2 Yo No Longer Sleeping in His Bed

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GOOD LUCK with your little one!

E.:

Are your parents allowing him to sleep in their bed? If so, you need to let them know that it is not okay, for him to do so. Is there anything else (change) going on in his life right now? The "giving in" is his hope, and you need to be responsible for not giving in. Take him to the store and let him pick out his own "sleep buddy", praise him and let him know what a big boy he is and that he and his sleep buddy are going to sleep in his "big boy" room. Gradually take yourself out of his room (stay 10 minutes one night, 5 the next...). Yes, he may cry but it is an adjustment. A 2 year old needs to be sleeping in his own bed and you and your huband need your "grown up" room.

A.

My son had the same problem. Right after his 2nd birthday and a month after my husband had started the night shift at a new job, my son resorted to sleeping in my bed with me. It didn't bother me and tried to move him to a bigger bed (he had orginally been sleeping a crib converitable) and he didn't like it. So I just let him sleep with me and on the weekends that my husband was home, he slept on the floor. We moved the following summer, and the first night in our new place, he started sleeping in his own bed and has been ever since. I'm not sure why he wanted to sleep with me or if he ever had a problem. But I think it just comforted him to know that he could watch over me when Daddy wasn't home to do it. He still occasionally tries to crawl in bed with me, but I always take him back to his bed and he usually stays there and goes back to sleep.
I would talk to your parents. Does he sleep with them or does he sleep in his own bed? Also, is he still in a crib? Make him feel like a big 2 year old boy and get him a toddler bed, let him pick it out. I think he's in the big boy stage..especially now he can sleep with the big boy and big girl. Hope these ideas/suggestions help.

My son also went through a phase where he wanted to sleep with us. So I started letting him sleepon the floor next to my bed. Then he was out of my bed and I could get some sleep then gradually move the pallate that he sleeps on out of the room scoot it closer and closer to the door. This worked for me. Also you might ask wif the grandparents are letting him sleep with them, something is going on over there for him to come home and act like this. So I would do some checking it may be nothing but it may be something. Hope this helps you.

A little about me:
I have 3 kids 7,4,2 and stay at home with my kids. I have a wounderful husband. We enjoy doing family things.

HI E., The first thing I would do is call my parents and ask them if anything happened while he was there. Is this the first time he spent time away from you and your husband? It seems he has become insecure about you leaving him for some reason. Maybe letting him lay down in the same room that your in while he is taking a nap might help ease the insecurity. maybe if you held him till he falls asleep,it seems he just needs to know mama is going to be there. I know it may seem like your contributing to the problem,if you do this, but hysterically crying only causes him and you grief.

Our daughter is about the same age and has just started having nightmares. Have you asked your son why he is so upset? Our daughter will start wailing and say she had a bad dream. Our solution has been to rock her in her room and talk to her about what upset her. Then we reasure her that everything is fine and that we are right there nothing bad will happen. Your son may be worried that you will leave again while he is sleeping.

My other trick is to ask her if there is something that will make her feel better, such as a toy or a light, etc... Sometimes she will ask to go to our room and have a drink of water. Before I agree I reminder that she can sit with us for a while, but once she feels better we are going to come back upstairs so she can sleep in her own bed. We always encourage her to try and articulate her fears. My husband and I always ask her to use her words so we can help make things better. You might be surprised at what you find out once you get him to explain why he is so upset.

Hi,
Our daughter did the same thing. My husband is a farmer and we get up at 4:30 am...we needed sleep. WE put her in her bed and told her that this is where she is going to sleep. I took a magazine and sat outside her door and turned the lights out in her room. She cried and cried and I just sat there. We established an 8:00 bedtime and for three nights she cried for about 30 minutes...then on the fourth night she wimpered about 5 minutes. The next day she was so proud of herself! And we were rested!
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Tammy

My first child slept in my bed until she was nearly 4. (co-sleeping advocates had me convinced it was right--I don't think so anymore!) What finally got her over it was NOT "crying it out." Actually that backfired and caused her to fear her bedroom, she wouldn't even go in there for toys. First of all, we bought her a regular twin bed and got rid of the toddler bed. Then, we made a big deal about buying sheets, comforter, etc. of her favorite character. We really made it a "big girl" thing. Finally, I phased out of her room. I started sitting on the bed until she fell asleep for a few nights, sat on a chair next to the bed for a few nights, sat in the middle of the room for a few nights, then in the doorway, etc etc. You get the idea. The important thing was to stay until she slept. I didn't pay any attention to her after the official good night routine, I read a book or something quiet. Over time, I phased myself out of the room. It can be time consuming and may drag on, but you have to be firm and consistent. Also you need to determine how long is best to stay at each phase. Finally, every time my child snuck out of bed at night she got taken right back to bed. Once you decide the child needs to stay in his bed, you need to make sure that happens. If not, all he will learn is that you don't really mean it. Yes, you will be tired for awhile!! I hope this helps.

I had hard times w/my daughter until I followed the advice of Dr. Ferber in the book "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems". http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=br_ss_hs/102-###-###-####-###...

Let me know if you have questions. It worked for me immediately.

I have had this problem with 2 of my 3 kids when they were younger also. Does he have a nightlight in his room? Or maybe some sort of "fun" light, you know what I mean? Does he like to read (or at his age) look at books? Try putting him to bed and telling him that he does not have to go to sleep but has to stay in his bed and look at his books, or even a few toys, usually they will fall asleep after a while of playing or reading. It is hard and you just have to put your foot down, he will eventually stop crying even though it does not seem like it at the time you just have to make him stay in there. Have you tried rewarding him with something if he does sleep in his bed?

E.,
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I AS WELL HAVE A SON THAT HAS DONE THE SAME THING. ONE THING THAT MIGHT HELP IS HAVING A TALK WITH YOUR PARENTS. LET THEM KNOW WHAT IS HAPPENING AND THAT YOU WOULD LIKE THEIR HELP WITH THIS ISSUE BY MAKING SURE THEY HAVE A ROOM OF HIS OWN THAT HE CAN SLEEP IN AND MAKING SURE THEY ENFORCE THE RULE OF SLEEPING THERE LIKE YOU ARE TRYING TO DO. I HAD TO SIT WITH MY SON EVERY NIGHT FOR ABOUT 2 WEEKS, BUT THE FIRST FEW DAYS I WOULD SIT WITH HIM TILL HE WENT TO SLEEP. THEN I STARTED TAPERING OFF THE TIME. ALL THE WHILE EITHER SINGING OR READING TO HIM. I ALSO FOUND THAT SAYING A PRAYER WITH HIM AND TELLING HIM TO DREAM OF ANGELS HELPED AS WELL. BY THE END OF THE SECOND WEEK I WAS ABLE TO TUCK HIM IN AND KISS HIM GOOD NIGHT AND WALK OUT OF THE ROOM...HIS PROBLEM MAY BE JUST AN INSECURITY PROBLEM. THEY DO GROW OUT OF THAT ALTHOUGH MY SON, NOW 7, STILL HAS BOUTS OF INSECURITY. YOU JUST HAVE TO STICK TO YOUR RULES AND EVENTUALLY HE WILL OVERCOME THAT PROBLEM. GOOD LUCK.

Get the "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" book. You will be able to use it for other sleep problems. It is the best resource for any sleep related problems. And it is best to prevent or fix it early, so I would go get it tonight and read it. Also, make sure your hubby reads it also or at least discuss your plan so you can have full support.

My four year old started doing the same thing. I got him a flashlight to sleep with, this seemed to ease his fear.
I also got him a little radio to play a CD of kids music.
I just turn everything off when I go to bed.

I hope you find something that works =)

This might not be a permanent solution but as I have said in other posts I have had 4 cosleeper kids and at the transition point one of the things that helped was letting them fall asleep in our bed and moving them into theirs.I don't know if your little one sleeps that soundly but you can do this so he is not screaming and you are sleeping.Good luck!!

A.

Hi E.,

Watching Supernanny on TV has helped my husband and I a lot. You might consider watching a few episodes. Also, the Johnson County Library has a book of hers. Here's some info. copied and pasted from their site.

Happy Parenting,

D.

Supernanny : how to get the best from your children
Frost, Jo.

Summary
Jo Frost, a.k.a. SuperNanny, is the answer to every stressed-out parent's dreams. In Abc's upcoming primetime tv series by the same name, Jo works miracles on problem children by dispensing hard-won wisdom and reassuring us that parents really do know best. The SuperNanny method gives parents the know-how to tackle problem areas such as mealtime, bath time, bedtime, bedwetting, homework, sibling rivalry, aggressive behavior, or a child who just won't do what he or she is told to do. Divided into action-oriented problem and solution sections, SuperNanny will show parents how to restore harmony and authority in the home using the SuperNanny's ten basic rules.