get attention. They'll grow up before you know it. In 10 years time you'll be dealing with teenage issues and wishing they were little again.

Insert boy/son and you sound just like I did a year ago. I too described my son (D) as Dr Jackyl/Mr Hyde and his moods/reactions were like a lightswitch. He reacted the exact same way when he would have a meltdown. It often took a couple hours for him to calm down once he got pissed. It was soooooo hard to deal with him. I only have one other son (C) (the boys are twins) but D would at times be mean to his brother but mostly it seems he saved the 'best' for me!! Last summer it started to get a little out of control but once D started 1st grade, it just went down hill from there. His poor teacher!
Bottom line, we had to put D in therapy because it seemed nothing we did really helped and he was just angry or inflexible about everything. After many months of therapy and a full neuopsych evaluation, it turns out he has ADHD. After long thought, we decided to try medication. OH MY GOODNESS what a difference. Like any 6 year old, he will still get angry but it's a 'normal' angry. We can calm him down, or he calms himself but in a much much shorter period of time. His grades have improved dramatically and it's just easier all around. The other day when we were getting ready for school, he comes up and asks for his meds. I asked why did he want his meds (just to see what he would say) and he replied "because they make me feel better". I was floored. He is just happier overall.

I'm not saying your daughter has ADHD or that medication is the answer to your problems, but I am suggesting that you seek help. The hubby and I really tried to handle things differently, we sought help as parents first and then finally for our son directly. I cried all too often over this and was exhausted to the bone. I am grateful for the patience of his teacher who saw the smart little guy behind the anger and never gave up on him. I'm grateful for his therapist who was always there to help him and help us!! Seek help. If you're not sure where to start, then start with your pediatrician. Ask her for a recommendation on a therapist and then go.

I wish you luck because I know how hard this is. I know that it can overwhelm you and your family and your daughters behavior can become the focus of your family. It happened in our home so quickly and since we were so overwhelmed by it, we didn't realize it until our other son asked why we were ignoring him and giving his brother all the attention. That was an eye opener. We've made a point of giving him his own time and own choices so his brothers issues doesn't overshadow how wonderful he is.

Feel free to contact me directly if you need anything else.

____@____.com
julie

hi R.,
you've got a LOT on your plate, girl! good for you for finding and carving out some one on one time for your big girl, and recognizing how badly she needs this.
how about next time if you let her choose how to spend this precious time with mom? shopping is IT for some kids, but maybe yours would like to go to the park, get ice cream, something where the focus would be on her and let her slow down and open up to you. sounds like both you need some sweet, uninterrupted time together.
good luck!
khairete
S.