4 Yr Old Boy Wetting at Night

J., I am actually interested in all the responses you get. My almost 6 year old had to go back to pull ups at night because I got tired of washing bedding everyday. He just doesn't wake up to pee. I do have a vinyl zipper sheet/bag on his bed under his "water proof" mattress pad. I guess I was hoping he would outgrow it.

First thing you might want to try is to put a potty right next to his bed. He is probably not actually peeing in his sleep, but at moments when he is woken a bit at night. If he is right next to the potty he may be more likely to use it when he wakes.
Also I would try a cloth trainer. Laying in wet cloth is not very comfortable and may encourage him to get up to use the potty.

HI Jaime,

It is not unusual at all for a little boy to potty train after 3. (Little girls tend to start this process earlier.) It's not that unusual for the issue at night either especially since you and your ex may have different routines for him. I think your concern might be a bit premature. Isn't it funny how we hope and pray that our babies will sleep through the night and then when they do, we want to wake them up to go to the bathroom?

Don't stress this. He's still got time.

God bless!

M.

First thing is you need to sit down with his dad and talk about how things go over at his house. If he puts him in pull ups at night then you need to come to an agreement on either pull ups or underware at both houses. Same with cutting off liquids by a certain time, etc. Your son is only 4 and staying with a different parent every week can really confuse him because no sooner does he get used to being a daddy's house, he is staying at mommy's and vice versa. So either things need to be done the same way at both houses or you need to lengthen the time spent at each house to 2 weeks or even a month. Also look at long term at how this arrangement is going to work when he starts school.
My daughter is almost 8yrs old and goes to her dad's for 6-7 weeks every summer and I have to 'reprogram' her for almost a week when she comes home beceause they do things just the opposite as we do. We eat dinner between 5-6 and they eat dinner between 8-9pm (they say you eat dinner when it is dark out!!). She is in bed by 10pm on a non school night, there when ever she wants. Here TV is limited in how long and what she can watch, there her dad watchs Sponge Bob (not allowed in my house) with her. This also causes her to have attitude problems for me as well because she is pretty much allowed to do what she wants there. I've tried to get him and I on the same page but he won't do it and has the attitude that he is 900 miles away and I can't do anything about it!!

So have a chit chat with dad and make sure everyone is on the same program and see if that doesn't help things out some.

Good luck!

Thanks for your question I just asked the same one before I saw yours. It seems that boys have this problem for a long time so I guess I will just put mine in a pull up at night so we can avoid the waking up. Since this could possible go on for a long time, it seems our boys are still young compared to some other responses.

I have a 4 year old boy, and he occasionally wets the bed as well sometimes, but I have noticed with him it is usually when something different is going on that changes his routine. With your child it may be just the change in the routine of him going from your house to the other parents house. I think you should discuss the situation with his other parent(s) and try to get your son on a simalar routine for bedtime. Also for the time being you might want to invest in a waterproof mattress pad. I also have a pad under my sons mattress pad, (that I got from Babies R Us-they come in packs of 2) that has a rubber side and a soft side to protect his mattress.

My son is 6 1/2 and still wets the bed. He has been potty trained for many years now and has no accidents at all during the day - ever. I talked to his doctor about it in length and he said to only start worrying about it if he's still doing it by the time he's 15. That blew me away, but then he explained. He said there is a hormone in your body that "switches on" when you're sleeping that slows down the production of urine. It's a type of safety mechanism in your body. For instance, if you're in the desert and you're dehydrated, your body will kick in that hormone to stop producing urine because it knows you need to retain all the water it can. The same thing happens when you sleep. It doesn't stop producing altogether, but it slows it down quite a bit. My son isn't producing that hormone yet; therefore, he continues to produce the same amount of urine when he's sleeping as he does when he is awake. MANY kids have this problem.

The second part of the problem is that he sleeps so heavy that the urge to pee doesn't wake him up, which is another problem many kids have. My doctor said your body can be trained to wake up when the urge is there. He told me about a product called the SleepDry Alarm. It's a little alarm that attaches to his shirt, with a wire that attaches to his underwear in the front. When he's sleeping and starts to pee the moisture hits the wire and sounds the alarm. The moment the alarm goes off it triggers him to stop peeing and wakes him up. I worried it wouldn't wake him up because he's a heavy sleeper, but it does wake him up immediately and it instantly stops him from continuing to pee. He detaches the wire, gets up, goes to pee, changes his underwear (which only has a tiny wet spot) I help him re-attach it and he goes back to bed. After a while the idea is that his body will learn to recognize the urge, even without the alarm.

We've been using it for a week and a half and it's working well, as far as waking him up before the bed is soaked, or even before his underwear are soaked. Every child is different so it could take one child three weeks or another child three months. It is a learned behavior, so you never know how long it could take.

So far, I'm very happy because we haven't used one single pull-up and haven't had one single mess on the bed. He's very pleased with it, too.

You can Google SleepDry Alarm and read all kinds of feedback about it from customers. Hope that helps.

This is something he will outgrow as the neuro pathways in his brain mature. In the meantime, you need to be sure you are making this a non-issue and not turning it into something that will hurt his self-esteem. Some children (especially boys) don't outgrow bed wetting until they are ten years old. Just use pull-ups and try not to make a big deal of it. Restricting his fluids will not help whether or not he has accidents, although it will affect the volume somewhat. Even if he were dehydrated, he could still wet the bed since kidneys function more efficently when people sleep. Hang in there. It's quite normal, as you can see from the many, many posts about this on this website.

I have a 6.5 year old that is wetting the bed. He has several males in the family that also wet until they were over 8. When he was 4 I thought he was very close to being done with pull ups, then he started wetting more frequently. In my "research" I have come to the conclusion that his bladder isn't developing as fast as the rest of him. So basically, he eats and drinks more, but is bladder can't keep up. We were at the doctor last week and I inquired about it. I was told that most will grow out of it by 6 or 7 but, some not until later (especailly if there is family history).
The main thing is t make sure he understands it is they way his body is developing and not a problem with him. My brother was a bed wetter and thankfully our parents were very nurturing about it. I know others that were ridiculed and felt very ashamed--please don't do this to him.
I have had the attitude to let it ride, no alarms, etc. I am willing to do this until he is 8 after that we may need to take another approach.
Best of luck.

You may need to wake up up in the middle of the night and take him just before you got to bed. Also night training takes longer than day training, my dd was in pullups at night till she was almost 5 when she suddenly started not wetting the bed. she stil has the occasional accident cause she is a hard sleeper and dosnt always wake up intime to not wet her self. He sounds like he may be close to training its just a case of him walking up and realizing he needs to go or him habing the control to stay the night. one morngn you will realize that he hasnt we the bed in a while. Also living at both houses does mess with a kid you deffinately need to get on the same page as his other parents. it will go faster if you have the same routine.

Hi J.,
Wow do I feel your pain! My little one has to go back and forth too. It is very frustrating, you do things one way and they do it another! I would attempt to talk about it with dad if he will listen. If he does, just try to get on the same page with his routine. If not, just do your own thing. There are MANY 4yr olds that cannot go all night without emptying their bladder. He is still developiing his little muscles. Your doing a great job, just dont stress about it. He still has plenty of time. One thing that might help is getting a cloth diaper for him (snapez.com is great). It will cost you about $25 but you can reuse it as many times as you want and you will never have to buy pullups for him again. I use them for my 3yr doing the same thing, it works out great! Best of luck to you!

My sun is 9 and still wets the bed. I've done the whole doctor thing they say hell grow out of it. Not giving water before bed, wakening him up in the middle of the night. It all gets old very quick! I don't know about you but I sure don't like doing sheets everyday!!!
What I found has helped is a bed wetting alarm. Basically its heavy cloth underwear with a sensor in it and an alarm is attached to it, once it gets wet the alarm will squeal and buzz waking the child up to go to the bathroom. I help allot, not completely though!

Good luck!